Brainlet history thread!
Post retarded shit you used to think about history.
>Thought the american civil war was fought between North America and South America
>Thought Japan and China were the same country but just named differently over time
>Thought Vikings came from the north pole because it's the only place with snow
>Thought that siege towers were works of fantasy and refused to believe that they existed
>Used to think countries were on different planets
>used to think ancient europe didnt have people of color
Used to think that the Catholic Church wasn't the Church founded by Jesus Christ himself.
>Picrel of hydrant was nazi symbol, because H means Hitler
>II world war is still going on
>Ancient Germanic barbarians looked like Mongols, only Romans and Gauls had blonds
>Medieval started in 1 AD, and Romans started building "medieval" castles
>thought America and England were the same thing (both start with A in my language)
I post this in every thread but
>Believed that New York city spanned from Washington DC to Boston
I believed NYC was in Hungary because I watched a film set in NYC and everyone was speaking in Hungarian thanks to dubbing.
> used to think the Khmer empire was something like 10 000 years old
> soviet union == russia, right?
> Korea is so small in front of China; so Korean language must be Chinese with some small variation
And finally:
> Everyone in Poland is named Paul
For my defense, I0 was extremly naive and had religious-tier faith in my brother
I thought Britain basically won WW2 themselves with a bit of help from America. My dad has a skewed vision of history.
Is your dad Lindybeige?
>thought the ussr was one of the axis powers
>thought that slavery ended because of the civil rights movement
>thought the vikings were in north america before literally anyone else
>Thought the Gulag Archipelago was an actual archipelago
>Thought that zeppelin raids during WW1 were a retarded steampunk meme.
I used to think that nobody was on Ireland until Catholicism happened and St Paddy went over.
>thought Hungarians are the same thing as Huns
>thought Turks are native people in Anatolia
>thought Romania is a state similiar to Israel, but established because Roma Gypsies needed their own country.
>thought Romanians are Gypsies.
>thought Rome was conntrolling whole Europe, and Barbarians were entirely of Asian origin.
Bist du Deutscher?
I thought the civil war thing too
I thought Abraham Lincoln was the first US president.
>Thought the us civil war was about state rights
>HRE was a centralized nation
>Anglos won at Waterloo
>thought Romania is a state similiar to Israel, but established because Roma Gypsies needed their own country.
>Used to think Picts weren't African
>Thought Babylon was the capital city of Persia
>Thought Vikings came from the north pole because it's the only place with snow
>the only place with snow
Where the hell are you even from to get such an idea stuck in your head?
>Thought slaves built the Egyptian pyramids
>Thought Napoleon Bonaparte was short
>Thought you could see the Great Wall of China from the Moon
>Thought viking helmets had horns
>Thought Europeans got African slaves by catching them
>Thought Marco Polo introduced pasta to Italy
>Thought Christopher Columbus sailed to prove the Earth was round
Na klar, Amerika und Angland fangen ja beide mit einem A an.
These are all very common misconceptions. I'm sure a lot of people have had them.
I thought Russia was Nazis and the ones who started ww2 when I was a kid.
Thought Normandy was another name for Norway, so D-Day was in Norway.
>thought that the Axis were the bad guys
I thought Morocco was the same country as South Africa
Thought that the Romans where the good guys.
Ask anybody in Europe if they like the Germans. Then tell them you love the Axis.
>special sauce for you
...
>Normandy was a country during WWII
>the Eiffel Tower was the "Paris Tower" and was centuries old
>the Middle Ages looked like a fantasy realm from comics and video games
I believed in all of them except the Marco Polo one.
>WW1 was a battle during WW2
>War of 1812 was a myth
>Thought the Holy Roman Empire was science fiction from some sort of "what if" movie where Germany never existed
>I thought the Hanseatic League were a bunch of boats making up a city in the middle of the sea, Waterworld style
This
Kill yourself
>war of 1812 was a myth
user...
but napoleone was short
I used to believe that everything east of New York in the USA was the Wild West, as in Lucky Luck.
>Thought you could see the Great Wall of China from the Moon
Wait you can't?
>Used to think that Britain and USA were the only modern countries, and that everybody else essentially lived in either medieval standards or 19th century tier standards
When i went to Germany at age 11 it blew my mind that they had cars and not horse and carts.
I don't know why i had this conception, i think it's something to do with charity adverts showing everywhere to be mudhuts and dirty water.
If you could then you could see every road from the moon too.
The misconception is retarded, its long, not wide
>Thought that zeppelin raids during WW1 were a retarded steampunk meme.
This was me until right now.
I thought America won the Vietnam war
>Thought that the Holy Roman Empire was holy, roman and an empire
Are you from the USA or Britain?
Holy fuck you guys are retarded
>Thought Nazi was a place in Germany, hence "Nazi Germany" which to me was Nazi, Germany
That one is true
>I thought that Zoroastrism was the state religion of Babylon.
>I though that medieval Europe was as shitty, muddy and miserable as they parody it in Monty Python and the Search for the Holy Grail.
>I thought that the only difference between the roman and the greek gods were that they had different names.
>I thought that southern Sweden (Skåne) had always been a part of the country.
