What the hell is she doing?

What the hell is she doing?

Comparing her tattoo to the symbol on the statue.

"Huh, I wonder if it would fit?"

But really, she's comparing the tattoo on her hip to one of the markings on the stone idol.

Tattoo on thigh matches stone carving.

>"Imma fuck this statue"

It's one of those treasure chests that only opens its wonderous contents after a good poledance.

Wizards are a perverted bunch, but what did you expect from a bunch of 30+ year old virigns?

Like all women, when confronted with something vaguely phallic, her first impulse is to insert it into an orifice.

>How drunk was I? Dad is going to lose his shit.

No, you are thinking of yourself.

We bumped into a wizard like this, save for the virgin part
We'd come to his tower and found him recently deceased at the hands of Drow (From what his magical/semi-intelligent will said, the fuck he had before they came back to geek him for insulting the priestess during sex was totally worth it). He wanted us to find out who'd killed him, and offered his tower as a reward. The activation phrases for his Arcane Eyes and the "security system" attached to them were all things like "Finigan is packing" and "Damn, what did she look like?" for the playback

The boy adventurers were all peeing on artifacts and she felt left out.

Giving me a boner.

>this cursed statue turns woman to men
>check in your pants, you may find somethin'

She's clearly checking her runic tatoo on her hip against the one on the ancient dwarven pillar to make sure it's spelled/scribed correctly.

Isn't that the halfling from the 3.5 phb?

Too bad she was drunk that night. The Dwarf tattoo artist was always annoyed by dumb party sluts asking for "Dwarven Power Tats", and decided to screw with her that night.

Little did Samantha know, the Dwarven Rune for "She who is great" is but one small rune etching away from "She who is whore".

Of course clueless to this phenomena, Samantha has recently been getting much attention from fellow Dwarves and Stone Giants.

And now she stands here next to this ancient Dwarven Funeral Idol, and is thinking: "Wow, like, omg, the dwarf who made this must've sucked balls. Can't even spell she who is great".

Remember kids, don't be a Samantha.

She is about to take a shit.

Stripping for her boy. What else would she be doing? Making a sandwich?

>gotta check my hip tat
>might as well scratch my asshole while I'm down here

>literally have thing tattooed on you for presumably a long time
>still need to check what it looks like once it is finally relevant
?

>I want to fuck this stone cock so bad right now

...

we shannara chronicles now

best edit

>wizard
>not a virgin
unpossible!

Rolling to seduce.

She's looking at a McGuffin

That's why he died, yo. When a wizard becomes an unvirgin, the universe will find a way to fuck them over. In the previous example, it was via drow. Who knows, the next unvirgin wizard will have his featherfall spell fail just as he tries to walk over that ravine. Or maybe the rogue decides it's a good time to backstab him. Or maybe that orc tribe gets a message from their shaman that the wizard's been messing with the natural order and a wild hunt's been called. That sorta thing.

So, if wizards have no sense of right or wrong, is it because they're virgins?

Don't know what's more lewd, anachronistic thong or just no pan. I prefer no pan just because it makes more sense.

She is making him rock hard

>best
I assure you there's room for further improvement

Posing for the picture

Comparing her tattoos with the markings on the statue.

...

I recognize that bulge

wrong, the glimpse of thongs is the lewdest part