Redpill me on applying and interviewing for jobs

Redpill me on applying and interviewing for jobs

Behave like Ted Cruz in interviews, worked for me.

Don't give then a reason not to hire you. And then give them reasons why they should. Pretty simple.

Hide your nazi tattoos with a long sleeved turtleneck.

Wear a scarf if you look like pic related.

That's scary

>Be college graduate with 3.5 GPA and 4 undergraduate internships.
>300 resumes sent out
>Finally got a job offer at a dead end place

If you're not ready to send out 100s of resumes, then you're not ready to get a serious job.

Act like a douchebag to appear confident and energetic.


I mean, maybe just a teentsie weentsie tiny little bit, obviously still be respectful and whatnot

When being interviewed, be confident and recognise that precious time is being set aside to learn about how compatible you are socially with the company, and what you have to offer. Don't try too hard to be funny. Don't get too far off topic. Nobody likes a tryhard kissass. Bottom line, show that you'll absorb all information around you, and be friendly. Take a water if you're offered one. Handshakes are firm, eye contact, and a casual, confident nod, "nice to meet you, how are you doing?" or something along those lines. Show them you're comfortable in their space, and carry yourself in a manner that says you're interested in working hard. Most of all, relax.

It's an exercise in acting

Think horizontally not vertically: If you're a finance major/worked in finance before don't restrict yourself to finance sector, look at finance jobs in every industry. Even charities need CFOs,

Do you're homework. Stalk the fuck out of a company, look up people on LinkedIn.

Make a phonecall asking about the application process before you submit and ask intelligent questions, it shows interest, it shows that you're not shotgunning every company in the hopes of getting a job, it implants the idea that you might be a good fit.

Understand the business, there was a book I read called 'Don't Send a CV' that said sometimes you don't even need to apply formally, just send them a letter saying:
"your company is doing X... and that's losing you money, have you thought of doing Y" because if you know what you're talking about chances are you can solve other problems or add value.

That's what it all comes down to -- how can you bring them more revenue or save them on expenses way more than your salary. How can you, as a hire, make them more profitable.

The last 4 job offers I got...there was no interview (formally)

>mfw experienced hire
It really sucks to be a first timer, user. I've been there. It's just a number's game. First job took 6 months to get, 2nd took 3 weeks.

You have to take charge as the alpha and interview them instead

Watch shemale porn before you go into the interview. I'm not kidding, thinking about Bailey Jays dick every 5 minutes really helps ease the tension.

Also, be confident is your abilities during the technical portions and don't be afraid to admit you made a mistake if they bring it up, however don't be autistic and bring up mistakes if they don't ask about em.

How much will minor spelling mistakes in a CV translated into a 2nd language fuck me up?

>get called for an interview as a junior editor/writer for a news outlet
>assume the interview is in my native language
>its in English
>guy is impressed with my English skills
>only have my CV in my native language
>guy asks me to send him a translated CV
>send it to him
>realize I wrote country's instead of countries'
>letters missing from 2 words (interational instead of international, univesity instead of university)
> wrote "I Have" instead of "I have"

Also the news agency wants to set up an office in my country but they wont be doing so until mid/late July, therefore they're still in the interviewing candidates process and I haven´t heard from the since I sent my translated CV a month ago. Should I give them a call or write to them just to check up or would I sound too desperate if I do that? if so, what should I say/ask?

I did something similar

>Be me applying for IT job
>Databases SQL shit
>Know my stuff but severely autismo
>Get Email back asking for interview
>Decide I should imitate Donald Trumps mannerisms and charisma
>got him in the WH it can land me a job
>Fast forward to interview very nervous
>tired from watching Trump interviews the night before and trying to copy his style
>Sit down with a lady from HR and a guy from the actual IT department
>Nail his Q and A about the software and documentation stuff
>Now its the hr roasties turn, asks why i want to work there
>I'm ready for this as I have memorized achievements about the company and how great it is and how exited ill be just like the Don does
>Works pretty well they are smiling and seem to like me
>Ask some more questions about myself that I answered well, put the same emphasis on words really sold myself
> I actually felt like I was Trump
>FuckYeah.jpg
>Last question was "If you're working in a group and one member is not cooperating what do you do?"
>Without thinking I say "Fire them"
>The mood of that room changed as soon as I uttered those words
>The HR lady could not hide the horror on her face
>Even the IT guy looked up as if he could not believe what I had just said
>HR lady dismisses the interview and escorted me to the elevator
>Did not say a word as we were waiting for it

Fucking kill me, and fuck HR

Dishonoraburr self bump

The scary thing about this is that there's a small part of me that believes this.

My sincere thanks for sharing this comedic tragedy with us.

HR was actually one of the worst inventions ever though. Especially since it is entirely female-controlled.

Should've imitated Cruz, he's more of a politician rather than a fighter, which is more optimal for initial presentations.
But what you should've done is that after you said that and the whole room gazed at you, you should've laughed and said "I kid, I would inform them or negotiate so that they cooperate" thereby mending the whole awkward exchange into a joke, this makes you more personal and pleasant to be around.

Please help

Call them or write them, show that you're persistent.

Should have done a useful degree or went to a top UNI for a useless one for the connections. Your own fault.

Lmao. You deserved it.

Fuck that scares me

Kek'd

>be 3 months away from graduation with like a 2.3 GPA
>comp sci
>go to a job fair
>send out maybe 5 resumes as well
>get 5 interviews and 3 offers
>$50k starting, notbad
>3 years later making $90k
Git gud

Find out who is interviewing you and look them up to see what they like. A personal connection is all it takes. One time I found out the person interviewing me was a Yankees fan so I looked up Yankees and learned a bit about them and their stats. When I went to the boss' room you bet I found a Yankees poster and I said something like, "excuse me, but I see youre also a Yankees fan; What do you think of A-Rod's performance last night? We talked batting averages for half an hour and I got the job without any professional questioning.

where you live man?

fuck