Worst game you've played

Yes, please.

cont'd, then

>Captain Adora Randor gives up on piloting after making one bad roll
>okay, onward to adventure
>the rest of the crew are a grizzled old human artillery captain, a mechanic whose species is that fat four-armed guy from Attack of the Clones, a Bothan hobo, and a min-maxed bounty hunter who's a spoiled noble rich boy dressed all in tight leather
>I try to play up the drama of being a second-class citizen that nobody cares about
>I buy the maximum amount of Obligation for literally being the property of the rich boy's dad
>I don't get to vote at crew meetings
>When we get a map of our ship and everyone's fighting over rooms, I volunteer to sleep in a supply closet
>We're on a pretty generic mission to smuggle some stuff to the Rebels. Haggling for a reward.
>It turns out that our good captain is reluctant to use her two different ways of fucking with people's minds, because she gets really offended when people don't naturally like and trust her
>I can't tell if this is good roleplaying or if this is actually how her player thinks
>In any case, I notice that she's generally not paying attention when it comes time to make decisions
>I'm still a Separatist, so I figure I'm an anarcho-capitalist at heart, with dreams of going into business for myself and making a shit-ton of money
>Also destroying the Empire, not because they blew up a planet of hippies, but because I am STILL butthurt about those trade disputes nobody remembers.
>While the captain is off shopping or something dumb like that, I claim that she told me to sit in for her at the meeting and carry out her instructions for how to vote
>I put forth a plan to buy a bunch of legitimate goods with the ship upgrade fund, hide the contraband inside it, and sell it all for a massive profit
>everyone else is fine with it
>now I have to assess local trade conditions and buy the right cargo
>nobody wants to trade with me because I'm a droid
>FUCK

>I'm pretty lucky she didn't get that last reference.
>I can't tell if this is good roleplaying or if this is actually how her player thinks
Maybe she's into some deep immersion, always in character shit.

>Played Monsterhearts
>I deserve everything bad happened to me because of that.
>I just want to play with Male!Buffy and punch Cthulhu in the face. Because the character's family is the guardian of the fucking Necronomicon.
>Forced to be a Nigga, because "LOLDiversityLOL"
>Half of the other play look coming from Tumblr Hell.
>Go with It, because i not playing for almost two years.
>The GM goes full Magical Realm.
>I only wanted to be a hero, ended as a fucking rapist.
>i dindu nuffin.

Cool futurama pasta did you make it yourself?

>and the worst part is now I need to enlist the help of the one organic I hate the most in the whole universe, worse than Jedi, worse than clones, worse than hippies, the only one whose strange fleshy assets can save us now
>Captain Adora Randor

The campaign didn't last super long after that, but I like that I had a tiny bit of a story arc with a legit Mary Sue

OP, yeah I was bored and thinking of ideas for a sci-fi game this afternoon.

Go on

My fucking roommate.

Roomie wants to run a Star Wars game at an upcoming convention. For weeks hes pumping up his original adventure. We all make characters, he gets some randos to make characters. Nice group, ready for Freddy.

We are sent to a desert world to investigate some ruins. No encounter on the way to or on the planet. The ruins turn out to be a Stargate. No one wants to go into the Stargate room because this is stupid and we can tell what he's planning. Nope, doesn't matter, Stargate randomly activates and sucks everyone in the sucks everyone in anyway.
The end.

He spent weeks on this stupid thing, seven people made characters, the entire session ran 90 minutes, mainly because of roleplaying between characters and ended off with non Star Wars canon.

Fast forward a year.

I get my hands on the Ghostbusters RPG. Awesome. I freaking love Ghostbusters and my games often devolve into jokey fuckery. This was going to be tight.

I suggest my two players, my roomie and my bff, play fictionalized versions of themselves in our hometown. Bff says he was an archaeologist interested in the occult and bought into the Ghostbuster's franchise. Perfect backstory. Roommate makes his character techy, I suggest he answered a want add to run the containment system. Big nope. Roomie gets pissy that he can't make his own backstory. Finee, proceed with backstory: Apparently one day my roommate was surfing the internet and discovered something and now ...
Honest to god, that is the back story he came up with, verbatim. He pissily accepted my backstory when we did not jizz our pants at his awesome idea.

