Mirin/autism thread

I'm quite honestly surprised that didn't make her want to fuck you more.

Feelin fit buddy?

>wuld
My sides are in Tamriel.
You still should've gotten her number, she sounds chill as fuck.

Heard any news from the other provinces?

That's actually pretty alpha.
Is there a quantifiable point where autism turn you into Chad?

Im a weird guy what can i say.

...

TOP KEK

good thread

>at party with friends i haven't seen for a year
>"woahh user you been hitting the weights?"
>"look at his arms jesus"
>ignore because don't know how to respond and because i know they were just being kind as my arms are toothpicks and nothing impressive

also i never get bigger, everyone else just looks smaller

When you're a toothpick and start lifting, even if you're still DYEL, you look bigger in comparison to how they remember you looking.

So even if you're still DYEL, the effort you've put in is shown on your body. Knowing you have the fortitude to stick to a regimen is far more attractive than the actual result, which is why they slobbed your knob.

I'm just a lucky guy

yeah it's

>guys say: "woah youre getting big"
>thanks, been lifting quite dedicatedly (proceed to explain my regimen)
>girls say: "you lifting?"
>nah

This sounds like a dream come true.

>Every time I go to bed I'm always hugging my pillow and pretending its a girl.

>Sister in law has just gotten back from overseas trip.
>I've lost 15kg in the time she's been gone.
>"Holy shit, user".

My wife also showed me a picture from two years ago, when I was probably 110kg, just to say the difference between that and now is insane.
Ten more kilos and I'll be at my first goal.

What movie is this?

she was 100% a prostitute anyway.

Read OP's post aloud (autism) and had a hearty kek

SSSSTRIKE THREE

Reposting because the last autism thread ended too early

>Freshman year
>all sorts of girls from different middle schools coming to one high school
>SurelyIhaveachancenow.jpg
>Cute girl thinks I'm hilarious
>we'll call her erica
>always getting cozy with me
>I have a disorder that when things go good
>I go autistic
>For some reason start insulting her
>Call her chewbacca because she has peach fuzz on her lip
>Plug out her computer while she's doing an essay in english class
>One day shes trying to call her mom for a ride home
>Blurt out into the phone "Erica likes penis! : v )
>However
>No matter how far my powerlevel would ascend
>She would just awkwardly laugh it off
>Eventually she moves on to another guy
>He starts hanging out with us
>One day after school he's with me and Erica
>Decide to go max power even tho its a monday
>I say "Erica you have something in your hair lol"
>"Oh Where"?
>Lean over and spit in her hair because I think its gonna be a funny joke
>Yell out "RIGHT HERRRR!!"
>She has a look that I lack the vocabulary to describe
>It a mix of horror, sadness, shock and despair.
>If someone saw they would think she was raped.
>The dude who was with us then proceeds to beat my ass like there's no tomorrow.
>was quite surprised but figured out quickly his reasoning
>Erica watches us.
>It reminded me of my chinese cartoons.
>When the main character swoops in the nick of time to save the girl.
>I was a pretty fast thinker and already knew the outcome of the situation
>Realize I have no chance of winning
>Realize that I have to escape
>Realize that I must go home and learn how to endure shame
>Realize that I might have something wrong with me
>I was able to escape the beating and had to have my mom pick me up at a walmart 3 miles away from the school.

The worst part is this isn't even the most cringest moment of my HS career.

Or even my life

Probably just saved yourself from STD

>My sides are in Tamriel.
kek

I always try to dress nicely. But I've basically gone down a size in shirt and waste over the past month.

All complements before were "wow you look all dressed up"
Have now changed to "wow you look nice" or "looking good today user!"
But only on days when I wear one of the few outfits that even fits right now that my entire wardrobe is a size too big

oh my fucking god

...

Post another cringestory so cringesama

...

I think you are ill

I'm not mentally ill or anything I just make bad choices at good times.

>Junior year
>In film class
>Tasked with making a film
>Film can be whatever due to it being the end of the 1st semester and the teacher didn't care outside of length requirements etc.
>Ever since I was in kindergarten I was always scheming to get a GF.
>I would follow them to their classes to see their interests, copy their parents license plates numbers, etc.
>I even got inspired by manga character info charts (The ones that list stats and their dislikes etc) >I would start doing this with girls I like
>Anywhoosies
>I have yet another brilliant scheme
>Im going to make the best film in class
>It will be so funny that girls will cream themselves
>Laughing maniacally in my head like I'm some cartoon character
>Film is due in three weeks
>Literally do not work on it at all and just laugh with friends everyday in class
>It's the weekend
>Film is due monday
>Too busy watching YGOTAS.
>Bazinga.jpg
>Get a great idea
>Decide to just copy a YGOTAS (Yugioh The Abridged Series) sketch
>It'll be easy since I have yugioh cards and a old duel disk
>Decide to do my favorite episode
>The one where duke devlin is introduced
>Ask my mom if I can use the car to a video game tournament or some BS.
>take the car to this old abandoned theater
>This place is well known amongst the youth because everyone likes to take the stairs up to the top and skateboard/smoke/whatever
>Fortunaetly theres no one there today
>Film out my whole sketch
>Try to copy the sketch
>Mimic the voices of the YGOTAS cast.
>Sunday spent Editing

Continued

I just looked up what WULD was, I'm literally in tears right now, thank you user.

