Walk into your museum and see this

you walk into your salon to practice harp and see this

what do you do?

>would love to buy some really sexy Aphrodite/Venus tabletop statues to create a contrast with anime figurines
>almost all of them are ugly
>the ones that aren't ugly either have no nipples on the exposed breasts or are missing arms
Like what the fuck are these people doing? Huge statues for gardens have nipples but not the ones for tabletops?

Essentially Greek porn and it's nice.

Slap her and wait for her boyfriend's response.

Finish the work and imprint my hand on one of her buttcheeks because clearly the original author meant to do it.

You deserve dead either way

Hey babe you come here oft-
*realises it's a statue*
Woah.
>The statue would have been polychromed,[5] and was so lifelike that it even aroused men sexually, as witnessed by the tradition that a young man broke into the temple at night and attempted to copulate with the statue, leaving a stain on it.
The world's first recorded hot-gluing.

>Ancient Euros the same as Modern Humans
The more things change, the more things stay the same was never more apt. Then again, all those Roman graffiti.

>tfw pentecostal

Brah stop...

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pygmalion_(mythology)

first waifu fag in history

Walk to the beach and witness pic related

how react?

Testing.

You walk over to your son playing in the garden and see this.
What do?

>Ancient Greeks and Romans were literally the same as Japanese otaku today with art
Now that I think about it, isn't most Renaissance and Enlightenment art basically porn for wealthy merchants? Most of it is nude women.

>not being able to appreciate the female form without immediately thinking of porn

Well, think about it this way: if you were one of the rich wealth merchants in the past, and you had a boatload of money in a time with no TV and internet, and there's a crapload of poor artists that can make anything for you, why wouldn't you have them make nude women paintings, sculptures, and murals for your own enjoyment?

you're carving a flint rock into an arrowhead when pic related walks up next to you

>hey stud, like what you see?

wat do

Cried and maybe commit sudoku because his peepee is bigger than mine.

>Missing arms
>Somehow bad
Stick up to your animu trash, you weeb.

where are your nose?

That statue originally had arms on it, you fuck. Maybe you think all those Roman statues did not have color on them during the period of time they existed in Rome or Greece as well?

Have to say that's one fine ass.

I guess that's what happens with gaining superpower status. People just do stuff because free time.

> tfw won't stumble across her smiling at you while out on a stroll by the sea

her ass is too blocky or close together

These kinds of threads make me love Veeky Forums. Sexy art goes through time.

Id have no problem with painted REPLICAS displayed by the piece of art. I think it would be kind of neat.

I already knew that she had arms before. And she's better without it.

THICC

>tfw I will never participate in an ancient courting ritual where I hunt down my wife to be, laughing and screaming through the forest like my father and grandfather before me.

>tfw I will never have a wife, period.

Why even live?

pic. yes, I know it's the "Rape of Persephone/Proserpina".

Ben you like traps

*blushes*
"Oh my. Curator, there is a naked woman in here!" : o
*runs away*

You remember that we're talking about Rome, right?

nice namefaggotry, faggot.

god i wish that were me

being raped/molested by several women as a child?

I'm by no means a Romaboo, but you should be hanged if you think that their artworks are just 'degenerate'

>child
that cherub is probably much much older than any of those girls

True, though I would want that with a slightly bigger dick anyways.

at the very least you get to experience your good taste in women and art first hand.

>protestants showing muslim behaviour again
Thanks Luther

My son is alpha as fuck, rename him to Ajax or Heracles

carve my flint rock into an orgasm

It's not rape if i want to be raped.

...

STOP LOOKING AT THE VENUS OF WILLINDORF

...

god i wish that were me

>tfw when we have the same face and body

This is child pornography. This painting needs to be burned.

It's just a drawing, user. They're not real.

>ywn be a little kid and get molested by a qt grill

goodsmile.info/en/product/5571/figma Venus de Milo.html

youtu.be/wKkPqrFXYG8

user, you should browse /toy/ more often

>Same dick, too

...

...

Jews(Christians) have always had complicated relations with noses.

Greek and Roman art has been erotically nice.

*BRAAAAAAAAPPPP*

they're real in my imagination though

The only one who got a happy ending. He's kinda /r9k/ or /pol/ too, as he refused to marry and fall in love because the women of his island all acted like degenerate whores.

>tfw Aphrodite will never have pity on us and grant waifus to deliver us from escapism
>tfw Aphrodite will never punish roasties by turning them into stone

>The only one who got a happy ending
>happy ending
Did you mean kallipygos?

...

>tfw remembering that one time when i was like 4 or 5 and my older sister brought her friend over and she started messing with my hair and kissing me
come to think of it that's probably the last time a non-family member kissed me

RIP user

>tfw chicks wanted to play with my hair as a teenager and I always said no thinking that shit was gay

Creative women in their 30s-40s have always been attracted to me as a teenager [spoiler]and they still are, but I'm too much of a pussy to initiate anything[/spoiler]
>tfw got stares in public
>tfw was my art teacher's favorite student
>tfw gave a woman from my church a firm handshake once and she started getting friendly with me from then on

post a pic of yourself

>she's better without what she was originally designed to have
Hipster?

Study it

Thanks man

>tfw girls want to play with my hair in college all the time and I say yes usually
Having your hair stroked by a girl feels fucking amazing, man. Like fuck, that shit puts me to sleep, it's so damn relaxing.
It helps that my hair is apparently really soft.

Same, it induces some pretty damn intense ASMR

.
Practice on my harp

Not him, but have you read anything Greek? Anything Roman? They are quite literally the definition of degenerates.

That's a strange way to say man of taste.

Nice ass. Good job, Graeco-Romans.

...

that's why he never had time to answer prayers