Oh Look who left his cave! user why are you always alone in your room and never bring a girl home?

*unzips katana*
You 3D Semen Demons have 10 seconds to leave the room so I can watch Naruto Shippudden on the HDTV or you will feel the cold hard blade of my katana penetrate your uteruses.

>drinking soda

dropped

Stupid nerd

They probably don't really have a terrible opinion of you, since you don't really interact with them.

If I had a sister I would have sex with all her friends
...
Thats just how alpha I am Veeky Forums

>Oh, hey Miranda

user I'm your sister

Fucking cringe.

this is literally why i dont leave my dorm room
its probably too late to salvage any social life anyway

...

Delete yourself my man

Ew GROSS, user!

I don't know why I keked so hard

I'm gay t.thatyoutubeguy

are they hot?

are you considering peep holes?

>3D Semen Demons

my fucking sides

THIS

made me chuckle

>Say nothing
>Find a seat
>Pull my dick out
>Slowly masturbate while they watch me

Real Edgy Bro Wow

the best response

r3ddit fuck off

I have and am still trying. But all the girls I've come across so far have turned me down for all sorts of different reasons. In dating as well the rest of my life, I'm doing the best I can, but my 110% only ever gets me 55% there so fate will have to meet me at the half way point.

Who even talks like that? Whatever, I'm going to the salsa club. Anyone coming? No? Ok, have fun!

>At my sister
>Go to her semi-hot roommate's room and start talking to her
>She is covering her belly with her arm the whole time
>Obviously feels threatened
>Ask her if she still has a BF
>She says she broke up
>Does that hair thingy, and removes arm
>I-I'm going now.. b-bye

Because I have negative canthal tilt and a recessed maxilla and can't afford the surgery to fix them so I rot on Lookism and /r9k/ for 16+ hours a day to cope with my subhuman existence

...

I would if I could.

...

It's never too late. The longer you wait the harder.

If your lazy ass took half your shit posting time a day to work at a job, you could easily save for surgery. Stop making excuses you subhuman.

rather rot than wagecel and get bossed around by a Chad who treats me worse than the Chad and normie employees

The guy with the 'greensboro' shirt is by FAR the best looking dude in the group why isn't he a 'slayer'

If you think that's a 6-7 you are totally delusional

also the 'slayer' guys don't you know, excite me sexually, they look like pretty boy male models that would be scared to mess up my hair. All of the 'chad' "6-7" guys are more attractive.

t.female

>people actually think this

Wew. Have fun fixing none of your issues and wasting your only life you pathetic piece of shit

the Greensboro Chad is a multimillionaire CEO nowadays (his name's Jay Gould)
incels have no chance these days

Neck yourself

Wait what? Greensboro dude is this guy?

fortune.com/2014/07/07/jay-gould-american-standard-toilets/

why are they all posing all retarded

>wips dick out
>Do neanderthal warcry
>Go on rampage

>AVAST MATEYS, LOOK WHO HAS EMERGED FROM HIS COVE

No he's this Jay Gould
youtube.com/watch?v=1rvTd5bV1gw

All those fat betas working for him tho

>mfw my parents used to talk about me like that
>i was a 300+ lb WoW addict

shameful my dad has gotta be proud of me now at least.

because they are this thing called women

Because I'm scared that when CHAD comes over to bang all 6 of you later she'll be unable to resist his hypermasc, dom, good-looking, robust presence and abandon an inferior gymcel like me

Nope.

This seems possible but he talks like a fag and he's a feminist cuck to his wife. Only way to redeem himself is if he's just a straightup sociopath and gets mad pussy on the side with that feminism schtick. Probably the case since he's a successful businessman.

I would probably walk over and eat a taco tbqh

They already know how shit your life is, so why does it even matter what you do or say

Jesus Christ how many of these fucking comics are there? Just how asspained does one have to be to keep making these?

Incel.

Noice.

Haven't seen this pic in a while but spoon girl is still my waifu

because girls are only a distraction from making it

Yup, I love tacos and ignoring guest is a breeze for me if food is involved.

I cringed so hard my face fell off.

"Ah! How the fuck did you all get into my house!? I'm calling the police"

Also I can't relate to the scenario in the OP, seems like kind of a limiting thread

I only bring home girls that I want to be a part of my life.
The rest are just fuck buddies and women who want to get fucked by a man with a decent face, nice body and a big dick.
Yeah, I'm kinda lonely, but I get my dick wet and I can talk to you when I need too.

>That blonde cutie on the right
Hnnng she's so cute I wanna talk to her

He can speed it up a bit and make it climactic

But I brought a girl home last night, she left an hour ago. What, do you think I'm some kinda weirdo that doesn't go to halloween parties and fuck all the harley quinns?

"Because I don't date girls, duh¨

because I have crippling self loathing stemming from growing up fat and any time a girl talks to me, I assume it's purely to boost her own ego at the cost of the little self confidence I have left. but since you're all here and you already made me feel like I'm about 3 inches tall asking a question like that, I do have a favor to ask; all of you, take off your socks and give them to me.

now.

Why do their faces piss me off so much?

I swear to God, women are nothing but a meme.

>"BECAUSE WOMEN ARE THE NIGGERS OF GENDER"
>cartwheel out of the room

All those girls would fall in love with me if I just stood there.

It's so easy to get girls when you have a girlfriend. They can sense when you're getting pussy, and can sense that your not desperate at all.

*scoots behind you*
*makes you feel insecure*

They want what they can't have.

...I drive...

When you're at least 5 years older than the girl you automatically get pussy too. Guys that age are so awkward, and when you walk with your chest up beaming with confidence and a smile their hearts melt and wanna suck your chad dick.

uh-uh-uh
he-ha-he
i-i-i be-be-cause i-i

>TELL ME ABOUT MYSTERY! WHY DOES HE WEAR THE MASK?

kek

L
M
A
O

or perhaps he's wondering why someone would amog a man before approaching a 2-set

*PLLLLLBBBTH*
oops I thin I made a poopoo in my pantsu!! *brap* *brap* ah!!! it burns!!
*BRAAAAAAAAAAP*
MOMMY! MOMMY! MOMMY I NEED CLEAN PANSTU WANTSU! MOMMY!
o hi there pretty ladees, I did not notice you. would you like to clean poopoo from pantsu? ok thank you. here, you lick it ok?? no, lick. here I show you how.*lick* *munch* *slllpth* mmm, yeah, poopoo so good. oh my bad preety ladies, here bon apetit.
oh!! momma, I did not see you there! is not what it look like, they wanted to do this. mommy ples stop screaming, momma ples, is not my fault that you created me, mommy stop!

>at least you can game. who are you?

It doesn't matter who we are, what matter is our DHVs

>if i pull your girl, will you die?

Im not an autist so id just say somethin cheesy like "got all my girls right here" with a smile and continue my way into the kitchen

> Delusional Autist

It would be extremely stonewalled

Because I'm 5'10 and... BASICALLY it's 2016.

Umm... hi girls haha... uh, did you know that... nice guys don't just bring girls home before taking them out to dinner? Because you should!
*moonwalks back into room*

>you're a nice guy

honestly, except for the creepy shit they probably would do, having a roommate that just appeared every now and then like that would be hilarious. Walks out, says some beta shit, and literally moonwalks back into their room.

I've known people like that, but most people stop being so autistic after high school.

Girls don't play milsims or magically appear in my room.

That sounds like an ideal roommate. One who just leaves me the fuck alone, but occasionally entertains me with their autism.

Because I don't know how to take to women

The hell do you want from me Kloie

You seem like an Eggs kind of guy.