When you're unemployed but suddenly excitedly searching bulk distributors...

SniperGod
SniperGod

When you're unemployed but suddenly excitedly searching bulk distributors because you had an awesome business idea for your local weed store.

RumChicken
RumChicken

What's the idea user :^)

VisualMaster
VisualMaster

I just thought of a great thing to sell to/through local businesses!
just need to find a distributor!
make pitch
local businesses spend 5 minutes locating your distributor and cutting out the middleman
tfw you're the useless middleman

Evil_kitten
Evil_kitten

Nope, I'm not making any money off it. Don't wanna. If my weed store remembers me as a guy who made the owner a little bit of extra money, that's more than reward enough.

There's just an awesome product I know about (don't want to talk about it, whole premise is it's a secret) that would really set her shop apart. She runs a really cool dispensary type place that's right down the block from me. It's like a five minute walk so I don't want this place to go out of business.

Turns out it's super viable, we can get the item for next to nothing, and packaging will make it great. It's a totally untapped market. Not a major one, I don't think I'm inventing Facebook over here. I just know a neat little thing that she could sell and improve her word of mouth business (she gets a lot cool traffic and she relies on word of mouth). Imagine being the first bait shop with a floatie key chain. I'm not inventing the floatie keychain, just telling her that they exist and that they'd be great for business.

haveahappyday
haveahappyday

her shop
her
kek'd

best of luck.
Watch out for Trump and Sessions, they plan on shutting weed stores down.

Gigastrength
Gigastrength

Okay, so here's the thing. $500 gets us enough units to sell for $4000 full price. She should do some giveaways, account for losing and replacements, sale prices and freebies. I bet we could clear $2000. She can afford to charge high prices because she gives away weed for every $10 spent, so people expect a lot of markup. This markup isn't even slightly outrageous.

So our probably outcome is $500 investment, $1500-$2500 return plus new customers. Fuck, I'd put up the money myself, as long as I actually ordered the product. Absolute worst case scenario? She shuts down, moves to Mexico and I'm out $500 bucks. Big fucking whoop, I can afford $500 to have some fun with a local business.

Best case scenario? I invest the full amount, I get my $500 back and she probably gives me extra weed or something. No scheme or anything, she runs the perfect shop and I want more people to have this item since I really like it.

TurtleCat
TurtleCat

Watch out for Trump and Sessions, they plan on shutting weed stores down.

My response:

Holy shit. Sean Spicer came into my room to bring me a plate of chicken nuggets and I literally screamed at him and hit the plate of chicken nuggets out of his hand. He started yelling and swearing at me and I slammed the door on him. I’m so distressed right now I don’t know what to do. I didn’t mean to do that to Spicy Sean but I’m literally in shock from the briefing. I feel like I’m going to explode. Why the fucking fuck is Trump enforcing marijuana laws? This can’t be happening. I’m having a fucking breakdown. I don’t want to believe I can't smoke weed e'ry day. I want sour diesel at $20 an eighth. I want to smoke weed all day and watch classic Simpsons I cannot fucking deal with this right now. It wasn’t supposed to be like this, I thought he was going to leave it to the states???? This is so fucked.

her shop

Dude, normally I'd be wary, but she honestly runs a great operation that could end up doing very well. She's in the world's best location and she's a head shop with a loophole to sell weed in a town without recreational. She'll do well.

Also, yeah, I'm worried about cracking down on recreational, but I have a million ways to fall back. I'm already getting a real job, this is just a fine little side idea. I'm hoping a couple people in Trump's inner circle get together and decide that if a Republican House, Senate, Judiciary, and President actually pass through a bill that lets states legalize, they're gonna turn green voters red for generations. All these young Gen Z people or whatever who are sick of all this shit and just want Trump to be a gentle memedaddy? They want legal weed. That's the one point they have against Trump, and Trump himself is still ambiguous. (cont)

VisualMaster
VisualMaster

(cont)

If he flips on this and gives us legal weed, welcome to a young generation fipped to Republican and destroying the generational shift. We're talking red voters in a generation to savvy to be swayed by old media. Bannon or Priebus or even that little (((son-in-law))) must understand old abortion/Christian voters will vote red and turn out no matter what. Go green and you'll win an entire demographic and show that cool first general election Obama and the dems acted like they cared about weed, then they laughed and did nothing. Then Trump and his Republicans came along and gave you a states' rights response and state-legalized weed. Democrats couldn't recover.

