7 series E38

>change oil every 10k miles
>fix some cheap electrical gremlin every 3 months
WOW so much upkeep lmao

V12 is good, V12 is great
Grab your wallet boi and prepare to get raped

The worst part of it is doing the spark plugs

Nonsense, spark plugs are fine if you still have the original "tool" in the trunk tool box. That shit really helps a fuckton.
Only the driver side bank rearmost plug is a bitch, both on the M70 and M73. I'd even wager it's a bit worse on the M73 as you can remove the battery + cable post on the M70 and a piece from the intake manifold from the rear, the manifolds are symmetric you see.
Tightening them is a fucking nightmare thought, I probably overtightened the last one on my M73 as it gave out this nice screech, almost shat my pants there. Here's hoping it's still fine because fuck me trying to re-thread that fucking hole.

dude. just leave it out.
A V12 uses way too much fuel anyway and do you really need all that power?
2 or 4 working cylinders less gives you the power of a V10 or V8, which is still plenty. And it's not as thirsty.

>90s 7 series
>low upkeep

fucking kek get a load of this guy

But muh V12. Honestly, I am hoping it was just the spark plug washer going crunch and nothing else. it came out easy and went back in easy too. I put about 2.5k on it after that and haven't noticed it blowing past the threads either, so I am hopefully okay.

They aren't that expensive to be honest, you can maintain one with a minimum wage job, given that you don't take it to a shop, forego all other worldly possessions and dedicate your life to the 7.

>90s 7 series owner

you can't make this shit up

Also 80's 7 series

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>civic owner doesnt know

how the fuck does that monster look photoshopped but obviously real at the same time

Probably because the cupholders are shit and I have to J-J-JAM IT IN proper if I want anything in them.
That and the contrast between the light can and the beautiful dark interior of the 7.

literally sat here for a couple minutes staring at it, but sidenote slap a manual in that thing i cant imagine how shitty the shifts are in that

While the thought of a manual V12 is always exciting, a true luxury car should be automatic.
It's also quite smooth for a 20+ year old car. Almost the same feeling my E60 has

yeah youre not wrong good on you having the v12, got the manual for my e46 330 track car and the dct for my f10 always think about how fun it would be in standard but then i remember how much faster my dct is

i want one but bmw reliability is what it is.
All of them are fucked by slavs and boyracers anyways, but a clean 735i would be sweet.

7's are rarely fucked over by boyracers. SLavs are all about that 5er game, so the 7 series are usually relatively unabused. There is the occasional me though who does burnouts, goes through turns sideways and does hard accelerations till 250kmh almost daily with a 2 ton V12 barge.
Thus far it has been surprisingly "reliable". Most of the shit in my car are factory originals, so things are starting to fail bit by bit. Mostly just regular service items like distributors, the alternator and such. Electronics are mostly fine aside for the phone display being fucked from the cold.

depends where you live around the maryland pennsylvania and west virginia tristate area they arent really riced out or driven to the ground as much as youd think more just rust damage from salting roads. Just gotta look diligently and patiently like for example found a e36 m3 turbo build for $5000 but man the guy sank like 13k into modding it no expense spared garret gt35r custom built titanium down pipes and exhaust, full cage that kept back seat availability, custom manifold built by the guy (owned a really nice machining and fab shop), full forged internals, polished and ported head, mex injection you name it he had it. If i remember right he was just about to have a baby and he needed a practical car plus i think he was strapped for money from just buying a house as well. Almost bought it but it i had no space or use for it plus i dont really like buying already built cars alot of the fun is doing the research and work yourself customizing the build the way you want it.

just realized the downpipes couldnt of been titanium gets too hot i know everything after them were titanium cause when i went to see the car he made a big deal of the weight savings like that the exhaust weighed 40 lbs less than stock

Don't they use Titanium in like jet engines and such shit because it has a high melting point?

