Hey Veeky Forums

That's what I am hoping. I imagine it was a culmination of events that happened to me as a child, and maybe in my teens, that led me to be this way.

Culture is just a made up social contract that benefits somebody whose revenue stream somehow depends on something never ever changing.
Accept who you are and move onto objective means of self improvement (improving your lifts as opposed to "improving" your sexual orientation).

Any idea how to unfuck myself? is it an issue with my masculinity?

Bro, everybody has something about them that they don't like and "wishes was normal".
This is the "price" of individually.
You can freak out about it till you die or you can swallow a hard pill and start mastering your reality.

But one of the reasons I lift is to become more attractive to the opposite sex. Then I realise that once they find out deep down who I am, and my fetishes, they'll be creeped out.

I'm not even talking about telling them my fetishes outright. It seeps into my body language, and choice of words. I don't like conflict or stepping on peoples toes, and I can't tell if this is because of my fetishes, or my fetishes are because of my lack of desire for conflict or confrontation.

stop watching porn bro. I am in the same dilemma with the cuck shit because of some shit that happened with an ex that fucked with my head big time. Keep hitting the gym and bettering yourself. Sometimes you relapse but it starts to happen less and less

And how have you been since the breakup? Managed to have sex with anyone else? I got fugged over by my ex bigtime too. We have a kid together though so it's harder to forget.

I mean, being a cuck means you can slay other bitches right?
Practically, maybe learn how to fight so confrontation no longer terrifies you?
IDK.
Also, bitches love fighters.
I was very serious about that culture thing. There is no reason you need to be loyal to that shit anymore than you feel like.

Yes multiple people. She cheated on me and gave me chlamydia and was screwing around with who knows how many more people. For a long time I excused her behavior while I was with her because I thought I wasn't good enough for her. I now realize I am way better than she will ever be. Started to swallow the redpill at this point and though I don't agree with everything they say, most of it rings true. In a way I am almost glad it happened because it taught me to respect myself 10x more and I would never take that kind of disrespect again. It is going to be harder because you have a kid and honestly I still think about her at least once a day in passing but time and effort is going to heal those wounds. She tried to talk to me at a bar recently on my birthday and I gave her absolutely 0 acknowledgement as another human being. I know the feelings of shame that come from the cuck shit and it is easy to sit in that self-loathing and misery. You need to prove to yourself that she hasn't broken you forever. I was absolutely shattered after all this shit happened and let me tell you the rebuild feels so fucking good when people compliment your gains or actively try to hang with you. My friends know my story and I have inspired several of them to get into the gym

youtube.com/watch?v=9mbp0DugfCA

This video helped. We are all going to make it bro

Okay so...

A) Strong women who know what they want and have half a brain are inherently hot AF. You're probably being triggered by the whole "OMG maybe she's not a fucking moron!" thing, or the "OMG she actually has some self fucking respect!!!"

Basically: it's not about you, it's about them. And that's normal.

B) Quit porn. Cold turkey, as of today. Don't go on /b/ or any of the porn boards. Cut out any other surfing you do that might involve porn. NONE. For how long? IDK, reply to this post and take the last 2 digits. That many days, then double it.

You'll be amazed at how it'll clear your head. You'll have infinity confidence and you'll get turned on by regular stuff.

C) 5.4 inches is average... I haven't measured in awhile but I think you're slightly bigger than me, and I make 'em scream. Big deal your friends have big cocks. It means they can't fuck as long and girls will break up with them over it (seriously a lot of relationships have ended because it hurts to fuck cocks that are too big every day)

D) 26 living at home is nothing. Takes awhile to get your footing sometimes. Just get a goal, ONE goal, and work towards it. Working towards a concrete goal makes your whole life feel better, trust me.

E) About the cuck thing - fuck it man there's nothing wrong with that. We all have our thing. I *wish* I found humiliation hot... kinda feel ripped off that I can't figure out out. Just make sure it's not *required*... it should be just one more thing in the huge list of stuff you like. But whatever man, if you like, you like. Fussing about it is like worrying about your preference of pizza toppings - it doesn't matter.

This user has good advice. I'd add in some meditation daily as well, don't forget to be introspective once you start hitting your goals.

Damn THAT'S what I forgot!

Vipassana saved me. Seriously. Here's a crash course, literally everything you need to start right now:

1: Go somewhere where nobody will bug you. Your room is fine but if you do it there, clear a special corner just for this.

2. Sit with your legs crossed. Eyes closed. If you have back problems you can lean on something but ideally you won't so you don't fall asleep by accident.

