Human x Elf relationships are the most common interracial relationships

The Norse did it. Elves fed Giants, Gods, and Humans. Many kings were said to be descended from elves.

Tolkien took it from there.

*wed

We don't really know what Ljósálfar looked like though, other than being particularly white skinned.

Because as the years go on and nothing around them seems to change, the desire for excitement and novelty builds up until a rash decision is made, commemorated by inexperienced copulation and a gestation period longer than her new flame's lifespan and centuries of single motherhood to look forward to.

This is the real reason every half-elf is a moody fuck.

>bmw's and shit don't exist in middle earth.
Because it was always about bmws, right? Hypergamy is a survival mechanism. The man with the most resources is the most likely to provide for offspring and ensure they survive. Whether this wealth is expressed through BMWs, thoroughbred horses or even a roomy cave with plenty of mammoth meat does not matter.

Because it's socially acceptable to fuck a loli if she's 30 years old.

So if an elf snaps and blows a room full of humans, does she get arrested for elven statutory?

>Implying I didn't end up married to my high school teacher when I legally came of age

We'd had a kid before then even.

They were regularly described as beautiful, though this was also with the connotation of masculinity meaning beauty,

Take the fedora off, Francis

That's kinda hot, I wish it were true

in a world without shopping malls and fast food, restaurants or catering, you need to create everything with your hands. Men are the ones in high demand during these times because women don't want to do any of that themselves. Men are the ones who get to decide who they wind up with, the only exception being if the woman is incredibly good looking.

Humans are the ones taking on the fantasies, and so the fantasies are generally from the human perspective. Humans would like a wise, intelligent, understanding, eternally sexy partner who is basically the ideal of human characteristics. If this leans a bit towards men's tastes, that's no doubt because men dominated the fantasy genre for such a long time.

You'll notice that a lot of women writing fantasy tend not to use elves and dwarves as much, more preferring humans. Or, more recently, vampires/werewolves.

>Or, more recently, vampires/werewolves.
If banning women from fantasy means eliminating this shitty subgenre, I'm all for it.

>Humans would like a wise, intelligent, understanding, eternally sexy partner who is basically the ideal of human characteristics
fantasy involving romance is for women and virgins. true men seek vengeance, steel, and retribution.

>My genki brown elf tomboy christmas cake brown childhood friend has stolen my heart
>I will have retribution for this theft most vile by forcing her to taste my blade
>And by my blade, I mean my dick
Sounds manly enough

>half elves being sorta genetically flawed lunatics

This is something i actually really like.

I can only think of one or two universes that do it though.

...might be just people getting buttmad at all the shitty half-elf role players.

I don't see why they should be genetically flawed lunatics. Sterile maybe, but not lunatics.

>Mixing humans and monsters together.
>non expecting to get a monster.

One of the things I found genuinely interesting and not entirely hysterical in the Book of Erotic Fantasy was how it talked about the sexual development of half-elves. If raised among elves they mature too fast, if among humans too slow. Among humans you have a pale-faced half-elf building sand castles while his peers are arguing over who has the best tits. Among elves you have a wispy-bearded half-elf having awkward incidents with doll-playing elf children.

Adds to their sense of alienation, inability to fit in.

...hmm. Is BvS Imperium propaganda? Mixing together human and basically Space Marine and getting a horrendous monster due to the heretical nature of the act?

Human x elf shit is the worst.
Fuck Tolkien for popularizing that shit. Elves are better as magical, unknowable fey creatures, no as just pointy eared humans with some magical talents.

I'm inclined to agree, and if you want to make them pointy eared humans then don't make them live for the better part of a century. A lifespan of 200 years is around the point where they start becoming unrelatable.

...might not want to make them pointy-eared humans who live for about two centuries. Those are pretty much Vulcans.

I'm not sure where I should ask this, so I'll try here: I've been building a basic table top system with 20sided dies being the method of calculating damage; with that in mind, how much health should I give common enemies?

...nothing you've described gives us what we need to tell you how much health.

If it's about calculations it's basically: roll a 1 and deal 1 damage, roll a 20 you deal 20.

Someone got rejected...

Speaking as a low-born human coming from the backwoods of the frontier, yeah I like Elves. They're usually running around half naked, are well endowed, and very loose when it comes to getting a good fuck. But that's it. They sleep with every goddamn thing that moves to the point where those filthy mongreloids are a literal ethic group. That's before we get into the Orcs, the supposed "corrupted Elves" and their literal spawning pits.

