Annoying things in /hist/orical movies

Things that annoy you with /hist/orical movies? For me:

>story set in ancient Greece/Rome/etc...
>said Greeks/Romans/etc...are characters portrayed by actors speak with very obvious British accents
>because filmmakers think this is accurate

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=J7MYlRzLqD0
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sack_of_Rome
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

tu demens frater?

>movie/show is about Romans
>no matter what the time period is they wear lorica segmentata
>half the time it's not even proper lorica segmentata it's leather that approximates the shape of it
Special mention goes to the history channel Barbarians Rising series. Which not only has the Romans wearing lorica segmentation during the second fucking Punic War

But has Hannibal wearing a 4th century AD Roman Centurion helmet with a Chi Rho on it

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>(((History))) Channel

That's not even the worst rendition or depiction of Hannibal the History Channel is guilty of.

ayo hol up

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Why?

Also to add:

>Greek/Romans portrayed by actors that never look Italian or Greek and typically Nordic as fuck

>Ruler of Carthage
That's easily the worst part

VAE VICTIS

I don't really care if they don't fit the racial profile of the person they're supposed to be portraying (it is acting, after all) but things like the Chi Rho and "rule of Carthage" are just terrible

>lines immediately break and everyone evenly distributes them self to fight one on one
>during fight scene they're very clearly aiming for eachother's swords instead of eachother.

Hello Lloyd

>tripfag

youtube.com/watch?v=J7MYlRzLqD0

I actually did this as a joke, and forgot I still had it in the name field.

It's kind of hilarious, and a fine way to get the daily (you)

>the dark ages were a thing
How do we wipe this meme from the face of the earth once and for all?

There was certainly a simplification of economic structures and decline in cultural and scientific output

HBO Rome was an exemption.

Sure the main cast was, but all the extras were italian.

In the DVD commentary, Ray Stevenson comments on how Italian propensity to wax their hair or use gel led to extras having shit running down their heads due to filming in summer.

>medieval setting
>all clothing is grey or brown

>story set in ancient Greece/Rome/etc...
>they wear trousers or pants

I know it's not historically accurate but red tunic and brown trousers clash together so fucking well for some reason

>decline in scientific output

but... the scientific method came from the dark ages didn't it?

I agree with a bunch of books being burned though

Thats what happens with a massive decline in infrastructure and education

If the movie is in english what does their accent matter? They're already speaking the wrong language, might as well speak the right version of it(queens english).

I've always found this criticism weird

>carthage is on the continent of africa
>therefore carthaginians are black

ok so then bashar al assad is a chinese man

Is it even technically possible for an entire movie cast to speak classical Latin?

Passion of the Christ. Everybody spoke Aramean, Latin, Greek and shit.

I care if an actor or actress fits a racial profile because (((they))) are replacing historical white figures for the sake of their diversity and less whites propaganda.

>bashar al assad is a chinese man

Well we already have japanese romans

just need to wait for romanaboo-ism to spread to the rest of asia

>queens english


yeah, have some tea, ugly

>movie shows a German panzer
>travels more than 10 yards without breaking down

Have them speak the correct language then like in the Passion

That's the best option but difficult to pull off, not only do you need good actors, but ones that can learn to speak Latin fluently

I love movies like that, but when they can't pull it off English is fine

>angelina jolie plays a greek
>puts on a bad russian accent
roooooo

>the scientific method came from the dark ages didn't it?
In what way? It came from the Renaissance philosophers.

They were a thing. There are a lot of misconceptions about them, but you are not helping get rid of them. Fighting memes with memes only begets more memes.

>story set in ancient Egypt
>everyone is white

Hes literally an egyptian

Huh, is the 300 getting a sequel called 35100 or something?

Rami Malik is Egyptian
Kek your faster than me

>story set in ancient Egypt
>said Egyptians don't speak ancient Egyptian
>women's breasts are covered
>the night sky is shown, but they didn't even account for the precession of the equinoxes
Filmmakers are fucking morons, how can anyone watch all that shit?

Are you two autistic?

Why are you asking about that?

>Sure the main cast was
Most of the main cast was quite compatible in terms of facial structure.

You're either missing the joke or explaining it.

Explaining it.

>Akkadian character
>Played by half black half Samoan actor

Dude all brown people look the same lmao

>muh Noridc looking

I bet you can't tell apart who is Italian and who is German if you put guys in this pic to a same group with Germans

I always thought it was an ode to Shakespeare

>story set in ancient Greece/Rome/etc...
>said Greeks/Romans/etc...are characters portrayed by actors speaking any language other than historically accurate Latin without subtitles
>because this is accurate

Northern Italians are Germanic rape babbys

>any language other than historically accurate Latin
You are aware many of them would often speak Greek?

