GET IN HERE /30+/

That's because you probably jerk off to obscene porn all the time. Stop whacking it to porn and you'll notice a difference.

get her in shape?

Echo that. Same age, same issue.

>aka Low Test thread

Lol I get in here and two of the first three posters have dick problems
>lmaoing at ur life right now

>in gym for 2 months
You sure talked a lot of shit for a noob

that's ok if you're lucky you'll live till 30, who knows you might even get a qt gf by then

maybe one day you will lift things and put them down and find joy in it.

I agree. This is an elders revival thread. But I guess these old fucks have soft dicks. HARD DICKS FOR HERALDO

>implying anyone on this board is straight
>implying anyone on this board past 30 is straight and not socially inept

oh you

I'm stalling at 25kg OHP and 35kg bench. Ex-skellie into skinny fat when 25ish, currently 33. How do I get better while maintaining my cut? I just wanna go back to being a skellie again if I can't hit ottermode.

Also I still wanna fuck anything that moves but my wife is tired due to the 3 kids sapping most of her energy and I can't get sluts with this huge gut.

>maybe one day I will lift
Please, dyel. You said you been lifting for 2 months? Don't get ahead of yourself there little fella

got me.

YOU GOTTA EAT BIG TO GET BIG CMON

>obscene porn
Some of it's regular, some of it's bizarre.
50/50.
Either way I look for novelty.

Condesending tone does not really work when other person has self respect. You'll find someone else to annoy successfully soon, I'm sure

Just to recap:
>said he has been lifting for 2 months
>tells me one day I might enjoy lifting
You got me fucked up, player

>26

Can I post in the dusty balls general, anyone drinking a single beer after work and doing some stuff with the kids also?

30 is the new 40
Offing myself in 3 years

32 here.

Did 200 burpees last night in 19:57.

On day five of a seven day NOFAP waiting for fuck buddy to get back into town.

Did 5 sets of 12 pullups with 15# hanging from my waist last night.

Feels good man.

>44
>check off most the low test symptom list
>lifting 6 months
>no gains except spare tire
>little bit of sporadic ED
>get test checked
>think my prayers are answered
>comes back 615

currently considering soduko

>615

Jesus

Ayyy barely made it into the club, turned 30 a few months ago. Can't let these whipper snappers hoard all the gains

32 5'9 manlet
Pros
>265 bench
>355 squat
>455 diddly
>get hit on by young 20 somethings all the time
>Need to bust 2x a day
>Have $$$
>More breast implants around me
>Have developed game, instead of relying on my looks

Cons
>some hairloss
>over partying
>responsibilities
>bros are having kids

>34
>wife, two ninos, doggo
>progress like a mother on madcow but always get injured because I simply can't recover from so many weeks of aggressive gains
>too greedy for gains to reset when needed
>older but apparently not wiser
>just want to be a slab of beef and make other 30+ husbands who gave up on their bodies a decade ago look pathetic
>want r9k to leave my fitness board holy shit the feelposting continues unabated leave the house you little shits

And just for fun my nightly proton shake:
1 cup whole milk
1 scoop vanilla prot powder
3 ice cubes
.5 frozen banana
1 spoon cocoa
.5 spoon pb
.1 cup wife's breast milk from freezer (why waste it, right? little one on formula now and this is pure gains juice right from the source)

Fuck yeah. Inspiring breh

>not sure how I /feel/ about this

dudes you must empty your balls at least once a day how dose not matter but please do it for your sperm to stay fresh.
i really dont want you all to die of ball cancer caused by dead sperm build up.
look it up its a real thing.

>125 OHP
>175 bench
>295 squat
>375 dead

How the fuck do I escape the hamlet of impoverished benching?

This is me after lifting for three years. i started out as a 23 year old fat shit. I am hihgly jealous

way to hide that micropenis.

you can lie to us, but not yourself.

I'm that gorilla dick nigga, I make dyke pussy wet

You really think so?

and how many bitches you've fucked?

Am feeling that way as well, it just feels boring. bitches get boring, i nut and i just want to move on to the next one.
and for the rest of you

>age you've lost virginity

>number of skanks you've fucked

It's part of being a man, I'm 32 have had over banged over 60 women, have had threesomes and all types. Have a super hot GF with big fake titties and a great big ass, she runs and lifts. While I still want and love to fuck her, I can't stop thinking about fucking everything that moves.

that's good, hope i'll be just like you until then

>exaggerated black bar

>lost vCard at 13
>banged about 40 grills by 25 yo probably
I took a long layoff from girls. Probably averaging sex once per year for the past 8 years or so

I'm 29 can I post here?

yes,

now answer this >age you've lost virginity

>number of skanks you've fucked

Are you a grill?

38
My dick worked up until my wife broke it 2 months ago. She gets crazy when she's squirting and landed too hard on my dick. There was a loud crunch and now my dick doesn't get rock hard, just semi hard and needs constant attention or it goes down.

But I hit a 585 x 9 squat today !!!#

>not sure if tarp

You're not gonna make it jr

Bro my gf bent my dick in half once as well. There was a distinctive "pop" and tons of pain. I've had a "natural curvature" since then. But, girls actually seem to love a curved (upward) Wang.

Heel make it
We're all gonna make it brah

1. Um someday, I hope
2. 0

Either that or peyronies disease. Maybe both

Have you learned how to setup? Driving from feet, active back and glutes, nice tight lockdown on upper back, row bar into you, grip the shit out of it? You can't do anything until your setup is nice and solid. Until then shittly little stabilizer muscles are limiting your ability to progress on the lift.

Yeah, that user's right. It's not a lowered T thing. That's a you desensitizing your brain and thus your dick thing.