Yeah, the evil corrupted Elves have little designated areas where they have massive orgies all day and night. Yes Elves are for fun, they're massive sluts and we're lying if we say otherwise. Now Dwarves on the other hand, those are real women. They will stand by your side even when the going gets tough, they back you up in a fight, they're loyal partners who'll stay faithful to you until you part. If you wanna bone a non-human, go Dorf.

Of course some of the Sidhe and Yokai make for... Interesting relationships. Really research your shit (this cannot be stressed enough) before you jump in bed with one of those though.

>B-But elves are sexy humans!!
Because this trope is such a fucking pile of bullshit. I understand most of the fantasy is aimed at compulsive teenage masturbators, but it doesn't make it better.
I love when Elves look weird and alien, you know, like a proper different kind of species - tall, slender, with long faces and bulging eyes.
But today they are nothing more that a bunch of eternal fucktoys.

>Yokai
Some are literally made for waifing

But user, that's a gumiho, not a kitsune.

Clearly the answer is to raise them among elves until puberty and then ship them off to the humans

...

>Seriously, how can elves see humans as anything other than pets, let alone viable romantic partners?

Same way "modern liberals" can see negroes.

Nice one, Cletus.

You're so full of shit it's even funny

Warhammer Elves are properly creepy.

Wish fulfilment. Most of the time it's implied that's human male x female elf, because most here are sexual deprived males that indulge in self-insert power fantasies Then it doesn't even need to make sense that those female elves find humans attractive. Most of them must look like 2/20 for elven male standards, that die before they even get real shit done, mostly shite at magic and with the cultural and intellectual prowess of two goblins.
>B-but user, most of the male elves are faggots and I'm so maaaanly and huuumanly!
Which is also pretty much a Veeky Forums thing.
>B-but all their female elves are sloooooots!
Another Veeky Forums thing. And japanese porn. This makes the least sense, considering that in some settings they are a dying or fading race. Or if not, then they have a stable population, but humans are still the most populous race. If all the elf girls would be such whores, half-elves should have overtaken already.

All this also implies that elves have a near identical sexuality to humans. Which is boring and shit, because elves that are basically humans with pointy ears are the worst elves. It also reduces them to one-dimensional waifus, not a fleshed out race with interesting characters and cultures, but only something that makes the human in fantasy lands and the human before the screen feel better about himself.

I remember dating a Elf. I remember coming back home from a long voyage with my fellow Vikings and finding her in bed with Jamal Tyrone, the slave I captured in Unga Bunga Land. Needless to say I threw her out, sacrificed the thrall to ol' One Eye and forgot about her in a week. Shacked up with a weird Cat Spirit from Nippon a few years later. Haven't been happier since.

It's true, though.

So Elves are all bitchy sex-starved Tumblr feminists. Yeah, I'm still sticking with Dwarven wenches.

>click for shiggles
>find scholarly analysis of cartoon shipping by gamma permavirgins on Veeky Forums

Too dressed up there.

I think it would be creepier to add things like an extra finger joint, or flexible pads instead of toes, smaller teeth, clammy skin, stiff hair and black sclera.

Or just no eyebrows, but a heavy occipatal ridge that wrinkles when it moves.

Has summer already started?

I don't see how rail-thin knife-eared alien-eyed magic abominations with smug superiority complexes taking a higher cognitive importance than food can be considered sexy.

user, what you're missing in your dealings with Elven sexuality and standards is that they're generally extremely long lived.

That means at some point, it's quite possible they're going to dick a human for the novelty if nothing else. You can quickly get bored with a trait if you're constantly exposed to it (Nice as a quality is actually a really good thing in a partner, but the fact is that most people are fairly nice so it's not really attractive. So a lot of people end up dating someone who isn't Nice but actually has some other rarer quality that they're interested in.) So maybe you have an Elf woman dating a guy that's 2/10 for looks but is hilarious, or is hairy but also strong and surprisingly gentle with hands that could break her in two. Or an artist who is a moody bitch but completely devoted to her and treats her as his muse and his paintings of her show her in a way that makes her feel like an actual goddess.

As for half-elfs overtaking them, you simply rely on biology to have things like different PH balance of elf vaginas killing most of the sperm, or they don't go into estrus the same way human women do preparing for pregnancy. Maybe their fertile period is only for a brief time of the year for instance. Hell, maybe they're sluts with humans because of this, since sex with another elf means that they're going to have a much higher risk of pregnancy and then be responsible for a child that's going to be around for a hella long time.

There are plenty of possible reasonable explanations you can come up with that preserves them as alien and doesn't go full HFY.

Finally, in the case of PCs banging elves, they're PCs. They're explicitly created to be more than the average person, exceptional in some way represented by their class levels. So they get elf poon.