PurpleCharger
PurpleCharger

Edit: Whoops. I ran the conservative cheap price, I got $3000/$6000. That's 200 units, for which I priced that $500. $4000 would be a bad job for us on this project, honestly. She is gonna give me so much free weed.

For real though, I have real jobs I'm in the process of securing right now. My degrees mean I'm always in demand, I'm just having fun with this shop while I get back into shape and actually finish unpacking and getting furniture. This is the most fun I've had since college, I honestly feel like I'm businessing and it's all helping out a cool store and a cool product.

BunnyJinx
BunnyJinx

Trump doesn't matter. The man is very old, he'll be dead of old age long before kids shift his way.

also he isn't doing anything, he's threatening to do something and then expecting kids to lick his ass if he doesn't do it. Classic bullying Trump behavior, it's how he negotiates. I doubt America's youth are all dumb enough to fall for it. You clearly are though.

Supergrass
Supergrass

Sweet, whatever. It'll suck for me, but all the better to do this project and have her give me an ounce of free medical. I'm not looking to become a dispensary promoter/solution-finder as a career. I'm throwing away what I would have spent on some stupid car-tow bullshit or whatever so I can hopefully do something fun.

Even if she doesn't give a shit and tells me to fuck off (very unlikely), she'll probably be a little generous with the grams that day because I put in the effort and she likes my girlfriend and me.

Dude, all the worst case scenarios end up with me getting free weed. This'll take, like, a month to play out.

And don't get me wrong, I don't really trust Trump on weed. I trust that his team of advisers see it would be an absolutely genius move that would knock the dentures out of the DNC. Flawless victory, country fucking loves it. Someone on his team sees that.

And if it doesn't, I'm getting at least half an ounce of some pretty good shit (we can talk details if you guys wanna be snobs). Trump can shut down the whole system, I just need a little time and I'm prepped for prohibition for quite a while. He doesn't give me time? I'm out money I would have spent on, I dunno, some stupid electronic bullshit I don't even use? Maybe some extra furniture and a gift for someone? Dunno why you're stepping on me, this is the equivalent of building trains in my basement.

Soft_member
Soft_member

I think you're doing a fine thing with helping a friend with business.

and all that will happen if the DNC gets knocked out is conservatives will switch sides again, or a new split will come up on different ideological lines. The GOP can't keep doing what it's doing, it's losing presidential elections regularly. They still have the electoral college but that's one solid loss away from being gone. The writing's on the wall for them. Weed, hipsters and Hispanics are our future. They'll get on board when they have to.

Burnblaze
Burnblaze

I'm not holding my breath, but I'm saying if Republicans did try to attract weed voters it would probably work and it sure as hell wouldn't be the craziest thing to happen in the past twelve months. I'm actually kind of nervous, but even if it doesn't work out I've found a fun hobby I can apply to different small businesses. I even knew a guy who used to do this kind of thing, maybe he'll have pointers.

Deadlyinx
Deadlyinx

Holy shit, that place's stuff is so good it made me develop a business plan. Like, I have so much research and a full speech of how I'd present it. I fixed some errors in my earlier estimates, but we could easily do $3000 if we had brisk sales with a new item. That includes doing a lot of giveaways or being used to up the ante to a larger dollar amount. We'll probably give away a lot of merch, that's what I'm looking at $1500 to $2500 profit unless they end up being pretty popular. If they're as popular as it would be as, say, selling bagels in the shop (holy shit they should do that I need a fucking hot bagel!, still, not a pretzel level good, then that level of sales would be $3000. If they're like a huge fucking hit for some reason (people love the packaging or the product for some of a few potential reasons), we could go over $4000. If we hit five thousand watch out, we have a murderous plant involved.

TreeEater
TreeEater

that place's stuff is so good it made me develop a business plan.
kek

buddy, weed shop owners dabble in millions of dollars worth of sales. Tons of businesses do. Making an extra $4k- while not terrible- isn't that big a deal.

like you finding a penny on the street, you might bend down and pick it up if it's not a bother, but you sure aren't going to write up a business plan and pitch it to people about HOW you're going to pick up the penny.

