Veeky Forums...

ITT: Penis-obsessed hominids experiencing placebo effects from meme foods

You faggots need to get a hobby -- one other than your genitals.

I'll purchase that, thank you very much. And finally, when weighing powders, do I just pour it onto the scale as is, or do I need some sort of container or something? Just to not make a mess.

Yes you can use any container on it, then use tare function.

Tare function? Some button I press and it dismisses the containers weight, I'm guessing?

Are these planting seeds or something I can find in the produce section?

Yeah, right.

Yep you got it

user, I've got a less than average sized dick and a weak cumload, you don't know the horror it is to live like this. I've watched so much porn over the years, fapping so many times a day, that something horrible started welling inside of me that I'm finally starting to realize and address. I don't know if I can even enjoy male on female porn anymore without feeling complete and utter blood boiling rage, I'm going to have to do girl only now as I work on myself.

However, my penis depression has caused me to lose 50 pounds from working out (and now I'm starting to work out 5 days out of the week), started doing kegels, alongside taking the "holy grail" of dick minerals (L-Arginine, Sunflower Lecithin, Zinc, Selenium, Pygeum, and now Celery stalks/Celery seed).

I haven't masturbated since 12/28/2016, and don't plan on doing so for at least a full month if not longer while I continue my program. My "penis-obsession" has forced me to better myself at the risk of possible suicide even. I just want to say, if you have a large dick and nice cumshot, fuck you.

I legit hate you as a person.

If you think its a placebo, try it yourself.
You would be suprised of the effects.

How do I make it taste good though? I tried with peanut butter but wasn't a fan

I'm the wrong person to ask user. I'm in full rage-mode, so I'm actually able to take the (L-Arginine, Sunflower Lecithin, and Pygeum) mix, add some water, turn it into a nasty looking muddy paste, and scarf that shit down with water as is. As for the Celery stalk, I literally eat that shit whole raw, without any preparation outside of washing it clean.

I'm too enraged and desperate to really care about taste. I'm in full monk mode now.

Stop being so obsessed with your dick and cum, women dont care much about that anyway.
In porn they always choose actors who have bick dick and large ejaculate volume, it does not represent the average population at all.

>Stop being so obsessed with your dick and cum
Fuck. You.

Try having a small dick and weak cumload and keep that sentiment up. If it wasn't for what I'm doing now to try and improve, I'd fucking kill myself straight up. Don't tell me it doesn't matter, it absolutely fucking does matter. There's a good amount of men who have decent sized dicks and cumshots in the world, and from the bottom of my heart I hate all of them.

Until I find the results I want, this feeling is never going to leave me.

bathmate + holy grail of orgasms/cum

>bathmate
Google is telling me it's some sort of penis pump? I've never believed in those things, seems like whack science. Any information from personal experience or whatever you can tell me? Much appreciated.

You will get wet-dreams soon. I hadn't masturbated since Jan 1st but I had a wet-dream the night before last. That hasn't happened in 7 or 8 years. Currently take 30-50mg of Zinc per day and 1000mg L-Arginine per day.

sorry user I have just see it mentioned in several threads, maybe you can open a new one asking for people who actually have used it

can't stand eating celery for some reason.
would taking celery pills work?

I've been taking 40mg, but I guess it's safe to move up to 50mg? Haven't had any wet dreams, but of course I think erotic thoughts myself, not a dream though. Look forward to having one soon if it's going to happen.

Idk, I might try it. I'm less worried about my dick size and more concerned with my cumload. I feel that if I can at least last 15-30 minutes of stimulation, and have a decent sized load, I'll be at a good place mentally about myself.

I should also mention that I haven't slept with a woman before, nor do I intend to until marriage. However, I want to improve myself and get as close to a 10/10 as possible so I can get a 10/10 babe as a wife.

It's imperative that I get my dick working right for this to happen.

been on the holy grail cum stack and never really noticed any benifits. no harder erections, no bigger loads, no improved libido, no wet dreams

>haven't slept with a woman before, nor do I intend to until marriage.

nigga wtf are you doing. motherfucking abort.

I wouldnt use pygeum because it lowers DHT.

No sir, it's an iron creed that I plan on sticking to. I'll bust my ass off to improve as a man and seek out a woman as close to a goddess as possible to marry, but I'll not engage in any sexual activities prior to that.

