Guys you are not going to believe what I did

Guys you are not going to believe what I did
I'm officially the stupidest person on this board
And the worst driver
I'm gonna kill myself now
And if I survive that I'm gonna take the bus from now on

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=I0CaHIv3kU0
archive.4plebs.org/o/thread/16963511/#16963511
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

Oh and to top it off
This is not the first time I've done this and then made a thread about it

The fuck you do OP?

Did you crash into a lake? That’s something that haven’t done before

Did you pull the handbrake?

C O O L V I B R A T I O N S

storytime!

this

thread theme:
youtube.com/watch?v=I0CaHIv3kU0

When I get home I will

ok op here im home now
before i sudoku myself ill tell my tale of woe so you can laugh at me
its not much of a story but ill tell it anyway
>just had dinner at my moms house
>got gas on the way home
>didn't feel like going home yet so just driving around
>on road im not familiar with
>its really foggy tonight
>roads are slick
>brand new tires, not even broken in yet
>im rather complacent and comfortable
>fail to anticipate sharp turn
>whyisthecarnotturning.wtf
>jump over small ditch into some blackberry bushes
>sit in my car seriously considering killing myself for like 10 minutes
>some guy in a big comfy caddy sees me in the brambles and stops to see if im ok
>he gives me a ride home
>im at home now
sorry for the picture quality
i snapped it real quick as i left

oh and
>its still out there
>my legs are all cut up and are on fire from climbing through blackberries
>i just had to call my dad and ask him to help me pull it out in the morning
>im going to be the laughing stock of my family now after crashing another car
>i will pay one of you to actually kill me

oh and for more ridicule
this is also me

You probably slammed on the brakes and then yanked the wheel one way or another. Guaranteed to wind up in the ditch doing that. Hopefully the car is okay.

>op is an eternal fag
the universe wants you dead
kys and stop driving cars

you just can't handle all that fwd power, not everybody can, so mebbe your next car should be a s2000 or something easy like that

What the fuck went wrong here, liftoff oversteer?

don't kill yourself g, just get your car pulled out and quit driving so fuckin fast irl. be like me and drive safe irl and wreck cars trying to go fast in beamng

honestly i didn't register the turn at first and im not sure what i did
im sure it was something very avoidable
read the op
way ahead of you buddy
solid advice ty
on that particular occasion i was just havin a giggle
doin 4wd driftz on gravel mountain road but as it turns out i am not ken block so i ditched it
theres a whole thread about it in the archive somewhere i could find for you if you want
yeah im goin out there tomorrow morning to try and pull it out
my dad has a truck
if i have to call a tow again though ill actually kill myself

lmao

>>its really foggy tonight
>>roads are slick

you in or around vancouver?

Did you take a look at it at all? Massive damage or what?

god dammit shingo

no im in SOregon
archive.4plebs.org/o/thread/16963511/#16963511
heres some quality reading material about my last adventure
the car started fine and the tires spun when i tried to back out
however im not sure about my suspension going over that ditch
i did see some plastic molding on the ground and im sure my paint is all scratched

Paint is for pussies who care too much about their car as a status symbol.

well it wasn't in terrific condition anyway so im not concerned about it
im more concerned about my suspension and wheels and undercarriage

I'm sure nothing bottomed out considering you landed in bushes

Did you hit anything solid like big rocks or was is mostly grass/bushes? You might have lucked out if it was a soft impact. Was there like airtime or did it just slide off?
If you just slid off into some bushes I wouldn't worry about real damage to drive-ability.

if you're afraid of getting clowned on make something up, like you swerved for a deer, cat, dog etc

i used to deliver pizza and one time i was the only car on a quiet suburban street with a median and i was counting a bunch of ones while driving to figure out how much money i had made and i hit the fucking median and completely popped my tire. i obv told everyone that a dog had jumped in front of me.

bonus idiocy, it was a pontiac grand prix and i didn't have a spare or a donut. i called my dad and he drove out to help me. he had a lincoln towncar and it had same amount of lugnuts so i put on HIS spare tire, in the dark cold winter night while he sat in his car chuckling i'm sure, and the tire must have been too big because pontiac wouldn't budge. so i had to remove dad's spare, put back on my flat and get the thing towed

at least i didn't have to wash dishes that night

I ditched my old bravada because I thought AWD made me invincible. I am dumb enough to admit the mistakes I will make again.

