Motivation?

What really keeps you going every day, and what makes that extra rep worth it?

>lost entire friend group in middle school
>bullied at the time, dead rats in my locker a couple times along with ass kickings behind the gym
>family history of chronic depression rears its head
>find solace in vidyagaems
>get fatter
>and lazier
>was kinda skinny before but now I'm straight chubby
>self esteem even worse
>always have friends that are only held at a slight distance e.g. I always have to initiate interactions first
>ffwd to first year of college, never had a meaningful relationship that lasted past graduation (turns out I lost my new friends without realizing it) and am now alone as fuck
>generally on the NEET path despite drugs therapy etc.
>decide enough is enough and rebuild my life from the ground up my freshman year at college
>eat healthy on deficit, work out 6 days a week
>wake up and go to bed early
>no games, ever
>energy, esteem, and grades improve
>on track to double majoring by graduation

My best days are the ones I wake up angry oddly enough. Anger at myself for being an irresponsible shit and anger at people who drove me to wanting to end it on so many occasions. Every healthy choice I make, every time a rep gets easier, every pound of flabby bullshit I lose is a big fuck you to them and that makes any pain worth it. It's hard to be depressed if you don't have any good reason to be anymore.

My younger self and future kids.

When i was 7, i always wanted to be a rich, jacked, good looking guy.

Now, the goal is to stand so tall, i can always be a beacon for my kids, at any time in their life.

I just enjoy it, that's what motivates me

>What really keeps you going every day

Discipline

Training gets me out of bed in the morning

>Wants to have kids so they can worship him

Nice goals there, narcissist.

To prove I can actually accomplish something worthwhile in my life and hopefully snowball from there.

Because lifting is my favorite hobby

I'm currently working a job I hate, after 6 months of working 2 jobs and taking classes and freelance work. I used to be big for normies, my friends called me "deisel" because I was "deisel as fuck". Now I'm balding and fat/skinny fat because I had 6-8 months of no lifting and shit diet, no sleep, and stress.
So when I wake up and see my body in the mirror, I'm disgusted. I see my thin hair in the bathroom light, and it fills me with despair.
So I log my meals, count my calories. I take my sups and shakes.
I run my laps.
I lift hard as fuck, because I know I cant coast on my formerly good hair and handsome face. Now I have to be jacked and bald. I think about all the times I got mired, got respect, and I work harder. I think about how my ex lives in the city my new job is gonna take me to, and how she would feel seeing me now. So I throw in some hypertrophy.
It's a good mix of shame and self loathing, combined with the immense satisfaction of getting back into my favorite hobby.

Ah, another patrician I see.

this

the hardest working people are the ones who can't live without it

it's literally how i get my kicks in life. Like John north said, some people go skydiving, some people drive fast cars, Me? I lift some weights.

Anger and autism are tools used to fuel the fires of the world user. Keep on truckin'.

I like picking things up and putting them back down.

I guess the more esoteric origin of that is when I was younger I always wanted to be big and strong. I'm a manlet but I'm bretty strong so I don't really mind.

...

...

Ever since I did shrooms I've felt disgusting being unhealthy so I pretty much have to exercise and eat right or else I just feel gross.

This is cancer.

Once you do something long enough it becomes a way of being. That and the always present fear of becoming fat.

It's technically my hobby, but its also probably the reason I'm still alive.

It's the feeling that no matter how worthless I feel, that after lifting I can always look back and say today I improved myself. It means the world to me.

I'm an angry, bitter person who hates it when anyone else even thinks they're better than him. I can't stand seeing people think they have the upper hand over me, I can't stand it when they brag, and I ESPECIALLY hate it when they actually are better. I lift so that I can be the best, so that other people will see I'm the best, and because I hate the old me enough to want to bury him in muscle. Every set I can't finish is a failure, a disgrace, a permanent black mark on my record. I hate letting the weights win and I would hate giving them the last laugh by never going back.
Those are a few things that motivate me.

>always got made fun of by my family for being fat
>ex said I was a chubby entitled spoiled brat
>pretty enough where Chads wanted to fuck me but not hot enough to date
>called cute
>lost lots of hot guys I had a lot in common with and probably could have dated if I lost weight
>decide to lose weight and add back all the guys I had flings with
>counting calories, lifter, cardio bunny, gyming 5x times a week
>9lbs away from my goal weight
>obsessed with being healthy
>can't wait to post in a cbt thread of my before / after

>Have no insecurities about my personaility, I'm funny, charming, and nice. Everybody I meet thinks I'm great.
>Do have insecurities about my body. More of a self aware issue than a self esteem issue.
>Get Veeky Forums. No insecurities.

Anyone else just feels like shit if they don't workout so if nothing else that keeps em motivated?

Lifting is the only reason I go out. I don't know where to meet new people and my friends are NEETs.

>Anger at myself for being an irresponsible shit and anger at people who drove me to wanting to end it on so many occasions.

you are growing up