Mummy asks me to pick her up from work

>>"not again Josh, please"

Am I alone in having driven their mothers to work and picking them up?
I did it for like 2 weeks once.

I did deliveries for various restaurants
>Eventually get used to going around in motorcycle gear and full face helmet
>and my earbuds on
>Radio chatter from other runners, edgy kids with pirate radios and directions to my next destination make it hard to make out what people are saying to me
>Every time it takes me a bit to read their lips and process it
>Some times spend the entire night nearly silent, just racing time while keeping up the most hectic of balancing acts
>Eventually switch to a police scanner
>Pay is heavily dependent on client satisfaction and timing
>Start completing all my runs in 5 minutes
I hadn't watched drive at the time, but once I did I realized that for a fleeting moment I was the driver
Eventually I had to quit
My neighbors told on me and a police cruiser kept trying to catch me while heading out

>mummy asks me to pick him up from work
>Me and my descendants become cursed for 1000 years

>yfw this is on the page of the amazon link to a drive jacket
amazon.com/Drive-Jacket-White-Quilted-SELLER◄/dp/B01DPXM4KC

Ayyy

>Watch drive in theaters years ago
>Girlfriend and I went, I was expecting an action movie
>Completely disappointed, remembered very little of the movie
>Rewatched it as Veeky Forums was obsessed with it
>Still don't understand the hype

...

Haha

>>"not again Josh, please"
kek

>be me
>a little socially awkward, not ugly, but have trouble keeping conversations interesting
>watch "Drive" and decide i'm going to change my life
>I will become the driver
>buy solid color henley t shirts, a jean jacket, and skinny jeans
>start college next month
>meet roommate at move in day
>"hey user, i'm stephen, its nice to meet you"
>want to respond but remember i have a new image now
>look directly at him
>letting the silence hang in the air, counting to 10 in my head
>"hey"
>he seemed a little off put but at least im not the one feeling uncomfortable for once

>one week later
>roommate asks if i want to go to a rush party with him, and these two girls he met the night before
>"ok"
>"great, but it's off campus, do you know anyone who could drive us?"
>get really excited... but remember to count to ten first
>.....
>"I drive"
>"ok, thanks bro, it'll be worth it when you see these girls. they are smoking hot. and i've been talking you up to one of them."
>i begin to get nervous, because i've never had much success with girls.
>I think about how driver would handle the situation
>say as little as possible
>be mysterious

>on our way to pick up the girls
>I decide tonights the night i bust out my driving gloves, and my roommate notices
>"cool gloves user"
>i nod and slip in a toothpick

>pull up to the girls house
>roommate gets out to get them
>"you've got a five minute window, anything happens inside that five minutes, im yours. anything happens outside of that and your on your own. understand?"
>this is probably the single longest thing i've said to him at this point, he seems surprised
>"uh.. sure.. it wont take long"
>i take off my watch and put it on the steering wheel

>the girls get to the car and he wasn't lying, they were super hot. they were also super drunk already
>"wow stephen, you werent lying about him, he's a cute one"
>i begin to get a little nervous. my hands are sweaty as fuck from my gloves, and im wearing my quilted racing jacket (no scorpion unfortunately) over my jean jacket
>remember the driver doesn't have to respond to social cues
>meet them with silence
>stephen begins to look nervous for me
>".....what's the job?"
>"uhh... the party is a few miles away... thanks again for driving"
>turn on my cb police scanner and pull out of the driveway

>the girls are now really getting into it
>they think im pretty cool, the strong silent thing is working
>girl in the backseat is touching my chest from behind
>"youre really quiet *giggle* i can't wait to loosen you up a little tonight..." she winks
>im panicking now, social anxiety is setting in
>decide to show off a little, take some turns at high speeds
>"holy shit user SLOW DOWN" stephen yells
>but the girls are liking it, laughing as they are thrown around the back seat.
>decide i'm going to cuck my roommate as the driver,
>but i need more time to show off my driving skills, and the trip is almost over
>"you wanna see somethin?"
>the girls are confused but too drunk to really respond affirmatively
>take the scenic route

>about 20 minutes later and it's pretty clear i've gotten us lost
>roommate is silently fuming
>"user, where the fuck are we. we should've been there fifteen minutes ago"
>silent
>the girls are quiet now too
>the only sound is Tick of the Clock by Chromatics playing on repeat, over my police scanner, as it has for the entire trip
>...."you don't need to know the route"
>roommate is pissed and begins looking up directions on his phone
>one of the girls has to pee, she asks to pull over
>i say the five minutes line again, i didn't know what else to say
>my roommate by now has decided i am an autist
>girls step out of the car, roommate does too
>I stay in the car, but i hear them all laughing.
>I think they are probably laughing at me
>grip my steering wheel and floor it, tires screeching
>hear my roommate yell "WHAT THE FUCK user"
>go back to the dorm and begin filling out roommate transfer request

ahahahaahahha

top kek

youtu.be/X5ypgeMUGmI

>three eighteenTEE

delightful

Not bad

>Eva is going in to labour
>QUICK RYAN, IT'S TIME! I NEED YOU TO DRIVE ME TO THE HOSPITAL
>Ryan looks at her, silent and dead eyed
>Broods for a minute
>Gets his scorpion jacket
>"RYAN THIS ISN'T THE TIME FOR THAT"
>He stares at her and points menacingly
>Goes and retrieves his leather gloves
>"HURRY UP RYAN"
>Finally arrives and gets in the car
>Sits motionless
>"WHY ARENT YOU DRIVING RYAN THIS IS SERIOUS"
>He squints his eyes
>80's neon pop plays quietly over. radio
>She begins to scream in pain as a small autist kicks her from the inside
>He suddenly revs the engine to max and flies away from their house
>"SLOW DOWN RYAN, I DONT WANT TO CRASH NOW OF ALL TIMES"
>He arrives at the hospital in minutes
>Stops outside the the emergency entrance and stares at a neon sign
>"You've got 5 minutes. Anything happens in that five minutes and I'm yours. No matter what. Anything a minute on either side of that and you're on your own. I don't sit in while you're running it down. I don't carry a gun. I drive."
>Eva has already left the car
>Ryan doesn't follow
>He sits in the car for the entire delivery
>Eva returns 12 hours later will a baby
>"Look Ryan, it's your son"
>"I dont like him"
>Real hero
>And a real human being
>Drapes a small scorpion jacket over his autistspawn

...

Excellent post, haven’t even seen the movie but I feel like I have now

That is so damn good, you absolute legend. Capped.

this is my favorite drive post

I want to drive you through the night, and down the hills