Fix the Middle East

more bob and vegene

>thinks anatolia is in the ME.
thinks about to fix it.

Give it all back to the Ottomemes

The ottoman family had their time, the time of empires is over now.

>United States, China, India
>Not Empires in their own right

toppu kekku

Create Kurdistan out of traditional Kurdish regions of surrounding countries.
Unite all of Arabia into one country.
Dismantle Iraq and Syria and add them into Arabia.

There, I fixed the Middle-East. THIS IS A FLAWLESS PLAN.

There you go.

The united states is more like a hegemony instead of a multicultural empire who rules over others who were conquered.
China might be one but as far as I know india is a democratic republic.

Who would rule this arabia because if you say saudis it won't work.

Remove Israel

Give them science and they'll get rid of religions as an endemic problem. It's so much a pleasure to think freely, and gives such good outcomes for daily life, that one doesn't need to comfort oneself into theories about universe.

Nuke the Arabian Peninsula
Other countries will fix themselves when they are gone.

What about westerners and their goals?

Let Egypt rule Arabia.

>Iran went to shit because CIA made a coup which killed off the royal family and set up religious fanatics.

Iran went to shit because that royal family was put into power, ALSO a CIA coup, displacing the previous democratic government. All for muh oil.

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t.pajeet

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Congratulations! Enjoy your centuries-long nuclear winter, mass starvation and collapse of civilization!

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>Saudi Arabia
Was always shit.

Iran went to shit because the USA cannot tolerate non-OPEC puppets. The Shah was also no longer being an OPEC puppet and the USA backed Khomeini:

wikileaks.org/plusd/cables/1975STATE163771_b.html

theguardian.com/world/2016/jun/10/ayatollah-khomeini-jimmy-carter-administration-iran-revolution

>non-OPEC puppets
OPEC leaders being non-puppets*

Whoever made this image is funny.... they spared Turkey who caused way more damage to Western Europe than any of the other destroyed countries.

Hashemites beat the Sauds.

Find an energy source that outperforms fossil fuels, hopefully something renewable. The region losses any semblence of power and disintegrates into petty squabbling irrelevant places.

This.
Hasemites > Saudis, but where do the Rashidis come into play?

You still have the Suez Canal going through there with one of the busiest shipping lanes.

Then there is the fact that whenever a dunecoon is blowing up some western people we have to
go there and liberate their poor country

And the threat of them acquiring nuclear weapons and chimping out on a scale that is not acceptable to the civilized world

How would they get nuclear weapons if they cant buy them, or buy the research? The only reason that place is significant today is oil. That alone is enough reason to turn to renewable sources of energy, why let yourself be dependent of warlike clans masquerading as states?

Wipe out the entire Arabian peninsula circa 570 AD.

>enforce strict military regimes at all locations where oil is found
There you go.
Now the Middle East doesn't have the easy money, pressure source against the rest of the world and they can develop nicely.
Also, control all strategic points, such as the Suez and don't even debate the option of leaving them.

A new caliphate is the only solution

Collapse the Solar System.
I don't need it. You neither.
Arabian Peninsula solved.

G-D

No problem. Fuck it.

Lucifer, the Devil, and Satan

Create Kurdistan from Kurdish parts of Turkey and Iraq, Kurds are moved from Turkey into the smaller Turkish territorial concession. Split the rest of Iraq into two Shiite and Sunni republics. The sunni Iraq forms a greater arab state with Syria and Jordan and Kuwait.
Saudi Arabia takes the United Arab Emirates.
Encourage Arab nationalism.

Remove Islam, firebomb Mecca, genocide and expel Muslims into a tiny corner.

The entirety of eastern and central Iraq should just be joined with Iran, that way majority of the world's Shia are living in one state. Also Baghdad being rightful Persian clay anyways.

Iran went to shit because of the Pahlavis. NuIran is indisputably better.

The Diadochi had the right idea with military colonies as did the Romans with the legionary land-allotments.
Just imagine being a poor Thracian spear-chucker (it's not offensive if that's literally your profession) and then being given a grant of fresh new land and access to the hottest Levantine thots in exchange for doing what you love (chucking spears at people). In the end, you have a permanent military presence in the area, a venue for cultural diffusion and greater understanding between two peoples, the opportunity for your average man to partake in the masculine art of Imperium, an avenue for wayward sons to find their place in a world outside the one they grew up in and more importantly, the pleasure of Middle-Eastern women.
There's a solution that fulfills a man's desire to conquer then civilize without massacring muzzies because you just hate them.
Basically, this.

