Help me Veeky Forums

I'm dming a game for some friends who have never played an rpg before, we're playing d&d 5e (plz no bully) what is a short, fun campaign for lvl 1s? (also i have no physical map and no minis) (pic unrelated)

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Short campaign for 1st level characters in 5e? Chase a cat, though I must tell you, fudge cat rolls or else you'll end with a TPK.

kek'd, but seriously. i need it for tomorrow.

Don't play DnD. It'll ruin you. And not in a good way. Want Fanatsy? Off the top of my head: Reign, Torchbearer, Runequest. There's many more. Don't buy before you have played. DnD only lives off of advertising, it's a horrible game.

D20 will only make everyone believe RPGs have to be convoluted, arbitrary, and offensively shallow to fulfill some Big Bang Theory trope.

Please learn what adventure and campaign mean, respectively.

Keep it simple and focus on mechanics first. Have a little fetch quest with one combat encounter, it's plenty to demonstrate the rules. Published modules are overwhelming for first timers.

And get some Veeky Forums images. This jock shit is offensive.

Lost Mine of Phandelver is an easy, short campaign from 1st to 5th level.

Takes between 5-6 sessions. Remember than in 5e in 1 session you can level from 1st to 3rd level easily, the first two levels are short as fuck, literally one combat each.

thank you, first decent answer!
>implying i don't lurk Veeky Forums

i.4cdn.org/tg/1461606389761.pdf

Here, from the PDF thread.

To be honest, I think I should bully you. Play something else, man. Why swim in garbage on purpose?

If you want crunchy shit there are a quadrifucktillion options, and if you want better shit there's OSR stuff and Tavern Tales. Turn your kink positive. Swim in fertilizer, not toxic garbage.

Were you raped by D&D? What happened for you and your kin to post this in every thread?

Holy fuck, you need to get fucked.

D&D is great, and pretending otherwise because you're so butthurt makes you look like a contrarian tool hipster.

This desu

>D&D is great
I'm not him, but lets not blatantly lie, DnD is ok, and some editions are more ok than others.

And in reality what makes a game great is the group, you can have a fantastic game with FATAL even though FATAL is worse than canned shit. Flawed system can proportionate good games if the group know how to avoid or rework the flaws.

Ask this in the D&D 5e general.

By 'campaign', do you mean a multi session adventure or a true dozens of settings multiple adventure campaign?

You do not need minis with 5e. Do it all narrative, will work fine. In fact, probably better. Just don't throw a bunch of bad guys at your party all at one time.

>D&D is great

No it's not, it's awful.

Terrible mechanics, non existent balance, completely arbitrary rules for classes and weapons, convoluted rules and unnecessary maths among others are all things D&D is guilty of.

As a system it doesn't encourage good DM-ing or good roleplay, it's tedious in the extreme and I do not understand the levels of Stockholm syndrome that people must be suffering to call this tripe "great".

The D&D apologists on Veeky Forums always remind of those idiots who insist that RISK is the best boardgame ever. RISK is dog shit and by raving on about how good it is you only succeed in outing yourself as someone who has zero experience of other boardgames because if you did you would have never made that statement to begin with.

>This jock shit is offensive.
seriously dude

>tries to form an argument
>can only talk about RISK

Show us on the doll where Gygax touched you.

>Gygax
More like wotc and hasbro

It did reveal a lot didn't it.

5E is the least bully-worthy edition, no worries.

>loses risk
>"oh man this game is shit"

>Literally a unsupported opinion and forcing it down a newbie's throat
Cancer

Pretty sure you can only level once per session

For level 1? Here: these are called "Bait & Tackle" all of these are plots that scale to any level for any group, and can be used quickly and easily. Sorry for the quality, but i never used a scanner before making these.

No, you can level as often as the players are willing to level.

>>loses risk
>>"oh man this game is shit"

...