Fitness equipment you wish existed

An affordable barbell monitor that tracks rate of force development

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scienceforsport.com/rate-of-force-development-rfd-2/
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

A gym door that automatically detects dyel faggots like OP and kick them out immediately.

That's called your brain you fucktard. Do some math

A machine that works out for me while I watch anime and then injects the gains into myself.

A barbell with stands built in that hold the bar just high enough that a 45 won't touch the ground.

a noose that hangs from the ceiling so i can work my neck out

That's called a deadlifting bar Jack, dumbass

Advanced cameras that can check your squat .a screen in front of me that shows the side view. Instant replay split screen.

>built-in

You're not supposed to do the lifts on the jack

What's the point?

When did I say you were supposed to?

not that guy but fuck youre stupid.

>he says built in
>you say something that isnt built in and needs to be remove and somehow hes the dumbass

>easy plateloading from the floor
>consistent bar height since plates have variances
>presumably made with material that won't damage floor

Name of video?

When you put it like that it sounds useful

every nba team facility, they literally have squat racks with 5 cameras inside and you can watch yourself after doing set

I just want a dip machine in the gym i go to desu. That shit would make things so much easier.

Machine that automatically adds plates to a bar. Biggest benefit- no hunting for plates some jackass loaded onto the leg press

You could just put a small plate on the floor and roll one side of the loaded bar onto it. It makes pulling off multiple 45's easier.

checked btw

A robot that spots you and shouts motivational slogans at you. Firmware can be reconfigured and you can download custom made personalities into it like Rich Piana, Shia Labeouf, and that Japanese guy who's fishing for clams in cold water.

that's just the amount of weight you move, this is some masterful shitposting

Dedicated washing basins for shared squat plugs next to every power cage/squat rack.

Spraying and wipe doesn't cut I'm afraid.

Steroids that wouldn't make you go bald.

405lb is the rate?

>there are people on Veeky Forums who literally don't understand the phrase "rate of force development"
scienceforsport.com/rate-of-force-development-rfd-2/

rogue (and i'm sure other manufacturers) make unloading jacks. pic related

Those would work good for hip thrusters
Just slide under the bar n start humpin

Antigravity plates. It's retarded but every time I work out with someone who lifts different weights I always have the thought "We just need -10 or -20" or whatever on each side.

Jeez, if you could manfucature that you could sell it to every sports team as "breakthrough in sports science".
You'd need 2 gyroscopes and 2 accelerometers? A piezo pad for the weight so no manual input if you want to be fully automatic

Glasses that highlight people in the Gym that didn't wash their hands after using the bathroom.

roids?

There are bar tracking apps that can do this. Look up Barsense (android) or iron path (iPhone)

Fucking why?

A penis shaped object inside the squat rack that touches my butte as soon as I squat below parallel.

>after
What the fuck dude, you're supposed to wash your hands before using the bathroom, otherwise you get gym shit on your dick.

do girls in the us workout in their bras?