User, is that you? Wow, you look so much different!

Yeah, I was probably skinnier when you saw me! *wink* Sounds good, how have y’all been?

>"Yeah, I've been hitting the Wii Zumba"
>Grab a glass and flex a 'cep
>"How's this for a start"
Then I'd wink and sit down, and enjoy the rest of my day with them. Then again I'm not autistic like you guys.

>s-s-sorry I only drink onion juice

>s.. sure
>so user what else do you do besides working out
>mfw i do noghing else
>mfw they are all looking at me laughing
My palms are sweaty just typing this
Why am i like this

The only good response

>M-MILK TRUCK JUST ARRIVE??!??!?!??!?!

>"Why don't you have a drink of THIS!?"
>Whip out my dick and make all of them suck it

>j-just water please, d-don't want to lose gains
what
>g-gains

Hearty kek

Rip off my stripper shirt, music playing I get up on the table and start grinding my hips while pouring champagne into their open mouths.
Then again I know how to use my gains

> Implying girls would remember who I am at all.
If that was the case, I wouldn't be here

Better have lots of booze because once I have 1 drink I can't stop drinking until I'm completely wasted

>what do you mean i look different?
>ARE YOU MAKING FUN OF ME???
>have a drink with you?
>WHY? WHAT DID YOU DO TO IT???

>sit down
>Rosè all day ladies!
>oh user! teehee

>Oh, hey Stacy, been a while. You're looking well.
>Wow user, what a broad chest and quads you've developed! Why don't you let me and Cindy take you into the bathroom and you can use our holes to satisfy all your desires.
>Well, if you insist.

That looks like a really stupid place to sit down. Right beside a road? Ugh

i have to return some video tapes

>"Sure, I have a few minutes!"
>starts normal
>maintain that fake smile I've been forcing myself to wear so as not to seem autistic
>start sweating profusely through the conversation
>can't focus on anything other than the sweat
>beads of sweat dripping down my forehead
>tell them I've got to run
>walk sideways away from the table so they don't see my sweat drenched backside

fml

You should come to NYC and you can eat dinner next to bags of stinking garbage stacked 4 feet high and homeless people hitting you up for money.

I laught more than i should

>hmmmm
>remember how these people once rejected me because of how I looked
>”nah I’m going to head to the gym, gotta get my work out in for the day. Maybe another time”
>walk away knowing I just rejected the people who use to reject me.
>feels great.

yes, because I'm not a raging autist.

30+y/o independent women doing the classic "coffee till cocktails" routine where they have diarrhea in the mouth about their 50k/year job, laser tattoo removal and the newest cock they're riding all while numbing the anxiety of no longer being in their twenties with wine, carbs, and feel good talks about still being single

I wait tables at a fine dining restaurant and overhear cunts like this all the time. One time I heard a woman literally say it was misogynistic that she couldn't buy wine on sunday.

you do realize i can't buy my whiskey on sunday too, right?

ps you can narrow my state down based on this law pretty quick

Yes, somewhere in the goddamn bible belt.

Yeah what's up with the trash in NYC? Why don't they do something about it, I refuse to believe they're lacking in funds

Britain is a much nicer place

Where in philly do you work

> goddamn bible belt.
which isn't so bad if you're in the right city.
>conservative
>freedom
>warmer winters
>salt of the earth people

...

you forgot
>niggers, spics, and general mystery meat everywhere

If you live south of I-70 or in California, you are in da POC zone

Ladies, I'm from the future - I'm here to warn you that in approximately five hours from now, two androids of merciless rage will come and kill every thot in existence created from Dr. Rodgers.

This. And then they are all like
>"omaigawd it's justa drink!"
REEEEE FUCK OFF MY BODY MY CHOICE

name one place to live that is rainbows and unicorns and nigger free and rich and has 24/7 everything and is 99% white and has great nightlife and doesn't have congestion blah blah blah

nowhere is perfect
fuck california hard tho

>haha ladies well i decided to get in shape for a reason, do you have a few minutes to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

Easy pussy, they look 30+ and their options are limited

Hahahah

you don't know shit. They *were* easy pussy, and now they're holding out for prince charming and a life partner at that age

i don't know how people can do this. so fucking annoying, and it's awkward as shit to eat with normies walking by. rooftop/courtyard seating or nothing

Fuck off with ur social poisons roasties.

...

OP here: FYI these girls were 25-27 when i saved this

>flexes a cep
and then i would probably just say some shit like sup but you faggots wouldnt do shit

kek i noticed her too
She also have that "I know" face.

are you me? what is wrong with us. Im a very social person too but man when i do feel awkward the sweat unleashes

You girls have any hotter younger sisters?

