Brehs what do I say? "Yeah, are you a gains goblin?" Idk

Terrible opener. Shows you have no confidence in yourself.
This is literally how you friendzone yourself.

Also, that picture looks like a catfish. Take a screenshot of the profile.

fuck this guy it's funny and is working so don't stop. ask her if she wants to see your panda dick

no it didnt hahahah

like i said its obvious how hard u sat there thinkin of something randumb and ironic.

stop tryin so hard

Can I get advice on what to say next then

Show the full profile with the bio and everything

(or a large hill)

...

given how flavourless your responses have been so far i'd say you've ticked that no personality box no issues.

...

Would appreciate advice my dude

Show the first pic. Whats with the edits lol. Just seems suss.

Exif data. People like to dox

Brehs help

Reply with "what did you just say to me you little bitch?"

"Good, that means you won't put up much of a struggle."
Will make her wet, 100 percent gaurenteed.

I'd use "cardio bunny" instead of autistically negging her by calling her a goblin, but whatevs.

Dude come on

Oh I bet you get all the pussy, you angsty tard.

gotta be careful with that sort of aggressive flirting. posing it as a question might work, like "so you wouldn't put up much of a struggle, eh?" maybe throw in a winky emoji if she's that kind of sloot, but as a statement the whole thing comes off as a bit rapey.

more?

I know what the fuck I'm talking about faggot. Do it.

or even turn it around like "Oh that's too bad, I like a girl who can put up a struggle"

Yeah I don't know how receptive she would be to that. I'm not attractive enough to say that to her

"I'm that gorilla dick nigga, I make dyke pussy wet"

That actually might be better.

Just say
>Quit trying to set me up for shitty one liners to get your cunt stirring, you gonna piss on those jean shorts for me or what

i can make your knees weak
>autism

Say "Must squat two plate ride this ride"

>t.virgin

this is more of a line that you say in person to segue into sex after a few drinks.

you have to be clever and witty in text because of the fact that they can go back and read it again in a different mood. if you say "sexy" shit while you're horny they might respond positively in the moment, but when they read it the next day they're just gonna be like "what the fuck that's so dumb i'm totally not gonna fuck this guy"

...

that's a bold move, cotton. let's see if it pays off for him.

JUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUST

I'm getting head, and you have to use tinder lol

Bold move.

Huh, you actually salvaged something out of the retarded shit I said

Good job OP, dont think its that bad

I fucked a girl this month for the first time
kinda disappointing

yea we're all aware that prostitution exists.

Yeah I really liked your response aside from the vulgarity my dude

GL op because that fucking sucked.

What would you have said? Girls like guys who lift and have "dorky" humor dude

"haha, got me. You know how it is,every ho needs a pimp, but I'm not sure you could handle it ;)"
grils love it when you flip the switch, call her out on being only interested in your body, tell her you to forget about nudes and that if she sends pussy pics the conversation is over because "girls are always doing that, and it's gross"
she'll get it and she'll like it, it shows you "get it" too
The bigger the stereotype the better, just flip it and she'll play along

This guy gets it.
Do this but a bit more subtle.

>You know how it is,every ho needs a pimp
he's going after middle class+ tinder white girls, not brown instagram thots.

Girls like to have there panties drenched.

im interested in the asian with the confederate flag tho

They need build up though and depending on the girl it can take awhile

there is nothing that gets a girl more excited than the prospect of setting up some "hang out" time with a guy she finds attractive. the thought will stew in her mind.

>these are the people giving workout advice on twitter

well I suppose it keeps you away from the nukes eh Kim?

Kek, I guess you can't lift away your insecurities :^)

No response yet op?

Went quiet on you breh?

Mission failed, we'll get em next time

idiot

Is that why she went silent?

That’s it boys, pack it up

>Yeah, are you a gains goblin
Literally the perfect reply

>every ho needs a pimp
That only works on niggers

She wearing those hoe socks so bury it and get her pregnant and than dip out. Who gaf about your slick game bish