/ddlc/ - Doki Doki Literature Club! #169

hey guys, i'm not the usual critiquefag but if you have any poems or prose pieces you want me to comment on, let me know.

Copy-paste or link me to an old post, doesn't matter. As long as it's non-lewd I'll reply to everyone.

Natsuki!

Just Monika

Sayori but doing a matingpress on you

Natsuki!

Sayori but she found her way into the horse semen tanks again

Is she that addicted to Yuri's milk?

Keeping Sheepyori and feeding her has given that pet mentality that you are her servant!
She all-ins on her new human overlord role!

Yuri but with her horsecock lodged firmly with no signs of softening within Natsuki's ass again

Sayori but she found her way into Yuri's scrotum and is being churned into horse semen.

>he didn't choose to flood the lake
tfw no mareth gf

Silly Sayori, you don't have a peen!

>that filename

That's what she wants you to think.

...

Friendly reminder that the Doki Doki Literature Club General - /ddlc/ does NOT condone any of the following:

- Underage Drinking
- Self Harm
- Suicide and Suicide Attempts
- Substance Abuse (Any)
- Waifu Wars
- Waifu Bullying
- Heating Water For Your Tea On The Microwave (Please buy a[n electric] kettle)
- Not Doing Your Best To Be The user Your Waifu Would Like
- Staying Up Late

And, finally, you are encouraged to try/cry and exercise both your body with a healthy walk around the block or a flight of stairs in your daily commute and your creativity by writing texts of any kind.

Reminder that /ddlc/ also does not condone being australian.

What's wrong with heating water in the microwave?
That's how I heated up my ramen too.

...

Heating it in the microwave is okay, but whatever you do, don't heat it on the microwave!

Extreme tag with Arachne Sayori in her web labyrinth!

Hello, and good afternoon, everyone! I hope everyone is doing fantastic and having a lovely day so far.
It's time for a little bit of poetry! Doesn't that sound fantastic?

Word of the thread today is "window"!
Weird word, right? Still though, it's the word that started all of this so I think it's a nice throwback, and perhaps a good way to see how far many of us have come along.
While I'd prefer to not give alternatives today, I understand not everyone will want to do the main word, so our three other options this time are 'flame', 'glass', and 'hook'.

So, to those that don't know, this is an activity to inspire the creation of poetry! Everyone is welcome to participate, so don't be shy. We all had to start somewhere, and this is as good of a place as any! Basically, if you want to write something (even if it's not a poem), try using this word as your theme or inspiration. If everyone uses the same word, it means that it's easier for everyone to see other styles, techniques, and interpretations.
I hope everyone enjoys themselves, and I look forward to reading all of your poems!

youtube.com/watch?v=peCyw51yGqc
Monika!

I love her too.

You saved it, it's called cute edition but it wasn't happening
bless you user

It superheats the water instead of bringing it to boil and then explodes in your face when you drop a teaspoon in it.

Mixing cake mix and an egg in a mug!
Heating it up in a microwave for instant cupcakes!
Natsuki forced to eat them because she doesn't have anything else!

I've checked, and saw not but a cute pink slit!

I considered doing this once. Instead I just cut a slice of raw cookie dough and ate that instead.

Sayori but using a double ended dildo

For fuck's sake you can't boil water on the microwave.

Cute!

With Natsuki!!!

Natsuki but she's constantly sleeping.
[spoilet]Napsuki!

this user but he knows how to use spoiler tags

Hi Monikanon! How's your day going?

Natsuki but I shake her vigorously

Have you guys ever had a dream about one of the Dokis?

Friendly reminder to do ctrl+s for easy spoilers if you're using Veeky Forums X or derivates.

It is very important not to shake the Natsuki

Well hello there, user! I'm doing just fantastic today, thanks for asking!
Not a bad day so far, and I'm about to go get some lunch (and coffee) which will be nice.

I haven't dreamed in a while, so unfortunately no. I honestly might consider trying lucid dreaming at this point just so I can experience being with Sayori, even if it is just in my head

>you will never save her and enjoy club life together in the good ending
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU DANLET
MY HEART CAN'T TAKE THIS

I got one.

