That One Guy Thread

That's a waste of time how can you avoid falling asleep? 3 hours damn

What's wrong with recording every set in your phone?

Idk man, just put on an audiobook and ignore the clock. Pretty easy once you get used to it.

Then again I walk around in the mountains by myself for ten hours a day four days a week, so it comes naturally to just keep walking.

holy shit, can't you fucks go to the gym more than twice before you start shitposting?? will it really kill you??

>Mfw I was doing 90+ db on decline bench today.

I don't understand why this pisses you off. That said, I sweat like a son of a bitch but I clean up after myself. Stop hating me for making gains.

>90+ db
This is not hard after a few months of consistent lifting, why do u hate me

Your gym uses magnets for weights?

Do go on....

I don't

I'm talking about the people that do bicep workouts with 90+ weight. Not benches and chest workouts.

Then learn to specify you fucking heathen. I bet you hate guys that do supersets or drop sets too huh.

Who thw fuck can do biceps work outs with that much weight?

>that guy that wears a hat indoors

I will load up a bar to 135 to start my strip sets with curls. It's only for one rep but hey, still counts. I think he's talking about db though and I can't do 90's for curls. Never tried cause it is retarded.

...what?

Wow someone on fit I wouldn't mind having a drink with. Magic is real.

never heard of using magnets for it,but microplates are a thing. My gym recently got a set for the power rack.

My gym get microplates some months ago, I'm glad some niggers haven't stolen them yet

Why do you go to the gym for cardio if you cardio plenty anyways? Why not lift to balance it out?

>That one guy who judges every tiny thing other people do at the gym he goes to on a Tunisian basket weaving forum

> that one guy who drank water in between his sets

Tfw i got kicked out of the corporate gym for wearing socks (actually that was the only day ever that i forgot my shoes but still wanted to go do my session)

> that one fucking manlet wearing his cap backwards
EVERY
TIME

>that one guy that got away

> that one guy who stuck his finger up your bum when you were asstograss on your squat

>that one guy that pulls down his shorts and flashes you when no one is looking

>that guy who squat without a buttplug

>that one guy who regularly works out and is fit but still can't get laid because he suffers from autism
basically all of you guys

A buttplug? Ew bro wtf are you gay or something? you're supposed to use a squat plug they help activate your gluten.

>The one motherfucker that walks in front of you while you're doing curls

>Inb4 Dae all you do is curls

Fuck off

>don't using both

It's like if you really don't want to make it

A buttplug works as a cheap alternative for beginners

Beginner?
I can squat 400lb bitch

>has tourettes and is constantly contoring his face
>both avoids and makes uncomfortable eye contact
Me.

Implying you bench 225.

>>That one guy who uses 90+ pound free weights
I don't get this
As in any guy who lifts over 1pl8 with non machine lifts?

>that guy who comes running to tell you he's using the equipment you want to use then you go ok m8 i'll wait and then he runs back to the other side of the gym to use other equipment so you just use the equipment again and he comes over and wtfs and you ask him why you over there and then he says he's doing a circuit and is using the equipment I want to use in 3 exercises
I just stared at him and continued my workout with the equipment

>Tourettes and is constantly contouring his face

Ive never met anyone like me before, I felt like I was the only one

I take peoples equipment on "circuits" all the time. If i need an incline bench and the only one available is in a smith machine with nobody around it recently ill straight up take it. Circuits are crossfit tier. People come back and notice the bench is gone and do nothing.

He just saw that you forgot your squat plug. He's helping you bro.

>that guy taking pictures of himself to post on anonymous forums

Get around my cutting diet faggots. This shit only cost me like $40 a week too

Micro plates have been literally the best thing for my OHP. Was stalling for months. Gym owner brings in microplates (cost him $10 for 6). OHP increases by 15% within 6 weeks.
Microplates are GOAT

> tfw you now OHP what you used to squat

Bretty sure 33 eggs ain't 28g of brotein bro

i hate faggots who wear gay ass sport shirts

>all those guys who drink from plastic bottles

fools. Glass bottle master race.

although one time I saw someone break a glass bottle in the gym, that'd be pretty awkward if it happened to me.

Been using glass for years now. Never fucking going back. Cheap, easy to clean, and doesn't hold smell or anything. I replaced all of my shit with glass. Glass food storage, glass bottles, glass mixing bowls, glass or metal bakeware. Fuck plastic.