it was mostly just bushes
it was a bumpy ride but i didn't feel any hard impacts
there was no perceivable airtime. the ditch was only like a foot or two deep and the bushes were a bit lower than the road
i really hope there wasnt any damage
thanks for the sentiment but im gonna just tell it like it is
i deserve whatever i get
plus ive already told my sister and my dad and they are for sure gonna tell everyone else
only person i am dreading telling is my mom
she already worries about my driving and this will just make it worse

meh you're good. You swerved to avoid a deer

OP I’m really trying hard not to be mean here but seriously go do some driving courses FFS

Not that big of a deal, be more careful ight man.

go ahead and be mean
maybe ill stop being stupid if im told to enough
ty for the kind words user

fix it yourself
stop driving so fast
the more you fix it after you break it, the less you fond yourself breaking it....

i dont know what all needs fixing yet

>implying that what you did is a death sentence

stop acting like you just ran over a crowd while doing burnouts in a mustang, or t-boned a minivan full of kids while street racing, or killed a couple in a head-on accident while you were drunk

dumping your car in a ditch because you understeered is a pretty honorable way to crash because you didn't inflict damage on anyone else

also, visit /hg/, i have a blue prelude that's around the same age as yours

U need better tyres user it should not understand that bad.

Get some decent suspension as well.

I've been where I have btw get good

This. I straight parked my car on top of a Chinese kid. You'll be fine.

Story?

i know im just pissed off at myself
and when i get it back on the road ill swing by /hg/
heres a pic of the car in better times
i actually just put on new tires
got them as a gift from my dad
but he doesn't know shit about cars and just ordered whatever all seasons you can get for 50 bucks each
lmao

basically this OP. Not trying to be an a-hole but you are really not a good driver yet, take it slow and safe. Now if you want to learn to be a fast driver a few things, one do it in remote lonely areas that way if you loose control you only end up in ditches again, second have some money for repairs or new/secondary car since you might wreck one. Also dont push to much ease into it, speed cornering, new roads, etc ,etc. Also remember you have to pay to play when you drive hard you might get pulled over, your vehicle will wear out faster, you might crash, or worse. So never push too much, driving fast is for fun its not a race in a closed track or a life and death situation.

no. for the love of god you cant just post that and not post the story. i will find you and piss on your cat if you do.

>this is also me

Hopefully it's not too bad when you get it out. I did the same thing. Got mighty close to a tree. I wasn't even going fast, but I hit the brakes a little too hard and the road surface was very slippery.

>Civic owners in charge of not falling into ditches

ahh but thats the thing
when im actually trying to drive fast i am very cautious and i dont do it in traffic or anything
but tonight i was just cruising and was not concentrating on driving like i should have been
and ill never make that mistake again
im pretty sure he was just being funny
as there are lots of videos of chineses casually running over children
archive.4plebs.org/o/thread/16963511/#16963511
lol was that 2 weeks ago am i reading that right?
what is it that makes us such shit drivers

Yep that's when it was. My lip got pulled off but that's it. If it hit that tree though, it would have been a whole different story but I went in so slowly it probably would have been minor damage.

I'm not the best driver but I think I've gotten fairly good at avoiding the crazy women drivers that never watch where they're going.

well im glad she made it out ok
cross your fingers mine isnt fucked

Fingers crossed m8. Most I expect is being dirty and some scratches. The underside is fairly tough I think.

Post results in , they'll be interested and could give advice and shit.

>result of mine

Literally nothing. Threw the lip in the back. Still haven't put it back on yet.

will do friend

God dammit op you're part of the reason there are no clean old Civics anymore.

Just be glad nothing serious happend. Lost my brother last year by a drunk driver. Running your shitbox into some bushes and escaping with a couple of scratches is nothing, you can always get a new car. Stay safe user

Yo Subaditch, member me?

Yeah also fucked up again, though only a little.

Went over a speed bump way too fast so the comfy but soft as fuck - almost boat like - Volvo suspension led into bottoming out.
Luckily only the tow coupling and the plug got fucked a bit, was an easy fix.

Anyways, don't get too demotivated. At some point you maybe gonna learn your lesson. Or you gonna die in a tragic accident, but don't freakin' kys.