Sure

>can't buy alcohol on certain days
nice third world country you got there user

(puts thumbs in belt loops) Texas

classic; never fails to crack a smile

fellow hoosier

They're all like 40

Hyperhydrosis. There's medication for it.

I say nothing, and get out of Chad's way so he can join the girls.

"of course!, do you have anything other than white wine"

"menus aren't laminated 1/10 would not dine"
>walks off

Its always a row of goodlooking women. Or average at least.

Come on guys, lets see some fat trashy gross family members.

>"Yeah, I've been hitting the Wii Zumba"

Why is that even a problem? Just buy a little extra some other day and save it for later.

Sorry, im only attracted to twinks

dont say anything, just go to the restroom to clean up the otter pop sleeve worth of precum that just dripped out my cock because a woman talked to me.
then take a handful of xanax and come back to the table so i dont fuck anything up.

Have you tried the meds? I'm not the user you replied to but I'm in the same boat.

We like cuddling! Muscles are disgusting! We don’t like men who are obsessed with the gym! We want to look better than the man!” they would say.

At this point, I started getting annoyed with their behavior, and asked them the following question:

“What type of man are you looking for?”

They paused for a second, and replied “Well, obviously a nice guy that’s going to treat us with respect, and who can communicate in a way that does not offend us.”

At this moment, I had a big smirk on my face, knowing damn well that what I was about to say next would cause them to flip out.

“So then why do you cheat on your boyfriends for asshole guys like me?” I exclaimed.

They were silent for a few seconds, and then suddenly went full bitch mode.

“You’re such an asshole, Alex! You don’t talk to a lady like that! Go fuck yourself! You don’t know what a woman likes!” they screamed.

Of course, their words didn’t faze me.

I just sat there in a calm and collected fashion, as I sipped on my cool glass of zippy water.

After about 5 minutes of them ranting at me, I cut them off and said “So when are we fucking? Next Tuesday or next Saturday?”

They quickly glanced at each other, as their eyes and mouths widened.

“What did you just say???” they barked.

“You heard me. Are we fucking next Tuesday or next Saturday?”

Interestingly enough, they started giggling and eventually began playing my game.

They would say things like “You are so bold! You are so bad! You are something else!”

Just as expected, they were coming on to me.

>Drink
I THINK YOU MEAN S I P

"no, thanks. i dont drink anymore. im an alcoholic working the AA program. i better get going i have to meet my gym partner in 15. it was nice seeing you stacy."

Wtf, how is his face fat while his bodies cut? Looks like he has a double chin.

>Not now ladies, I gotta go to the-
*flex a cep*
>-gun show.

dips on that one

mfw when the chick at the bus stop is hotter

y-you too

you wouldn't actually do that though

Congrats, you're on r/Veeky Forums

>Ha, yes it is me, while Iv'e been on hiatus I have been mewing and eating onions for the test boosts, it works really well
>*smiles and accidentally bumps into table*

Picture is from Chicago, that's a Chicago cab company

hey, so this migrant crisis sure is something right?

I had this too. There's a deodorant called Drysol that pretty much stops sweating completely, although after a few uses it causes a fucking horrible itch. You apply it every couple of days.

I used it for a few months and the problem stopped, haven't used it for a long time and still don't sweat badly at all. Give it a try.

>rip off my anime shirt
>sabaton playing
>I get up on the table
>the table breaks

Sure, I need a drink if I’m going to fuck any of you haha. Negging at its finest. Getting laid for sure.

hahahaha

"No thanks, I'm busy, but (pick the name of the one you like the most if you know them all) give me a shout and let's grab drinks sometime."
Then walk away. I'm not at a goddamn restaurant by myself and I'm not going to abandon my friends for a bunch of stupid ass thots that didn't give me the time of day until I got yolked. Literally the only answer.

and lose mah gainz? LMAO

*going back to home*

>Why don't you sit down and have a drink with us?!
Veeky Forums taught me well. I tell them that I’m too busy right now to signal that I’m high in demand, I also make it clear that I don’t wanna drink with them to show them that I’m not thirsty.

>drinking
>being such as massiv loser to need booze
>destroying my gains

Piss off!

HAI LEDDIT!!

Autism

Sitting and drinking wine that close to a public road.

Might as well just inhale the fumes right form the road.

underrated

*teleports behind you*

H-hi daddy

“I have a turkey in the oven that needs basting, got to go. Good seeing you though”

...