Lied on resume like Veeky Forums recommended

>lied on resume like Veeky Forums recommended
>Got an interview and then job offer
>They want to check my references through a thirdparty company
Am I fucked? What do I do?

say nothing, and keep on applying for other jobs.

>What do I do?
Get fired. Move onto the next interview, but make sure the lies can't be proven one way or the other.
Or just be honest and get shitty job offers.

So do I decline the offer? I was more curious if there was some way to avoid the check.

Congrats on getting your interview. Now do it again.

Give them my number. I will pretend to be your former boss. And I will say so many good things about u. (Why don't we form a network like this?)

don't worry about it, those 3rd party ref checkers are scams.

if any shit goes down, just say shit like 'that's wierd' keep answers short.

If you pay me a few bucks, OP -- I can reference for you. I'll even give you a personal number once we are in contact.

I'm an American with a idiosyncratic accent, so it's hard to identify where I'm from.
Also, best piece of advice: never listen to Veeky Forums unless their pockets are on the line with yours.

If you're suave enough you can talk them into not needing to check, but since you're here on Veeky Forums I can see that's obviously not the case ;^)

No, don't decline shit. Just accept it then play ignorant when your bullshit comes up. Maybe you'll get hired. What lies did you use exactly?

How egregiously did you lie on your resume?

Kek really? It seems pretty legit.
How should I respond when the shit obviously doesn't pass?

Claimed to work at companies I never did like Veeky Forums told me to. So do I just accept and if it goes south try to damagecontrol while accepting not getting hired?

>Claimed to work at companies I never did like Veeky Forums told me to.

That was pretty dumb. No matter how far you went with that company, if they ever learned you lied on your resume they'd fire you immediately.

I mean, okay, you got an interview and an offer. I don't know, user. You might just be kicking your problem down the line because you'll just get fired in a couple weeks.

It's company procedure, not really sure how anyone could talk themselves out of it.

You can go to jail for that. Kek

You guys convinced me it was safe...

Anyways, do I just decline offer or accept and see how it plays out?

You have the right to decline to allow them to background check you, they are also allowed to rescind your offer because of that.

>Claimed to work at companies I never did like Veeky Forums told me to. So do I just accept and if it goes south try to damagecontrol while accepting not getting hired?

That's a bad move. What the third party companies do is call HR at the companies on your resume and ask for information about you. Proof of employment, start and end dates, official title. If you lied about working at a place, they'll say they have no record of you working there, and that's that.

they seem legit to make money from the co's that hire them. the co's that hire them are simply covering their own ass in case shit goes down.

honestly all they do is make a couple of phone calls. when shit doesn't check out, just say 'hmmm that's very strange' if they accuse you of lying just act offended and politely tell them perhaps it's best if you decline their job offer. This puts the ball back in their court. either 1. they come back and offer the job. 2. your don't get the job (and you weren't going to anyway). it leaves doubt in their mindeither way so you're not bruning bridges.

honestly, you'll be fine though.

Told you

Fucking told every single one of you who suggested lying on a resume, that it was a shit idea.

I ran one of those "third party companies", I did background checks on people all over the world. It's embarrassing as fuck, and trust me it ain't worth it. You never know - you'll probably get caught, move onto a different company, and in five years time the interviewer at the last role could become your new boss. What the fuck do you do then, huh?

Stupid fucking useless nonsense, lying on a resume. Go and work hard like everyone else to earn your merit.

I started a business so I could get experience, I had to work 14 to 16 hour days for 7 years, working two jobs and studying a double degree just so I could get into a comfy position.

Go and achieve what you want on your resume through hard work - you'll learn so fucking much, and become so much more of a better person. Don't fucking lie like a cop out. Always makes me laugh when people said "pffft I'm never going to get fucking caught".

The amount of times I investigated people retrospectively, and the amount of times they had to pay back large sums of income or face law-suits, because they committed fraud, was astonishing. And the one thing they all had in common was the "pfff, they aren't going to fucking know" attitude. Every single one.

Such a joke. OP I hope you learnt your lesson early on, retard.

Yes I understand. But I'm asking how is best to play this situation. Simply say "No thank you" and bail on the job... or take the background check and hope it somehow doesn't stop them from hiring or maybe just claim "Huh that's weird"? (As the other user said)

Great suggestion. This is a smart idea, what I was looking for.

"Huh that's weird?" Is not the response they're going to make.

>applicant applies
>applicant gets interviewed
>applicant is successful in interview
>applicant needs background check
>applicant drops out

How do you think this looks?

He's saying that's the response he, the potential employee, is going to make.
Kek

No I meant I make that response. (Insinuating my records may have gotten lost)

I don't think it looks better. People get other offers all the time. I haven't said yes yet.

I don't know how they talked you into it, but it's not safe. Either short- or long-term. It's very unsafe.

Anyway, I think you ought to keep looking for work. I'm not gonna say turn it down, but I think accepting it is just gonna put you back in the same position in a few weeks.

