/dfg/ - Dwarf Fortress General

2 cents deposited in your account SCHLOMO. You cant fool me.

Then die

It's nothing too special, just weird is all. The guy talks about how he's got intensive hours, how his job is "sort of like a security guard", how he's not allowed any electronics on "the premises". Then, he says that he'd get Toady to draw a crayon drawing of his job so that we could guess it right. At this point, people had been guessing at his job quite a bit.

All of a sudden, all his posts had been deleted, as well as some others which weren't his (I think), and some suspicious sounding posts were made, insisting that nothing interesting had happened, and others (written in the same style) moved the thread onto a new topic rather quickly. Only one possible answer to this riddle: the CIA did it! (or Lizard People, or Aliens).

Hm

This makes me think that Toady must be working with the CIA

>mods delete off topic posts, or the poster deletes it himself, to keep the thread on topic
>autism intensifies and it backfires causing deletion conspiracy discussion

Meanwhile, back in on-topic land

Economy when

He's probably just a DoD contractor or GS employee that works in a SCIF, a NOC, or something with restricted access like that. Not everyone that works with a clearance is CIA. Plenty of helpdesk employees work for the DoD. Network infrastructure is pretty physically secured in even non-government-run facilities. If they have government contracts, they're fairly strict.

So when all these offtopic posts get deleted are you autists gonna sperg out even harder?

*dabs*

Yes.

/dfg/ a governent plot confirmed

>chop down as many trees as I can and kill elven diplomats and caravans to piss them off
>finally get invaded by elves
>they arrive in force
>getting my squads ready and positioned on the surface
>combat log appears
>confused, thought I had my eye on all of them
>check logs
>20 new logs all involving non-dwarf bards, poets, dancers and my own civilian dwarves and pets
>the biggest tavern fight I've ever seen has erupted
>every step I advance, 1-3 new combatants enter the brawl
>my soldiers are getting interuppted by drunk tavern goers as I try to bolster my forces on the surface
>the real fight hasn't even begun yet and there are already casualties down under

If any FBI agents are reading this I kust wanna say that I do not have a loli collection

Guys

What if

What if

What if we took /dfg/

And

And

We

We just

We just move it

We move it

And

Huh

We move it to

Huh

We move it to /int/

Yeah

What if we take /dfg/

And we move it to /int/

Depends on the state/country, if you're in the UK you can get jail time for it.

>misdefines what are obviously jokes as retarded conspiracy theories
Are you sure YOU don't have a touch of the 'tism, user?

Do you have a gallery somewhere online of your drawings? They're always my favorite parts of /dfg/.

If you assign Dwarves to tavern barkeep, dancer, scholar or whatever, is that all they do? If they have other labours enabled will they perform them from time to time? If I want a full time scholar and I disable all other labours will they spend an inordinate amount of time with no job?

>elvish invasion casualties: 0
>tavern brawl casualties: 8 and climbing

Blood for the blood God

2nded. I didn't save the one with the goblin's shield getting smashed by the swung baby and I'm REALLY kicking myself now. If anyone has it I would be indebted to you if you posted it.

Poast screencapes

one of my axedwarves was standing at the fight, not fighting, yelling "DEATH IS ALL AROUND ME" over and over, and then my champion came BARRELING into them, turned, and fucking killed one of MY human pikemasters from MY human mercenary squad

My best fighter in the entire fort never even got to the elvish invasion. She was in the tavern when the fight started and has been cutting through human bards like butter since the start.

The CIA strikes again.

Swordmaster Knight Illrala has earned 28 kills so far in the tavern brawl

>tileset

Those smoothed walls are absolutely horrific

what the fuck. He's been doing this all year. Can I just gut the fucker as an example, or is that a bad idea?

Yeah they're not my favorite. I couldn't bother getting a different set though, overall doesn't really bother me

I was planning to make one of my own

Scholars will still do other jobs sometimes, though they'll often take a while to get around to them. It seems that mine spend about 2/3 of their time doing scholarly stuff and 1/3 doing anything else, which works reasonably well if their other jobs are something that you need non-urgently and intermittently. I don't know if tavern keepers and performers are similar or not as I've never used any.

Try banning outsiders then allowing them again once everyone leaves.

>citizens only
>tavern still fucking packed with humans and elves
Well shit

You could always try removing the dining room designation.

I have noticed a pattern of people arriving at the taverns just not leaving, ever, under certain conditions. You can notice it when they never actually do anything, just constantly stand around. I've never had it not happen at least a little bit, but once it was so bad that I had a mercenary goblin murder about 20 of them.

Yeah fuck this I'm tired of the fps loss. They're now violating my NAP

>look away for a moment
>there shit all over my hospital
>wtf
>some guy's foot
>his hand
>upper torso
>...tail?
>check log

fuck

This post made me really sleepy for some reason, I'm going to bed.

I heard here once that you could make your civilians wear armor. Is this true? How do you go about that?

I never thought those 'go to bed goy' posts would escape from /pol/

What's the best way to train siege engineers? Just pumping out Ballista arrows?

>I assume so

Can't have been the poster himself, unless he's also a mod. Conspiracy 100% confirmed.
Also, shortly after, my graphics card started acting up. A reboot fixed it, so I'm not sure if it was interference from an Illuminati thought wave scanner, or just a regular backdoor.

you dwarves are all right, don't come to the meeting hall tomorrow

someone post that drawbro who did the tavern equivalent of pic related. I don't think I saved it.

