> you and your party are walking through the woods
> you begin to fear night may fall before you reach the village
> suddenly an Original Character (do not steel) steps out of the shadows
> the Rouge calls out
> 'you alright there pall? It's a bit warm for wearing a trench-coat'
> His eyes turn red
> he flash-steps behind you
> (like in Naruto my favorite show)
> unzips Katana
> whispers 'he, two easy'
How do you proceed?
But what he didn't realize was that I had already wrote his name in The Death Note as he walked out on our clan for refusing to learn how to perform the deadly art of dual katana wielding. He claimed the technique was too brutal. Now he'll see true brutality.
I pack up my belongings and leave, never to return again. Having no game is better than having a game run by a fucking garbage GM.
It was a hologram.
Aha, you have the lightning bolt eye rasengan. I know of it...
But I can't tell you why (her past is dark and she can't'nt tell it)
>She waits, ready to perfectly parry the next attack with godlylike speed,
> there is no next attack
> there are next attacks
> with a single sword she attacks from a thousand directions at the same time using the hamamagestu blood technique
> everything is also electrified
This feels weird.
>"Hey GM this is a funny joke, but when can we get back to the game?"
It's like when someone tells you to "get the laughs out of your system" before doing something. Engaging in juvenile freeform like this is one of the most base forms of catharsis there is for tabletop players.
That, or people just want a good laugh.
Is there a girl around? I rape her.
You awake on the floor in a dusty old wine cellar, bruised and slightly sick. You have a dull headache, and your hands are tied together behind your back. You still have your clothes, but all your gear is gone. There is a staircase leading up to an ajar door, with rays of warm light spreading from it. You hear the sound of elven laughter in the distance
>What do you do?
>free self
>escape elf
I become a universe devouring blackhole and destroy everything, him included.
>whisper "right where I want you..."
>jump into the air.
>Deliver the most devastating RKO ever seen.
>go for the cover.
Flash step faster, trip him up. Grab his face and absorb his appearance because I can steal powers.
Turn him into a busty woman!
>free self
>escape elf
Calling upon the strength of your dwarven ancestors, you strain against and the elven rope, and with incredible effort, break the fine veawing in twain. Free once again, you proceed to sneak up the staircase and peak out the door, to get an overview of your situation.
You see three elf guards sitting around a round table, drinking wine and playing cards and dice. They seem fairly drunk. One of them tells a story about the dwarf woman he once captured, likening her to a hairy boar in heat.
>How dost tho proceed, master dwarf?
>Break elves
>Steal weapons
Taken by a violent mood, you begin frothing at the mouth, the saliva running down your tangled beard.
You break down the door, and roar the puny elf guards and charge them as they sit on the table.
With their slowed intoxicated minds, they are unable to react quickly enough to draw their weapons before you reach the table.
Rolled 17 (1d20+5)
You punch the closest elf in the head, crushing his nose and dislocating his jaw in a splattering of blood.
Rolled 6 (1d20+5)
You swing at the elf to your right, but miss as he drunkenly falls over the chair in surprise.
Rolled 6 (1d20+5)
You attempt to flip the table on top of the last elf, but slip on the spilled wine and blood and fall on your hairy ass.
To your extraordinary luck, there is a masterfully wrought elven short sword that fell of the guard you punched, and landed beneath the table. You hurriedly take it.
>What do you do?
Two things.
1: My character has an ability that negates any attack that would one-shot him, and another that takes all the negated damage and bursts it out, much like the Royal Guard style in DMC.
2: His body is corrupted to breaking point and he deliberately cursed himself to be very, very weak to all forms of damage.
Go ahead and slash if you want. The more modifiers on your shitty katana, the larger the resulting crater.
Nuh uh! I have sword-proof armor!
...
Squat with perfect form and roll for intimidate with my perfect, chiseled glutes
Why do you keep making this thread user