/ink/ - Splatoon General

can you fill me with love?

he died for our sins

the same thing kier does whenever he has a hole that needs filling.

its okay

I believe in you

if you let me

B-but he's mad at me

First for green woomies are the best

find pictures of spaghettis with their nipples out and send them to him.
voila.

He used to send me those all the time ;;

So are green spaghetti's

why does ink get gay as fuck at night? is it really just k**r luring the homos out?

he's eating some salmonid baby curry

i like you

Spaghetti > Woomy
Marie > Callie > Marina > Pearl
Ice Cream > Cake
Ketchup > Mayo
Flight > Invisibility
Over > Under

clear woomies

Remember not to watch your woomy when she lays her eggs! Woomies are really shy!

NA splatfest never

send him dick

i mean i'm here almost 24/7
people just don't pay attention unless Kier's doing it

Absolutely not

Kier pls ;

Never quote me again.

whats wrong with a little green sketti?

what the fuck, this picture is adorable

now i feel lonely, i wanna sleep with my woomy like this...

always

...

okay so ive been playing sploon 2 on and off since it was released and

what's all this about pasta

Lonely without kier-kun

girls say "woomy"
boys say "yebbie", but it can also be heart as "spaghetti"

>tfw helping crush with her homework and can't draw
Oneitis sucks, I wanna draw cute woomies studying.

pearl
feelings?

>picking 3dpd over woomies
user, I...

beta

>the game put Yogo and I together in the lobby
I wonder if it's a sign

It is pretty beta, but we had sex with her dressed as 2B I'm kinda stuck here.

she should watch marie's stupid show about studying

>had sex
>she's still not your girlfriend
user, you're better off just staying home. She's not into you

You're probably right user. I'm gonna go home and draw squids.

>interacting with crush
>on Veeky Forums
pick one

what if you were watching the inkopolis news and pearl and marina got into a serious, heated argument and marina got up and sunk her teeth into pearl's giant swelled fluid-filled head while pearl shrieked and convulsed and the cameras cut off

No, I don't think she has any

I'm saying this to help you bro
Has she ever contacted you for anything that doesn't result in you helping her? Yes sex counts. Has she introduced you to her friends or roommate? Does she accept favors like having dinner paid for her but never offers a similar thing for you? Does she say words like love but doesn't mean it? Does she keep you around even when she has a boyfriend? You might be taken advantage of dude, play splatoon and don't get played by some skank.

You can do it! Thanks for taking my request.

>dominate entire match
>personally go 21-2 until overtime
>during overtime chucklefuks on my team decide to try and spawncamp the one single person in their spawn while the other three rape our asshole and take the lead

I want you people to HANG YOURSELVES

GOD DAMMIT

best RNG weapon

>tfw user got tricked into doing some cosplay sluts homework just because she fucked him
his woomy is probably disappointed

yo this is amazing

what if your woomy could tell when you were unhappy and always tried to make you smile by giving you drawings

i would give her a big hug and tell her im okay and then take her out for her favorite meal

what if your woomy's drawings were bad and you couldn't tell what they were supposed to be, but she asks for your honest opinion?

I would do homework in exchange for fucking a reasonably attractive girl dressed as 2B in a heartbeat. I test in the 99th percentile and am a professional writer, accepting all offers.

I don't think user got played unless he played himself by getting attached when he shouldn't have or does play himself from here.

holy shit guys 1 more fucker to go wish me luck

Channel my inner /ic/ and be a rude asshole about it

>I test in the 99th percentile and am a professional writer, accepting all offers.

I would tell her that her drawings were pretty good, and then focus on complimenting her on other things instead so that she could feel proud of other things and wouldn't lean entirely on drawing.

And of course I'd still put her drawings on the fridge!

;_; b-bro... u a real ass homie no homo

thaknk

>glittering hopeful eyes
>in expectation of your answer
>pat your squids head and tell it's a nice drawing
>asks if you recognize what is drawn
>divert the question by going out to grab a bite together

what if you saw Marie sitting at a cafe all alone and kept checking her phone and looked more sad each time she did

youtube.com/watch?v=YpugK0RpEaU
>woomies, weed and weather

I'd ask her where Callie is and go to her, instead of sitting with washed up grandma over here.

Callie IS best girl after all.

fantasy answer: offer her some cake and ask if she is okay, leading to her falling in love with me, coming to live with me, finally providing my woomy with a mother figure, and we can live happily ever after and also fuck

real answer: awkwardly keep looking over at her thinking about the fantasy answer in my head while avoiding eye contact, and then going home to jerk off

I can't take this fucking game anymore. I'm seriously getting a fucking headache from being let down by my team

How the fuck do I get a 7/1 K/D ratio and still lose? Because any time I die all hell breaks loose because apparently the way Splatoon's matchmaking works, if it thinks you're better than the other team they'll just pair you with shitters to balance it out and expect you to do all the fucking work

I'm going to bed before I throw my controller through my window

Give her some eggs.

ask the barista to play Maritime Memory over the sound system

he literally called her his oneitis

just stop playing solo queue after you get to A

Nah, you were really easy to work with. I'd do another one in the future.
>thinking of getting a motorcycle license
>but too pussy to drive it daily
Custom helmet? Bike decals/graphics? Probably going to be expensive as fuck though.

Fair enough. But he can still break even, so to speak, if he calls it off now or makes a move o push it further (and calls it off if she's not interested)

holy shit that'd be so tight

what if you were with your woomy and you saw Callie in the street and your woomy just ran right up to her and started talking to her and asking her things and physically touching her and callie was clearly annoyed and possibly hung over but was trying to be nice

Motherfucker I am TIRED, I don't need these kind of stressful hypotheticals right now

I buy them both Ice Cream or some shit, happy?

>Possibly hung over
Definitely the eggs.

what if callie was clearly very intoxicated and said rude, sexual things and called your woomy a little bitch and then threw up on the ground

R.I.P toast

I'll dump my woomy and mary Callie instead

if the eggs squids eat come from salmon, wouldn't that technically make their omelettes caviar?
would woomies even eat omelettes?

would not intervene
would pull out recording device and record everything that happens

Does she draw them every time you're sad?

>tfw you will never share a shwaffle with a cute sghetti

toast got kicked not banned, also unban dot and ban toast

I would have a lot of drawings...

oh that's really fucking cute

Try yaoi manga.

you just gotta believe, bro

tfw no woomys irl to give you pure, genuine smiles

of course they'd eat omelettes
they probably eat all sorts of shit

WELL?

why eggs

its gotta be cold blooded

Smoothest way to make get-to-know with a girl you like, user, but it only work if she eats all the eggs

Oh, I didn't notice I maxed out a weapon.

I never actually ever did that in S1.

>max turf
>no flag
lol

>raw
lmoa