Barbarians

>Conan clone
Conan wasn't even a barbarian, he was a high-strength rogue.

The barbarian used to be a lot more skillful before 3e.

He was a wild man so he's mostly a barbarian.

Conan THE BARBARIAN user. But you have a point, the OP has betrayed his ignorance, barbarians are not copies of Conan. If they were they would be cunning and sneaky as well as fighting machines. Basically if we were to put this in terms of Dnd Conan is a barbarian who put a few levels into rogue down the line.

I enjoy playing a barbarian noble

A fucker that uses many fancy words and is generaly quite cultured, though in a rough and brutal way, and is terrible while enraged or offended.

His sense of honour and such things is more primal and "barbaric"

Example: "it is honorable to send the head of envoy who presented an insulting offer back to his master in a box so you won't be a man who allows others to spit in his face" instead of "it is honorable to uphold the sacred custom of diplomatic immunity"

Also patronizing oral heroic poetry and stuff

Wearing lots of jewelery (high ranked barbarians like shinies as fuck, and not very subtle ones) drinking wine (because it's expensive and it's status symbols and barbarians have no negative stereotype of it as "womanly" drink), organising lavish feasts with roasted boars and flowing mead, drinking from the horns

You know, the jarl/thane stuff.

Is there any way to play a barbarian that isn't a naked idiot?

Like, what if I wanted my barbarian to come from a noble house and be trained in all sorts of noble combat but also be filled with unstoppable seething rage? So he's a perfect gentleman unless he's fighting dudes and then he goes HAM on em

Oh, I guess that is kind of what I'm talking about

If we put this in terms of D&D Conan is a fighter rogue dualclass. Just because he's called "The Barbarian" doesn't mean he automatically is one. I'm sure many people in fact and fiction alike have held symbolic or poetic titles that were not literal.

>Example: "it is honorable to send the head of envoy who presented an insulting offer back to his master in a box so you won't be a man who allows others to spit in his face" instead of "it is honorable to uphold the sacred custom of diplomatic immunity"

This is cartoonishly stupid

>drinking wine (because it's expensive and it's status symbols and barbarians have no negative stereotype of it as "womanly" drink)

Never in history has wine been perceived as a feminine drink other than in a select few contemporary cultures ("cultures" in a very loose way i.e. America). Additionally there is no intrinsic status ascribed to it either, because, just like today, there was dirt cheap wine and there was expensive wine.

Are you wilfully ignorant, or is that a product of your upbringing?

>open the barbarian's handbook
>a fist shoots out and punches you in the jaw

The D&D Barbarian was literally based on Conan. Mechanically it might not always be the best fit (let's be real: Conan's abilities are hardly capable of being put on a character sheet to begin with), but thematically the class was designed to allow players to create that kind of character.

Is it accurate, mechanically? Well, the rage is dead-on (Conan pretty commonly enters rages where he just goes batshit on people), and the distrust of magic is of course directly ripped from him. Some editions only allow Barbarians to wear light armor, which is another thing that's designed to evoke a certain kind of image (namely, the loincloth-clad wildman that Conan is in popular culture), whereas an actual Conan PC would have proficiency in just about every kind of weapon and armor around.

As a rule of thumb though, unless we want to start comparing his feats of strength and dexterity to try to determine what he multi-classed into to grab class skills or whatever, Barbarian is a pretty safe bet.

I once played a Barbarian who I fluffed as an untrained, uneducated farmhand who learned to fight as he went after his homestead was beset by bandits
I'd have him roll wisdom saves whenever he took a big hit, and if he failed he'd rage

there's a Rage mage prestige class in 3/3.5 but whether you consider it a barbarian that can sling spells or a mage who can go berserk is a matter of semantics

>mages

>dwarf barbarian
>MUH GREAT AXE XD
every time

youtu.be/nbTF0xEzHwA?t=10s

This is the sort if Barbarian I prefer.

Sadly all the art i have are of axe and sword barbarians, there needs to be more hammer barbs

It's a hologram

>Specifically how you've played them/
Play as someone from a completely different land that is totally foreign to the setting.
Make sure that npcs and other player characters get that he is a Foreigner and that he/she does things differently

Barbarians can be fancy too.

I played one as a dorf Herakles, except with bear pelt instead of lion, and strangers couldn't tell where the pelt ended and my beard/chest hair/hair coat began. It was such a thick layer of hairy beard that it prevented me from being bitten on the neck by snakes.

I had a tower shield just so I could snowboard with it.

how are those graphics from 2016, they look like a ps3 game at best

The cheap way? In 3.5...

1st level wizard*

Lost Tradition feat -> STR as casting stat

Take some levels in barbarian.

*Or any caster. If you want to optimize this you'd probably use alternative class rules and PrCs later on.

>This is cartoonishly stupid

Care to elaborate?

>Never in history has wine been perceived as a feminine drink other than in a select few contemporary cultures ("cultures" in a very loose way i.e. America).

But we're talking about fantasy. And many fantasy authors and MOST gamers incorporate modern views into their worlds. So when playing RPGs wine usually is considered "drink of women, elves and effeminate nobles". I'm actually trying to fight with this stereotype by playing barbarian that way.

>Additionally there is no intrinsic status ascribed to it either, because, just like today, there was dirt cheap wine and there was expensive wine.

That's true in the region where grapes grow. In cold north where barbarians hail from, not really.

