Let's have one of these threads again. Last time was ages ago, and it was pretty quality stuff.
The gist of it is, post things from games, TV shows and whatnot where they just got things so wrong it's funny.
Here we have the Vikings TV show's idea of what Anglo-Saxons looked like. Apparently they wore strange uniforms, some sort of leather cuirass, helmets clearly made of fibreglass, and stood around with small shields in a formation that can only be described as retarded looking.
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Ryse, Son of Rome is a favourite to bash.
"Let's take stereotypical Segmentata legionaries, fuck everything up, add edgy patterns designed by a 14 year old and make sure the Scuta are sized for ants"
And let's not even bother with the """"""Barbarians"""""".
Note how they gave this Celt a Germanic name.
And while we're talking about pop-culture barbarians, here we have some "Picts"
Deadliest Warrior is a pretty good one. All the so called experts weren't experts at all, they just matched the ethnicity of the warrior they represented and could pose for montages by "training" in their gym.
>watching the episode with the black army guy expert
>takes out a manlet knife and says that it's not about size, it's how you use it
>in his demonstration of the knife, he chimps out and starts hacking away at the dummy while screeching like a howler monkey
>dr. Dorian walks up afterward, finger blasts a stab wound and confirms that the mutilated gel head would be a dead guy if it were a real boy
But they were cool, they could run night and day and had no problem to slaughter their own kids just to put some pressure on their opponents. Also they had a badass makeup and haircut. I wish they were like that.
Don't forget the ZOOLOO!!!
Fuck me that shit was cringy.
Meanwhile, here we have the latest Ass Creed game, and it's idea of what Ptolemaic soldiers looked like.
So yeah, supposedly they wore Corinthian helmets, strapped Thyreos shields to their arms, carried swords that don't really resemble anything that ever existed outside of a JRPG.
They appear to also have had a tendency to strap all sorts of shit to onto everything. Little tusks on their helmets, random bones and tusks hanging everywhere, and of course the token tartan bits to make them look Galatian or something. Oh, and the token big retarded asymmetrical shoulder pad, for that Van Darkholme S&M look.
I'm fine with artistic licence and all. I'm not a guy who goes nuts about minor inaccuracies. However, I think that everyone can agree that compared to how Greeks, Egyptians and Galatians actually dressed, this can only be described as looking fucking retarded.
>People believed salt was more valuable than Gold in the classical era
like haha nigga it's literally everywhere
I know it's fiction and everything, but I never can get used to the way Arrakh swords are represented in the HBOs Game of Thrones. I know there's million of other things they got wrong, but Martin clearly meant that they should be curved the other way, like an ottoman yattagan, or whatever the anglo spelling is correct
Holy shit! New Vegas 2??
Like bro it's just a show who cares if they got it wrong.
[spoiler] god this arguement annoys me, if a movie had ww2 tanks in ww1 people would complain yet this shit is fine?[spoiler]
>if a movie had ww2 tanks in ww1
I can't watch Battle Of The Bulge without getting triggered by this, these are meant to be Tiger II's and the Chaffees as Shermans is retarded, fucking lazy props department
It's in Patton too. It's pretty much the only thing about Patton that makes me angry.
Seriously, at least get some plywood, paint it, and stick it to the tanks to make them look remotely like a Sherman or a Tiger II. Wouldn't be good but would still be a hundred times better than what they actually did which was nothing.
They can look passable, this is a T-34 modified by some Yugoslavs
Don't have the image, but that black soldier in Dunkirk.
It was the 1950s, people didn't give a shit.
Actually they didn't up until even the 90s. But nowadays the audiences are a bit autistic with that thing and so nowadays we have shit from dolling up cheap/existing tanks (like this Panzer plywood shell over a surplus T34 in a Russian movie), or using the actual fucking Tanks themselves like in Fury.
The weird thing is the Soviets and the rest of the Eastern Bloc were way more concerned with it, I wonder why that was? I know they had a lot of T-34s still sitting around but they put in far more effort to make the German tanks look accurate
Because- in addition to accuracy- Gommunist Europe wanted to really differentiate between them and Nazis who considered them scum?
Also couldn't show your Tanks get BTFO on screen. The non-Commies among you might get the wrong message.
Because the Eastern Front was huge, and there were more people alive at that time who actually had seen these tanks.
the holocaust.
actually based off an unsuccessful tiger prototype from when there was a competition between a few companies to land the manufacturing contract:
en.wikipedia.org
pretty sure i've seen these tigers with the turret too far forward in other films - i think the one in saving private ryan is like this
the bayonet charge scene in we were soldiers. missed out on some cool depictions of tactics just for some hollywood stunt.