I'm guessing that you saw both accidents coming and that you scrubbed the speed off pretty well before impact because, in both incidents, you didn't get disfigured and your cars suffered minimal damage.

>tfw the closest I've been to an accident in my life in a car I was driving was locking up the brakes half a car length into an intersection in slightly icy conditions

thats not the point, the point is it CAN be fixed, think optimistic

Well, what did we learn from this?

I fucking love this board, you guys are the best

Have you considered driving like a normal person?

seems like there wont be a lot of damage tbhfampaifriend

Ditchbaru guy!

Thanks OP. You made me feel better about rolling my car after hitting an icy patch.
>tfw it still runs perfectly and literally everything but one mirror still works

im sorry
sorry for your loss user
i think i remember you
glad your brick held up
you'd be right
i was hard on the breaks before leaving the road both times
thx
to not crash anymore
i will certainly consider it in the future
hey
im surprised you didn't sustain more damage from rolling it
well im leaving to try and fish it out of the ditch now
see you on the other side Veeky Forums

Some of us have lessons we need to learn and it takes an accident to make it happen. Do your best to make it your last and just be more careful in the future
>pic related, crashed my first car

underrated
op keep doing whatever u are doing, you seem like absolute madman who is blast to be around with dead srs

>wow its fucking nothing
so i did not manage to pull it out
my dads truck is a truck in name only
its really a 2wd mall crawler
we hitched it up and the tires just spun
im gonna need to call for a tow
it like 30 feet from the road and theres a small hump it needs to get over
the truck just couldn't get the traction needed

side note i could not find my wallet last night but i know its in the car
i forgot to look today while i was there
so im not sure how im gonna pay for the tow as a have no cash

while i don't plan on ceasing my madness i am gonna be more attentive
while i was driving out there today i saw a sign signifying a 20mph turn with orange flashing lights that i must have missed
which probably means i was going close to 40 when i hit the turn which was the speed limit
i felt like a dumbass for not seeing that sign

ayyy lmao guys

That's a really nice location. Do many people take pictures of cars in that spot, because it looks like a really good place for it.

Jesus christ OP get a modern car with traction control and what not. You really need it.

not sure
i was just driving on a drive and pulled off here to turn around and thought id take a few pics

Hello fellow Oregonian. Might want to take an intermediate driving instructional course. Whereabouts in Oregon are you?

rogue valley

Ah, that's a beautiful area. Is it snowing there at all yet?

Unfortunately I've got no idea what kind of driving schools are around there since I'm from Corvallis.

no its not snowing
it barely gets below freezing
and its not a driving course i need
its better judgment

>the EF hatch in it's natural environment
I'm now waiting for the tow truck to get here

i don't think traction control would help someone who fails to slow down before a corner

yo my man is that purple tint

Traction control only assists with wheel spin under acceleration. Stability control may have helped, but depending on the situation it may have prevented him from slowing down as much as he did.

At least he has the balls to have fun. You can never get gud at something if you are to scared to try hard enough to fail.

>At least he has the balls to have fun.
going fast on unknown road isn't balls, it's just dumb. i did similar mistake, except i tried it on "rally" roads and dug myself into mud (i kinda knew the road, i haven't predicted that it turns into swamp in spring). i guess it was less punishing, fortunately.

i'm glad i started taking my car to the track, otherwise i'd probably still be doing that

did you get any blackberries? I have a fucking amazing and easy cobbler recipe

Veeky Forums: helpful as always

>my browser crashed as i was attaching pic related and i had to write this stupid bullshit twice
this is true
sure is ma boi
i don't think either of those would have saved me
maybe ABS
and id like to say i was being a speedy boy but really i was just cruising and got too comfortable/too into my music
i was actually going the speed limit but failed to see the 20mph speed advisory before the turn
combined with zero visibility, slick road surface, unfamiliar roads, and new un broken tires did me in
whenever i "race" i do it on roads that im already comfortable with
this is true
i should have been on alert in fog on a new road
i shan't make this mistake again
>"rally" roads
my nigger
the ditchbaru used to eat dirt mountain roads like it was ass like it was groceries
fun as fug
what car was it?
nah mane its winter
shits dried up
ill take that recipe tho
well if anyone is still here/still cares
i got her out and drove it home without incident
>cost me 100 burgers to get it out
not too bad considering
no damage at all that i can find
tomorrow im gonna wash it up make it pretty

also the dirt is misleading
most of it was already there from driving on dirt
i was up in the mountains where the subaru bit it
took some pics of the spot and of the other wreck site if anyone wants to see

Good shit, man. I'm sure some crud just needs washing underneath. You went way further off the road than I did. Kek

yeah i was like 30 feet out there lmao
ive already been pickin twigs and dirt out of my under carriage

are you the guy with the decked out FJ?