First mission is a haunted cab. He had no points in his proton pack, so he kept shooting it and missing, causing property damage city officials tell him he's responsable for. I remind him the game is built around humour, not shooting stuff until it dies. Roomie just keeps shooting. Bff eventually jumped into the cab and turned off the meter. Roomie almost cried in anger.

Ugh, some people. Although shooting wildly is a big part of the first movie, so if he timed it better it could be funny.

Worst game I ran (forever GM)
>sciFi homebrew
>Blade Runner-esque but less 80's dystopia, more shiny 00's
>Players are a privatized military unit
>Encourage them to make unique characters with free reign to make just about any scifi archetype
>they turn in their characters (described as follows): "Spartan II from Halo", "One of those Aliens from Pitch Black", "Samus, but a Dude", "Dante from Devil May Cry" and "R2D2".
>mfw
>figure this train wreck should be interesting if everyone plays as larger than life PCs
>nope.jpg
>rpgs are serious business
>first mission has them infiltrating an enemy R&D lab full of private security
>go through underground access tunnels thanks to R2D2's hacking skills. Spartan on point, AfPB skulking across the ceiling, Dante brooding, R2D2 whistling and Mr.Samus covering the rear
>small security detail at end of hall. Spartan tosses grenade, flubs the roll and drops it at his feet doing a shit-ton of damage to himself
>alerts security and a bloodbath ensues as AfPB rips them to shreds. Spartan tried to cover with his rifle but burned two clips of ammo and didn't hit a thing
>keep moving and get to end of tunnels where two heavily armed sentry droids are waiting
>droids are described as large, dome-bodied, quadrupeds with dual mini-guns, infrared scanners and a hard-line cable connected to the mainframe security system. Cut the cable and they default to shooting anything that moves
>AfPB charges in...get cut to pieces by mini-guns
>Mr.Samus charges his cannon
>Dante aims for hard-lines but can't hit them
>Spartan throws a grenade, flubs the roll. Grenade goes off at his feet again, this time killing him and Dante
>Spartan Player ragequits because "This game is retarded. The Chief would never miss!"
>R2D2 hacks sentry1 and uses it to wreck sentry2
>Mr.Samus fires charged cannon, killing sentry1

The session and game ended there with our heroes down three, having never actually made it into the building.

>How could people never saw X, Y and Z!?
Maybe because it didn't appeal to them. Or never heard about it. Or simply don't care.
There are dozens of possibilities, getting rectal about them is simply childish.
Here, try this - Star Trek was never shown by any TV station in my country. Ever. Same applies to Firefly (but amazingly Serenity was broadcasted few times as a late-night filler). I only know about those franchises due to my own personal interest about what the hell everyone is even talking about, not because I ever seen any of the two.

But speaking of misconceptions - I had to once stop the game, launch the PC and search net for few videos explaining crossbow construction and operation, because turns out only one of four players had ANY broad idea how they work, so it ended really messy when party's mage started to apply telekinesis against crossbowmen.

Supporting this with similar account. Futurama was axed in here in '04 due to extremely low viewer share, before they even run out of episodes. And nobody was crying about it, since fandom didn't even exist back then. If not for "take my money" meme, probably nobody would ever know the show ever existed at this point.