Also went from nonstick pans to Steel. Keep a small nonstick for over easy eggs though, I couldn't ever get it right with metal.

>that one guy who dies in a sauna

I just get a Snapple once every 2 or 3 weeks and then use that bottle to drink from until the cap starts to rust or it starts to smell funky. Works pretty well.

Not even the right thread, but cheers. I think I had it as 4 and changed it. thanks again bro

>that fit girl who smiles, waves, and mires at me but I'm too autismo to say anything to her

Just cheat a little and make it a half-push press until you're less weak.

lost it

One nigger did deads at the bench press rack. Like... he just stood in front of it, took the bench barbell and deadlifted. I just stared at him and waited... wanted to see if he'd come to a realisation but no, he just diddied away. The deadlift rack was avaliable.

Another guy did curls and deads in the squat rack, and again the deadlift rack was avaliable. I tried explaining to him why he should maybe consider not doing that and he looked at me like I had three heads.

Enjoy your phytoestrogens, BPAs and all that

My gym buddy does that. He says it's cause his hair looks like ass in the morning though.

>glass
>bpa
??

I hammer curl 90s...

that guy that urinates in the steam room

>implying youre big enough to hate on twinks

I used to dead and squat in socks before finding chucks.

>magnetic weights to add to his OHP
That's genius, actually
Why didn't I ever think of that?

>that guy who lifts in a flatbrim hat

why not casein instead of the cottage cheese

>that guy who wears a fucking hat

Nothing screams insecurity about baldness like wearing a fucking hat to your workout

but cottage cheese is casein...

what kind of beta unironically wipes their sweat

>that guy who grunts loudly despite not lifting heavy

>that old guy who starts chatting with you in the sauna

> that one guy who asks if you need a spotter so he can take over your bench unofficially

Grr leave me alone let me finish in peace

>That one fucking guy who has been on the treadmill from the time you got in to the time when you finish 2 hours later

i dont know how to feel about them i just dont understand

>that guy who plays Pokémon go between sets

>90+ pound free weights
Do you mean dumbbells? There is literally nothing wrong with using heavy dumbbells.

>that guy shitting up the bench for a half hour shitposting on 4 chin

Post arms you cunt.

>That one guy who counts out loud.

>that one guy doing half squats
>that one guy on the elliptical, using the one next to him for a cup holder.

IKTF

>the guy who hogs the squat rack for more than just squats forever
>x2 if he's doing it with a friend and talking with him for half an hour between sets

>hiking for 40 hours a week
>somehow still have a beer belly

>That old guy that literally looks like Jonny Knoxville in old guy costume and constantly looks like he's about to die

>that guy who grunts loudly despite not lifting heavy

I'm that guy. Fuck you. It's not heavy for you, it is for me. That's how the gym work.

That guy who asks you to spot him in a few minutes and never asks.

I was literally waiting to move because I felt like an asshole if i walked away

It's a thing man....I've been lifting for a year and still have one

I'm skinny fat, and WAS drinking a lot.

>That one guy who just stands there talking to someone for 40 minutes in front of the weight rack, literally right where you need to get your weights

That has been me a few times now, not 40 minutes but maybe 20 mins. I've even been asked by one guy to move. But I don't do it on purpose, I swear. This gay guy keeps coming up to me to talk and I first met him when I was new to the gym and shy, I didn't want to be rude so I just say hello back to the guy. Over the months he wants to talk more and more and I'm too polite to tell him to fuck off and that a simple hello is more than enough. I fucking dread seeing him now because he wants to have big chats but I just don't have the heart to tell him no, I dug my own grave in this. The gay guy asked me to come camping too, but I turned him down and he looked really disappointed.

>tfw you're about to do squats, but the gay guy comes over to chat to you.
>tfw 15 minutes later some other guy comes over and asks if i'm gonna use that and i say all yours because i don't wanna be rude to him either

fml, i wish i wasn't so beta when dealing with people.

>So if I bench 225, you have a problem with me?

Well if you bench 225 you won't be able to use 90 pound dumbbells so yeah

>that short guy who stares at you

Literally no one on earth does bicep workouts with 90 dumbbells

>that one guy on the elliptical, using the one next to him for a cup holder.
????

Sorry

He's tryna fuck you.

no you don't

>that guy who blows snot out his nose when lifting heavy
>that guy who quarter squats
>that guy lifts his shirt and shows off his big round gross gut with abs on top
>that guy with a big back but literal pancake titties