This desu

Go away ISIS.

t. Shayan Ali Reza Khorasani

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I don't think it is, but it's in OP's map and you know many people use Middle East and ancient Muslim world as synonyms.

Besides, why would fixing it necessarily have to do with their own borders?

t. Al-hussein Al-qaedi-al-Jihadi Mohammad Bombadi

Give everything to Israel

the city was built by the abbasids tho

t. Yihud Muhsixmillionstein

They already have America

Its literally based off and even used foundations and material from Ctesiphon and Babylon though. Also wasn't that part of Iraq still largely populated by non-Arabs?

it was (still now) populated by indiginous iraqis. apparently. it was however built by some buddhist persian dude.

draft americans for boot-on-the-ground warfare

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In this universe, Egypt gets fucked almost as hard as Arabia.

>leaving egypt, turkey, iran and kurdistan alone
this seems random.

Give it all to Israel, watch the desert bloom

Stop using oil. Either the middle east will adapt and Saudis/Iran/America/Russia will have no more reasons to fund terrorists, or they will kill each other off.

>russia funding terrorists
excuse me

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russia funds iran/syria which fund hezbollah/hamas/islamic jihad/taliban (yes really)/etc. which are terrorists despite what the /pol/ muslims say. Same as US funding saudis/qatar who fund ISIS/Nusra/etc.

>these buttmad arabs

al quds will never be muslim clay again

>russia funds iran/syria
yes
>who fund etc etc etc
so russia doesn't fund terrorists

US doesn't fund ISIS then

>Invade.
>Set up colonial government.
>Break all the current power structures.
Do you really think the native population would be okay with that? You'll have more extremist pop up then ever before and you'll justify them because they'll go "kuffars are controlling our lands and we'll never be free". It doesn't fucking help that the US has terrible track record so far with it's involvement.

>Improve education.
>Set up exchange programs with western students.
What do you mean "improve education"? Gulf shitters already hire so many consultants and how their universities are very westernized and they have accreditation for engineering. Iran has one of the top universities and have many women who have doctors.

>they simply keep it "stable" by paying off a strong man.
This I agree. Instead of giving money to the right organizations or people, they simply just hire dictators.

Rest of the thread is shit.

The fault is not the oil, it's just the politics that's fucking everything up and the culmination of these shitty politics for like decades.

except they actually do. they have a history of it too, mujaheddin in afghanistan

>countries that have vast amounts of resources and populations
>not empires

You just described how all this started...

...Granted, it was kinda going well, for little while there. Then Israel happens, and folks either decided they wanted pan-arabism, or wanted to play various arabs off one another, both promoting fundamentalist fanaticism as a tool, and well, shit show ever since.

We Turks are coming for your Jew gold, Shlomo.

FIXED
I
X
E
D

Except that this has never actually worked in practice.

>tfw Sassanian Persia is back

patrician tier

like half of turkey's weapons are israeli made

The Turkish warrior shall not be blackmailed.

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Fixed. Crimea nations are not Hohols. Return back to Hohols Crimea isn't possible - Crimea nations would be repressed and jailed

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This is what fucked it up in the first place, lmao

>Peter L
What an absolute madman

>Yemen
And tell me how giving the entire peninsula to a burning dumpster fire of a failed state half controlled by Houthis would be better user?

>houthis
>bad
they're the only decent people in the peninsula.

So a win-win?

Don't get involved anymore, just let them sort things out

Build a wall. But instead of a wall to keep others out, it's built around the ME to keep them in.

Let them form a united arab superstate, then go to war with it and utterly destroy them as fighting actual states is something we know how to do.

The pyramid just got one skull higher!

I appreciate how Greece now has a majority Turkish population by Istanbul alone, not even counting the rest which tip it into absurdity.

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Proper colonialism has never been tried.

You know the mongols used siege weapons after conquering the Jin, right? Walls just delay the inevitable