>. So do I just accept and if it goes south try to damagecontrol while accepting not getting hired

They'll just let you know they're not hiring you or won't say anything at all. They won't give you a fake offer.

What do you have to lose? You're probably fucked if you didn't put reliable references (friends). For your next resume put companies that have gone out of business. Do some research.

ignore this guy, hes a cuck :

>applicant needs background check
>applicant drops out

They might think this, but they won't be able to prove anything, nor will it matter.

All OP has to say is he's accepting an offer elsewhere.

People made many stories about how they lied for their jobs. Examples of highranking Executives(even CEOs) who lied, etc. The logic honestly made sense.

I still think it makes sense, I just got unlucky because I'm assuming the vast majority of businesses don't waste money on such an expense. At least that I've experienced.

No friends :(
>inb4 try r9k

The companies that have gone out of business is an interesting idea though. Not too sure how I'd find them however, I did hear this idea a few times on this board.

Make a Google Voice number that goes to voicemail. Pay someone on fiverr to create a voice message for you. Most people won't even bother calling the number. Just apply for other jobs.

You can Google them. What type of job are you applying for specifically?

Be smart about it and make sure your refs are legit but non traceable dead-ends. Companies that went under, merged, got massively reorganized, anything that makes it too great of a pain in the ass to verify.

Billing manager for a transport company...

Haven't had much luck finding shutdown businesses not sure how to do it.

>Billing manager
>lied to get the job

They'll fire you in a split second when they find out.

Very good advice. Noted.

lol, m8, you're not the fucking CIA.

I have personally gone through these checks with no problems.

Oh well it was worth a try.

THAT'S EVEN WORSE

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

"WHOOPS, MY RECORDS ARE GONE"

JESUS

Yeah that happens.

You can work around this by letting them call and if they say they couldn’t find your employment record, tell you worked for a subsidiary of said company which has since been acquired and that this might be the reason why there is no record. The background check firm will then ask for other proof of employment like w2 or payslips which you can photoshop.

I’ve done similar things at big 4 tech companies before. But ffs dont get caught and if you think you can’t pull it off, just decline the offer. Don’t let word get around that you’re a liar.

And next time don’t be an idiot and lie about the easily verified stuff.

CIA? the fuck? Did I say I surreptitiously smuggle arms to rebel fighters in strange places?

It doesn't take special 'CIA meme triangle intelligence analysis' to determine if someone's being dishonest. It's extremely simple to refute the veracity of a claim if the claim isn't accurate.

>"Hey! My name's 'x', I'm calling from 'y' corp about your previous employee 'z' who had experiencing managing 'a', 'b' and 'c'?"
>"oh hi um yeah, but he didn't manage anything, he was 'x position'
>Oh okay sorry my mistake, bye!

>someone claims to have a degree in business finance
>their degree says it's a bachelor of economics with a minor in business finance

>says the three-year gap in employment history is due to travel
>social media indicates they never even left their house during that period

>applying for a trusted position with privileged access to sensitive records
>has criminal associates, clean record but engages in criminal activity

One dude I caught was applying for a daycare centre. He had a clean record, police clearance, years of experience, good education and a working with children check. I found the same email he put on his resume in a chat log between a pedophile and a 12 year old - he was trying to solicit nude images from her.

It's not just 'hurrr CIA hack the mainframe' shit our company did, we determined the veracity of claims and investigated backgrounds of people working with vulnerable persons, or working in privileged positions.

By far, the most consistent finding was that of embellished resumes. Every employer understands that you're going to polish your own shit, but no employer will trust someone who *proactively lies*, conceals or obfuscates the nature of their experience.

That requires retardation though.

How the hell would you know if someone's associates are criminals?

>Putting an email you use for something illegal on your resume

why would they find out? don't be a pussy! that sounds pretty specialized though, you can do it, right? is it an accountant?

When the company checks references they'll know I didn't work there and unless one of the unlikely excuse ITT works or they for some reason decide to overlook it then they'll just pick another candidate.

How would you know if someone's associates are criminals? Easy. Social media
>multiple, recent and old photos of individual and associate together having fun or doing something
>mutliple, consistent engagement between the two people
>stated friendships
>attending each other's weddings and parties, their children are friends, their partners are friends, they're regularly at each other's houses
>one of them is a known drug king-pin with multiple criminal convictions and lengthy legal history

How is that so hard to understand? They associate with each other, and one of them is a criminal.

>Putting an email you use for something illegal on your resume
I know right, THAT is what requires retardation.

Oh that's what you meant. Well that's quite extreme.

Bump.

This. Just call their bluff and remain chill. It's like drug tests. I know many degenerate potheads who passed their drug tests because to save money companies don't actually test every sample and mainly rely on a drug test as a deterrent.

Risky idea. If you fail the check arent you blacklisted?

Probably not. Most of these reference company's are incompetent.

Pepe stolen