Hey Veeky Forums, ive recently been caught for money laundering. I made around 5 million USD this year from crypto alone. That's not including my regular income from my company which I do pay taxes on. I thought i did everything anonymously. I bought bitcoin off of localbitcoin with cash and jumped into monero and then traded it over TOR and a VPN. Somehow the feds still nabbed me. Judge isnt too nice. I'm currently on bail but its looking like 10-20 years. Here's my question, what is the best long term hold for me to profit on when i get out? As soon as i realized the feds might be on to me, i placed my cold wallet in a place where (((they))) wont find it. I do also have the private key memorized so I can still access it. Help me out biz. What should i hold? I don't have much time.
GOING TO PRISON FOR TAX EVASION IM FUCKED BIZ
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Post proof or it didn't happen
Prepare your anus
LARPer
Bitcoin is not anonymous. I was just reading an article this morning about how easily the justice department can trace bitcoin transactions to the buyer and seller and they especially monitor large transactions.
>guys i made 5 million
>didnt pay taxes on it so i got IRSd
Nice one. So tell us smart guy, how could you get in trouble for laundering $5 million in cryptocurrency when its impossible to turn crypto into fiat legally or illegally. Fucking LARPers.
Link?
How is it impossible? What about using exchanges?
So you're implying you never sold your coins for fiat, yet for some reason money laundering?
That doesn't even make sense.
>impossible to turn crypto into fiat legally or illegally
Are you retarded
>I do also have the private key memorized
That'll end well. You'll end up forgetting it a few years in and spend the rest of your time tormented trying to remember it. Just fucking write it down and dig it in a hole like Andy Dufresne
/qst/ would be a great board if everyone in Veeky Forums posted there once a day
enjoy the cum in your anus fag
Or you can memorize one of those seed derived private keys.
13 or however many words is easy to rememner.
Why didn't you just move to Puerto Rico for two years and become a resident? 10-15? lol I'm sure your joking but if not, fucking LOL
10-20 years for tax evasion?
lel never, not even in america.
>this faggot fell for the Monero is user meme
You know 80% of transactions are traceable, right user?
But I thought America was the land of the free? That sounds like something that would only happen in a socialist hellhole.
Yup and 76% of statistics are made up
max prison sentence is 5 years faggot
fake news
>made around 5 million USD
and you cant afford a lawyer?
This is the faggiest LARP I've ever seen. Literally.
Lmao stop playing with this larper. Literally impossible to find you out if you laundered properly unless you're buying yachts and shit registered in your name with cash. Second of all for this kind of crime jail time almost never occurs, and even in that case it would be a maximum of a few years or house arrest. At least make up a believable story if you want responses
I think it can remain anonymous but let's assume user's story is true (probably isn't) he probably deposited it into a bank account that they can track him from. Ofcourse feds will be wondering where the fuck this huge pay check came in from.
Liquidation = death.
You can't cash out of exchanges you noob cuck. It's a scam
Now you are trying to gain followers by spreading fear XVG bros? Not cool.
Hahaha! Land of the free!
WOW now even the 3-Letter Agencies are trying to spread FUD. And not even doing a good job of it. Dear Special Agent, go home and molest your daughter, you know you fantasize about it.
Hahaha how does it feel to take nigger dicks in the ass for 20years
I've done it several times from Coinbase, knockwurst.
Nice LARP. You wouldn't even have access to the internet if you were caught laundering 5m.
The feds "nabbed" you? Is that how you guys still talk?
Ok Agent Johnson
Larping basement dwelling faggot
Fat virgin autistic wagecucking larping faggot makes obvious larp thread to get answers for his retarded larping scenario that will never apply to him in real life just like sexual advice unless it's homosexual would never apply to him in real life as he will remain an eternal virgin for life. Anons respond to his nonsense anyway