Quotes

Best one IMO.

I'm always looking for new and creative ways to add puns into my game that will really make my players groan.

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fuck

meta as fuck

"The line dividing good and evil runs through the heart of every human being, and who is willing to destroy a piece of their own heart?"

"If thou art pained by any external thing, it is not this thing that disturbs thee, but thy own judgement about it. And it is in thy power to wipe out this judgement now. But if anything in thy own disposition gives thee pain, who hinders thee from correcting thy opinion? And even if thou art pained because thou art not doing some particular thing which seems to thee to be right, why dost thou not rather act than complain?- But some insuperable obstacle is in the way?- Do not be grieved then, for the cause of its not being done depends not on thee.- But it is not worth while to live if this cannot be done.- Take thy departure then from life contentedly, just as he dies who is in full activity, and well pleased too with the things which are obstacles. "

> This is not the day I die.
> This is for X!
> You have forgotten the face of your father!
> Apologize to my mule.
> There's two kinds of men in this world, X: Men with guns, and men who dig. You dig.
> It looks like you won't be making the train for Marrakesh.
> ... 'Do I feel lucky?' Well do ya, punk?
> The North remembers.

In the same vein as the last one, I've been waiting forever for an enemy NPC to say "So it begins," to set me up to say, "No, so it ends."

This works.

>Being a sniper takes 99 percent tears and 0 percent compassion

NPC before a PC does something crazy
>"what do you think this is? A game!?!"
BBEG interrogating a PC
>"you have information I want. i'm going to hurt to get it. at first you may lie for protection so I will hurt you some more. then you will tell me the truth but since you've already lied I wont be able to tell if what you've said is the truth so I will hurt you again, and again, and again until you tell me anything you think I might want to know. by then you'll be broken and useless to me so you will die."
after witnessing something incredibly destructive or dangerous
>"nope. fuck that."
I cry your pardon sai. I have forgotten the face of my father

...

Muscle Wizard would like word with you.

Oh, I forgot "You might as well be arguing with a hurricane."

Long days and pleasant nights, Ka-mate.

Inspirobot knows. Inspirobot understands.

Jaden Smith? Is that you?

Oh wow, it actuality made a good one.

and may you have twice as many.

Paranoid? Probably. But just because you're paranoid doesn't mean there isn't an invisible demon about to eat your face

I love this Quote, and it matches my play style.

"But I am the Revelation! The Tiger-Force at the core of all things! When you cry out in your dreams — it is I that you see!"

>What are some killer quotes you've always wanted to include in your game?
DUCK!

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This ones pretty much going into my Rogue Trader game.

I would hope i was the ONLY man in the marriage.

>get o load of this guy. He wants to marry a woman.
>what a fag

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>killer quotes

>534 Death Row inmates have been executed in Texas since 1982.
>These are their last words.

goodbyewarden.com/#358

Enjoy.

i swear ive heard this exact phrase on /a/. those little girls get the weirdest boners all the time

>I found Jesus and want to love people and be nice now that I'm gonna die and don't have to actually back my words with actions
>I'm innocent!
>I love you! Sorry!
>Nothing to say. I'm gonna die. Bye.

These kinda suck. Then again I'm used to reading this kind of shit. Bunch or people saying worthless stuff that doesn't mean anything now that their life is on the line for the shit they did. I'm not saying people shouldn't read this but there's nothing unique or quotable after 50 or so texts.

>GM promises a magic item/quest for one if I manage 20 puns in one session
>will never manage this, but still annoy the fuck out of everyone with puns
The "I want to kill you" smile is the best.

>(Mumbled something about he wished his whole life would have been spent as Islamic.)
>Walter
Now thats a quote.

>You all brought me here to be executed, not to make a speech. That’s it.
This one's kinda cool.

>all these quotes regarding jesus christ and god

Man, this system is fucked up.

It's the only good one so far. I can see that being used in a game.

>I’m ready to be released. Release me.

I always thought this bit sounded cool from An Essay On Man sounded cool:
"Placed on this isthmus of a middle state,
A being darkly wise and rudely great:
With too much knowledge for the skeptic side,
With too much weakness for the stoic's pride,
He hangs between; in doubt to act or rest;
In doubt to deem himself a god, or beast;
In doubt his mind or body to prefer;
Born but to die, and reasn'ing but to err;
Alike in ignorance, his reason such,
Whether he thinks too little or too much."

Just any line from Five Finger Death Punch songs.
This one is especially cool:
You own a clock, your time is up.
You bottom feeders, it's just time to give up.

I feel like this AI is getting too smart.

While I agree quoting FFDP is a great idea, you really could have gone for a better verse than that.

Yes, I didn't listen to all of their songs and could forget something...

