Veeky Forums has ruined my life

Veeky Forums has ruined my life.

About a year ago I entered college. It was a new beginning for me. I learned to dress myself, lost 50 pounds, and by the end of the year I was an active member of many clubs. I even co-founded a movie club, and co-lead some backpacking trips in the outdoors club. My grades were better than ever.

But academics were not the reason I enrolled at that college. In high school, I met a girl who I have loved ever since. Typical “oneitis”. I was a loser in high school, and just barely managed to scrape by academically. Come senior year I knew she was going to attend a college across the country, she had her heart set on it. Maybe it was stupid but I followed, and played it off like it was a coincidence.
But once I got there I took on a life of my own. At times I barely even thought about her. She stayed with her high school boyfriend the first semester, so over time I almost gave up on her.

Protip: you DO lose the ability to fall in love, so if u dont get your oneitis youre pretty much fucked

Buy DGB

During that spring semester I first found Veeky Forums. I took the small savings I had from my work study job and started playing around with Crypto. Of course, during that time everything went up. I slowly grew a nice portfolio of savings.
Everything was going well, until she came back into my life.

Around that time I reconnected with my crush. She’d broken up with her old boyfriend over the break. We had a class together. One week she missed all classes – then, to my surprise, she messaged me. My heart skipped a beat. She said her grandmother had died, and she had flown back for the funeral. I agreed to let her copy my notes to catch up when she came back. I pretended to be sad too but really I was overjoyed. I sold off my ETH (big mistake in retrospect, but still made a profit), and bought myself some new clothes and cologne.

The day she came over to study, we ended up talking for a long time. She mentioned that her grandmother had some savings that were left for her. So now she had several thousand dollars she wanted to invest. Excited, I started telling her about cryptocurrency and Veeky Forums. She looked sort of confused but agreed to let me manage her savings (some ~$20k). She said I was always so smart an such a caring friend.

I decided to stay here (Oregon) over the summer. At this time I started to get more involved with Crypto than ever. Now I had $20k to work with. In May and June I was riding high, and even took some profit for myself. I started spending every day just browsing Veeky Forums trying to scope out the next big thing. I lived for the thrill of that moonshot. I started drinking lots of energy drinks and pulling all nighters watching the market.

For the fourth of July I planned a big camping trip and invited my crush along. It was gonna be a whole week and I had all that time to impress her.

Before I left I put it all in NAV, Golem, and Zcash.

It was shaping up to be a great trip but on the 4th, when launching off some fireworks, I decided to show off and hold the mortar in my hands. I held it upwards in the air and some embers flew off and down onto my head. A bunch of my hair got burnt and I got a permanent scar on my eyelids. And not a cool scar, a shitty one that makes me look like I have a lazy eye.

This pasta again LOL

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When I got back from the trip, my portfolio was a sea of red. I’d lost almost a third of its value. I grabbed a trashcan and threw up. I decided my best option was to hold – I didn’t want to be the “buy high sell low” biz meme.

I held until the end of July, but it was too much. At that point I had halved my crush’s inheritance. Whenever she asked about it I told her it was going really well. Every lie I told a little piece of me died.

I started to daytrade again, even worse than before. I’d get drunk, and try to work my magic, but I couldn’t get it back. I took up chain smoking cigrettes to keep myself awake. I figured I’d put half of the money in ETH as a safe bet but that went nowhere but down. I tried to get on board the NEO train but I ended up buying at the top. Meanwhile, the money I put aside for day trading was eaten up by fees and poor decisions.

In late August I met with my crush for coffee. I thought it was a date but she just wanted to hear about the investments. She said I didn’t sound healthy, that I my eyes looked exhausted. At that point I ended up throwing up all over the floor and her shoes (I had stayed up all night and had a hangover). Once that was cleaned up she asked to actually see her investments. I assured her nothing was wrong and promised to give her back the money if she was worried. She politely said she wanted it back.

Around that time my parents wired me the money to pay for my rent and tuition. You guessed it - $20k. My parents are not particularly well off so I always feel guilty about taking their money.

I took the 20k my parents wired me and combined it with the leftover 3k so it looked like I’d delivered a return on investment. I cleaned myself up, put on my best clothes and some nice cologne, and went to meet my crush. This was it. When she saw what I’d done she’d definitely kiss me. Maybe we’d order drinks and go home together. Everything I’d done, however painful or stupid, had brought me to this point, to this one chance.

We met again and I transferred the cash to her account. She told me I was looking better, complimented me on how thin I'd gotten. When I showed her the money she was so impressed. She told me: “Just wait until my boyfriend hears about this! You should meet him, user. He’s a finance major, you could talk to him about this stuff!”

It’s been a week since then Veeky Forums. I just went straight home and haven't showered or changed my clothes since. I don’t have the money to pay next month’s rent. I haven’t been going to classes and the university will probably unenroll me when I’m too late on paying tuition. I’ve just been sitting around chain-smoking and drinking energy drinks and browsing Veeky Forums. I haven’t talked to anyone or eaten anything in days.

What do I do? I have about $150 left, so soon I cant afford groceries anymore. Who can help me out? My BTC is
1DyofywVBPNE7yVY4MqMomkRexLrtmCDUw and my ETH is 0xfC2Da792012765D2ED245F1AB71245d7a40d4b6c . Or maybe do something good with your left-over bags/shitcoins and drop them on me? Please?