>Be DM >Be typical session playing dnd 5e >PCs in local tavern >half-deva PC is chatting up the barmaid >not even 3 sentences in he demands she suck his dick >Rolls for it >nat 20 >tfw my friend made me act out sucking his dick
Because you let them. You have the right to set constraints to what they can do if there are things uncomfortable for you.
Blake Collins
I think you just want to suck your friend's dick, OP
Liam Peterson
Can I get my dick sucked?
Jeremiah Flores
Your such a slut user, holy shit.
Landon Morgan
Rolled 9 (1d20)
Suck my dick.
Bentley Martin
Rolled 10 (1d20)
Puff my pecker.
Gavin Watson
Rolled 9 (1d20)
Gargle my nuts.
Evan Howard
Slut
Chase Barnes
Rolled 16 (1d20)
Deepthroat my chode
Daniel Nguyen
Rolled 18 (1d20)
Slob my knob.
Charles Bailey
Rolled 3 (1d20)
Hold my hand and whisper sweet things to me.
Daniel Lewis
Rolled 6 (1d20)
Sit next to me and inch closer until we're should to shoulder.
Dylan Evans
>my friend made me act out sucking his dick >made me
Julian Ward
Rolled 6 (1d20)
Leave now and never come back.
Grayson Lee
>Why must they do this to me.
Because you like it.
Brody Davis
>dat low poster count
Blake Baker
I prefer to use qualified/limited auto success/failure on a 1/20, and their degree of success still depends on what DC i think it is and their overall score: A barmaid is probably hit on often, the PC is half angel and presumably attractive, but Id still put that DC over thirty, so what I'd do is have the barmaid feel a strong "yes oh glorious one I'd love to blow you" urge, but then unless the PC made another great role, and or more sensible offer of a rendezvous in private she would refuse, albeit secretly wishing she had blown him right then and there.
Alexander Miller
>'natural 20 is auto-success for things other than attack rolls and saving throws' meme
You make me sad.
Liam Hughes
You sick bastard
Josiah Baker
Rolled 14 (1d20)
Call your friend and tell him that you liked.
Luke Stewart
Rolled 9 (1d20)
get on those knobby knees and wrap your cheeto-stained lips around my four inch cock you fat fuck
Angel Wright
Rolled 17 (1d20)
Fucking slave, get your ass back here
Mason Nguyen
You only rolled a 3, so you failed and OP has to suck your dick.
Luis Fisher
>shitty homebrew race >shitty house rule skill crits You alone asked for this.
Juan Russell
it's more fun
Gavin Richardson
Rolled 1 (1d20)
gimme a kiss
John Thomas
[gets slapped by the barmaid and thrown out of the bar]
Connor Morris
literally my first time rolling on Veeky Forums i want to die
Jack King
Lesson learned: don't let Nat 20s make stupid shit happen
Stand up to players when you have to and don't be a cuck, otherwise this shit will get worse
Jace Ross
Seriously you guys are not getting a SINGLE 20?
Brandon Ross
Rolled 4 (1d20)
Suck my penor.
Angel Adams
Jesus christ, you guys suck harder than OP did. Please, people, roll ONE SINGLE 20!!!
John Campbell
Pretty much this.
Josiah Martinez
t. lolrandumb
Aaron Diaz
Bestow upon me a smooch
Oliver Reed
Rolled 5 (1d20)
Please gain some self-respect and either tell him to stop or just suck his dick in real life.
Brayden Martin
Rolled 15 (1d20)
Suck my dick, faggot.
Justin Hall
Nope, try again, sir. We only serve 20s here, you can take that limp 15 of yours somewhere else.
Angel Flores
Hold my hand you slut
Jordan Ramirez
And today Veeky Forums has failed to roll a single twenty and went home with his dick unsucked by OP.
Nicholas Nguyen
Rolled 11 (1d20)
Oh well. Guess I'll just pack up my dice and go, then... Oops! Dropped one. What's it say, user?
What about this, eh? I braught my special lucky dice
Parker Peterson
I kek'd
Still, no fellatio was acquired.
Mason Watson
Rolled 13 (1d20)
This never happened, leave Veeky Forums forever
After gobbling my knob
Josiah Parker
>this never happened Your fear of sexual impotency is showing.
Joseph Brown
18ish atempts, not a single 20. You suck at dice, Veeky Forums.
Wyatt Rivera
>>Rolls for it >>nat 20 What DC was the roll against? What was his modifier? If the barmaid had any fucking self esteem like you seem to lack, then even a twentyshouldn't be enough.
Or, on top of having literally no self esteem what so ever, you also DON'T KNOW THE FUCKING RULES!
Hudson Gonzalez
First time in Veeky Forums history that the OP, in fact, is not a fag.
Lucas Cox
You get 20 hungry looks aimed at your penis and no succ, try again
Brayden Gonzalez
Rolled 8, 5 + 8 = 21 (2d20 + 8)
Mod of 5 with +3 proficiency
Daniel Torres
finger my asshole
Dominic Scott
You can't crit a skill chick or saving throw
Ian Jenkins
Rolled 4 (1d20)
You faggots are terrible at dice.
Robert Clark
Rolled 2 (1d20)
You're all a bunch of idiots. Stand back.
Liam Howard
Rolled 12 (1d20)
I want to fail too!
Lincoln Bennett
This is a black day for Veeky Forums ladies and gents. Not only are we not getting our knobs slobbed, the dice have turned against us as well.
I use my cyclops helm to get a 20. On your knees wench.
Jaxon Nelson
Rolled 17 (1d20)
>OP posts about having to uncomfortably describe a blowjob >entire thread devolves to people trying to roll a nat 20 for him to do it to them
Never change, Veeky Forums
Colton Clark
Rolled 13 (1d20)
More dicks join the fray. OP, you have to service them all.
Adam Evans
Rolled 9 (1d20)
Worship the wiener, OP.
Jaxon Perez
>only two of them actually succeed, and only by rolling 25 at once It's like throwing a bucket full of hot dogs at someone's face: One of them has to end up in their mouth.
>be DM >ERP sucking friend's dick instead of deciding that the barmaid was a level 20 paladin who made a purity vow, character's dick was crushed by falling rocks and highly improbable magic field fluctuations turned him into an asian grandma with tiny feet You just like to choke on cocks, OP.