LYING on your RESUME

also, easier than lying about knowledge, lie about how friendly and charismatic you are, get into one of those easy to do jobs at fancy places like hotel front desk or whatever, just gotta Look Nice As Fuck Bro

I only have minimum wage experience. So basically not really applicable in any way to decent jobs.

Honestly how tough could it be to just weasel my way in? I highly doubt smaller companies check references, and if they do ill just find one that doesn't???

Thanks, saved to read.

Another thing I have to say. Make sure to list nontangible projects you have worked on and exagerate them a bit. For example, you could say that you tried to start a few companies or worked on a few projects 3-4 years ago.

You could also lie about organizations you're involved in. You could say you volunteered at XXX, YYY, ZZZ. You could lie about hobbies/interests to make yourself seem more like a normie.

You can even lie about references if you pay them. You could list a reference as your college buddy and give him a script to go by if he ever gets a call.

Really it's up to you. Just make sure to keep track of everything. Documentation is key. I lied so much on my resume it's not even funny. It looks very impressive but all I did in college was play vidya. I'm working for myself now so it doesn't really matter, but I was able to land a lot of interviews.

For what it's worth, I lied on my college apps, I never got around to joining the chess club

That's the plan.

I plan to mix legit and non-legit. Gonna do legitimate volunteering and github projects + totally made up shit.

Basically man I'm a fucking loser trying to make it. And I came to the conclusion that lying is a good opportunity for me to progress in my direction.

bump

>15/hr
They don't just give those to everyone with a slick resume, user.

please expand on your resume thing, it sounds intriguing

if u could post censored resume or examples on how you lied on it that'd be great

also what results did u get with that? what went wrong/good?

>Gonna do legitimate volunteering and github projects + totally made up shit.

this really begs the question, if u program as a hobby can u get away with lying about having a cs degree?

being 2 years into my cs major it seems like it'd be extremely easy lmfao

I'll try to post tomorrow when I get on my home computer if this thread is still up and I remember.

> It's not illegal
No, it is illegal. That's fraud.

If you try to lie about a degree from a university, especially a good university, they'll come after you. I knew a kid who got sued successfully for 40k from Yale.

Usually $15/hr is the line, anything above and they check your refrences. 99% of places check crimal history regardless of salary - it takes 5 seconds to do.

> former Recruiter

That said, it's very easy to lie about what you do day to day.

>sued successfully for 40k from Yale
fucking lol

> former Recruiter

what's something you could be most impressed about but would have the most difficulty checking?

Pff of course this works.
In germany politicians lie about their PhD and even about having A-levels.
Do you think they actually check? Just don't seem too fake and you'll get away with it.

Yea he is bs,
Everyone lies on there resume how do u think people get there foot on the door

For the college part no college goes aftwr u except ivy league cuz there jews, n ur fukin stupid if u put ivy leagu n never even attended lile u honestly think the recruiter sees ivy league n goes yea i believe tht, u go to ivy league svhools for connections tht make so u dont even need a resume to get a job where the company ur applying 2 already knows u by name,

In the tech every lies but never to the big companies,

Do it ur not alone i did it, 95 percent of people i know did it, i says 50 of thm lied tht thy finish college just male sure everyrhing is perfect n be confident n never apply to big companies

>Everyone lies on there resume how do u think people get there foot on the door

by not being mediocre and spending enough time on their CV to make it look super deluxe

Depends on the line if work
> Sales
Amount, price of the things sold
> management
Number of people managed, the scope of the business
> medic profession
Number of certain procedures performed

Just fudge the numbers, but not the dates (dates are easily verifiable).

Didn't say don't lie, just do what that other user said - half truthes. Omissions. Use the word client instead of customer when possible.

c) you do really well in your current job and then get a better job and then get a better one and rise to a position of importance.

then you have a background audit and your lie is discovered.

Look at it like online dating. If you're 36 and look 26, as some do, then you can lie and get those 18-22 QTs. But what if you really love her and meet the senpai and all? How long can you keep the lie?

You would have to lie to get an entry-level call center job? What kind of absolute retard are you? I failed out of college and had a 2.3 gpa in high school. I'm 21 and a year away from management.

What the literal fuck are you doing? Go get a job, you shouldn't even have to lie

It isn't fraud though. It's not illegal.

There have been cases of extremely high position people lying on their resume and getting caught. They never went to prison.

There was a lady who lied about having THREE DEGREES and worked as a dean of a top school for 10 years.

there's nothing of any real value in that entire thread. Read the whole thing and it's all mostly built on opinion and a false sense of knowledge.

if you're gonna lie, why do it for a $15/h job? the trick is to go as close as possible to lying

> According to the laws of several states, the cardinal sin of resume fraud is falsifying your educational record.
Under the Texas Penal Code, for example, it is illegal to use, or even to just claim to hold, a postsecondary degree you know to be fraudulent, substandard, or fictitious in order to obtain employment. This makes it illegal to either falsely claim you received a degree from an actual, accredited university, or to list a degree from a “diploma mill” (an unaccredited institution that offers “degrees” for a flat fee in a short amount of time with little to no coursework).
Punishment for resume fraud of this variety varies from state to state. In New Jersey, the use of a fraudulent degree is subject to a civil penalty of $1,000 for each offense. Texas, on the other hand, classifies falsifying your educational record as a Class B misdemeanor (punishable by up to $2,000 in fines and 6 months in prison), and Kentucky raises it to a Class A misdemeanor (punishable by up to a year in prison).

And, as I said before, colleges come for you in civil suites that can get up to 40k, depending on whether you profited from the job you kids to get.

That's a risk I'm willing to take.

That's on you my man, but honestly not worth the effort in my mind.

Either they:
> Look it up, realized you lied, don't report it, no job
> Look it up, realized you lied, report it, fine and record
> Don't look it up, find out later during a review, don't report, you get fired and will never be able to use that reference
> Don't look it up, find out later, report it, you pay thousands, get a record, lose your job
> Don't look it up, you live in constant fear of them finding out and you suffering the above consequences

>99% of places check crimal history regardless of salary
No they don't.

bump!

>all my references are is my highschool teachers
>I graduated 7 years ago
>only one job since then

Do people actually call references?

1. call university pretending to be employer
2. ask for someone with the same name as you
3. put that person's graduation date and degree on your resume
4. you just graduated uni good job

I've always enjoyed good Jewry, but detest outright lying. I suggest just using hyperbole to make your previous work experience better than it actually is. And if you have to, lie about holding a similar job in a similar pay-scale. There are less things to charge you with, it's a much easier act to keep up; and if you don't bite off more than you can chew (like lying about having an engineering degree) you might actually be able to get hired by another company, and permanently boost your value.

It's essentially the same as having an internship. You shouldn't stay there too long, but having it on your resumé will qualify you for a new field of jobs. Speaking of which, what do you guys think about lying about internships? Is it safer?

fuck resumes, interviews, and bosses
cannot wait to start my own business and be done with that wage slave shit