How the fuck do you "club"?
I have literal autism and my brother is dragging me out this weekend, my first time going. I've been to bars and shows before, but never a club. I figure I might as well put my gains to the test and try to hook up with some chicks, but how do I go about it?
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clubs r a shithole there are only validation seeking sluts there and they r all pretty easy but careful about letting them sleep at ur house they wake up b4 u and steal ur shit happened to my friend once
are you handsome and charismatic? just go up to girls and ask them to dance
otherwise you're pretty much fucked unless you're good at talking to grils but I doubt that due to your autism
Do you drink?
Do then, it will ease the passing of time.
It's dark, nobody fucking cares about anyone else.
Don't try hard to pull sluts. They should come easy, otherwise it's not worth it.
Buy some E and enjoy
Two words;
I'm visiting my family in another state and living with my g-grandma, i think its safe to say i wont be bringing anyone home. I was thinking along the lines of the good old classic 1-2 hookup at the club and then split our seperate ways?
I do not drink but I do consider myself charismatic and handsome enough to not be an ugly shit. I know my place, I'm not going for 10/10's here. I just want to know the social contract and basic routine.
If you do party drugs or the music is something you're really into, then it'll all make sense and you'll have a nice time.
Otherwise, it's just girls who get a kick out of flirting with guys but don't really want to hook up, girls who are way too drunk but want to hook up (don't do it) and betas working some sort of autistic strategy thinking it will get them laid.
honestly I couldn't stand a club sober
but if you're going after girls, don't be too aggressive and try too hard, make eye contact before dancing with them
just get drunk and stop worrying about things
>sober
>at a club
That is not going to be fun
Get drunk. Clubs are retarded unless your drunk.
If you don't like getting drunk or going to clubs, don't fucking get drunk or go to clubs. I knew I hated clubs since i was 17, and every year or so, some female friends would try to be like "YOU'LL HAVE FUN WITH US I PROMISE LOL" and then i didn't have fun.
Now when they tell me to go clubbing, I tell them only if they play Dungeons and Dragons with me, and they don't even entertain the idea, so I do the same about clubbing.
>I have autism
Then the club isn't for you
It's 100% looks based, so if you can't pull women on look alone, don't bother going.
Unless you actually enjoy clubbing, but nobody enjoys clubbing.
>going clubbing as a sub9/10 male
[muffled eurobeat plays in the distance]
judging by this post you aren't gonna pull any chicks. most likely you'll be awkwardly standing around with your brother who will be equally sexless
you motherfucker
> Now when they tell me to go clubbing, I tell them only if they play Dungeons and Dragons with me, and they don't even entertain the idea, so I do the same about clubbing.
Most alpha yet beta yet alpha thing I've read all day.
...
Here is how you pull at the club.
>wear a well fitted button shirt (roll the sleeves bitches love that), nice jeans, and clean white converse. Also Versace Eros cologne
>drink a bit before you get there, then order a beer or rum and coke once youre inside. its good to have a drink in hand to help you dance and so women know youre drinking
>stay towards the front of the dance floor, make or join a dance circle with your brother. Its good he is coming so people dont think youre a loner
>if a girl likes you she will literally just walk up and start dancing on your dick. Just let the alcohol do the trick and move to the good old 1234. also never do that stupid shit you see in movies where you try to introduce yourself by buying them a drink.
>after some dancing and/or making out buy her and one of her friends. This is important because her friends will cock block the fuck out of you so you need to make a good impression on at least one of them. Even better if you hook up your brother with her
>a little before 2 ask her if she wants to go back to your place. Say you live close and there is an extra room for her friend (even if those things arent true)
This is the most systematic way to do it. A lot of it is just being at the right place at the right time. Go into it thinking the odds are against you and remember most people dont hook up with strangers they meet there
*buy one and one of her friends a shot. dont literally try to buy them
and then you rape both of them.
>Say you live close and there is an extra room for her friend (even if those things arent true)
>(even if those things arent true)
So uh...what's the next step?
well if she says yes you take an uber to your place and rail her
Have terrible sex and get arrested for rape in the morning.
it's not rape. she can't say no because of the implication
>club
>have literal autism
>how do I go about it?
Just like Renton
MDMA, just make sure not go overdo it, much vetter than alcohol
I would more like to fuck them in their home for some reasons. How would I do that?
