Itt: badly explain a historical event

Sounds like most of their history to be honest

We were the dominant superpower for hundreds of years but then some guy brought his oversized pets into our yard and started our downfall.

>You used to be my friend you fat fuck
If you guess the event you win the game

American invasion of iraq

Kek
Not even close though

WW2

pedophiles eternally butthurt by a kraut

Protestant Reformation

Jews win

"holocaust"

Trips confirm

Coalition fighting force gets bored along the way and instead backstabs ally.

A bad-ass general stay with the ego above his head,thinks that he is new emperor of a nation,crow himself as the emperor of that nation

Napoleon
Seventh Coalition?

Hannibal's invasion of Rome

That's a good answer, but did Hannibal really fuck Rome over?

Greeks refuse to pay debt

fourth crusade.

And athens becomes aragonese

The Ceausescu's.

>Local monk takes job seriously; ruins everything.

lol

Election of 1912 or just Taft and Roosevelt in general

Martin Luther

>Some commies gets angry
>Commies decide kill
>Commies kill their leader and family of the leader

>Patton, except for the part about him being "brilliant".
Explain

Czar Nicholas 2?

It's not that hard to follow. Patton was hardly a brilliant military leader. Hell, I'm not even sure I'd call him an average military leader. His record as a whole is decidedly unimpressive.

However, the rest of the description is obviously patton, so it's what the user was clearly referring to.

dirty horse people really want rule their southern neighbors, invade then culturally assimilate themselves and forget their dirty horse past

Mongols
How can you say that? I mean every battle except the Battle of Fort Driant was a victory for Patton. I am sure you are familiar with his Miracle at Bagstone where he turned his army almost 90 degrees and marched to beat back the last German Offensive. He was also the most feared and respected Allied general in WW2. I mean I could list many other facts and victories, but I am curious why you think he is below average.

Not exactly,but yes.

>A Austrian
>A Balkans-nigger
>BANG
>WW1

Were you speaking specifically about the massacre of his family?

Then he was like "I could have this swine, watch me have the glory fellows" and then he trotted off and POOSHH! He was no more and the Scot lost his finest metal.

>How can you say that?

Because his performance in North Africa, Sicily, and Normandy were all below par, he couldn't function in joint efforts, and stole supplies from his allies.

> I mean every battle except the Battle of Fort Driant was a victory for Patton.

And that makes him different from other American and British late war forces how exactly? How many defeats can you attribute to Devers? To Bradley? Hell, even Clark managed to pull his front forward, slowly but steadily, and he has a much worse reputation than Patton.

>. I am sure you are familiar with his Miracle at Bagstone where he turned his army almost 90 degrees

user, maneuvering an unengaged army is hardly an act of operational brilliance. Breaking back a force that had already stalled on a hopeless plan doesn't make him a good general.

> the last German Offensive.

Lake Balaton was the last German offensive, not Ardennes.

> He was also the most feared and respected Allied general in WW2.

And yet, I can't find any German contemporary documents corroborating that. He's pretty much only respected by pop historians.

>I mean I could list many other facts and victories, but I am curious why you think he is below average.

Because, quite frankly, he was below average. He was aggressive, and aggressive in a position of overwhelming advantage, but that was really all he had going for him. He wasn't particularly tactically innovative or possessed of finesse. His men were ambivalent towards him, he was a glory/media hog, and he didn't get results that were any better than other corps commanders.

Read up on a guy like pic related, and you'll see just how badly he blows guys like Patton out of the water.

The answer was the Manchurian invasion of the Ming Dynasty, so they weren't really mongols... just Manchurians who were pretty closely related. Similar language and culture.

Every single war after 18th century

Christian radicals decide that communism and polygamy are the answer, their degeneracy proves fatal.

October Revolution?

Mormons?

The October revolution killed lots of people, user.

Trying to unify a country in the midst of chaos, an ambitious man comes forth to steer them into a greatness not seen for a while.

Monarch is shocked when his cousin declares war on him for attacking lands controlled by someone outside the family.

Garibaldi and italian unification?

Romans started pimping in the 'hood and got shanked by their own whore

Mormon are still around user ;)

Fat man wants a divorce, so he creates his own religion.

>Italy
>greatness
It's obviously Nappy

fat ass rides horses with friends on the hillside

>And that makes him different from other American and British late war forces how exactly?You would be correct in saying that most American allied generals had relative success in WW2, those reasons are up to you to determine. Devers was a great General, but he was more of a planner. While he did lead soldiers on a battlefield, he seemed to be the best when he was planning and distributing resources, even though he was on the front lines a lot. Bradley was seen as successful, or even more by you, because he was Eisenhower's favorite. That fault was on Patton though, he was very headstrong and said things maybe he shouldn't have said, so Bradley and Montgomery were usually the first pick for the supplies.

>maneuvering an unengaged army is hardly an act of operational brilliance
The speed and the terrain he went through was "amazing" though. It was the middle of winter and he was expected to cross this terrible terrain with a large army and he did it in a few days. This was only because of his brutal training and strict regiment he gave to his troops.

