Veeky Forums pet peeves

I've never told an untrue story on Veeky Forums.

No one ever believed them, so I've given up entirely.

I actually had to switch from raw XP to a milestone system because of my players doing this exact thing.

>people treated like shit and still going to game night

Pisses me off the most because I'm the DM so I put a ton of work into each weekend and having people flake is a huge insult that they never even consider.

>I want to sell one of my race/class features for something else to make something like a shield wizard

sigh

>shield wizard
it really is a cool concept to be fair

All my stories are fake, and only loosely based on real experiences and people.

There hasn't been a screencap thread in the last six years that hasn't had at least one of my stories posted in it, and people rarely question their authenticity. I think this might be a case where since I know that it's fake, I put effort into maintaining the suspension of disbelief, but because you know your tales are true, you don't bother making them believable.

yeah but hes gonna get sick of it fast

>Tfw you originally wrote Sir Bearington and people to this day think you aren't chock full of shit

Metathreads.

Single line of greentext threads.

Ebin threads.

>people that won't stop gushing about their favorite system even though you've made it clear you have no desire to play it.

>Hey, have you played Strike! yet?
>You want a mech game? Strike!
>High-flying wuxia game? Strike!
>A slow-burn game of political intrigue? STRIIIIIIII-

Every fucking time.

I always use the milestone system. XP gets hard to keep track of, and games go a lot quicker when I can pick where my players level up.

Makes the same character every single game, regardless of setting appropriateness.

I actually like exp. I refuse to give uneven xp when everybody is present though, some types might rage at that.

People that make brooding edgelords that have no reason whatsoever to be with the party in the first place.

People that play evil characters that backstab the party.

>implying you're not

The story doesn't make sense. The extreme penalties for the disguise, even under a lenient DM, would still make it so that a casual onlooker would be able to easily see through it. And, even with an extremely lenient DM who ignored all the penalties, every person who saw the character would be offered a chance at opposed rolls, which would make the failure of the disguise commonplace.

Basically, it's a bad version of Chickenboo, but with a bear because lol internet.

>said character is literally himself but "cooler" and/or edgier

>people who insist of playing a race/class not from the region you're running the game in

>tfw grendel is canon in dark heresy

I once rolled 20 and ever since I post on Veeky Forums despite never playing tabletop games (Other than chess)

Turbo wizards who are not content with wielding the power cosmic, but have to display that they wield the power cosmic.
I was literally in a campaign where a necromancer revived a Huge weasel (forget which template was used, but you get the idea) as his pet which would pull a cart and that he could ride into battle.
And he dragged this thing through every village and town right by peasants.

I mean, don't get me wrong. I actually have no issue with Wizards who play their class in a way that wouldn't inspire the local populace to call in the king's army or burn the character at the stake, but some characters and DMs treat Wizards as if they'd exist in Looney Tunes world where no one's uncomfortable around this shit.

nice digits

If you are going to award xp per session, what's the point in xp anyway?

The amount of generals this board has. I know it's not as fast as /v/ so new threads don't get bumped off the board but this is a bit ridiculous and it has been for some time. I think we need a /tgg/ board like Veeky Forums.

The way my GM runs it is that we answer a brief questionnaire about what we did/didn't do during the session (such as whether we achieved a goal through might or guile, or touched upon a bond in an interesting way), so while it's effectively XP per session, it varies depending on what we did.

For example, the last few sessions we've been in a Wizard's Tower, going through his various defences and solving puzzles. Well, attempting to solve them. We haven't actually fully succeeded at any of them so far, but we've bungled our way through regardless. So while we have been achieving goals, so to speak, we haven't been getting extra XP for actually doing them in a way that actual, competent adventurers would.

>we finally get rid of quests
>'time to complain about generals!'

>we finally get rid of quests
>'time to complain about generals!'
Huh? What does that mean?

There's a flavor of shitposter that won't be satisfied until the board is nothing but 40k memes.

