Need christian advice fast

My sister kate (top) and her friend emily are getting high and smoking outside (pic related)

Emily told me to take a photo then she invited me to "snort some lines" with them. She said if I get high with them her and kate will give me "the fuck of my life". Kate looked at me an nodded and said she was emily's slave today and then went back to staring at emily and stroking her hair. I said I'd be back in 20 minutes

That was 5 minutes ago. I just got off the phone to my pastor he said not to give into the temptations of the flesh because the "rewards of heaven are greater than anything of this mortal world" or something and reminded me that jesus died for my sins. I asked him if jesus would forgive me and he said no and something about sin and "the great evil"

What do I do?

>starting a thread with a random pic of Paris Jackson and expecting us to believe this

Tell them "how about wine instead?". Use sanctified wine from the altar, it will prevail over them, when it takes over report them to the authorities

Your pastor is gay. The fact that he likes kneeling in front of a half-naked man covered in bodily fluids should have been a pretty big clue.

Ignore him and give in to this imaginary offer of sex.

your salvation is already assured. whatever you do, make sure to take pictures

This is some serious /b/ level shit.

It's bullshit. you can enjoy flesh and drugs and still excel spiritually. Christians are just severely repressed on the whole. If this is not bait you are simply dumb for not taking advantage of the situation, unless you took some kinda celibacy vow or are a recovering sex/drug addict.

Voluntary celibacy out spite is the only way. Embrace asceticism.

this.
FAGGOTS, READ THIS BEFORE YOU SHITPOST MORE.

Sin mightily so that grace may abound.

>implying you have to believe OP to shitpost

why the fuck is this thread on Veeky Forums of all places?
what is (((your))) reason for thread sliding?

Christian ethics probably make people happier than your mindless hedonism.

I for one prefer blow and hookers.

That's because you didn't think enough.

Slam them like a screen door in a hurricane

>Christian
>"Ethics"
Bottom jizzle. Seriously, Christianity, spiritually speaking, more or less has built-in mechanisms, when practiced as it is today, that literally prevent one from advancing spiritually any more than about halfway, when compared to other religions/spiritual traditions.

whoaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh noooo waaaaaayyyyy brooooooooo duuuuuuuuuuudddddeeeeeeeeeeeeee whooooaaahhhhhhh

>implying
I'll drink you under the table and take sexual advantage of it every day of the week boy!

>he fell for the spiritual advancement meme

it is a pyramid scheme user.

different user but boasting about your alcohol consumption and rapey tendencies is an odd way to try and prove that you are an intelligent person.

Seriously, can we at least have one mod on this board? He doesn't even have to be here all the time, or even entirely sentient. Hold a mirror under his nose, if it fogs up, then I'll take it.

This is fucking ridiculous.

Well according to Protties you can always repent as no sinner is too sinful to be forgiven.

*according to the Bible so long as the sin is not blasphemy against the Holy Spirit

As a knight of the faith, OP, you cannot in good conscience leave without slaying your sister's pussy. Since we have established that your sister has fallen off the Path and her maidenhood is at risk the only way to salvage her honor is to break her in yourself in order to ensure a consummation made out of pure love and not by the lustful appetites of some serial lecher. See Genesis 4, its more relevant than ever as your line is in danger of going to seed

...

this board really has gone to shit

I'm glad my sister is just as much of a weirdo autist as I am. As least we can be pure together.

Your pastor's wrong. No matter what sin you commit, you can be forgiven as long as you ask Jesus to forgive you. There are murderers and rapists and torturers sitting in Heaven right now because they repented their sin before the end.

So snort that coke and fuck your sister.

She's trying to troll you dummy. You're going to go back out there, get hyped up on drugs and when you try and lean in to make out with one of them they will both start laughing and say "ohmygosh you actually thought we were serious?! AHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!" They will probably be filming you while this happens and they will upload the video to the internet so that you will forever be known as the kid who did blow and tried to bang his sister. Don't take the bait user!

>It's a pyramid scheme
How does a pyramid scheme work when you're working by yourself? Do you know what a pyramid scheme is user? I do not think you do.