How suicidal are nocoiners getting?

I dunno senpai, I pretty much look like a neet loser with no money but I have 150k in my crypto portfolio that no one knows about.

I know that feel. Offered 2 times for my help to create a wallet. Both turned down
>its just gambling
>no real profit here
>its all a scam

Yeah, I didnt mentioned it ever since to anyone and never will. I let them be, cause I dont want to rub that stuff under everyones nose, would be annoying.

>150k

He thinks he has money!

user here again with the story of my hooker celebration
>find a duo on escort site
>two fit 21 year old Italian girls
>call them up and say I want a rimjob and a blowjob at the same time and I want them to suck me without a condom until I cum
>they say sure but it will cost extra
>I agree because siacoin is making me rich
>show up at their place
>"oh btw we don't lick ass"
>I'm like wtf but I still want you to give me a double blowjob without a condom
>they say no
>they end up giving me a pathetic blowjob with a condom for 5 minutes.
>they get impatient and start tapping their watches and saying "cum babe"
>one of them just starts giving me an angry handjob for about 2 minutes until I cum in the condom
>went expecting awesome porn sex with 2 hot girls being my sex slaves
>ended up paying premium prices to get a condom handjob from 2 sad drug addicts
FUCK YOU SIACOIN

leave a bad rating on Yelp!

Stop humblebragging, scum. You probably don't have more than that.

>user was so beta did not refuse when the hooker tried to scam him on the rimjob
>Got scammed all the way until his small cock was all covered of his own semen
fuck you SIACOIN

>the only solution

But how do you cash out?

I got $100 to put down in ETH and another $100 to ride on Digibyte, but the only reason I haven't kracken'd up to dive in is because I don't understand the endgame here.

How the fuck do you actually reap the physical gains for the supposed lambos and the like?

Lmao at the retards stuck in these massive liquidity traps.

explain further

>tell gdax to send money to my checking account
>receive money in a couple weeks
Its not hard, not sure why people act like its some insanely difficult tax to get back into fiat.

task*

Let this be a lesson to all of you retards who did not buy DGB as instructed.

>tfw invested in DGB when it was less than 120 sats
>decide to literally celebrate last night by getting bottle service at the trendiest nightclub in my city
>call up the boys (who also invested in DGB)
>go through the VIP entrance (at the back in case you didn't know)
>sit down at our table just above the dance floor
>start smoking blunts (which is ILLEGAL here) and nobody gives a fuck - in fact some women are visibly impressed and keep glancing over at our table
>get bottles of Bombay Sapphire and lemonade brought over
>gesture to some women on the dance floor to come join us
>the girls are all undergrads
>ask us if we're gangsters, tell them "yes but not the kind you know about"
>they are all intrigued
>tell them about how we're involved in sophisticated crypto-trading day and night (even doing some on our phones in front of them) with a network of people across the planet
>one of them even knows about bitcoin
>all of them are visibly getting wetter as we're telling them about taking calls from connects in Switzerland and Japan in the middle of the night to get sick gains on our portfolios
>they ask how much we're making
>"You think we're the type of guys to tell girls like you about that?"
>they fall for it (all of us are in the 4-digit portfolio range)
>2 friends and I end up bringing girls home with us
>I barebacked mine, came inside her, my friend did the same to his, the other friend went home with the girl who knew about bitcoin so they just made out a bit
>texting each other strategies for getting these sluts out of our houses so we can get back on Veeky Forums trading DGB

Learn how to do this shit right my man.

#DGB #NOHOOKERS #NOCONDOMS

Solid 10/10 night IMO.

well there are 2 factors here i'm not seeing:

A. How do you get your portfolio or the portion you want of it into a manner that you could exchange it for the direct fiat? (port all your stuff from kracken and polo over to gdax and then attempt to exchange it for cash? What if you don't have a buyer for your large quantities of alt/shitcoins?)

2. How exactly does taxation work. Is it raw computed to your income or is it capital gains if you only made it in 1 year?

>How do you get your portfolio into a manner that you could exchange it for fiat?
Sell for BTC, send BTC to GDAX, sell at market price, transfer out.
>liquidity
This bullshit about the market not being liquid is nothing more than a meme. For all of the coins that I have substantial positions in the market has a volume of tens of millions of $ a day.
>taxation
Same way as capital gains from stocks. Which is another reason that nocoiners are absolute retards as far as I'm concerned.
>haha the IRS is going to assrape you with taxes
You mean with the exact same rate they charge on index funds? Its like they're bragging about making less money when they do this.

alright user, you've convinced me.

How does this portfolio sound:

$100 ETH
$100 Digibyte
$100 siacoin

Letting them ride for 3 weeks and then taking any and all gains made from that and going into the shitcoin casino?

10/10 larp

ETH is always good longterm and with ConSensys next week it could easily go to $150, DGB is probably a safe bet as long as you buy around 600 and don't panic sell if it temporarily dips, I really haven't looked enough into SC to comment on it. I think XEM is poised for a breakout though, its been having sideways movement for a few days and usually does this just before going up towards a new ATH.

Thanks user, i also think i'm going to jump into GNT considering the tech behind it is good for a longterm investment.

I would want to put some into Bitbay (i feel like it is just a superior Bitcoin in every possible way, but will never have the name brand or power of the gold standard)

If he has 150K worth of BTC in 2017 he will be a multimillonaire in 2020.

Damn bro, alpha as fuck!

>start smoking blunts (which is ILLEGAL here)

haha wow broah u sure r kool

>Italian hookers

Should have gotten blondes

>you cant get rich anymore of crypto
honestly a couple of years ago I thought this was true.
Been fucking around for 3 weeks, almost made as much as my regular day job. I'm really glad I went down the rabbit hole, I don't mind the extra cash at all and I hope I do better in the future.

not even the taxes, just a massive obstacle course with a 17-riddle sphinx at the end

fuck em, stop explaining to people that don't believe IMO. theyll be cattle-clients when you're driving your lamby in the sun

I bet you guys aren't paying attention to Dogecoin. It's the next moon mission.

No-coiners, don't say we didn't warn you.

>receive money in a couple of weeks
>weeks
reminds me of that online poker site that screwed everyone out of millions

coming here really makes me feel better about my conventional decisions in life, thx senpai

>giving money to women
>not putting more into coins

im a latecoiner, only invested just over a week ago in xby and dgb very cheap. thank you biz, already have more money than ill earn in 20 weeks.

Crypto has given new meaning to my lonely life

>BTC to local exchange
>Withdraw instantly via ATM
>Fucking faster than transferring fiat from one bank to another