40k is a disease, like chickenpox. Every fa/tg/uy gets it and then for however long it takes him to recover (some never do) he's incapable of talking or thinking about anything except 40k.

The terminal phase he changes his name to something Russian and replaces all his avatars on steam and forums and shit with dudes in gas masks, and that's when you know it's time to put him down.

Ok.me and my friends played a low fantasy dnd game for the last five years and want to play some fuking power characters.Fantasy,Sci Fi and any thing that can be fun for a few games.

what does this post mean

what are you even talking about?

>all people know of dnd is greentext stories from Veeky Forums that have circulated on reddit

>playing SWN
>be level 3 party with little combat ability
>lose a warrior on a job
>go back to criminal guy in strip club from whom we got job
>told us we make what we can get out of the debtor
>we only got a deed to his gallery which he fucking takes from us
>joker character pours a bag of bloody teeth on table
>asks that we get paid 1000 per tooth, refrencing crim. mans exact wording of job
> criminal grudgingly agrees and says we'll get paid no more than that
>robot party member (with NO COMBAT SKILLS) puts gun to guys head
>rages and says we need to make some actual money on this
>doesn't bother to notice that we're surrounded by this guys allies
>doesn't roll perception to see how many armed guards in strip club
>totally forgets that this is a police state and that fifty soldiers will show up to a noise complaint
>we have to all yell at him to retract that action
>DM allows
>moral of the story:

WHY DO PLAYERS THINK THEY ARE INVINCIBLE?

Old Man Henderson is worse, and IIRC, also got a shoutout in a supplement.

Mildly amusing story, if you like assholes getting revenge on idiots.

But the number of people that think it was true, and that both the rules and actual Mythos lets actually kill Great Old Ones because of "summoning sickness"... it's ridiculous.

He was just saying he was, you dumb fuck. lrn2read

Because some people don't want to roleplay, they just want the power trip they don't have in real life.

Sounds like he's been playing a low powerlevel fantasy game and wants to leave low powerlevels behind and have an epic campaign - less WHFRP and more Exalted.

>dungeon world

That's my problem right now. GM is so against killing PC's that I've started to do stupid shit that would most certainly cause my death to show him how absured he is being.

Favorite think i've done? One man assult on a bandit camp. Conviniently I lived.

see, that's fine, but when you're a robot that is about as bullet resistant as tissue paper, why would you choose to put yourself and the entire party in danger just for barely enough money to buy a junker ship?

Bloody idiots they are.

>Plenty of time to escape before green dragon shows up
>Players stay anyways
>"And what have you to offer as tribute?"
>"Nothing, I guess."
>Player gives cocky smile
>Dragon eats player
>Other player: "Your early sessions are way too hard. You need to give us more time to get in the swing of things. We keep dying early."

>you romance the dragon

This actually does seem to happen more than it should. Not spontaneously with stupid diplomacy checks though.

>Early Sessions
>Dragon
How early exactly?

I mean no offence, but he's kind of right.
First you should throw a cocky noble brat with some mercenaries their way. Some one or something they can actually survive if they decide to be asshats.
If they're the kind of players that will act ass hats hand their ass to them on a silver platter, and have that noble brat or whatever have them beat and take half their stuff, thinking this will "send a message".
If that doesn't learn them, you're in the green.

>rainbow coalition party where every character is a different super rare race

I hate that as a player. You feel less like a hero and more like a circus

> Every time DM is trying to establish a ridiculously powerful and influensive lord/merchant prince, but we refuse to take them seriously, because they are so fucking boring. Just like the last merchant prince, who was exactly the same.
> When DM is so oddly jaded, that he goes out of the way to paint the party as unwashed murderhobos, who get no respect. Yes, even the paladin in shining armor. In fact, especially the paladin.
> Secret societies and cults that are barely secret.

Oh my.

I just got into 40K and am legitimately learning Russian. Please help me.