You probably shouldn't click this picture.

It's a hotglued Monika keychain

That sounds great! Hope you have a good rest of your day, then.

For fuck's sake..

ah, i remember this from yesterday
i still can't believe you actually did it

BUT WHY

I respect you

heh, have a (you) kiddo

I love her too.

you know, I called this like 5 threads ago
I'm surprised Monika got glued before Yuri though

How has nobody tweeted this to Dan yet, he looks at tweets too so he'll see it

I'm sorry.
Thanks.
no don't

I'm not mad, just honestly surprised.
Surprised the keychain came in.

What's wrong with Natsuki?

Do it.

why did he change his stance on this issue and delete the discord message? I really don't understand. Did the danlet memes actually get to him?

Better yet, tweet it to Monika's Twitter

Good afternoon!
-It Just Stops Moving-
-Chapter 6-
-Pastebin for new readers: pastebin.com/VjS3GjmN-
~Perspective: Protag~
It’s the day of the festival.
I wake up, and get into uniform.
I slowly help Sayori into hers, and we head off to our daily commute.
Usually, she just stays in the front office as a sort of office aid whenever it isn’t her teaching day. She’s almost just sort of a quasi-mascot for the school at this point.
But since today’s the Festival, I think it would only be nice to let her tag along.
She gets a few waves and wayward glances as usual as we enter the school grounds.
“Now, let me see…”
I pull out my phone.
Monika is waiting for everyone at the old clubroom, according to her text.
We make our way to the third year wing, and enter the room.
Just like the times at the Literature Club, the desks are put together to make a long table.
Yuri and Monika are having a nice conversation about cold weather and spicy food.
“Oh, hey!” Monika says, waving a little. It is clear that she feels much better now that she’s been able to finally get out that whole years’ worth of pent-up emotions.
Yuri also shyly smiles and waves like she used to.
Sayori raises both of her hands while smiling, which is her equivalent to a wave.
“Say…” I pick up.
“Where’s Natsuki?”
“That is a very good question.” Says Yuri, a slight hint of concern gracing her body language.
“I don’t know. In any case, come, come!” Monika pats the seat next to her. There’s a chairless desk next to her on the other side.
After setting Sayori into her spot and sitting in mine, Monika and I start talking, but it’s clear that both of us are distracted.
“Actually, hold on. I’m going to go look for Natsuki.” Monika says, getting up.
“You must be careful. Who knows what will happen?” Yuri admonishes.
“Oh please, it’s the beginning of a school day, what can happen?” Monika says, doing her trademark skirtflip before exiting the room.

Death of the Author, buddy. This game is bigger than him now.
Although to be fair, what ISN'T bigger than him?

Natsuki and Sayori

-It Just Stops Moving-
-Chapter 6 Part 2-
-Pastebin for new readers: pastebin.com/VjS3GjmN-
Ten minutes pass.
I attempt to text both Natsuki and Monika, but get no reply.
“Alright, I’m going to go look for Monika and Natsuki. This is getting concerning.”
“No, wait. We should all go together. We shall have strength in numbers, you see?” Yuri says, pulling Sayori out from the desk.
Sayori gives 1 tap.
“Alright, if it’ll make you feel better.”
We walk down the corridor.
We here a scuffling of feet in what should be an empty hallway.
“Protag. What could that noise b-“
I quiet Yuri as I peek behind the corner.
Natsuki is standing in front of Monika, arms crossed.
Monika is being restrained by a group of third years.
Natsuki inches forward.
“This is for all the things you said to her.”
She slaps Monika in the face.
I freeze in place, peeking through the corner.
I can’t move my body.
“And this… Is for the lives you ruined.”
She punches Monika square in the gut.
The way Monika reacts shows that Natsuki can throw a very hard punch, despite her petite frame.
She gestures, and the third years let go of her and leave.
Monika falls.
Natsuki puts her foot on Monika’s side.
“And this…”
She twists her shoe.
“THIS IS FOR SAYORI!”
She suddenly takes her foot off.
She kicks as hard as she can.
Kick.
Kick.
Kick.
All the while getting kicks in on Monika’s face, gut, and lungs.