>Monday
>Big day is here
>I'm probably going to be invited to girl's houses over winter break
>Maybe even get to eat pussy for the first time
>Or get my first kiss
>Or maybe..... have...... you know... sex..........
>Im the third to last person out of like 29
>Video starts
>Everyone waits attentively
>Video isn't funny
>None of the jokes makes anyone laugh
>Sweatyforeheadman.jpg
>No one thinks my duel disk is funny
>At one point In the video I say "MY MOSTER CARD RISES BY TWICE IT'S POINTS BECAUSE JERRY ALWAYS RISES TO THE OCCASION"
>I actually shouted this in the vid
>My names jerry btw
>Teacher has a look of pity while he watches the vid
>Someone goes "Faggot!"
>Everyone laughs
>People are laughing at me
>Girls are too
>Whenever I get into these situations I imagine about anime situations
>I imagined that my cringe manifested into youpi from hxh (pic related)
>I was knuckle
>Eventually I get overpowered and crushed
>I was hoping that I would get saved by a power outage or school shooting or a nuke or something
>Like how killua saves knuckle from youpi
>It doesn't happen
>Eventually bell rings
>Mom picks me up
>asks what's wrong
>I lash out at her in rage
>I get my ps4 and 3ds taken away

I know I sound like an aspie but I swear I'm not. I just get these voices telling me to do these ideas for great rewards but the rewards suck all the time

cringe

Can you post a pic of yourself
If not height weight

Oh and are you the virgin walk dude?

seek mental help

>I get my ps4 and 3ds taken away
MODS

i don't even feel bad for you man because you're obviously mentally challenged and don't realize the full extent of your problems

seek help

Okay I admit I'm retarded. Normal people don't spit in others hair or relate everything to anime. But it's to come with terms I might be mentally impaired. Like, that's not something you can fix no matter how much you work out.

5"5
130

I don't have editing tools so I had to make a crop

This post made my day

This has to be fake

Is ygotas any good?

>want a cookie user?
>No I want your pussy
>Get sued for sexual harrassment and is now a sex offender

Yes, commiting to a disease that entails a major lifestyle change is easier than saying "No thank you".

You guy's need help

And everyone in this thread shining you on are equally responsible when your autism ends up killing someone

Sorry if I spoiled your "fun"

Whenever someone has the audacity to touch me I smack their hand off and say "the compliment was sufficient Lewis"

Bump

>be me
>art modeling for local Catholic Uni
>naked+$$=awesome
>finish session one day
>student manages to somehow linger ad ends up in elevator with me
>'oh wow so um you must practice to be a model and stuff'
>'i'm just going back to my dorm, it was so interesting today with you'
>'OK WELL ITS PRETTY EASY ACTUALLY YOU JUST HAVE TO HOLD STILL. HAVE A NICE DAY'
>leave elevator, campus, hot peice of tail, never look back

still kicking myself over that one

>art modeling
What do you look like, user?

I hope you apologized for your autism.

At the time I was 6'1 185 and about 12%

What does that matter? Nude art models can look like fat blobs or skinny rails. Artists must practice on all body types to hone their craft.

The humor is mostly immature. It was awesome when it first came out, but I dont think it aged well.

A friend of mine spat in the hair of a girl he liked for no apparent reason.
He was socially retarded.
Then he started hanging out with people all the time and he has had countless sexual partners.
He is still a retard though, but it doesnt impair him anymore.
If you have a good friend talk to him about stuff before you actually do it. Thats how said friend stopped being a freak.... in time.