Well it's difficult to find a good one. Mostly owned by slavs who will never do maintenance. 728 and 740 get chopped up because E36 is the boyracers and driftbabbies holy grail so 2.8 and 4.4 is in high demand.
Roads are absolute shit and suspensions are fucked or barely holding together. Rust is also a big problem as the roads here in eastern europe have a thick layer of salt during winter. Electrics are a nightmare as many cars have been in lithuania at some point where the repairs are questionable to say the least. Pretty much every bmw will have its odometer rolled back at some point at least once.
There are good looking examples for a reasonable price, but most of the time they have layer of bondo covering rust, accident history, rolled back odometers and faked service history(yes thats a thing in eastern europe)
From what i see that the really good E38s dont get sold that often because the owners know the actual value of the car.
pic related a fine example of a e38

titanium unlike steel is flammable when it reaches high temperatures has something to due with the added heat from the metal oxidizing

>living in bumfuck nowhere slavland
Shit son, you have it rough as fuck then, I'm sorry.
That being said, your best bet is to get one of those prized examples then, you know that will be expensive and probably more expensive than what most would be willing to shell out for a 20 year old barge.

Also, you can't roll back the odo of a 7 series, even if you fuck around with the computers, this small cross lights up on the display to notify that shit's fucked.

>can't roll back the odo of a 7 series
you are seriously underestimating eastern european car dealers. They will roll back anything thats older than 5 years without leaving a trace and present you a legit looking service history from germany with signatures and stamps thats 100% fake when actually the car has spent 15 years in lithuania driven by vasilij, has had 2 engine swaps and 3 transmissons and probably been totalled at some point. The good cars often get exported to the west.

Aside for like an OBD fuckery device, how do you even cheat a digital display odo?
I can't come up with anything aside for reprogramming the whole damn thing.

Can confirm what Boris here said. I am from Romania so I live close to Lithuania, Ukraine, Bulgaria and the Motherland.

Forged service histories are a common thing, 95% of cars have rolled back mileage, many have been totaled and shadily repaired then sold as good as new with no mention of the accident, not even in records. And I'm not even talking private owners, official car dealerships have been caught rolling back kms and forging documents. They get sued out of their asses, but most people don't really inspect the cars when they buy them so one lawsuit every 10000 customers is not that bad.

Forged documents are a real thing here, everything from insurance to owner title.

Also, a friend of mine bought an E39 520d 3 years ago. He does a lot of tinkering on his car and he found out gradually that the car was initially RHD and converted to LHD, it had 176.000kms rolled back and that the original owner was some polish mobster. He paid 2.300 euros for it and invested about 1000 more in repairs so he got a bretty gud deal out of it.

A yeah, one more thing...all the rolled back cars have 187.000km or 244.000km, because that's the psychological point at which most people will buy cars. It doesn't matter the age of the car or the condition, they all wont buy cars that have over 187.000km. So everybody just rolls back kms.

Thank god the autistic inspections here which also flag down the mileage of your car. There is just no way you could reasonably roll back the odo without owning the car for like 10 years and just like slowing it down, at which point it becomes quite stupid.

A yeah, you can easily bribe your way out of technical inspection, and you can have a 100% legal MOT without even turning up at the station, if you leave enough money on the table.

Also, forged inspection papers are also quite common, along with insurance. The titles can be forged aswell, but you might aswell just register your car with Bulgaria plates because why not.

Sveiks!

Yep, thats how these things work. I have read about dealers getting caught selling flood and fire damaged cars aswell.
Our yearly inspection includes the odometer reading which is public info on the internet so you can see the km per year. Knew a guy with a D2 S8 who did 30k kms a year and every year before the inspection he would roll 20k back and it looks legit when its time to sell because 10k a year is the median here.
Im not a slav tho dont ever call me boris

>Im not a slav tho
Sure thing vasily

E23, 32 or 38, the ultimate old school 7 showoff.
For me, it's the E32. It was THE car that kicked Benz in the balls and showed the world that BMW can make luxury at least as well as the rest and that luxury doesn't have to be a barge that only goes in a straight line.