MtG Weird and Awful Cards

The point was to be the first -1/-1 creature. Then they went 'what can we do with a -1/-1 creature?'

Since this was pre-M10, you could block with this thing to trade with an X/3, sac it to kill something else, then get a free raise dead. Three-for-Ones are never totally unplayable.

they could of told the artist to drawn something besides a giant zit with other zits on top of it.

...

this fucking card

Has anyone built a deck around this?

Nope. too new of a card for any deck to have been built around it.

OP in prismatic, but shit everywhere else
>Prismatic: minimum 250 cards, must have at least 20 cards of each colour

There's a pretty fun Legacy deck built around it.

>Battle of Wits
>Me and mates played it when Standard legal
>Do okay with it
>Laugh everytime we attempt to shuffle
Priceless

you'd have to have at least 250 to have any kind of chance of drawing this wincon right?

this card is the reason wizards changed tournament shuffling rules from '5 minutes maximum', to 'a reasonable ammount of time'

I chuckled

At least it's an instant?

hard counter to gitgud toad, op pls nerf

>rare
Can you imagine anything more disappointing than pulling Mudhole from a booster?

Players can't play lands.
Lands can't enter the battlefield.
At the beginning of each upkeep, any player may sacrifice two lands or have Worms of the Earth deal 5 damage to him or her. If a player does either, destroy Worms of the Earth.

neat, gitgud stax time

Soooo your plan is to suicide your own lands to nothing just so your opponents can't play their own lands?

Nice, a black Lava Axe

not that user, but i'd assume the plan would be to play that on turn 5, hopefully your opponent is still on four mana or less, and this means you stalemate with them you on 5 mana, them on 4 until they either take the two mana hit or 5 lifepoints.

i'm not saying it's good, but it doesn't require you to sacrifice your own lands.

Is it really? They are so damn incredible

That's the kind of cards I like, and I'm sure a playset will cost 10¢

Posting the OG weird card. Can somebody explain the art?

Not 100% sure, but I'm pretty sure I was a piece of artwork by Richard Garfield's Aunt.

well it was done by Fay Jones who never ever did another card ever apart from this one, so that tells you somthing.
also, apparantly she was an established artist, and did this as a favour (?) for her nephew or somthing or rather mumble mumble
schoolchildren were involved.

if I had to guess as to the meaning of the art,
I'd say the blue guy is you, the player, and he is vomiting blue to represent his disgust in himself in playing such a scummy colour.
you are sitting opposite your opponent on a level, balanced playing field, and you notice your opponent is a cunning fox, a metaphor of course for every MTG player that doesn't play blue, due to having some kind of critical thinking capability.
then there is a cresent moon, and a painters tray no fucking idea, it was probably looking a bit dull.
moral of the story, you are a bad person and you should feel bad for playing blue

have a gander at this one

It's easy to find weird cards in Timespiral.

> hating a colour
> not even a theme or sub set
> just the colour

i'm just interpreting the art in front of me man.
this piece just screams "fuck blue!"

People wouldn't hate blue if it wasn't so overpowered.
What is the point in paying 6 mana for a Craw Wurm if it can be hit by Counterspell for 2 mana and or even worse by Control Magic for 4 mana?

>Play Shahrazad
>Fork
>laugh maniacally

That's fucking evil

>run 4 shahrazads
>run 4 forks
>go to FNM
>play multiple games within games
>die a slow lonely death by yourself with no friends

Someone please tell me what this fucking thing does, or how is it useful

cheap carddraw for hellbent/madness?

if you are playing a deck that just uses up the hand, this card basically draws you more cards.

draw draw draw

so if im reading this right, and you enter upkeep with a card in your hand you DONT draw an additional card and just take 1 damage?
or you DO still draw and take one damage?
and you still draw directly after this card resolves?

And why would I play that instead of, for example, a Howling mine or ?

At the beginning of your upkeep:
If you have a card, you get pinged
If you don't, you draw a card

one less mana and tapping a mana every turn respectively.

fuck what's that card you have to hide things from your opponent? i can't find it
it's wacky as shit

There are decks that are built around an empty hand, having some extra draws is helpful.