구미호 are essentially Kitsune you dumb western fuck, same base legend slightly different in different cultures. 구미호 eat you, is that waifu?

This is more to your liking?

You raise some good points that probably never happened in established settings and also probably were never of concern for the average reader of an elf-doujin.

Not guy you ask, but Fuck that is properly hideous.

Eldar are aliens after all.

>scottish elves

So Elves are western European women... Which means Elven men are the greatest of cuckolds. Which really puts the perspective of the great Orc migration and their huge exploding population into perspective. No wonder why Orkish spawning pits exist, those hos are pumping out Orklets like pez dispensers! Jeez guys, get a handle on your women sheesh.

That's what I'm talking about.

Nigga, if you're looking for quality in porn than your priorities are skewed.

But that doesn't mean you can't find it even there. It's just that people on this site probably just search for whatever is free and easy to flip through to the sexy bits instead of reading a good story WITH sexy parts.

But most established settings don't have a large number of half-elves, or interracial relationships and so it's uncommon when it's actually encountered and usually plot relevant in some way, and occurring between either people of the upper class who have the social mobility to first have the opportunity to interact with Elves and second the position to flout the standard morals and mores of society.

Or outcasts and misanthropes on the bottom rung of society who don't have commitments or investments in societies opinion of them and so can have non-standard relationships.

I see that you don't know that Sex Tourism is a big thing these days for Western European women.

And that your comparison is pretty bad because the attraction to novelty only works if it's actually novel. So it's going to happen among the upper classes of Orcs who have adopted Elven culture although they might revert back to their traditional Orcish stances when convenient.

Most Elven women would be apalled at hooking up with the regular orcs when they're exposed to them regularly, but if they were just traveling there for a week or if they found a wandering Orc that they knew wouldn't stick around . . . .

And also you forgot that the likelihood of not getting pregnant is a big point in favour of the casual sex as well.

Your shitty Europe analogy kind of fails because the actual races aren't separate enough to nearly the same degree as Elves, Humans, and Orcs are.

You're talking about breeding Labs with Chihuahuas, we're talking breeding Horses with Camels.

imagine the personality differences between elves and humans.
Humans are more driven and reckless than the average elf. Could be why every once in a while an elf wants a relationing with a human.
Personally i think half elves and human/elf relationships only seem common because PCs want all the bonuses of being an elf without the -2 con or whatever it is these days.
>tfw no elf gf

storytime that shit.

Are you still together?

>Humans are more driven and reckless than the average elf
I hate this piece of HFY so much.

It's kind of accurate for most fantasy though. Not Tolkien for sure, but while most fantasy is based on Tolkien, it's not 1:1, and elves especially have changed wildly.

It's not really HFY shit, just a common racial difference.

Tell me about those sttings then.

>Humans are more driven and reckless than the average elf
emphasis on average there champ. Remember that most elves sit around doing fuck all all day long, not all of them have balls of steel like fingolfin

Butthurt Elfen Manlet detected. Yeah I guess some don't like Orcs... They come to us instead.

And your average human is also pretty lazy.

your average human is selling himself in service to Sauron or Morgoth so he can fuck shit up and kick ass all day long

Oh, Marcilleposter. What am I going to do with you?

Here's some things you're not considering.

There's this thing called siring babies out of wedlock, one night stands, and boredom. Furthermore, you can look at it this way the lifespan of a human might actually be appealing. That's right, I said it. You basically get to experience all that phases of an elf relationship in the span of a few decades. Humans might be so short lived that it's not even a big deal to have a "short" fling with one of your human companions that lasts the remainder of their life. No guilt either as they die before you could grow completely bored of them in all ways. Don't forget young elves, elves young enough that this would be novelty or the age gap isn't too bad.

I'll leave you with this, Marcillefag

See these guys? Our ancestors unironically fucked these. When they encountered other human species they produced offpsring. Never underestimate how low someone's standards can go. Dutch sailors were desperate enough to fuck pure Aussie aboriginals too And people hooked up with shitty little kids all the time throughout history.

Anyway, what you should take away from this is that people (humans and elves) don't always make optimal choices. They really fucking don't.

Also orcs and humans are not on good terms. Elves and humans get along.

How is that HFY? Those aren't always positive traits. It has its benefits but it also means compared to elves, humans are ADHD spastics that need to stick their dick in a fire to learn that it burns them.

Browsing Veeky Forums as a woman seems to be getting continually more distressing lately.

There are rare times I regret not getting into a hobby where the community doesn't appear to collectively hate my guts because of my sex;

but then I imagine my alternate self having an emotional meltdown in her middle-age because I was never able to roleplay as an elf sorceress with a thri-kreen boyfriend.

