You are an adventurer. A hero to some, but nothing but a murderer and brigand to others...

"Pizza delivery."
"We're having a promotional give-out, can you please sign here and report the quality of service in the nearest DiJiorno pizza outlet when you are done?"
"Thank you for your time, and have a nice day."

>as I close the door behind me and walk out, I hear a loud explosion as the dragon opens the pizza box and motion-triggers four pounds of semtex inside

>The Dragon is immune to pressure and fire damage, and the shrapnel barely scuffs it's scales.
>The Dragon then puts out word on you to it's friends and elder kin that run merchant empires that you attempted to kill their precious naive younger trapbrother/sister.

We Shadowrun now, you best start researching trans-galactic travel boy.

>puts out word on you
Well, I guess DiJiorno pizza's profits drop sharply.
I'm fine, however. It's not like I'm a filthy dumb SINner or something, who doesn't disguise before bombing people.

You motherfucker, you destroyed a good pizza producer.

That makes your sum evil-itude approximately 40 decaHitlers.

>deca
Surely I'm not as evil as 400 Hitlers.

Oh, and I keep sending the same pizza box to him every day via routes that can't be traced back to me, to make sure he remembers me.

A gentle feeling buds in the dragon's heart as his daily routine now features opening the same box and getting a fistful of harmless shrapnel in his face.

Then, one day, the box is gone, and the dragon is consumed by ennui, and curiousity of where has the pizza box guy gone, as he realizes that he misses me, and his life starts spiraling out of control due to depression.

Mission. Fucking. Accomplished.

Eh, he's a dragon.

He may be fond of mortals but they are mortal, at best it would be the rough equivalent of having the cat you occasionally fuck die on you.

Why did you have to rub your feline douchefagness all over the dragon user?

It may not be magical realm, but it's still that really stupid unoriginal "HURR DURR THE EVIL THING WAS REALLY A CUTE LITTLE GIRL" trope that Veeky Forums autists love so much when they think they're being new and creative.

Plenty legitimate reason to leave the table before you waste more of your time.

I was hired to kill a dragon and I will leave here with its head.

My character murders for a living, has for the majority of his life. This isn't the moment he grows a conscious.

>Girl

That's a boy dragon user.

To be fair, it wasn't really described as much of an evil thing to start with. Just as being sort of... there, and spooking excitable townsfolk.

Well, I can't deny, I did it on pawpose, and it is unfurtunate, but purrsonally, I find his mewsery hissterical and purriceless comedy gold. Purrhaps that will teach him a lesson not to get attached to people.

I would inquire as to whether or not the Dragon would be interested in acquiring the head of the local Lord for a price slightly superior to that of the reward the Lord is promising.

The exact second the villagers/nobles realize selling its shed hair is worth a year of their work is the same second where they suddenly feel very welcoming of the dragon.

Dragons are pretty much living wells of renewable resources, especially the furred ones. Just shave its ass and you have yourself gold. Fluffy, alchemically charged gold.

Though that might just end up with them attempting to imprison it rather than slay it.

I come to the realization that it is I who is the doppelganger and replace the Local Lord.

inform her that she is living on lands owned by the local lord and that she must pay her taxes or get out.

I can totally imagine a much more purposefully sexualized female dragon. Even if looking more like a dragonborn is out of the question, like if dragonboobs are too much then a breastplate or shirt + a sexualized pose + one size step over a human is all ya need.

What a shocker, a major sexual turn on is turning innocuous things that are cute or innocent in some format into something lewd.

>You will never cuddle a fluffy dragon girl

And that's how he got other runners after him... Don't fuck with a quality service that delivers to safehouses.

"This land is peaceful, it's inhabitants kind"

There's nothing wrong with that, unless you go full projection mode and blame others for your own deviant urges.

Realize that the dragon sightings, since no attacks were actually reported, were just villager hearsay and approach the dragon.

Talk to the dragon honestly and tell it what is going on. Ask it if it wants to try and live here or if it wants to move somewhere else to avoid being hunted by another, less ethical adventure.

Also, maybe sex.

You don't know that.

Looks fluffy, so attempt to pet it. By force if necessary.

>Touch fluffy tail.

Kill it anyhow?

check the crown dude, its silver, probably solid. The thing is pretty clearly aiming to project cuteness and that is obviously in the interests of self preservation. Kill that fluffy dragon.

>You are an [...] talents are undeniable.
Rad.

>Now, you find yourself in a quest [...] offered you a handsome reward.
The fact that there's been no attacks makes me think this is poking at a hornet's nest. I go in quiet and under the guise of curiosity instead of being there for the murdercash.

>However, as you talk [...] is there, a visitor?"
Explain the dragon sightings, ask what the creature knows. Maybe it knows where the dragon is.

NO, YOUR VISITOR TODAY WILL BE DEATH. I'M JUST AN UNINVITED GUEST.

Oh my gosh she's so cute and remind me of a more fit alphys, I wanna watch anime, be friends with her and pet her on the head

Ask if it's seen any dragons recently.
I'm pretty sure it isn't a dragon.