>tell a true story on Veeky Forums
>it even happened at a tabletop, not online
>nobody believes me

Feels bad man.

Lmao don't worry, it's all hyperbole. 40k is a good setting and Russian is a good language.

Both of these are alright if there's a reason for it. The question is, "Why is this rare whatever in this region at this moment?" If the answer can be tied back into the central plot, who gives a shit.

>open Veeky Forums
>10 of the top 20 threads are quests
>close Veeky Forums

Actually that doesnt happen anymore :^)

>post my quest on there like i'm supposed to
>guy berates me for not doing it on Veeky Forums until they force me off

kill me

If he wants unwashed murderhobos, give him unwashed murderhobos. If he tries to make the paladin fall, get the paladin to take the fall and go full antipaladin. If he suddenly doesnt like you murdering everyone even slightly negative towards you, or if he throws super-special-snowflake DMPCs at you, ask him "Is this not what you wanted from us?"

Disclaimer: I am a terrible person and this is terrible advice, you should probably disregard it.

Yes, I am complaining about generals and no, I'm not "shitposting."

80% of the catalog is nothing but generals just like the quest threads were. They're both a nuisance.

But there's a lot of useful discussion that goes on in the generals. What would they even get replaced with if they were banned?

That Guy threads?

Just run it there. For Fuchs sake they made the board just for that.

Let that other ass enjoy his salt.

Players who ALWAYS antagonize NPC's and other players to make themselves the center of attention.

>Excuse me Commissar threads as far as the eye can see

I am, no worries. Just, jesus fuck, people are being stupid over this split.

>we get another fucking 'best primarch/worst primarch/etc' thread every fucking week

Players who look down on others for trying to figure out who could beat who, then end the arguments with something like "My character is better, anyway."

>playing with d20s

Martians, such gearheads...

>spitting on dice

>40k memes being so bad that star wars memes seem dank by comparison

My pet peeve is when my girlfriend roleplays out going to the shopkeeper, because she knows how to press all my buttons and seduce me.

I still haven't forgiven her for that time she made me cum under the table with her foot. She's lucky she pulled that stunt a week before we were moving out of state.

Just accept that nothing on the internet ever happened, take in the stories with a pinch of salt, and enjoy yourself without having to constantly bitch about things never happening.

My pet peeve is everything that Veeky Forums represents.

>Players are the best and it's always DMs that are shit
>"A DM who doesn't let me win is That DM"
>Sandbox campaigns are fun
>Sandbox campaigns run by complete improv are literally the only way to play, everything else is "railroading" and if you're not going to run a plot-free sandbox world that the players create as they play, you should just go write a book.
>We can't be mean to anyone or expect them to do things on their own, that might scare them away and then they won't be a part of our hobby!

Definition of Mary Sue, right there. Mary Sue is defined as a self-insert even if the other qualifying criteria are up for debate.

Veeky Forums generals seem a bit better by comparison, generals seem to serve a pretty good purpose for containment.

Still, I've seen a lot of posted who clearly have filtered generals, but then create threads about questions they have for games that already have active generals.

>the one rollplayer min max fag that follows a step by step gamebreaking guide to some super niche chain whip/charge build
>meanwhile the other members of the group have ranks in shit like perform and knowledge: composing literature

Shit is hard to balance for in combat, yo.

Why are generals a bad thing?

>Always make characters at a game session before every thing starts.
>Take the sheets in a folder, put it in your books.
>These are now the characters they have to use.
Or the more adult way is to
>don't play with dicks
>tell them no redo it.

>people who do this because they're paying more attention to their "build," than the game in question.
Jesus fuck, just go roll on a grid with some minis by yourself. You might as well, save us all the agony of your experience.

There not, it keeps shit in one place at a time.
Though generals in my experience tend to be a bunch of waifuing and meme jokes on the system.

He's lulling you into a false sense of security. A total party kill encounter is just around the corner.

