Is there such a thing as "shitbox magic"?

Is there such a thing as "shitbox magic"?

Yes, I've owned two. A 95 Escort and a 99 Lumina.
You can't tell when or where they will come into your life, however, so you can't intentionally buy one.

Is it true "shitbox" is another word for "GODMACHINE"?

Yup, a 1995 Tercel, 4 speed manual, actually made in Japan and not Mexico or Canada.

Thing is so reliable, so fun to chuck around, easy on gas, peppy, I love it.

It weighs 1950 pounds! shit is lighter than my 2 seater MR2.

>4 speed manual

Is it true that four speed more speed?

No.
Plenty of shitboxes are just shitty cars that will make your life miserable.
But once in a blue moon you will get that stanky beater that will somehow never let you down despite the horrendous abuse that has been heaped upon it.
That is Shitbox Magic.

I bought a car that initially made my life miserable but eventually, after enough money and time spent, has turned into a car that I frequently use to make 3hr+ road trips

yeah mate, going fast in a fast car is fuckin boring sometimes but working a busted up 4cyl like a stolen horse just to go the speed limit is exciting

I took a salvage title beater from Utah to Alaska and back and all I had to do was put new(ish) tires on it and top off the transmission fluid every two weeks.

Yeah, with the 4 speed, it's miserable on highways, tops out at 90 mph lol. A 5 speed would be godsend.

Definitely.

my 99 citroen berlingo, the suspension at the front sags and it has the turning radius of an aircraft carrier, and aside from pissing away coolant, the engine is indestructible

You can tell that this guy hasn't owned many shitboxs.

requesting the geo metro copypasta

no its a lie

Yes!

My family and I have been gifted with numerous shitboxes that will never break down on the road despite being old used up vehicles.

Cavaliers, dodge caravans, old buicks, mustangs, malibus, volkswagens.

Granted they only last about 4-5 years or so before catastrophic failures. Shitbox magic does happen.

Only if you know how to wrench.

I've got 4 cars in my driveway, 3 of which are pretty nice in my opinion, but the shitbox magic is absolutely real.

There's a kind of unpredictability to owning an absolute shit box that makes them...less boring.
If you've got a nearly new Camry you know it'll start, run and stop every day.
But with a clapped out beater that certainty isn't there. You never know if it's going to last another year or die tomorrow, so every time it starts and runs it's like winning a little prize.
You're proud of it for not breaking down on the way to the grocery store. You're excited when you hit a pot hole and the radio starts working again.
You're expecting it to go shit out at any time, so every moment it works feels amazing.

Reliable shitbox = GOAT cars
Unreliable shitbox = actually shit

Every panda 4x4

cars that can get shitbox magic
any jap car
any korrean kar
mid90s and older germans
no idea about USDM, since yuropoor
even cheaper french cars can get shitto-magic

italian cars dont have shitbox magic. they either run good, or they are utter shit. same goes for british cars.
>tfw when im drooling over the idea of buying a neat 2008+ Alfa Romeo 2.4 td manual and chiptune it because for the past several days i guess some braincells have been dislodged up my arse

USDM Shitbox Magic usually involves our trucks and basic sedans, really anything that was designed to be sold as a fleet vehicle.
Our small cars are mostly lacking in Shitbox Magic, hence why we tend to just rebadge Japanese cars. Notable exceptions were the USDM Ford Escort (now teetering on extinction since they were so popular as beaters) and s-series Saturns.

Cavalier is Americas shitbox champion

YES! My dad bought his '91 Dodge Spirit off my sisters' friends' mother 15 years ago for $100 and since then its needed nothing but oil changes and a new muffler for $200, when the OEM muffler rusted out and fell off the car. It runs like a top and over the years I put aftermarket fog lights in the lower bumper to replace the OEM lights that had long since been lost to road gravel and for my Dad's birthday I got him a JVC stereo to replace the OEM radio that shit the bed. The odometer quit working at 135,000 miles but I'd say at has at least twice that mileage now.

Can confirm. My family had an Oldsmobile Firenza and a Cadillac Cimarron (both GM pallet-swaps of the Cavalier platform)