I didn't mean to offend user, i only meant to lament list opportunities. I would have gone with something more along the lines of I've got the scars to prove that only the strong survive, or I'm going to punch you so hard it'll feel like you kissed a fucking freight train.

>What is better? To be born good, or through great effort overcome your evil nature? -Paarthurnax

>in response to BBEG asking why I keep getting back up to fight
Because my legs aren't broken yet. Because my vision hasn't blurred yet. Because my lungs still draw breath.

>Monologue for the BBEG that I'm finally going to be able to use in an upcoming session
"Winning or losing? At this, final, stage it matters not. We've built and torn down empires you and I. We've killed thousands, destroyed everything in our path, and been to hell and back to reach this point. I care not for who the victor is nor do you. No, the outcome of this war, this conflict is of no consequence to either of us now. I am here to kill you, and you are here to kill me. All that truly matters is the legends that will be born out of this, final confrontation. All that matters is this final duel.
All that matters now is who kills who upon this ground today. Make this fight a good one, dear hero, for I may finally cross blades with one who is my equal, and ballads will be sung for centuries about this duel.

Good fortune to you my mortal foe, may your blade strike swift and true and ever seek your opponents heart."

>Show me how the gods kill
The LG cleric was never the same after that one.

you mah nigga

Why the hell did you do that when I explicitly told you not too? Didn't we all agree that I was in charge of this mission?

>Dunno, let's ask Mister Corpsey here. Hey Mister Corpsey is Steve in charge?

>"If he is, he's sure doing a shit job of it. Look how many prisoners you just executed."

>Well you heard him, now help me figure out which one was hiding the key.

I fucking hate you, all of you.

No offence taken, bro.

>after hearing that monologue
I cast magic missile :^)

>"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls... Dyin' time's here."

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>I'm ready to go home.
Not the most original, but still great.

Little piggy, little piggy, what do you see?
You're lookin' at death when you're lookin' at me
Little piggy, little piggy, what should you do?
I am the devil and I'm comin' for you

>I am ready for the final blessing.
Damn. Gonna use this for some warlock BBEG or some shit.

> If you say one word about this I will crack open your skull, scoop out your brains, and bake them into a pie.

>Impossible, is there anything more important than getting a little girl

pretty edgy tbqphwy

Just so many from Mattis, a few of which I've managed to weave in.
“I come in peace. I didn’t bring artillery..but I’m pleading with you, tears in my eyes. If you fuck with me, I will kill you all”

“There are hunters and there are victims. By your discipline, cunning, obedience and alertness, you will decide if you are a hunter or a victim”

“I’m going to plead with you, do not cross us. Because if you do, the survivors will write about what we do here for 10,000 years”

>tbqphwy
what the fuck this can stand for

GRANT US EYES

"Burn what thou hast adored, and adore what thou hast burned."

>two big queer penises hung watching yaoi

"No" - Peter
Peter is too cool for last words.

to be quite ??? honest with you
I think

>"I will kill you SO HARD you will DIE to death!"
>"How does being the villain feel? I'd expect it starts with something like a slow burning, a refusal to realize the truth. Then comes the inner debate about what you had to do, who deserved what and how it was in the heat of the moment- it was all worth it, you'll see. After that? An overwhelming sickness as you come to comprehend what you've just done, and how much of a monster you really are. Kind of like the stages of loss, except what you lose is yourself."
>"Ever been to Hell? I hear they're big on irony."
>"Now you'll know what helplessness is like."

kek
thanks

Nice. Can I steal the second one?

I have a list of snappy lines just in case I find the appropriate time to use them.

>God is not here, just me.
>I never forget a face, but in your case I'd be glad to make an exception.
>The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
>You better drop that blade, or you won't even believe what happens next, even while it's happening.
>Sit your five dollar ass down before I make change.

Feel free.

I've always wanted a bard that would always introduce himself as "a man of wealth and taste"

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It's actually from a song from The Hobbit's soundtrack, just google "I See Fire"

>"There has been too much violence. Too much pain. But I have an honorable compromise. Just walk away."

How does one even go about doing that?

>The only kind of 'witty' you are is a fuckwit.

Micolash, pls go

With lots of lube

Nice user, nice

>
Unsure if this user is still here or not but the closest quotation I've heard to your spoiler text is the words of PFC Martin, 325th Glider Infantry Regiment. A armored division was retreating through the Ardennes during the Battle of the Bulge, Martin looked up and asked, "Are you looking for a safe place?" "Yeah" answered the tanker. "Well, buddy," he drawled, "just pull your vehicle behind me...
I'm the 82nd Airborne, and this is as far as the bastards are going."

Paraphrased by my Pyromancer.

Thanks man

I just wanna play a LG paladin who is polite and sophisticated the entire game until at the last second he looks at the BEEG and goes
Git fucked