I'm not the kind to be a faggot about it and pretend I'm better than others, it's just something that I strongly believe in. Frankly, I'd rather die than break this oath to myself.

I'm a noob to these terms, what exactly is "DHT"? Google says some sort of sex steroid or something?

>>>/reddit/

Oh my FUCKING GOD, I just read the archives about Pygeum and literally the ONLY positive is it makes you pre-cum alot, but I'm fucking circumcised so Pre-cum is kinda pointless and doesn't happen to me anyway. Thank God I ran out of the shit for quite a few weeks now and have been taking everything else.

Shit, maybe it's a good thing I ran out and stopped taking it for a I'd say a solid month? Even though I listed it I haven't used it since, just remember I used it before. I ordered some from Amazon that's on the way, but I think I should leave that shit alone and focus on everything else.

Pre-cum isn't worth the risk for me. Plus it mentioned something about manboobs and I already have that problem a bit to begin with. Yeah, fuck that shit.

might wanna dial back your power level if you hope to land a 10/10

Please elaborate what you mean user.

I can tell your a raging turbo autist just from your posts. I can't even imagine how much spaghetti you spill in person.

I'm not much of a speaker, but when I do speak with people I'm always chill and relaxed, making it a point to hide my powerlevels. I'm posting on Veeky Forums, of course I'm going to come across as an autistic faggot.

Is too much celery a thing? Can I just munch on stalks all day? I'm trying to cut after hitting a plateau and it is 100% because of my diet. I'm a boredom eater and my job is basically sitting on my ass looking at reddit all day. Can I just sit and eat say 500g of celery and be fine?

>sitting on my ass looking at reddit all day.
fuck off

I didn't mean it as bait or anything. I would be on Veeky Forums, but the risk for nsfw is too damn high. You can control content on reddit and if you avoid the hugely popular subs, its pretty good. I really don't understand this huge irrational hatred towards reddit. Sure you can nitpick from certain communities on there, but its no different to picking trash boards here.

What is this thread? Out of all the things to possibly be insecure about, there are guys out there worried about their cum load.

I'm a woman and I've slept with a good few men during my lifetime. However I honestly can't say anything about their cum load differences. Only one steps out, since his cum smelled and tasted awful. All the others, I never payed much attention. My vag doesn't have eyes nor has my mouth.

I get all the fuss around your actual dick size, but this is just ridiculous.

First, you're not a woman. Second, cum load is absolutely fucking everything. If you have a less than average sized dick then at the very least having a reasonable cumload would bring solace. All of you saying none of this matter can respectfully fuck RIGHT off.

>I've slept with a good few men during my lifetime.

fuck off roastie

In for answers

Also a femanon and seriously why is Veeky Forums so overly worried about how much they're cumming? Unless you're actively trying to have a child or plan to in the future, your spermcount isn't something you need to worry about, and is something only a doctor can determine. No one is going to look at you and be disappointed you didn't cum buckets.

Just drink pineapple juice and you'll taste fine, that's all you need.

Are you retarded? Girls don't care about your cumload. Gay guys do.

Seriously proof that Veeky Forums is just faggots and autists at this point jesus christ.

>I've dated all the women in the world
Well aren't you the alpha male Chad.

> thinking volume and spern count are related

American education system is trash

Sorry that I don't care about cum loads like most women lmfao.

Keep trying to convince yourselves you aren't craving cock.

>refers to himself as a woman
>calls us the faggots
It's ok if you have a fetish for small cumshots, no need to get mad at us for trying to improve our loads.

I'm literally a female

>buys into the no females on the internet meme from 2006
>full on retard

>I'm literally a female
That's what literally every prettyboy twink says, don't force your delusion on me faggot.

I bet you voted for Hillary. Kek

>thinking that increasing the volume of the fluid in which the sperm are suspended won't improve their mobility in comparison to having otherwise tiny globs of cum
What a piece of shit

> Thicker loads = / = higher chance of getting some pregnant

Tits or gtfo

Actually, sperm count is measured per millilitre so total "potency" is calculated as sperm count * volume.

>wanting to see manboobs
Though if he was hardcore and got tit implants alongside those pills I'd at least give him some credit for effort.

This thread wtf, lmfao.

>I buy those hannaford bags of like a pound and a half or so and break them open for 3-5 days worth.
>Good for peanut butter

Does celery seed actually help your sex health?

No.

Having normal genetics does though

True story, I juice a couple of stalks every day and my jizzle is like pic related.