>I thought that the Hanseatic League was still around to this day and that it had reinvisioned itself as a sort of franchise for shopping centers.
>I thought that the swedish soldiers during our imperial days were called caroleans (karoliner) because they were all named Karl.
It makes me so hard that England is effectively Angle-Land in your language.
>Thought Prussia was between Poland and Russia because its name was a combination of Poland and RUSSIA
According to the people who have been there, it's hard to even make out the continents. Of course you can't see a fucking wall.
It kind of was in the late 18th early 19th century.
It's the same in english really. The e isn't that far off soundwise.
As a swede I sometimes jokingly refer to people from england as "Fieldlanders" (ängländare) instead of englishmen (engelskmän) since the combination of the sounds for a and e makes an ä.
The phoneme /e/ isn't. The 'e' in England, however, is much closer to the phoneme /i/ which is.
>Thought that WW2 was a religious war between and jews and christians like the religious wars between protestants and catholics
I thought USA was a white country
How? Even in Hollywood movies they send to the entire world there's always a shitton of niggers.
>used to think fantasy creatures such as dragons, ogres, trolls, fairies etc, etc. existed during the middle ages and were hunted into extinction
Thought the Soviet Union was the same thing as modern Russia for a long time, up until like 15.
>Thought the holocaust was real
Actually in the past no. Most actors are white. When I was young black actors were mostly in a minority of mainly black movies, so the logical thing was to think they were africans. Maybe african immigrants in the USA.
I meant in the "present" (when I was a kid), the late 20th century.
>I thought that the only difference between the roman and the greek gods were that they had different names.
Like 90% of the people still believes this.
Kek i believed this too
>Thought my country was actually relevant during WW1
Until about 12 I was convinced the Gulf War was fought because an Iraqi fleet invaded the Gulf of Mexico.
I actually believed it until I read your comic and looked it up
Britain. It doesnt make sense because i traveled Europe extensively around 6-8 YO
Not in the 90s growing up though
>WW1 was literally just millions of soldiers walking in close order into machine guns over and over
>the US Army won ww1 because they refused to dig trenches and fought smart by using cover just like in the Revolutionary War
I thought "the Gulf" was a dude who caused the war. I also didn't know that it was actually the first Iraq War.
>my comic
W-what?
>thought Romania is a state similiar to Israel, but established because Roma Gypsies needed their own country.
>at some point, I thought the past was in black and white
the USSR was one of the axis powers, right up until Operation Barbarossa
I used to think Britan was where france is, the idea of them being an island was kind of strange to me
I used to believe all of these except Marco Polo one
I keked
>>Thought Christopher Columbus sailed to prove the Earth was round
wait that's not true? I thought it was part of the reason why he did it other than to find a new way to India
Why would he need to prove it? Why would some random merchant want to prove that? Columbus didn't even circumnavigate the globe.
It was well known, at least among educated people, that the Earth was round by that time. They actually had a good idea of how large it was, too, thanks to mathematics. That was why no one wanted to give Columbus funding, because they thought he'd never make the long trip across the ocean from Europe to Asia, not realizing there was an American continent in-between.
The only reason Columbus himself thought it was possible is because he thought the world was actually pear shaped, and so smaller in the northern half than in the southern.
Every educated person in 1492 knew it was round. Columbus' theory was that it was *smaller* than the conventional wisdom said it was, and that therefore he could plausibly reach the Far East sailing West. Everyone else thought this was retarded and suicidal because the distance was too great.
Columbus was totally fucking wrong; the mainstream calculations of the Earth's size were nearly exactly correct. However nobody had realized there was an entire western continent in between Europe and China, so Columbus went down in history as a visionary.
So i told Columbus to sail around the world
He actually did it the absolute madman
I used to think that England and Europe were the same place.
Later, I thought that the United Kingdom was Europe and England together.
I also thought Japan was much further out in the pacific. Like, Hawaii tier.
Columbus also died before anyone managed to conclusively prove that America wasn't Japan, so he spent the rest of his life smug as fuck about being right where mainstream academia was wrong.
(As a kid,tho)
>Thought cannons were invented in the 20th century
>Thought Prussia was it's own nationality
>Thought Austria was not german
>Thought Germany was united in a conquest by Prussia
>DDR is Nazis hurr durr
Thanks grandpa, you fuckin' moron
>>Thought cannons were invented in the 20th century
>>Thought Prussia was it's own nationality
>>Thought Austria was not german
>>Thought Germany was united in a conquest by Prussia
>>DDR is Nazis hurr durr
>Thanks grandpa, you fuckin' moron
I FEEL LIKE YOUR GRANDFATHER WAS AN AUSTROFASCIST.
PLEASE TELL ME YOUR FAMILY IS AUSTRIAN.
I NEED THIS.
I did too until i asked my grandparents.
But he didn't
I used to think the Roman Empire existed during medieval times and wondered why Rome Total War and Medieval Total War were separate games.
>Thought Greek people still believed in Zeus and Greek Orthodox Church worships Greek gods
>Thought Germany was united in a conquest by Prussia
But that's true
magellan did that, friend
>tfw used to think the holy roman empire was actually just the Roman empire converted to Christianity
