Alexander the Great was a violent murderer so he has to suffer in the seventh circle of hell

suicide seems to be the worst for me
you become a fucking tree for g*d's sake
and there's that cool punishment where you become a snake and have to bite people

being chewed by Lucifer for all eternity sounds pretty bad to me

It literally is though, do you think any major christian denominations has accepted his works as canonical? Are any of the claims he made based off of some esoteric interpretation of the bible or from newly discovered ancient passages like the Dead Sea Scrolls? No they fucking weren't. He literally just states that he had a vision and went straight into the fan-fic without feeling the need to give his writing any sort of authenticity or official backing. Its pretty much the Book of Mormon except that rather than trying to be a new-age testament of the Holy Word its just some crazy ramblings that where just vivid and interesting enough to garner the attention of edgy teenagers and hack writers who ran out of original ideas to "reinterpret" into their own novels.

nah atleast you keep your body
and the cold makes you numb

you unironically believe someone traveled to inferno purgatorio and fucking paradiso and came back to write his wonderful voyage?

i never really understood the greedy and wasteful (how does prodighi translates?) punishment, yeah ok pushing rocks is not fun but calling it a hellish torment is kinda meh

>self-insert fan fiction

I watch Zero Punctuation also.

It is almost like Justinian was a Roman.

Calling it fanfiction is reductive and anachronistic. Literally every work of fiction is influenced by other writer's works, and while most people have the decency and common sense to not go around calling Moby Dick "whaling fanfiction" or "Old Testament fanfiction" whenever you bring up Dantes or Milton there's always some idiot who calls it "fanfiction" like they're the cleverest fucker since Albert Einstein. Newsflash, throwing idiotic buzzwords around makes you look like an idiot.

no one said it's not a masterpiece of poetry or anything, simply that its contents have a good amount of arbitrary plot decisions
fanfiction is pretty rude yeah, but well we are on a slovakian traps are not gay anime posting degenerated site so yeah you know

Especially when "self insert" is a common technique in Medieval fiction. Chaucer does it in Canterbury Tales, Langland does it in Piers Plowman etc.

The Inferno was just Dante's fapfiction and they all had a massive boner for old Julius back then

Fanfiction IS pretty fitting though, it's an original creation expanding or reinterpreting previous work for no other reason than to materialize a strong affinity and enthusiasm for it. A fanatics' fiction.

>being a flatterer is worse than being a murderer
and yet there are people on this forum who often claim we are not so different from medieval man

>Brutus burns in the very centre of Hell for all eternity alongside his co-conspirators
Feels good desu

It's just von Däniken type theory of how thins would work.

A murderer is responsible for one death. A flatterer can be responsible for thousands and the ruin of kingdoms.

What makes it fan fiction however is
>His girlfriend is so great that she manages to get him a grand tour through the afterlife
>His girlfriend is so great that she gets a seat next to God
>While in the after life he gets to meet all of his favorite poets. Including his favorite Virgil who also guides him
>Punishment is decided by him and not God

>murder two people
Theres nothing we can do chief, he's clean.

Didn't Dante also put Cato above Caesar in his ranking system?

The real story of Dante and Beatrice is increadibly sad.

Prodighi translates to prodigal. A more common word would be wasteful, spendthrift, or extravagant.