>Every time I go to bed I'm always hugging a pillow and pretending I'm a [little] girl.

oh ym god

Holy fuck, user, if you see her again you need to get her number. You can do it. I believe in you.

iktf bro

Bring me the head of [spic name]

Not sure if autism but

>summer of 2007
>11 years old
>just randomly chopping yews north of Varrock Castle
>having friendly conversation with people chopping with me
>then this girl comes along, who is 14
>I tell her things about me such as age, location etc
>I lie and tell her i'm 14 as well
>she asks me for my phone number...on fucking Runescape
>Tell her I lost my phone and log out
>*3 hours later*
>she messages me and asks if I found my phone
>"yes"
>Reluctantly I give her my number, and eventually calls me
>her voice is so sweet, clingy as fuck though
>she talked about the most inane shit. All I cared about at the time was leveling my woodcutting level
>eventually, she sends me a pic of her self, and not going to lie, she was an honest 7.5/10
>I thought I hit the jackpot, but no
>She literally calls me every 10 minutes, shit gets annoying after a while
>I eventually stop responding to her calls and put her on my ignore list
>mfw I could have got a legit girlfriend over Runescape

Not sure if I did the right thing, or was a beta. It probably wouldn't have worked out anyway since she lived in a different state.

>be at house party
>sitting on couch
>short qt approaches
>"hey wanna dance?"
>"No"
How the fuck are you supposed to dance with a girl anyway. A few minutes later my friend's gf even scolded me for being so autistic

>browsing fit
>see constant references to jaws, jawlets, guys with good jaws.
>become insecure about my own jaw
>start doing jaw exercises some abercrombie looking burger showed on youtube video
>don't even want a gril right now
>still trying to look better

Why do I work for what I don't want.

No xp waste bro, you did the right thing

Have you seen any changes? Is your jaw more defined?

Fuck dancing. You did nothing wrong.

>At a club quite hammered dancing with friends
>Two 8/10 girls start getting really close, dancing right next to me
>One of them kind of grinds me while her friend watches me
>"What the fuck, why would her friend be so interested in what she's doing if they are not trying to laugh at me or something"
>Girl turns around and looks at me, I look at her as if she broke into my house on Christmas and pissed on my kids
>Turn around
>Friend is looking at me like a deer in headlights
>"What the fuck are you doing, she is hot"

Not sure if she was actually into me and I was just imagining things

Only started this week so it's early days. But my jaw sits forward for a few hours after doing the exercises (instead of being recessed)

Sleep is better than girls. Sharing a bed is hell.

I mean, a hallmark of actual autism is a diminished capacity to feel empathy and a hallmark of being a "chad" in y'all's eyes seems to be not giving a fuck about other human beings.

But I'm a fucking normie so what do I know.

Post tits

>in uni
>finish workout and headed to change rooms
>bump into a girl i met at ice skating lessons
>she invites me to her dance show
>tell her i probably don't have time
>end the conversation with a fist bump
she was flexible af too. oh well.

>girl compliments arms and feels them up
>"i dont even do any arm isolation exercises"
>confused look
>"i only do compound lifts so I dont really focus on my arms much."
>her: "well i was just saying you had nice arms"
>"I have other muscles that are much nicer trust me"
>mfw I was talking about my glutes and quads but she thought I meant dick
t-thanks rippetoe

post glutes

what this guy said

Rear glute spread or gtfo

...

dis is pasta nig

Holy fuck

>At a party till 3am trashed af
>Uber pool back home and have a second rider 9/10 qt
>Hit it off good and right before my house she says "Im drunk enough not to care" and touches my my arm"
>sperged out said cool and leave the uber not realizing what she implied till the uber left.
>missed an uber one night stand and all my friends are ashamed

>that's not something you can fix no matter how much you work out
Well by the looks of it, you're not working out at all.

>wife
Get out

>learning how to ballroom dance in English senior year
>no idea why, but that's California for you
>finally got fit and came into my own I guess
>time to choose dancing partners
>one of the stacies from the Stacy group grabs my hand and says "I'm picking user"
>now learning some kind of slow dance
>"wow user, your eyes are so beautiful"
>autism intensifies
>your eyes are like, uh grey
I spent the rest of the year avoiding her advances. I still cringe when I think about that moment.

Love it when insecure guys of Veeky Forums "make it" and turn girls who think they are hot insecure.
I can only imagine all the girls crying. How that one user was so cold to them, when they actually just got turned down due to his autism.

>ywn have a fit qt to squat with

>shouts WULD

if this gets capped, put me in it

I know a dude who is in a long distance relationship with a girl he met on RS. Friends with both of them, they're both pretty chill.

They recently grinded 99 slayer together, and see each other a few times a year. She seems clingy af, always posting on facebook about her man, her relationship, their future, all that bullshit. But they seem happy.

You should probably be on some form of medication.

>mf after reading that

>when your autism ends up killing someone
Fucking what?
Who hurt you?

Omfg. This might be the most autistic thing ive seen on this korean panty sniffing website. Ive been laughing for 2 solid minutes

Dancing is for women and hippies. You did well.

I did something similar. I think it was over RS too. Had the girl call me and I was so scared that I hung up and never spoke to her again.