3. Mouth closed, breathe through the mouth. Focus on the breath - if you want to be more specific, focus on the sensation of breath moving across your upper lip.

4. When thoughts come, and you realize "oh look there's a thought", let them go and return your attention to your breathing.

5. If you remember to keep returning your attention to your breathing, over and over and over, keep coming back, you're doing it. You're doing Vipassana meditation, the real hardcore change-your-fucking-life shit.

6. Start with 5 minutes.It'll kill you. Trust me. Then try extending a little bit more every day.

You'd think this would be a pretty straightforward thing but I guarantee you you're gonna have LOTS of questions... lots of people out there you can ask. Do it.

2 corrections:

"Mouth closed, breathe through your NOSE"

and... most people sit on a cushion, forgot to mention...

To add onto this, I've discovered recently that having a goal isn't enough. You must make it a part of your daily activities to work toward it. Always consider what you could do to get closer, and make that activity a step that's necessary to continue. Complete as many steps a day as you can find time too.

I mean we could talk all day about goals but you're 100% right.

Your goal should consume your life.

That's how winning is done.

Nigga, you're too self absorbed, your dick is fine, shit, i bet you've never even used it o how the fuck do you know if its good or not (pro tip, its fine)

quit porn, get a job, move on with your life, your self reflecting on yourself is giving you major inferiority complexes, its hard but you have to make yourself feel worthwhile.

feel like you deserve to be loved, that youre worth something, that you care about yourself.

try some therapy to, might help.

>this
The internet got people with average dicks and heights feel insecure.
5.5 inches is a respectable sized penis

Your words are striking a chord with me. Thank you for emboldening me.

Thanks man. Like i said to the guy above, I appreciate you taking the time to reply.

The porn is the hardest thing. I've tried so many times, i'll go strong for 2 weeks with the gym, diet, and no porn, but then something stupid will happen, last time it was me being psuedo rejected by some girl, and that was it.

Feelings of inadequacy, weird feeling in my chest, get endorphines from porn to mask it.

Have you had issues with porn in the past?

If you look at any reputable study in korea, italy, uk, canada, nigeria, india where doctors measured dick size, 5.4 inches bone pressed is probably actually slightly above average. How do you know your buddies have big dicks? Because they told you so? How many guys add 2-3 inches to their height when somebody asks them how tall they are? Probably the same amount who add 1-2 inches to their dick size. In any case who the fuck cares how big your buddy's cocks are?

Stop watching porn, that shit fucks with your head regardless, but the angles and tiny people are doing nothing for your dick insecurity. Put a 7" dick on a guy who is 5'5" and you've now got a monster cock, if hes got a slightly smaller girth relative to length, it looks even longer. Add in a girl who is 5'0'' and now he looks normal height with a huge cock thats as big as her head, add camera angles and holy shit all these guys are monsters! How can I compete?

It's not real life man, you are worth more than being treated like shit.

Porn & Experience

Pushing the character limit here, so let me be brief.

It gets easier. Know that and remember it. However, when you cave it'll get a little tougher.

Ask yourself how badly you want not be dependent on it.

Your father didn't run to porn when things got tough, nor his father's father. They brushed it off and kept going, it's the reason you're here.

You gotta replace that habit with something else. Reading, music, writing, whatever.

Some days you'll not even have an urge and it'll be great. You'll feel like you're getting somewhere, but then the next you'll be exceptionally horny or bored and prone to thoughts.

That is where I've caught myself failing. You allow yourself to fall into a spell where it's okay to think about it or it's okay to feel yourself up. It's okay just to look at something to take the edge off. You're not going to do anything, until you do.

Habits are tough to break, and easy to fall into. But the only thing that will end it is you. Catch yourself in these moments and immediately do something to take your mind off it if you don't have the will to say no. Anything, go for a walk, read, just do something to get past it and move on. You can't let it shake you.

Remember where you've come from and where you're going. After a month the very thought of losing is an insult after having struggled so much.

You don't want porn in your life. Don't think about it, don't fantasize, don't get nostalgic.

I'm not saying do this the rest of your life or running into something will fuck you up, but you must normalize a life without porn before it gets very easy.

Though, I can't say for certain considering I'm struggling with it myself. However, I'm knocking the habit of masturbation for personal reasons so things will be a bit easier for you in that regard. Stick to interpersonal fantasies, give the women voices, personalities. There's more to sex than bumping and grinding, it's an intimate moment with another human being.

Forgot this. It may help as a reminder in other situations where your thoughts hold power.

"The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature." - Marcus Aurelius

Oh, and I'm not the same dude as the one you replied to. user boards are such fun.