>of course the token tartan bits to make them look Galatian or something
But the Ptolemaics were famous for the galatians they recruited as mercenaries.
who could forget Black Christian Hannibal
The states monopolized salt and they usually used a toxic formula too. The Spanish authorities would look at a reduced rate of salt related poisonings as evidence that the villagers were "counterfeiting salt" which meant simply reclaiming it from the sea. But you won't even see this mentioned in threads on spain, like most history everyone just memes the low hanging fruit.
To be fair they aren't picts but mysterious people further north who were more primitive
>[spoiler] god this arguement annoys me, if a movie had ww2 tanks in ww1 people would complain yet this shit is fine?[spoiler]
You were saying?
is this a correct armour for Carthaginians
Assuming its the sacred band, we only have knowledge of their general type of equipment, so it's a decent assumption, but its too fancy for actual battle equipment, unless carthage in this hypothetical timeline is so rich they dont give a fuck.
The wrist bracers are stupid and ahistorical though.
Let's not forget the bronze-age Egyptians in Rome: Total War
The point clearly was that they're an incredibly shitty depiction of Galatians
Rome Total War is such garbage. I like how their symbol is randomly an Anhk. And the symbol of the "Greeks" is a lightning bolt.
They really did zero research for it. But the main problem is that it was a garbage game compared to both Medieval 1 and 2.
This one? m.youtube.com
The worst part is people hold Rome 1 as the greatest total war ever, going as far as to claim its much more complex and detailed than the newest games.
Fucking nostalgia retards
Rome 1 did have some things going for it though, it has a simple, but surprisingly refined combat system with a lot of interesting details like pic related.
It definitely does do some things better than games on the Warscape engine, and if you add mods to the mix you get some really good gameplay.
Fucking kek'd
The game called Saboteur. Apparently you could drive from France to Germany in 1940 no problem. Also it was such a surprise when Germany invaded France, who could see that coming. And when the MC heard that they were going to invade he said "They are going to start a war!", yeah not like they were at war the last year or so.
Europa Barbarorum forever the greatest Total War
There wasn't any people North of the Picts.
There wasn't even any land.
Still though, it was the best WWII Assassin's Creed there's been.
Lets not forget Sherwood archers in me2
You're joking, right?
It was charming. I didn't care that the units were cool and interesting, and close enough to the real thing that when I researched deeper I wasn't disappointed by the truth.
It was literally what made me into history.
Also it is mechanically very fun to play.
The Saboteur is MEANT to be a ridiculously over the top pulp/camp adventure though. It's about an Irish racing driver/SOE agent driving around blowing stuff up while being chased by zeppelins and hiding out in a French stripclub after all.
>they put in far more effort to make the German tanks look accurate
Because unlike the Americans, the people watching the movies have actually seen and possibly fought the Tigers.
These things were practically exclusive to Eastern Front.
Most of American audience never saw a single one in reality. The number of troops in Europe was marginal, there was absolutely no involvement by the civilians and to top it all off, of those enlisted, a good number served in non-European theaters with absolutely zero Tigers.
Everything about this. Literally dropping the ball on every aspect of the Northern Crusades. Why even embark on this endeavour if you are not going even try?
Hopefully the Sagas thing will revisit the setting so some actually talented people can mod it into a tolerable shape.
>fucking lazy props department
I always forgive BotB for the obviously wrong tank models because they used like 200 actual tanks in a movie
What's wrong with your pic? I can't make out shit because it's so lo-def
Oh my God, Patton. These fucking tanks completely ruin this film.
>The weird thing is the Soviets and the rest of the Eastern Bloc were way more concerned with it, I wonder why that was?
No budgetary constraints really. They could just tell some engineers from a state factory to turn a bunch of tanks into other tanks with cardboard and sheet metal. No need to worry about paying them.
Same reason why battle scenes in Soviet movies are god-tier with thousands of extras and horses, cf Waterloo.
...
Shit, I thought this was just /pol/ being dumb, but that is reaching pretty far.
I posted this in the last thread - but it's still my favourite.
The Saxon warriors in The Last Kingdom wearing Renaissance helmets.
This
Like I'm pretty sure this is a case of the props department using the armour from another production that was just lying around.