So bad news is your dick no longer worky. Good news is your gains will continue to be okay.

>How the fuck do I escape the hamlet of impoverished benching?
More volume. For some reason a lot of idiots in the fitness industry think that huge leg volumes are 100% necessary yet practically no arm volume is necessary. If you don't feel like flat benching more, try adding just as much incline volume as you do bench volume.

>And I may as well tell you all that my dick still works just fine.. I want to fuck all the time.. just not my wife
Ouch, bro.

>pure
>27
I know senpai.

>wife
wew just get a divorce?

probably too beta to leave or start over lmao

Brah, I literally look like you in the first pic right now. 31 y/o here. Been making some gains over the past few months. Interested to know your routine/diet/etc.

Also, how big is your dick?
>No homo

>probably too beta to leave or start over lmao
This is literally the reason all marriages stay.
Well I guess get used to ending up like those old couples who have an awkward tension between them every time they go out shopping or doing anything in public and makes every around them feel uncomfortable.
W e w

Look senpai, i just realized my op ends in my birth year! 1983 bitches
>34 yo soon
>END ME

This grill is remotely attractive
>would bang

>this grill
nigga thats ellen page.
also
>sara JUST financial cuck my shit up and give me a greencard piana
Too much muscle on this chick. I like petite grills like ellen desu.

Thanks, lads

I've always run some variant of an ABCABCX hypertrophy split, current iteration attached. IIFYM diet.

family sized.

>Well I guess get used to ending up like those old couples who have an awkward tension between them every time they go out shopping or doing anything in public and makes every around them feel uncomfortable.

Lawl, yeah dude, fuck that shit.
seen the tension when my friend argue with his cunt wife and shit. and the drama involving divorces as well too, it makes me super glad i am not them.

why bother being miserable with some insufferable skank until you die?

I don't like musclefus either. But I really like sara pianas bimbo body. She really made it (into the country)

as long as you have the money, or a sugar daddy

Pun observed
>fun size

I'm 33
I'm in shape
I'm making money
I've fucked about 100 chicks in my life and it's gotten pretty boring. Or at least I just don't give a shit anymore.

I just want a partner to have fun with and go on adventures with and who will take care of me when I'm sick.

But then I read
And now I dunno

>want r9k to leave my fitness board holy shit the feelposting continues unabated leave the house you little shits
I feel this feel too

I'LL BE POSTING THIS THREAD OVER ON /R9K/ PROBABLY THIS WEEKEND AS WELL
OP ALWAYS DELIVERS

REEEEEEEEEEEE ROLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

>I just want a partner to have fun with and go on adventures with and who will take care of me when I'm sick.

You want a dog. Which obviously won't take care of you when you're sick. But still.

How many std's have you contracted?

interesting. Going to have to give this a shot though some of these Im unfamiliar with--mainly sideways stuff.

>be me
>Anxiety
>test checked
>181
>cant be true
>3 months later recheck is 178
>military so docs will only give Fortesta gel
>Considering paying for test or just commit sudoku
>Also 20% BF so cry evry tim.

Dead sperm cells equal retArded babies

After about 5 bitches in 5 months I decided to quit before I got herpes or hep I had a few close calls

use protection, are you retarded or something?

not him, but tfw shitty chest origins/muscle bellies have always made it hard for me to bench. it's the only lift that i actively concentrate on and it's such an up hill battle always.

That's how my parents aunts and uncles all are. I noticed my married brubz and there ladies get like that too.

It's kind of cool though cuz now when people start bitching about toilet seats or who the fuck are you texting it has virtually no effect on my emotions. A girl yelling who the fuck is she registers no different than hello in my brain

30 yrs old, single. 2 daughters, doing the single dad thing. dating is a fucking disaster. young girls are still fucking cruel, the older ones get too clingy or have too many kids. I realize its hypocritical of me to not want to date a woman with kids when I have 2, but i dont really care. starting my first cycle of test in april, prob gonna cruise after that

They always fly off n shit. You ever fucked a bitch in the mouth or ass with a condom. I'd go through like a pack of condoms in a few hours. It's not like one condom lasts for one fuck

Never date a woman with kids, period. And t.bh you're probably better off staying single until your daughters go off to college.

>Its not like one condom lasts for one fuck
Wat? It's supposed to. How many condoms do you use to have sex one time? Are you double baggin or something?
>bag boy

>Never date a woman with kids, period.

fuckin' amen

Well if I go from butt to mouth I do a condom change figure that's happnin at least twice then you could fuck two or three times a night and they get all ripped up sometime

but idw to be single ;-;

i know youre right im just lonely. part of why im taking test, for the confidence boost

>using a condom for oral
I've never felt that feel. Seems like it would be lame

No. A woman who will fulfill those needs and help me grow as a person and vice versa

Chlamydia twice and probably have HPV but no symptoms

lmao Jesus dude

Ive smashed about 40 girls in my life.
About 4 of those were worthwhile, good sex.
The rest were mediocre to terrible.
One night stands never seem to be good. Probably due to alcohol, bit of awkwardness and not really being able to fully go HAM on eachothers body like you can with a gf.

On the other hand, when I have a gf and good sex, it eventually plateaus and I think about wanting freedom and the ability to smash randoms.

The grass is always greener, im never satisfied no matter what. The problem now is that im older (wiser and richer) but I dont really have the energy to pursue girls like I used to.

I might just buy a fleshlight and a VR headset.

>I'm litterally considering buying a vr headset just for pron

>I would probably buy a real doll if they weren't like 10k

GET IN HERE ELDERS

BUMP THAT SHIT UP OLDFAGS CMON

$1000, fucks better than a real thing lolololol

$1000? What, used?
>gross