Howling Mine is symmetrical, and your opponents will always get the benefit of an extra draw before you will

Grafted Skullcap is one mana more expensive

its quite cheap at 3 and it only gets you cards,
maybe someone uses it as a backup for some other carddraw in an EDH deck

>racism

Goblin Game?

YES
holy shit I have no idea what this card wants the players to do.

Everyone bets life. The lowest bidder loses had their life in addition to their bet. It's not hard

fuck yeah nigga, this + venser is great

its easy. All players hide a number of objects of their choosing. (hide meaning whatever so long as the other players cant see how many you hid). Then simultaneously all show their things. Each players looses life equal to the items they hid. THEN the person who hid the least objects looses half their remaining life.

It is a shit card but only JUST barely. If the damage instances were swapped (looser loses half his life THEN takes damage for each item hidden) then it could kill at some pretty high numbers.

You guys need to read more if you can't understand what these cards do. Neither of them are very complicated.

I use it to remove from my graveyard lands and useless stuff before I shuffle it back into my library with Feldon's cane in my Pauper Fog deck

what?

hide what objects? my deck? tokens? that coin in my back pocket? what if we are playing in an open field? are we reqired to have non-game items avaliable? or can we hide things that are in play?

it's ambiguious as fuck.

Read The Fucking Card. Hide whatever the fuck you want. You're the only person who I've ever heard of having trouble understanding this card

sweet, so i'm picking up my opponents deck and hiding it.

litterally how the card is worded.

Usually you don't hide anything.
It's all numbers anyway. You just pick numbers.

Sure but a deck or more specifically in this case an opponents deck itself counts only as one object. If you pick up two different opponent's decks that are both individually one objects each you are considered to have two objects.

i'm just going to stop.
goblin game is fucking stupid.

No it's not you drooling retard, a deck is not an object it's a stack of cards, and you can't rearrange your opponent's library unless something tells you to do exactly that. Are you this fucking dumb on purpose or is it just by accident

Yes, but it's more or less soft banned in competitive live Magic due to you being unable to provide a sufficiently randomized deck to your opponent within the three minutes you have to shuffle. You can totally play it on Magic Online though.

Still, I remember seeing some lists of it being played in tournies back in the day. I also remember that people who played the said they were very amused by how people would sideboard in stuff like enchantment removal against them, saying something akin to
>"My deck is 250 cards, there's literally no way I can consistently draw anything in my deck that you have sideboarded in hate against."

>a deck is not an object it's a stack of cards
cards are objects
the sleeves are objects
the playmat is an object
the table is an object
the rules section of the card instruct players to hide objects
it's not my problem MTG AND goblins game doesn't define an object, so I have to fall back to the linguistic definition of an object.

The card is fucking dumb, the wording is dumb, and the mechanic is dumb. whether Im fucking dumb on purpose or not is irrelevant.

>a deck is not an object it's a stack of cards

Uhhhhhh what.

Guess what that stack of cards form? An object called a deck.

>Yes, but it's more or less soft banned in competitive live Magic due to you being unable to provide a sufficiently randomized deck to your opponent within the three minutes you have to shuffle.

It's not soft banned in any form in competitive live Magic.

Trust me on this, I was at GP Melbourne and watched some guy play a Battle of Wits deck in the Super Sunday Series event.

i thought this card was the reason they had to change the wording on how long you had to shuffle to "a reasonable ammount of time"

>-1/-1

But why? Wouldn't it just die when it hit 0 toughness?

Yeah, but this forces you to use 2+ colours to have it live.

But that's not super clear, because "object" also has a meaning in the game rules. If you have to hide objects that are actually in the game, that could allow other players to know what your number is.

I would put this up there as a weird one, mainly because Wizards had NO IDEA how to actually get it to work when it was first printed. They actually errata'd it to an Enchantment at one point. Then Time Spiral and Suspend came around and they figured out a way to get it working.