I don't remember him deleting the heights message, only the one about genders.

seieki!

Trapsuki get away from my waifu !!!!!

Sickening

monika but she hasnt showered for thre days and she forces you to smell her scent

Wow thats pretty rude.

-It Just Stops Moving-
-Chapter 6 Part 3-
-Pastebin for new readers: pastebin.com/VjS3GjmN-
I clench the wall.
I run into the hall to confront Natsuki, grabbing her and holding her back.
She flails around.
“LET GO OF ME!”
“DON’T YOU REALIZE WHAT SHE HAS DONE?”
“SHE DOESN’T DESERVE MERCY!”
Natsuki then proceeds to curse like a sailor until Yuri comes in and helps me restrain her.
Monika slowly gets up, and runs away, hands on her face.
“Protag, you should be the most angry!”
“She’s the one that essentially killed your girlfriend!”
“Natsuki, that is enough!” Yuri exclaims in a stern voice.
“Stop talking like this, Natsuki.” I say in a much calmer voice.
“Everyone deserves to be loved.”
I don’t know what happened, but when I said that, she froze up for a second, and then actually broke free from our grip.
Her expression is a mix of fear, hatred, and the urge to sob uncontrollably.
Natsuki runs off.
“Oh, goodness.” Yuri says as we walk back to Sayori.
“Don’t worry, Sayori. We’re heading back now.” Yuri smiles.
Sayori is frowning. It’s been so long since I’ve seen her frown.

I would lick her clean

You've got good taste

...

This was my first time writing something what do you think /ddlc/? I wanted to make some wholesome Sayori but it ended up like this but its still non-lewd. I might make a sequel to this as its just the MC thinking about the past. Please do tell me your thoughts.

pastebin.com/uRGDndzr

Its short and I dare say bittersweet. But it probably has tons of grammar errors, typos, and continuity problems.

No more memes.

(you)

>seeing someone with actual writing abilities above me

fuck should of waited so I could feel less bad about myself.

I'm only taking a brief glance at it for now since I'm busy, but your writing could benefit from being separated into paragraphs, as it's just one big wall of text the way it is now. More bittersweet stuff is always nice though, especially since I'm a Sayorifag

Here's mine for today: pastebin.com/tf9zytrd. Not a poem, but I still I never got the knack for them. Monikanon, you're really helping me to get out of my 1-year-old writer's block. Thanks!

The only problem I see is the formatting, outside of that it was really nice for a short story.
Genuinely made me feel.

Pastebin's broken, my dude.

>put the decorative hyphen at the end of a pastebin link

Going on a nightwalk with Yuri through Doki City!
"Urban" folk try to rob you and Yuri!
Yuri pulling this fun trick on them!
youtube.com/watch?v=01NHcTM5IA4

I liked it man! You did well. My advice though as someone else said was breaking up the text goes a long way. It makes the story easier to digest

Not bad my man. It was as you said short however it was more sweet than bitter. UNLIKE DAN. The only thing would be to format to read easier.

Who was that user that said that Natsuki was acting uncharacteristic?

There's your explanation.
She was pulling a Mark Antony, and was plotting.

The story was good, but some of the vocabulary you used kinda puts you off the entire flow of the story.
For example: "With a shit-eating grin I finally see Sayori smile and even laugh." Replace shit-eating grin with something more neutral and fitting.

And Jesus Christ just use some paragraphs.

Sorry for the late post, but here's the pirate fic from a couple nights ago

Part 1- pastebin.com/H6ytcvDE
Part 2- pastebin.com/f9SkEayQ

Thanks for reading!

>pastebin.com/VjS3GjmN
Ahh, there we go. Thanks, bro.

I don't like your fic at all.

Good night, /ddlc/.

Goodnight sleepyanon

Good night sleepyanon. I think I'm going to go to bed, myself.