So I'm trying to have my adventurer dorf retire in my fort and become a citizen. He's from the same civ etc and even turns up in the citizen screen however he can't be assigned labors etc, and is marked with a red line in dfhack labor manipulator. Is there anything that might fuck with this? He's in an adventuring agreement with some dudes in another fort if that's relevant.

Also for some reason several merchants turn up in the citizen screen too, also unable to be assigned shit.

Got a different one I came across in a town once.

>walk up to pull a zombie polar bear off someone
>hear a deity drown somewhere
>dude standing there weeping as he reloads and plunks bolt after bolt into the skull of his sleeping friend
>why

...

...

Amazing

...

> There are people that like elves in this very general

They're not bad, dwarves would've been the same if they didn't have the ability to mine

There's a sequel, but the copy I got is incomplete.

I am guilty of being lots of these...

Also, no CIA? If you don't appease them, they'll sink this thread too!

Got you covered
Dig to hell it is a blast

>file no longer exists
what happened?

By enlisting them.

>baby beard

Excellent. Thanks for posting it.

>dorf """"women""""

Why do I get a 404 when I click this?

CIA deleted it. Only conclusion.

we're fucked now

Alright, I just had a great (terrible) idea /dfg/! I think I've figured out a way with which to embark on a frozen ocean, and use pumps, caveins, freezings, et cetera, in order to get my way through the ocean. Wish me luck!

Also, does anyone have any name suggestions for this fortress?

Ice age

Perfect! Any ideas for the symbol?

this is an image of a blizzard man
the blizzard man is melting

Alright, done. Here's the preparations, the dwarves of Iceage are prepared to stay on the ice for years before breaking through to the heavenly earth below. If you have any more suggestions on what to bring, this is the time to give them!

>500 granite
Any drawfags in the building

Btw im sure you know this but you should make those into blocks to turn them into 2000 granite blocks

I think I've misjudged something, badly. I expected only the surface of the ocean to be frozen, but instead, it seems solid all the way down. I hope it doesn't unthaw while we dig our way through!

Yeah, I was planning on it. Here's the "caravan" by the way, though it seems to be more of a troupe.

With the frozen ocean thawing all around them, the dwarves of Iceage hurriedly move all 82(!) of their livestock into a small room, and set up an area in which to work with.

I hope to channel down a hole through the earth, and give this structure some supports, before the ocean melts away and drowns everyone. If this works, I'll have an accidental dwarven oil-rig, pulling up wealth from the depths of the ocean below.

Keep us posted you crazy dorfscientist

I don't think it will thaw, that is just snow shifting around on the surface

If it does, it will be a very abrupt thawing of the entire ocean biome

Cheers user, this is just one small step for dorfkind, though.
I bloody hope so, but I've got my two miners digging out a 1x1 staircase next to a 1x1 channelled tunnel. When they're done, I'll fill the channeled out space with a wooden support, up to my platform above. Better safe than sorry.

Right now though, I've got to find something for my five other dwarves to do, so they're moving onto securing a food supply, such as making nest boxes for eggs from the turkeys, and doing pic related for our pack animals.

keep posting

Of course user.

But more importantly than me keeping posting, is that the first Great Pillar of Iceage is complete! After one or two small mishaps, a granite pillar has been thrust downwards into the shale beneath the frozen sea! This means that if the ocean ever thaws, the Rig shouldn't collapse and sink to the bottom, which sounds like good news,

Here's an image of the Rig right now. At the top is a row of 7 bedrooms for the half crazed dwarves who wished to settle upon an ocean. Below that, is the courtyard, where the trade depot will be, as well as a meeting area exposed to the frigid air. To the bottom right is the original caravans area, and the animals, and on the floor above them are the workshops allowing all of this to happen.
The real excitement is happening to the bottom left: here, the two miners of Iceage are hollowing out a 7x7 cavity into the frozen depths, where we shall build our first stairway into the earth, rather than just a pillar touching it. I suspect this will take more than one or two seasons, and so I may have use of the bronze ores I brought along, for the creation of more picks.

Oh no, I think it's happening...

It's not all bad news though. It seems like the change in seasons has brought some new creatures. These are the first animals other than their livestock and each other, that the dwarves of Iceage have seen in many months.

It had to happen at some point. I forgot the bloody image.

So what's the plan now? Make the surface rig bigger, or wait for ice again and expand the pillar into a shaft to dig into the ocean floor?

F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5

I don't think that there'll be any "waiting for the ice". That seems to be all that's melted, sadly.
The worst part is, the game doesn't even have the decency to snow on my perfectly-prepared outpost, all it does is rain. This is the bloody arctic, at least give me some snow!

I'd repost it but the CIA would probably just intercept it again.
Maybe next thread, if I haven't been suicided by then.

That's not to say we're not without issues: if the dwarven caravan can't figure out a way over the (partially thawed) ocean, then we're going to have to start eating our livestock to survive (oh the horror, not gammon!).

But at least, when the poor, poor dwarves are living their horrible lives of prime steak eating, they'll have beautiful wildlife to look at, right?

That said, I've heard that leopard seals can be kind of dangerous. Perhaps I could send my military (of two bronze clad swordsdwarves) after it, and see what happens.

My plan now is to dig out that main cavity into the rocks, and maybe make some farms on a de-iced section of the seabed, because otherwise I'll have no way to make booze (not that I'll have a shortage of the stuff for a LONG time). After that, I think I'll focus on the surface and almost surface (so again, the seabed), and do some things there. All this is mid to long term though, I've got one or two problems to deal with first.