Perfectly explains why the Soviet Union didn't crush them, they feared the black marshal
DA BLACK POWA
The producers wanted the saxons to look different from the vikings SO badly. It's almost funny. The fact that they cannot understand eachother in the series is a joke on itself. Saxons and Danes could've easily understood eachother
Bleh, my bad - these are the soldiers of Wessex from Vikings. Probably even worse since that's set earlier than The Last Kingdom
Yeah, they really went for this hamfisted 'noble savage Danes' v. 'cowardly civilised Saxon weaklings' sort of approach - the scenes in The Last Kingdom where Uhtred needed to teach the Saxons how to do a shieldwall was ridiculous.
Diversity MUST be retroactive. Shit like this makes me mad about the future and how society and entertainment will force everything to be diverse. "Sorry, we need 1 more black transgender in this movie and a asian 2nd main lead."
Why are the swordsmen at front? The spearmen right behind them are literally 3 times more affective in that position. Also that 1 left handed swordsman ruining the "formation".
This game is set in the Bronze age right? Those weapons and armour look very....whats the word...Steel!
The last kingdom was even worse. So many furs. Lindybeige did a good video on it.
>inb4 >lindybeige
>this game is set in the Bronze Age right?
It's set in the Ptolemaic Kingdom.
I think it's actually supposed to be set in the Ptolemaic period - apparently Cleopatra is a character in it
from Gladiators
also their Praetorians
I really hate this movie, I don't know what people see in it
their action scenes is pretty cool
that's about it i guess
They think that Ridley Scott still is a good director.
I like the story and characters
Whats wrong with this specific scene tho?
The story's fucking great and so are the visuals.
every WW2 doc mentioning the beginning of WW2, ever
>dude the french army sucked lmao
>dude the french had shitty/no tanks lmao
>dude poland had no air force lmao
>dude whats norway lmao
Standard issue armor is what's wrong. Lorica Hamata would have always been more common than Segmentata.
flaming arrows,roman formation immediately breaking with enemy contact,pila being used as spears instead of thrown and the roman helmets are from the english civil war era
>America won WW1
>America won WW2
The film Patton where the only tanks in the film are either M48 Patton or chaffees trying to be every tank during that war.
dude sparta lmao
This shit.
People think it's realistic because it's old and they showed tits.
youtube.com
What bugs me is Novgorod starting out too big to be fun.
>This shit.
>People think it's realistic because it's old and they showed tits.
>youtube.com
But that scene is probably the most realistic depiction of Roman infantry combat there's ever been on TV or in film.
Yes the Gauls are wearing some strange gear, but a lot of it's not terrible, and it isn't really any more immersion breaking than all the films where Legionnaires are all wearing segmentata.
...
this is what i don't get about the entertainment industry.
i understand and even encourage some fantasy to make things more colorful and visually showy, but why go with shit that is more than clearly inferior to the historically accurate designs? they aren't adding anything, and by anyone's accord it just looks worse.
is it just autistic ego that makes designers and directors choose something "unique" over the hardcore historical and actually cool things?
Or not mentioning the Soviet conquest before 1941.
Jesus they're gonna have evil Rome come in and go after an innocent Cleopatra aren't they. Depict her as a brilliant military commander who only loses at Actium because of evil templars and alien bullshit being used by Augustus.
what game you autist?
Lrn sum history bruh
Hey man, gotta provide the wewuz market with some KWAYN action
What was wrong with Teutonic?
t. Person who doesn't know anything about the region's medieval history
>Sorry, we need 1 more black transgender in this movie and a asian 2nd main lead.
Except nobody cares about asians or trasgenders. The diversity meme is always about the Eternal Negro, and sometimes some women.
No those are T-54/55s T-34s are norrower and taller than Pz IVs. You can tell it from the tracks to.
Tiger from saving private ryan was T-34 though
just take the new king arthur movie, always triggers me
>They really did zero research for it
they did far more research than anyone had done in a game set during the classical era, problem is they focused most of it on Rome itself, while depicting everyone else as historical caricatures(not that "urban cohorts" weren't a caricature themselves)
once you start looking at it as "renaissance shitter explaining the ancient world: total war" or "Herodotus: total war", you appreciate it more. But modded, it's fucking incredible.
It's meant to be a Guy Ritchie film with swords instead of shotguns though. They weren't trying to make Morte d'Arthur.
it's st. maurice
It's Hannibal.
>UK
Everytime lol
They played as the filthy pagans and couldn't win
>Barbarians Risingis an Americandocudramatelevision series executive produced by Adam Bullmore and produced by Michael Waterhouse that airs onHistory Channel.
What did they mean by this?
>Barbarians Risingis an American docudramatelevision series executive produced by Adam Bullmore and produced by Michael Waterhouse that airs onHistory Channel.
What did they mean by this?
Not him but all anglos are cucks (americans are part of the anglosphere).