I think you're missing the bit where they had plenty of time to leave.

I have a feeling that if this was early, it was supposed to be a villain-establishing moment. Run in fear from the Green, maybe hear him roaring his threats as you escape or fight a few of his cronies to get out because he doesn't want to give chase.

But if you're staying right there, early enough that it being a villain-establishing moment is a legitimate possibility, then you should probably only blame yourself.

Granted, I'm not the dude who posted the story. This is just how I interpreted it.

It's like you don't enjoy having a stranger in a strange land character on the team. They're a great thing, if you make sure to point out the odd situation.

The problem here, assuming you aren't an assblasted user who simply hates the story like myself and wants to decrease the popularity by insisting that it's fake, that even IF the story originally was fake, there's the fact that the story has spawned so many people who try to recreate it that shoots a hole in the logic of you greentexting "I can't believe people believe it", implying it was incredulous in the first place.

I have played with every stereotype under the sun.

I have played with an actual rules lawyer who, upon failing to get a second attack with a knife in his off hand after making an attack with a two-handed greatsword and dropping it, thereby making both hands "light" for the attack, and when I dead-pan told him "no", stopped the session to call up Wizards of the Coast for a ruling.

I've had an autistic kid who made his character a tiefling and then described him, verbaitum, as "He looks exactly like Charizard. Except human", and then proceeded to ignore all of the rules we told him, while trying to utilize fly and fireblast and then getting mad when they didn't get a super effective.

I played with a Chaotic Neutral Drow Rogue who stole from the party and then said "it's just how my character would act!" moments before getting gored to death by the party and a peryton.

I played with a kender.

Get over yourself.

Allow me to elaborate, I don't mind people picking exotic races if they have a good backstory reason to do so. What really bothers me is when someone picks a race BECAUSE it's not from that reason and nothing else. I've seen it happen so many times, the guy picks drow in a kingdom that's never even met elves before and makes the entire campaign about him and his special snowflake race in a foreign land, trying his best to make every session about him

What did WotC say?

I also want to hear more about the Charizard kid. That sounds gold.

A party that doesn't know what they're doing is hard to balance for anyways because their potency is going to end up all over the fucking place. God fucking help you if someone picks Druid because bears look cool.

Not everyone on Veeky Forums thinks like this

>Players are the best and it's always DMs that are shit
Yeah, this is seen an unfortunate amount.

>"A DM who doesn't let me win is That DM"
I honestly don't see this happen more often than not. Veeky Forums is more likely to blame a GM if the story is told from a neutral perspective, but it's my experience that if it's told from the perspective of what's usually That Guy, the board will call him out as That Guy.

>Sandbox campaigns are fun
I see the exact opposite opinion posted way more often.

>Sandbox campaigns are improv, etc.
I've also seen this not nearly as well-held any more. Most of the posts I've seen tend to support avoiding railroading while also recognizing that most groups just cannot be left to their own devices. A plan must be in place, it's just railroading to TELL THEM it's your plan instead of letting them think they came up with the ideas themselves.

>We can't be mean
Where the fuck have you seen this? Veeky Forums's actually been taking a more Right-leaning bend in regards to people just needing to buck the fuck up as of the past couple years.

I take it the rules lawyer wasn't invited to the next session. I've seen some shit but this is beyond anything I've experienced from anyone in a traditional game.

Jesus Christ, what did WotC tell him?

>Where the fuck have you seen this?

I dunno, maybe every single fucking "lol guys im new how do i play d&d?" thread we have at least once a day, where if you give them the basic fucking answer of HOLY SHIT FUCKING GOOGLE IT, Veeky Forums will post a fucking page-long diatribe about how "that's rude, you don't have to be a douche to someone asking a question", and then they'll proceed to try as hard as possible to explain literally every facet of information that could have been gained by just googling the shitty question, because they need to make sure that the person isn't "scared away" from the hobby because someone didn't suck their dick.