>STOP THIS MEME

>have probably not significantly altered
>probably
Can you cite a proper source that is not Wikipedia?

What is your basis for thinking that a settled population of several million people could be replaced by the immigration of a few thousand?

It's not an isolated place like Sardinia and has been raped many times by Germans so of course mixing will occur.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sack_of_Rome

t. Terrone

>mixing will occur
Sure, some, but nothing near replacement level. That would take hundreds of thousands of years.

Look at Ireland, it had gigantic invasions by foreign peoples twice in its lifetime, and was subject to a government-sanctioned program of attempted outbreeding in the 17th century, where a foreign element that amounted to 1/5th of their population was forced upon them. And yet, 89% of Irish people are descended nearly exclusively from Ireland's original pre-Celtic neolithic population, and it's speculated that most of the remaining 11% is Celtic admixture.

A few hundred rapes is not going to suddenly replace a population of several million. Are you fucking stupid?

>ruler of Carthage
REEEEEEEEE

Fuck off you absolute idiot

There is atleast one white guy in japan or chinese films

Have you read about the Germanic sacks of Rome? Even just those Wikipedia articles? They were pretty tame.

Anyway it's a moot point because hundreds or even thousands of rapes aren't going to significantly affect a population of millions.

Cirian hinds who played Caesar was swarthy as fuck(he's Irish though)

>Schindler's List

It's a great movie but I really hate how it gives off the impression that the Holocaust actually happened

>British don't have Roman accents
But user we're 3rd Rome

>Romans wearing Lorica Segmentata in republican and late imperial ages

It was rare even when it existed, because it was expensive and prone to rust. You had to maintain it constantly or it would fall apart.

It didn't vanish overnight, some troops continued to wear it in the 4th century

>Veeky Forumstorical movie/series
>turns out to be generic american produced trash

Well that's a comedy about an ancient roman travelling in time to modern Japan

Russians only had one rifle for X amount of men

But it was generally rare even at its peak. It wasn't what all Roman troops wore for the entirety of Rome's empire.

That said the main reason they are so common in movies and shows is because they're stock piled from previous productions and its easier to rent them out for a shoot than to make period accurate armor from scratch.

Would still be nice to see some hamata or even squamata from time to time.

NO FUCKING COLOR

Modern Hollywood seems to think color wasn't invented until the 1950s, and you can show how historically accurate your movie is by making everything gray and brown.

this times a million.

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Love this honestly.

The funny thing about it is, I recall correctly, brown was pretty rare due to it being more expensive than colors like red.

Why did History Channel portray Hannibal as the good boy? He is literally the one who started the the 2nd Punic War by sieging Seguntum

From my knowledge, women in ancient Egypt only showed their breasts when mourning. Am I wrong?

Carthage was in an agricultural and economic boom and he had to fuck it all up.

north italians are Austrian bastards

>series set in early medieval Scandinavia
>with very few sources and material from the period meaning you can be fairly historically accurate while still using plenty of artistic freedom
>GETS NOTHING RIGHT
>made by the "History" channel

>female warriors

kek

just fucking kek

I also noticed there seem to be some trend to shill viking wymmyn meme in entertainment industry.

the irish accents were more immersion breaking 2bh

so you be sayin

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*Panther or the Tigers
The Pz. I-IV were fine

How else do you convey an imperial upper class accent to English speaking audiences?

I hate this complaint, unless you want dodgy italian/greek accents just stop whining, any english that isnt american or accented sounds British because british is the default

This
Well, if they're patricians

It was not that uncommon anymore from the punic wars onwards. The lorita hamata was still the most commonly used piece of gear for the legionaries, I'll give you that.

You are. Noble women wore see through gowns and lower class ones didn't cover their breasts at all.

My bad, I think I was basing that off of Herodotus. So probably very off.

>muh bastards

Cry more, Gennaro

>because filmmakers think this is accurate

No they don't you retard, it's because it's easier to get actors to speak in a British accent than to speak Latin, and an American viewer will more readily associate British accented English as an 'older tongue'. The shorthand works.

Producing a script in Latin is going to be considerably harder than producing one in English, as well.

>Romans are always the bad evil empire
>Main characters are in a progressive underdog rebellion

Was never talking about having the actors speak in Latin, you dumbass.

Where's this even a thing?

>Gladiator - Romans are good guys and bad guys
>The Eagle - Romans are the good guys
>Centurion - Romans are the good guys
>Rome - Romans are the good guys and the bad guys

>Spartacus - le evil roman slaveholders
>Cleopatra - le evil roman invaders
>Ben Hur - le evil roman pagans
>Passion of the Christ - le evil roman sadists