>I can't find any German contemporary documents corroborating that
General Heinz Guderian himself, after Germany’s surrender, told his Allied captors, “From the standpoint of a tank specialist, I must congratulate him for his victory since he acted as I should have done had I been in his place.”
I have a few other quotes if you want them, I just didn't want to take up more space. Also, he was decoy for D-Day because the Germans were so worried and "scared" that Patton would absolutely crush Germany.

>he was a glory/media hog
I mean that's kinda all that was bad about him. He didn't know when to shut up, and that ruined any chance for him to have upward mobility and ruined chances for him to command a D-day Army.I'll post another post about his victories I see that make him above other generals

>you and your neighboring third world shithole have a border dispute and a war.

Waco seige.

Had they not lit themselves on fire theyd have gone down in history as badass rednecks.

The Protestant reformation

Literally the entire history of the Balkans, Caucasus and like half of Asia

Not quite!

Fourth Crusade / Sacking of Constantinople.

The Three Kingdoms (Cao Cao) period is what I was going for. Next 'best' answer would be Trump.

Jonestown?

>Invasion of Sicily
I am sure you have heard of the Race to Messina. Patton saw that Montgomery was given access to a highway that was promised to Americans, and Patton decided he could get there faster so he broke through the lines and got there first. In fact, it was such a surprise, that the Italians had their Flaks facing an entire different direction.

>The mop up in Africa
When America first got into the war, their troops in Africa were just terrible. They were suffering terrible defeats and the British thought lowly of them. Eisenhower gave Patton command, and Patton quickly disciplined and trained the Americans, and they won battles at Gafsa and El Guettar. While it is ruled as indecisive, it was a turnaround for the Americans, and was a great help to end the battle in Africa.

>The Bastogne turnaround
He directed his men at a 90 degree turn, and headed in just a few days, in the dead of winter, across hills, mountains, and mussy roads, to relieve and beat back the Germans at Bastogne .Also I apologize, I mean it was the last major offensive on the western front.

I mean to sum it up, he had some bad publicity stunts, but his aggressive attitude paid off in nearly every engagement. he used tanks the way tanks were supposed to be used, and he drilled his soldiers to keep up with his aggressive and quick attacks.

Longbows + wind + snow = bloody meadow

Another swing and miss :^)

Three friends. One dies. The other two realise they're not good friends after all.

King Henry the eighth and the Church of England/

Trump obviously

...

glorious revolution/ james ii

Sort of? Rome's reaction to Hannibal's invasion lead them down the path to tyranny, which lead to their downfall. The problem with the answer is that Rome wasn't a superpower prior to the second Punic war.

a trespassing animal almost starts a war

Hannibal crossing the Alps?

nope

Fugitive Slave Act of 1850?

My life

no

Qing China/Manchu invasion

Cuckoldry ultimately leads to bronies massacring a city

>be knight
>enemy has like no infantry
>charge
>run into stakes
>get shot
>lose

The Big Three during/after WWII

Bearded spic almost causes the end of the world.

Cuban missile crisis

Fuckin' Castro man

Cuban Missile Crisis
end of the ussr*

the empire almost(practically) declares war on itself

Apparantly democracy building by dropping guns on muslim extremists doesn't work

>How can you say that? I mean every battle except the Battle of Fort Driant was a victory for Patton
Hard to lose when literally every factor is in your favor.
Read War as I Knew It. Patton was a blustering moron with very little sense, but amazing PR skills.
There's a point where he goes to bitch out the crew of an AT gun for being positioned wrong. Because the mighty Patton, lord of all that is armor, thinks THAT kind of position at a 4 way intersection is shit.
Gun crew then points of the multiple burned out autist tanks in front of them. They'd been fucking shitting on German armor with absolute impunity. Patton, being his usual stupid, temperamental, impetuous self, had missed multiple knocked out tanks right in front of him.
Shit like this abounds.

He didn't need to be good to win. The allies had the numbers, money, and materiel to Zap Brannigan their way to victory if needed. Add in tons of lower level initiative, and all the general needed to do was not COMPLETELY fuck up and they came out looking good.

Helps that Patton played the public like a fiddle. 1940s America loved a revolver toting jackass covered in stars who didn't lose, and that's the EXACT image Patton went for. People ate it up and he became a folk hero.

Don't forget that he'd have outrun his supply lines if given the chance.
>Also, he was decoy for D-Day because the Germans were so worried and "scared" that Patton would absolutely crush Germany.
...because we talked him up in propaganda. His actual results were average at best.

>I mean that's kinda all that was bad about him.
He had a habit of making a COMPLETE ass of himself in front of his men, and had to be kept on a leash lest he do something retarded.

We a good empire, we din du nuffin.

I would also recommend The Path to Victory: The Mediterranean Theater in World War II; it's not definitively about Patton, but about the theater as a whole, but it really chews up his performance in North Africa and Sicily. (Along with that other meme general, Rommel).

The revolution thingy in portugal
Soviet invasion of Afganistan

Either triumverate in the transitional period of Rome.

The pig war.

yes