>tfw your store has a "Physical punishment" rule so subhumans like you never come

Last time a little subhuman tried to pull illegal shit we beat his shit in, when he was crying for the judge he came with a sledge hammer and LITERALLY destroyed his cock and balls, we call him now "Jimmy the cucked cockless".

OBJECT
An object is any concrete "thing" in a game of Magic: an ability on the stack, a card, a copy of a card, a token, a spell, a permanent, or an emblem.
...
...
109.5. The words “you” and “your” on an object refer to the object’s controller, its would-be controller (if a player is attempting to play, cast, or activate it), or its owner (if it has no controller). For a static ability, this is the current controller of the object it’s on. For an activated ability, this is the player who activated the ability. For a triggered ability, this is the controller of the object when the ability triggered, unless it’s a delayed triggered ability

soooo
an object can be an activated ability on a card?
that doesn't seem like an object.

Rough, what'd he do?

i thought you were being autistic at first but i get your point now
this is easily exploitable

I hide 2 coins. If the opponent hid less objects, great, I win, if they hid 2 or 3 I say I hid 4 coin sides and I still win

Hence why the gatherer advises you announce what type of objects you are hiding. If anyone tried to honestly pull his autistic faggotry, they should be punched

Gatherer does not advice you to do that. What Gatherer actually says is:

>When it comes to choice of items, use common sense. Items should be small enough to hide but large enough to count. Make it clear what kind of object you are hiding beforehand. For example, one player may choose coins and the other may choose dice. If you can’t find something convenient to hide, write numbers on a piece of paper and reveal the numbers. Make sure the numbers are unambiguous (for example, underline a 6 or 9 so it can’t be misread).

>common sense
Goblin Game is so poorly thought out and worded that the official ruling is that common sense is the arbiter.

At least post the one with the great ass.

>Make it clear what kind of object you are hiding beforehand.

Fuck off autismfag

exactly.
you could reveal the top 4 cards of your graveyard, announce "these were the things I was hiding" count your opponents, and then say the activated ablility on one of those cards counts for another object.

it's fucking outragous, I know in practice, 99% of the time the actual play will probably go somthing like but the fact the rules would allow a player to run with something like this just goes to point out this card's shitty wording and mechanics.
it's just a dumb card

whoever wrote the rule section of GG should be punched for sure.
players using this card should be punched on a where-needed basis.

thats gay
you're gay

That's nothing, I was playing EDH with teams and one of the guys on the other team had this in a deck full of white and blue instants and sorceries and also Eye of the Storm, and the other guy on his team had Eye of the Storm in a red and blue deck full of instants and sorceries, it spiraled out of control instantly. White-and-blue guy's primary strategy was to use this card over and over again using his own eye of the storm until the other player just rolled their eyes and folded, with two of them it was fucking ridiculous, there were like a dozen new games in the first couple turns of it being played.

Anyways, it was a bullshit move, but I thought it was hilarious at the time, even though I rolled my eyes and forfeited.

the reason is that you can't play this in mono colored decks (althought it would be extremely shitty there even wenn 0/0...)

wouldn't you eventually fuck them up if you played all those subgames though?
they can't have much utility if they built two decks around gimicks like that.
and their life would move closer and closer to 1 every game

Can you forfeit one or more of the sub-games and not the main game?

More importantly it means that using five colors only gives you two activations with no 1/1 left to chump and forces you to go five colors to get all the activations you can out of it. The card is horrendously bad, but the design is mostly logical.

No, that's a chicken. Not gay. Even if it was a guy, you can still appreciate the fact that he has a nice ass.

Fuck, auto correct. Meant to say chick.

>No, that's a chicken
look mate.
Im no expert on chickens or negros, but i can tell you that is no chicken.

i see this, but I'm still gunna post because Im tenacious.

A chicken is fine too...

I'd assume so

they could never actually kill you with this strat, you'd round up to one life every time you folded.

>a deck full of white and blue instants...
>a red and blue deck full of instants...
>it spiraled out of control instantly