Meant for
I never really enjoyed clubbin' or partyin', but basically have a couple drinks and just dance. If a girl likes you she will join you. Once you are done lead her off tthe dance floor and get a drink together, then try to go somewhere you can talk.
all of this besides the first 2 points is 100% bang on
first 2 are more whatever clothes and fragrance suit you best (that said get creed aventus if you can afford it) and whatever drinks get you in the zone best
holding a drink also depends on the venue, a lot of places pretty much everyone's drunk anyway so there's no need to hold anything since it's assumed
I guess you can drop the hint and ask if she lives close by but dont try to invite yourself just see if she offers
Im the guy who wrote that. I own creed adventus and I think versace eros is much better for clubbing. Adventus only works well if youre getting sun imo, not something for indoors
and you have to remember this guy has autism. I gave him a look literally anyone can pull off
I'll agree to disagree on creed aventus but solid advice for the most part
It's awful and the music they play these days is god awful, literally the worst music i have ever heard. A least in the past it was club music, then drum and bass and then i could just about bear dubstep, but house is designed for people with a double digit iq.
That said, you cope by getting ass fucking wasted and grinding on girls then pulling them. It's fun when you get to that stage.
* sorry also forgot:
> make sure you're dancing near the girls toilets because you'll want to hit on the ones leaving otherwise any girl on the dancefloor can use the excuse that they need the toilet and this way you can know
hehe
>wear brand clothes to the club
>be Veeky Forums with visible abs and big biceps
>good face but bald
>drink
>drink a lot
>become a pathetic mix of aggressive alpha attitude and incredible desperation
>girls can smell this a mile away
>end up getting thrown out of the club every time
I definitely think adventus smells better when it is at its best but it only radiates well when there is a lot of heat which is why I only wear it in the sunshine. Perhaps if OP was at a rave or a very crowded club adventus would work well. Eros just has really strong performance and wont die down either when he is waiting in line. Girls also love the smell. You should really give it a try bro, it isnt too expensive.
>creed aventus
shit opinion, girls hate it
get l'homme de la nuit
autism.
not good, girls wont even be able to smell it. really only good for when youre not going out anywhere.
there are much worse things to be autistic about
Get shitfaced and just do whatever you want and have a good time
If your sober you wont be having a good time
this was actually not a bad guide.
the only thing is I wouldnt buy a drink for her friend.
Just after awhile I would ask her if she wants to go get a drink to get away from her friends and prevent a cockblock.
what would be the exit plan though? most women wouldnt leave the place without telling their friends. Then when she says she wants to hook up theyre gonna give the whole "you dont know this guy youve been drinking too much he isnt chad" etc etc
Most people aren't clubbing to try and hook up, they're out with friends trying to have a good time
I know this is bait, but it's easy as fuck to get laid by those girls who want to go clubbing with YOU.
Storytime.
>got to know group of people from a different department at work
>hung out with them, 1 other dude and 3 girls
>played drinking games at a girls house
>all of us got wasted as fuck
>we decide that we want to go clubbing
>we go clubbing and I dance with the 2 girls (1 girl went home)
>other dude is being beta and just drinking at the bar (later he leaves and texts girl nr. one that he went to another club with a girl, bull-fucking-shit)
>girl number one starts getting jealous that I'm dancing more with girl nr. 2 and goes outside, girl two follows
>I continue dancing with other people
>no fucks given
>some weird dude with an accent gives me his number
>whatever
>don't remember much from here on
>end up outside somehow
>girl one is talking to a group of girls about me that I'm an asshole
>whatever
>sit next to girl nr. 2 and talk
>I remember saying "women are just vaginas and men are just cocks, so what."
>she starts feeling up my leg
>girl one notices and gets upset
>both girls confront me and want me to decide who I want
>decide for girl nr. one because I know girl nr. two has a boyfriend
>go home with girl nr. one
>fuck her
>next day both girls have two different stories on what happened
>kek
>the end
t. virgin
>Needing a plan with with a script to pull sluts at a club
Jesus Christ
Get drunk, that's literally it.
If you plan to stay sober then don't bother going, it's fucking garbage if all your senses are on point and you're going through your dimensional self reflecting autism game in your mind.
Go with friends otherwise you'll probably have a boring time there
What I do is i go up to the dance floor and pretend im treading on ants. It creates the illusion of dancing and once in a while I will pretend the ants are on me and in my hair this creates variety in the moves.
t. man who doesn't get laid
I'm not going to write my own guide, but I get laid with a new girl every second weekend, and >90% of what this guy wrote is bullshit and will only work if you go for 6/10 sloots and you're a 9/10 guy.
>I'm not going to write my own guide
Fuck off then
I think the point is if you need a guide to get some random club sluts, you're an autistic weirdo who is guaranteed to not get even a club slut