Elves are not as stupid and depraved as humans.
Except wh40k of course

Because HFY will ignore these flaws and spend long paragraphs how humans have this innate power of awesomeness that no other race has.

>Browsing Veeky Forums as a woman seems to be getting continually more distressing lately.
Take it to your safe space, darling.

>Veeky Forums
>knowing shit about women
pick one

I have to admit, I'm struggling to understand why the blue person is fantasizing about standing in a shoulder-high pit.

They totally are. There was a whole book about it called the The Silmarillion. Besides D&D elves are frequently Chaotic and aren't as above humans as Tolkien elves, if at all. Seriously anything with Chaotic tendencies is going to be depraved and weird on some level.

You're not a woman user.

Why go on the internet and tell lies?

Women are meme people.

He wants to go crawl into a hole.

This is a basic visual pun, user. Step up your game.

What's so depraved about Tolkiens elves?
Please don't say Kinslaying. That's a bad thing, but not the same as being a sexual deviant.

I was thrown off by the way that, like, if you wanted to crawl in a hole you'd want it to be one that hides you from/blocks your view of what's bugging you, wouldn't you? But sure.

>I see that you don't know that Sex Tourism is a big thing these days for Western European women.

So they go off to foreign countries to have affairs with Jamal under their husband's noses. Sounds awfully Elfen...

>And that your comparison is pretty bad because the attraction to novelty only works if it's actually novel. So it's going to happen among the upper classes of Orcs who have adopted Elven culture although they might revert back to their traditional Orcish stances when convenient.

Judging by how European women reacted with glee when the dregs of the ME swarmed into Europe, I'm going to call BS on this. So yeah, my comparison still holds up as Elfen women LOOOVEEE the green dick as they keep demanding it.

>Most Elven women would be apalled at hooking up with the regular orcs when they're exposed to them regularly, but if they were just traveling there for a week or if they found a wandering Orc that they knew wouldn't stick around . .

Still doesn't destroy my comparison. All I gotta do is point at Sweden and this point just falls apart. European women seem to lust after the desert rats, just like how Elves have lucid dreams of Shrek.

>And also you forgot that the likelihood of not getting pregnant is a big point in favour of the casual sex as well.

This point doesn't hold up either. In RL accidents still happen which is a big reason why abortion is being pushed so hard by known adulteresses. Plus in settings like Eberron, Half Elves are race of their own. The likelihood is clearly not that low.

>Your shitty Europe analogy kind of fails because the actual races aren't separate enough to nearly the same degree as Elves, Humans, and Orcs are.

Maybe so as it was made in jest, but...

>You're talking about breeding Labs with Chihuahuas, we're talking breeding Horses with Camels.

No we aren't. Elves still produce mixed race offspring capable of reproduction in DND. It's very much just fantasy breeding.

>thread created two hours after the last elf general imploded because of shitposting
Sometimes I believe this is false flagging to make us hate elves more.

>Sounds awfully Elfen...
What setting?

Because dnd came out with half-elves before it was revealed that it's not how it works in Tolkien.
/thread

That bit was less the depraved stuff and more the stupid part. But in all seriousness we like to think that's depravity but all that shit is arguably normal. In the way kids picking their nose and doing other gross shit until they learn it's wrong is normal. Sort of. And the thing is, elves have parents too. Parents that needed to tell them to stop picking their damn nose and eating the boogers. Seriously, that's disgusting. Stop it.

Here's another thing. Ennui is a hell of a drug. A longer lived being has a greater capacity for depravity due to ennui.

Why do you never see half elves half orcs?

Elves are dishonest and tricky by nature. Just ask the little men of the hills, the Dwarves. They know all about the Knife ears and their treacherous ways.

What? They're in D&D all the time.

In 3.5 they get an extra feat and one extra skillpoint when leveling up.

>Knife ears
OPINION DISCARDED

Let me fix this:
>browsing Veeky Forums seems to be getting continually more distressing lately.

We're getting /pol/ed. That's what you get for ironic shitposting - it becomes a reality.

But elves aren't as stupid and depraved as humans. You also take your conclusions from human nature for a fictional race.

Alright. You asked for it: Depends on the setting. They're either just as stupid, depraved, or at least one of those in many settings. And it's totally not unreasonable to give their behavior a basis in reality. The parent thing is a good analogy. I don't know about you but I don't think any being save gods are born knowing not to pick their nose.

By the way, if you want to play that game, I can say your claims about a multisetting and multimedia fictional race are just as baseless.