1/3 cup white sugar
1 cup AP flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 cup milk
1/4 cup melted butter
2 cups blackberries
1/2 cup white sugar
1 cup water

>Preheat oven to 350 degrees
>Grease a 9x9-inch baking dish.
>Whisk 1/3 cup sugar together with the flour and baking powder in a mixing bowl.
>Add in the milk and butter until a batter forms. >Scrape into prepared baking dish.
>Scatter blackberries on top of batter, and sprinkle with 1/2 cup sugar.
>pour water over top of the berries (water, sugar,and berries will all combine when baking)
>Bake until the batter has risen and the top is brown, 45 minutes to 1 hour.

Luckily it's an old Honda so there's nothing to damage under there. A newer car would have a bunch of plastic covers ripped off.

thx very much user
i dont bake much but ill try this
lol actually this little plastic bit did get ripped off and im gonna have to find where it came from

im sorry this happened to you OP.

>*hugs from washington*

Instead of trying to pull it out, why not just drive forward and through one of those yards?

Don't feel 2 bad op, had something similar happen a few months back
>be me
>dad just got his 1997 crown vid from the mechanic
>60k miles, almost showroom condition
>take it out to pick up my friend that lives in the middle of no where
>Lots of sharp turns and tight roads but I manage
>pick him up and start heading to the destination
>Were are on a straight road on top of a very small hill, going around 55
>assume the road will continue going straight
>when we get down from the hill, realise that the road will end in a sharp 90 degree turn, and a car is coming in
>evasivemanuvers.exe
>quickly swerve into the grass on the side of the road, braking as hard as I can
>narrowly avoid going head first into a telephone pole, and t-boning a Chevy equinox
>we end up in a ditch, and fucked up part of some guys lawn in the process (not to much)
>leave the scene of the crime
>pull over later to see the damages, just a few scratches
>mfw that turn was called dead man's curve
The vic ended up having issues with the suspension later on, but it's fixed now, although the driver side door has stopped working so there's that.

damn op. counter your fucking blessings because you're lucky there was only bush and bramble to catch you

also because a little bit less understeer and you would have nailed that guardrail end

every moment is a blessing

you got off easy

thank you washingtanon
im feeling better now that its home safe and sound
several reasons actually
>1. i wasn't gonna violate the NAP to save $100
>2. the car was completely stuck on the blackberry with no traction
without the inertia of the moving car i wasn't going any farther through the bush
>3. its hard to see but there is a small creek that i would have to cross thats in a 6 foot deep trench. no way the car would make it through that
its good you were able to drive away
based panther
oh im countering them lol
a few feet to the right and id be in a trench vertical
a few feet past that and id be in the guardrail
i was talking to the guy who drove the wrecker that got me out and he said hed responded to a call at this very spot where someone had done just that and the rail had gone all the way through the windshield and the driver seat of the car and it was a miracle that he wasnt decapitated
also this is my second very minor crash in otherwise very dangerous areas
ye
what is this car

>side note
if you look at pic related
you'll see the exact spot i crashed
its right before the bridge over payne creek where the road meets knope road
i literally crashed where knope meets payne
you can't make this shit up
when i reported this the lady on the phone must have thought i was being funny at first

sc300

darn looks like it's pretty clean other than the accident
what happened to it?

>what is this car
Sc300

...

>driving down narrow backroad
>approach blind corner on hill
>F350 dually appears
>he's half in my lane
>assume he's gonna correct and move over
>he fucking doesnt, swerve slightly and miss him by inches
>get a wheel down on some gravel/dirt on right side of the road, going about 55mph
>swerve across the road and land in a rather steep ditch on the left side

i wasn't the only victim of that ditch, went back to look for a part and found a mirror and a plastic shroud of some sort

bummer
wasn't even your fault