I love your enthusiasm though.

Sharpcharm
Sharpcharm

Also man, combine a head rush from vaping an ecigarette with nicotine with the body high from a good indica? Every head hit I get on my vape (I'm a fag, I know, I don't do it in public and only my girlfriend knows) when I do this indica makes me feel like I'm having a seizure, but in a pleasant way.

Oh god I hope this won't kill my brain. This is cool, right? Also, general biz/weed thread? or whatever you want to do with this. Insult my grammar, go for it. I'mma stick around until I finish making my dessert.

-Degenerate Consulting

eGremlin
eGremlin

This is about as small an operation as a weed shop can be. It is a hole in the wall that exists because of a loophole. It's not quite sketchy but it's customers have to be kind of hip.

The sales are only for first 200 units, so if it goes well we can scale up on these pieces. The margins seem great but all things considered it's just on the edge of fair (this place is pretty overpriced, they outright ask you if you want to pay more because they give out a gram every $10).

The real value is word of mouth. This product is genuinely cool. We're gonna give out doubles in hopes people will share with a friend or at least brag to a friend about. This is a neat little thing and will be great word of mouth. If we do lots of business hell yeah we'll buy a fuckton of these items, it'll be even cheaper. These margins are going to be fucking sick and it's going to be an awesome advertisement for the place. The packaging options I have will blow your fucking mind. I am just starting to understand how much you can do with packaging. This tool is going to get you to bring a friend to the shop (by the way, if you bring a friend to the shop you get a free hand-rolled, they get cigarette holder but for joints, plus a free hand rolled, plus I mean c'mon some free weed with the grinder or bong or dabberer they bought. Place is a fucking golden opportunity. They need crazy margins to stay in business, this fits that perfectly. And it means more people learn about a neat tool.

Crazy_Nice
Crazy_Nice

I mean it's in the very professionally finished basement of a small two story house, in an area that used to be residential. Cheap convert. On top of them? A sketchy business, imagine a liquor store or a pawn shop. Something a little gross. Like I know $4K isn't a lot, but dude: it's an independent side mission that I basically do myself. I get all the stuff, I'll make my girlfriend and and me package it while we watch King of the Hill, the store owner just has to set a price and put it on her shelves. She's in need of cool shelf content and she's about to redo her entire inventory, so this is a perfect little thing.

This is more of a small head shop, not a weed shop. They are a head shop that gives you weed, but it is primarily a head shop and is 95% dedicated to maintaining the image that it is primarily a head shop. And it is tiny. It's people-sized, but it's the type of nook a gnome would design. Very much in a weird half-basement, smallish alchemy shop. I could fucking gush, that's why I'm so enthusiastic. I love this place.

I ingratiate myself with the operator of a business that makes it's primary trade handing out free weed. I don't care if it's small potatoes, the money comes at no effort or cost to her and I get my investment back (no profits!) and she almost certainly gives me half an ounce for my effort. Half an ounce and the satisfaction of a tiny business idea succeeding? That's like nailing Jaguar.

Also now there's some fucking web extension that makes it so you can't right click and save image files on a search? Fuck this future.

iluvmen
iluvmen

Anyway man, this whole thing feels so legit. It's like getting published in a magazine. She uses my business idea in an underground week speakeasy and maybe people like my idea? That'd be such a confidence boost. That would be my streetcred. Right now my streetcred is successful shitposting on rapgenius. Seems good to me.

But I just made Chex and honey with yogurt in milk, so peace.

likme
likme

Have a good night, Kelly

hairygrape
hairygrape

Whoops, "underground weed speakeasy." It's kinda cool. But a previous business negotiation is kicking in in a major way so I can't really communicate so thoroughly. Please talk about anything related that interests you, I love hearing about small business interactions or stuff about local-scale weed business.

Lol captcha was images of trees.

Sharpcharm
Sharpcharm

Man, these Chex ads are getting weird.

Sir_Gallonhead
Sir_Gallonhead

Coming down I guess I was overenthusiastic, but it's still kinda cool I guess.

Poker_Star
Poker_Star

when ur a neet making two grands a week from ur computer while your acquaintances live the corporate life and they look down on you thinking that your life a shit because you do not talk about your income but secretly you know that it is their lives that are fucked up and you smile interiorly.

Feelsgoodmang.png