/lozg/ - The Legend of Zelda General

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I won't believe you until I hear details about how you're going to achieve this
>Are you going to breed a super seal for her?
>Are you going to become the undisputed Sand Seal racing Champion?
>Will you solve all her problems for her?
Unlike Link she won't be forgiving of you breaking her town's laws by sneaking in so you can expect a beating and maybe a few days of ice harvesting

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I'm up, Lady Nabooru

Nah

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>born and raised in Gerudo Town
>attend the mandatory lessons and training
>leave town to find man
>successfully find one and marry him
>???
>???
>kid born and raised in Gerudo Town

Quick! You want to farm something that isn't hearty durians, where do you go?

Faron - mighty bananas
Lover's Pond - Hearty Turnips (giant and regular)
Fairy Fountains - Endura carrots
Zra's Domain - those speed things

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I hope the DLC is just cutscenes of Zelda and Urbosa having girl talk

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There might be a cutscene of that but the majority of her female interaction will be with Riju and Paya neither of whom are anywhere near as well versed about voe as Urbosa

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The end

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So seeing as so many characters carry their swords resting on their ass crack why does Link choose the more impractical sword slung behind his back

So, about to play Breath of the Wild for the first time.

My first Zelda since I was a kid and playing Ocarina of time, what am I in for?

Nothing like OoT, that's for sure

Fun.
Be sure to go in completely blind

I think I would be terrified if a Gerudo asked me this

they seem to be able to control their emotions when they get rejected although they'll drown their sorrows in a bottle afterwards. That is unless you're dealing with Risa

Yeah, I've not seen anything but some pre-release trailers and some small clips at release

Zelda in denial about her feelings is best Zelda

Artist name or site

wait...how is Mipha a princess if she's part of hyrule

my question is why the Gerudo have Chiefs not Queens and why the Hylian royal family aren't emperors instead of kings

The Zora royal family were stripped of their authority but got to keep their titles as part of their subjugation by the Hyrulian Empire

>Keep your meaningless titles. In the end, you shall all bend the knee before me.

>yfw the Champions are forever remembered for their sacrifice but Link is totally forgotten by Hylians

As it should be.
He will just reincarnate anyways.

is that supposed to be Link? Why's he got a towel across his chest?

the only reason Hylians are the big dogs is because they had the largest population, the means to feed them and the wealth to educate them. Them being supported by claims of being the chosen people and the technological acumen of the Sheikah who also likely act as their secret police just soldifies them as top of the pile.

The Goron are too placid to ever be a threat to Hylian dominance. The Gerudo can't support any significant expansion because it'd wind up outstripping their resources plus they're dependent on Hylians for mates. The Sheikah make themselves subservient for religious reasons. The Rito don't seem very ambitious and the Zora are restricted to the waters of Hyrule

>cold metal directly touching titties
Do girls really do this?

>The Rito don't seem very ambitious
Realistically, why aren't Ritos more dominant? Not saying they should be above Hylians but there's nothing really stopping them either.

There's probably a cloth buffer. And no.

Someone said they had short lifespans but whilst I haven't talked to every Rito I haven't seen anything supporting that assertion

plate armor isn't that necessary these days

The Zora King is a vassal of the King of Hyrule, obviously

Hylians are literally the gods' chosen people, ruling by divine right. It's only natural that they're in charge

I wonder how relationships will change now Zelda is coming to them asking for support to recreate her monarchy. I doubt they'll agree to being as subservient as they were previously. Wouldn't surprise me if there were a permanent contingent of the other races at Hyrule Castle vying for greater and greater freedoms and favour for their people

They're Hylia's chosen people. I don't think the three goddesses played favorites

Hylia is dead.

In other games the other races have their own gods but by BotW the Sheikah have either converted everyone to Hylianism or made no religion the only alternative

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Not even a hint about what happened to that mountain. This game really squanders lore opportunities

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what am I looking at?

Zelda's getting married and imagining what her life would have been like if she was the Hero

you'd think Tumlbr would have given her more practical hero's garb

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it's better to be able to think about things yourself but nobody even mentions it, which is the real disappointment.
It's still probably from a stray Diving Beast laser blast though, I can't think of anything else that might fit

Is she marrying a dude or a pixie cut lesbian?

It looks more like a female Link to me

>Great!
>Now you do

she was asking on Zelda's behalf

Well of course

We'll never know who had the pleasure of repeatedly bedding Urbosa. Probably some no name Hylian although I have a strong suspicion Gerudo have other sources of men and aren't entirely dependent on Hyrule otherwise they'd never have survived fleeing their valley and holing themselves up in the deep desert

maybe they took some stock with them

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Are you suggesting they took men with them or they had a huge orgy before they fled and sent out scouts every so often to kidnap men and had orgies with them until they were fit for nothing

took men with them as breeding stock

but they'd have to come back and steal more they were gone for hundreds if not thousands of years before reestablishing communication with Hyrule

they did some low key raids obviously

>be guard
>sell out your camp to the gerudo so they raid you first

I want to believe there will be a cutscene in the DLC that shows Revali accidentally shooting a laser at the mountain while learning to control Medoh.

could they just accidentally fire the main weapons like that? I figure there would be safeguards

We all know the first thing Revali would do is turn off all the safeguards

yeah, probably

I kinda imagine after the 3rd week of being woken up at any random hour and forced to drink a stamina potion you'd probably think you were better off before

It could be like in the movie Edge of Tomorrow, where the guy inadvertantly changes the language of the machine and almost fires the weapon.

>ever betraying your waifu

>chained together and marched through the desert
>no food, no water, scorching heat
>those who fall behind meet death by snu-snu

>those who fall behind are left behind
>those who make it are suitable to be milked

I can't imagine a better way to die

w...what do they use the "milk" for?

it's great accompaniment to eggs

Many Gerudo beauty products use it as a base

Ever heard of a milk bath?

This is the ideal male body. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.

It's what I aspire to be