It's another episode of user fucks shit up doing routine maintenance

>it's another episode of user fucks shit up doing routine maintenance

...

i have a OP fucks up story
>removing spark plugs for inspection on new shitbox
>they're all torqued down as hard as possible
>won't remove plug #3
>makes terrible creaking sound
>PO didn't use anti-seize
>on an aluminum head
doesn't spin freely tho, so there's that
just gonna leave it until i get a code I think

>take off wheel to replace tire (motorcycle)
>try to put it back on
>brake pad falls out
>put it back in
>brake pads rubbing against the rotor constantly now
I thought this was supposed to be a simple, hassle-free job

Did you do them while the engine was warm?

>anti-seize on spark plugs
what?

>go to work on day off to put winter tires on
>threw out 2 ones last spring, now realize those 2 were for the front, other 4 don't fit
>decide to service brakes since I now only have to mount and balence 2 winters
>pull off D/F caliper, inside pad is jammed, rotor now has a 1/2" rust groove from improper contact
>service manager needs the bay now and tells me to get my car out
>caliper being difficult, notice dust boot is torn on bottom, seized up
>slap everything back together, pissed now I have to price out new brakes and D/F caliper
>tighten sliders, slowly trying to move caliper, snapped the one of the fuckers
>price out parts, nothing available until tomorrow
>car now on hoist 4 hours for a tire changeover, manager looks at me with disdain as he heads home

Lessons learned: brake service is important even on shitboxes, 3 finger tight will usually do the trick, don't get upset and start rushing

Front or rear? Happens a lot with front since you can’t always squeeze the forks back in to the same exact position you had them prior to removing the wheel

Spark plug threads are usually nickle-coated over steel as an anti-seize prevention in aluminum heads. If old spark plugs are reused some people apply a bit of anti-seize compound as some of the nickle-coating rubs off upon removal thereby increasing the risk they will seize up in the future.

Sparkplugs won't come out when the car's hot user

no but PO probably did
look at the little packets next to the register

one from my earlier days of pretending to be a big boy mechanic:
>sway bar shits the bed, control arms are rusty and their bushings are disintegrating
>decide to replace FR and FL lower control arms at the same time as sway bar
>slap everything on
>tighten bolts while front of the car is still in the air, so load isn't correctly distributed
>bushings are torn within a month
>tfw

Rear

You cant fuck up on maintenance if you dont do any.

>remove fuel rail to inspect injectors
>all squirting fine
>have to disconnect and reattach fuel line to get injectors back into ports
>cross fuel pump relay for prime.
>pump is running
>and running
>smell fuel
>forgot to reattach fuel line
>fuel line pissing all over still warm extractors for about 15 seconds
>whole garage now smells like fuel for a few weeks.

>huff brake cleaner
>"car maintenance"

>it's another episode of simple repair becomes a fucking nightmare because a bolt breaks or the part doesn't fit correctly

>tfw it must be literally impossible for me to not to spill half a quart of oil every time I change it

It usually happens when its just trickling out after the majority already came out and it falls directly down instead of out further.

I even had a piece of cardboard down and still managed to get it everywhere.

My mom hates me for it

I used to do the same until i bought pic related - 15L capacity and the lip/drain spout works great. Done 10+ oil changes in a rental without spilling a drop

at would probably be worth my time to get one of those with a wider mouth. Currently have pic related and the sides are absolutely covered in oil

I got some good ones. i used to drink a lot. i'll give you one, and will give more upon request, probably.

>94 ford f150 5 speed
>freeze plug under the flywheel fails
>dad wont help me cause im a drunk and disappoint
>take cross members, drive shaft, tranny, everything off
>see 3 freeze plugs, easily spot bad one. decide to replace all 3
>get two loose with screw driver, one is really stubborn
>super stubborn
>read on google "drill hole thru center the pry out thru hole
>drilling hole, but seems like the cap is thick
>o well keep drilling
>see oil on drill tip
>heart sinks
>pry off cap to see mysteries. find out its camshaft plug
>i drilled a divot in my camshaft

but, being that it was that old ford inline 6, after the plug was replaced it started like a dream. but that was not the end of my fuck ups that day.

>get everything back together, replace fluids
>go to bleed clutch
>dad says "i'll help you tommorow"
>starting to sober up, need to get a drink
>panic mode
>decide to bleed clutch myself with bleeder gun thing that i don't know how to work
>don't do it right but fuck it i'm getting drunk
>clutch feels funny, wonder if i put something back wrong
>lift up slightly on clutch
>stall truck so hard, the radiator fan hits the radiator, puts a hole in it
>coolant everywhere
>mfw still no alcohol

I use this one, and put it in a cardboard box to catch stray oil. Truthfully, all versions of these oil catchers become an oily mess...it's the nature of an oil change. You just have to minimize it with extra hacks, care and rags

Spilling half a quart is not the problem, it's how and where you spill that your mom hates. Fix that shit

Wtf kind of fan is that?

Just had to make this thread today...
>Doing oil change and fuel filter change earlier
>Get oil change done and move onto the fuel filter
>First time doing one with a banjo bolt and hard line
>Struggle to get the flared fitting off from the bottom of the filter
>Finally get it off, put new filter on, tighten everything down
>Go to prime the pump
>Small fuel leak now at bottom of the filter
>Its threaded properly and as tight as it'll go
Just fuck my shit up.

Here it's almost time to pay a guy to deal with any messy oil problems for me, while I enjoy free wifi and bad coffee.

Prob a clutch fan. I had a buddy that went through 2 radiators before realizing he had a bad motor mount. When he would give it throttle the engine would lurch forward and put some nice holes in the rad.

>add hand guards to the motorcycle
>adjust everything
>now the brake fluid res doesn't sit level
>Tilt the handlebars forward
>readjust everything on the bar
>now the resevor and throttle hits the windshield before full lock
>try to readjust everything again
>nothing works
>fuck around with the windshield and faring
>still hits
>tastefully saw a huge gap into the windshield with a hacksaw
>sand down and polish the cut edge
>Now it doesn't hit
>Realize the handlebar isn't center since I adjusted it
>adjust it center
>bar now locks to the left before where the windshield was
>Big gap in the windshield for no reason.
>plexiglass dust everywhere.

Christ. Your mounts would have to be sloppy as fuck for this to happen, surely

I cant find a better pic, but the fan is a lot closer than you would think.

>trying to change blinker fluid
>never done it before
>turn on car
>smell smoke from the ac