>Example: "it is honorable to send the head of envoy who presented an insulting offer back to his master in a box so you won't be a man who allows others to spit in his face" instead of "it is honorable to uphold the sacred custom of diplomatic immunity"
You think murdering a messenger is "honorable"? Congratulations, you will now never receive messages again, you will lose awareness of everything going on in your land, and consequently your enemies and rivals are circling like vultures YOU IDIOT.

Starting my first 5e campaign this friday, playing a high elf barbarian who is part of a monastic order who belief entropy or the only universal constant. Basically they view rage filled choatic bloodshed as both a religious devotion and a high art.

Plan on playing his as kind of a hyperviolent Kaine from Kung Fu.

I had a half-orc barbarian who was convinced he was a squishy wizard. He would try to cast spells, get pissed off when it didn't work, berserk, then after seeing the results of his carnage, he'd assume it was due to his powerful magics.

He also was raised by his orcish mom and convinced that he was a prince, and the emperor was his father. But he had to hide his noble lineage, lest assassins stab his squishy wizard body in his sleep.

I'm building terrain and painting miniatures for a Glorantha game, which is for the most part nominally "bronze age".

Iron exists, but it's explicitly magical, expensive, and the providence of a handful of advanced cultures and those who trade or raid them.

I've scratch built a celtic style roundhouse for a Ralian Orlanthi dwelling, which will bt my PC's homestead, and I've bought some Copplestone Cavemen to use as Telmori "Wolf People", who compared to the vaguely indo-european tribal Orlanthi are more like primitive stone-age hunter-gatherers with animal totems.

My starter scenario will be sheep thieving neighbours attack the stead, and if they PC's don't catch them in time they're intercepted by Telmori who kill them and the sheep, and take the sheep off to be eaten, as Telmori do not keep herd animals, only wolves.

Depending on the speed of their pursuit they may walk into a three-way fight or catch their pesky neighbours only to be ambushed my Telmori themselves.

And unbeknownst to them, the local Telmori are lead by a powerful shapeshifting warrior-shaman, and their sheep thieving neighbours are the three sons a local witch.

These are painted examples of the Copplestone Cavemen I got, though I'mma paint mine up swarthier with dark hair and eyes, and Beast Rune tattoos.

Friend is a barbarian
>Red Teifling
>Stupid af
>Clan have great orgy feast after hunting owlbears
>Warlord poop on tribe while away
>Team up with pleb adventurers (party) to make ends meet
>name is miphisto
> miphisted a lot of whores early on
> contracted to get wizard tower magic McGuffey
> shit_happens.png
> find magical battle axe
> Miphisto takes it and gets mind fucked by it, attuned though
> find out it's the war gods axe
> find out it's vampiric
> find out has to slaughter forest life daily

Htw he has to miphist everything now

>you will lose awareness of everything going on in your land
like I execute my messenger who brings news and not the foreign one who brings insults (or offers/demands that are insults for me).

Notion that envoys are untouchable wasn't universal in history. Much of their immunity was derrived not from any code of honour but the power of country/ruler who backed them. It was dependent of time and culture, and on the "moral" level only crystallised (at least in Eurpe) with christian chivalric code (Although some seeds were sown earlier, but among "civillised" people.

There are many cases, even among "civilized" people, where messengers bringing threats and insults were killed or mistreated, it isn't anything uncommon.

It might not always be the best thing to do, as of course it will drive the envoys backer mad, maybe his allies too, maybe provoke war with a stronger party, but it isn't also best thing to do to take the duel challenge from the man twice as strong as you. You will almost inevitably lose, you might get maimed or killed. Yet that's also considered "honorable" thing to do.

And as barbarian cultures
>value honour
>their morality isn't affected by the needs of civillisation, strentgh and personal dignity is stressed very seriously instead

then

>retaliation for insults in form of punishing the insulting party (envoy or not) is for them morally right, honorable thing to do
>it is more important to do the right thing, than do the most beneficient thing

And on the other hand, rulers and envoys amng such cultures would know well this is the case so they would behave themself. Unless they really think the man who they are contacting is a weakling who will chose peace over honour. And that adds another unspoken, heavy insult on top of every other.

That's how I see it.

I wanna be her waifu

Survival proficiency?

Wouldn't shamans just be druids?

I am currently playing a barbarian/cleric multiclass, where the barbarian has been chosen by his to do a holy quest. Being from an isolated tribe, he has no concept of how magic works, so spells just burst out of him at both apropriate and inapropriate moments.

The rest of the party are city dwelllers, so he is often confused by civilised inventions (such as advanced plumbing) and magic. However he is not stupid (12 int/wis), he just lacks education, so whenever the party ventures in nature he really shines with his practical knowledge of plants, animals and ecology.

Visually he is a Mongolian Conan clone.

That's cool!

I went with a barb/bard multiclass, dorf frontliner that simply has a fantastic and commanding voice. Loves himself some warcries.

>McGuffey
I believe you mean MacGuffin/McGuffin/maguffin.

I want to make a 5e character whose backstory is that he was raised from the age of five or six by some animals in the jungle (don't know what species yet). So he speaks common, but it's broken. He's very intelligent, but mostly knows about nature, survival, setting traps, making his own spears, and so on, most of which he figured out on his own.

Barbarian a good choice? Barbarian + something else multiclass?

How about splashing in ranger, to get an animal companion/mother-figure?

Awesome, thanks!