...

well played OP, well played

>My first capes game using Heroes Unlimited
>The party consists of Gumshoe Dick, Boxing Horseman, and me playing AI Ironman
>GM is a longtime friend of the group, a brother to another player. I've never played with him before.
>We're tasked with investigating evil cape organization movements. Except all of our investigating leads to dead ends. Everyone in speak with or interview become extremely hostile when we start asking too many questions.
>"You get the feeling they want to shoot you in the face" is a common response when we've asked someone more then three questions about a subject.
>We get into some fights vs badguys and they have weird laser guns that can basically kill any of us in one hit.
>When we finally get our hands on one, I do science to it and find out the guns run on some kind of fucking common mineral like granite or some shit. No amount of testing or research can get the weapon to fire again, they only seem to function when operated by bad guys. I'm unable to detect if they can potentially run off psionics.
>Out of no where, bad guys broadcast across the whole city that they've taken a bunch of subway trains full of people hostage and for no one to do anything.
>Now that I realize how these weapons operate, I go to work.
>GM "Alright, what are you going to do?"
>"Now that I know what powers these guns, I'm going to attempt to construct a sonic weapon that would focus sound waves at the correct frequency to shatter the crystals so their guns wont work"
>"Looking into it more you realise that the frequency needed to shatter the crystals is also the same frequency that would destroy the subway tunnels. If you fired the weapon down there, the whole place would cave in."
>"Fucking what?"
>I'm dumbstruck at this point, but the GM wont budge, even when I point out, that it is extremely unlikely that concrete and granite can break at the same frequency, but I don't want to get too into it because cape shit.

I'll take shit that didn't happen for $500, Alex.

>This scenario goes on for an hour and a half, with the party unable to come to a decision about what to do, because we can't act without someone being in danger. Eventually the bad guys just leave. We can't figure out what they did, or took, or anything. They just leave. In the last bit of the game, Gumshoe accidentally slips the private intel related to my character to some FBI agent, about my parent company (because I was build by somebody) and the USE government shuts the company down and freezes all of its assets basically destroying my "life" and everyone I know goes to jail.
>We escape to Hawaii with a cargo container full of spare parts.
>Game ends
>The group is confused that for some reason when guy offers to GM the game again, I politely decline.
I've never been able to play a capes game since. I'm a little pissed my only jaunt into a capes game was ruined.

>USE
Holy shit I'm going to bed.

Yeah, Monsterhearts is BtVS like the episode where everybody sings and Willow date rapes her girlfriend and they break up, or the episode where Buffy starts fucking Spike, not the ones where they shoot the judge with a rocket launcher.

But did you have fun?

Bring this one up everytime a thread like this rolls around.

Rogue Trader game with a fun group, mostly.
Tried and trusted GM who is good at creating a Sandbox and leaving us plenty of trails to follow, while being able to work off the cuff to deal with what we do.

Me playing a squirrily AdMech, who runs Engineering like a miniature communist fiefdom with the head of his predecessors mounted along the front of the main engineering bay.

Seneschal played by guy I didnt know that well but seemd cool enough, acting essentially like a mix out of super competent butler and Mutley. Pretty much the only reason we would actually make money out of our few endeavours was this guy.

Void Master played by another guy I didnt know, didnt really have much personality beyond, grizzled navy vet turned private and that he was more prone to violence than the Ork.

Navigator played by my friend who had invited me to the group. Was a short little jerk with a chip on his shoulder who would routinely scare civilians and the crew by threatining to melt their faces. Mostly competent, little to interested in Eldar artifacts but paranoid about chaos and demonic taint - Call of Cthulhu paranoid about old ruins and ancient tomes of knowledge.

Ork Freebooter, complete with pegleg made our of a Truks suspension and pet shoulder Squig. Was played by a friend who could do both a convincing "pirate" and "Ork" accent and managed to play a funny ork character without being "lolsorandumb". May have purchased some Grots and Gretchen off of him to fix and clean things in the nooks and crannies event he Immature Labor Force couldnt reach.

Was all set to be a fun game and it was, except we had a That Guy as Captain, who played the most obnoxius Rogue Trader ive seen, even by Rogue Trader standards, and was secretly (not so secretly) a cultist of Slaanesh, something he wasnt at all subtle about and took no efforts to really hide when we needed to trade on Imperial Worlds. Impreial SHRINE worlds.

OP you cheeky bastard, nice one.

Would of kind of been fun if he hadnt been the sort to whine anytime things went badly because of his actions. Like when we found out the Inquisition had some guys after us after he had seduced and mentally broke Sororitas initiate on a Shrine world (and made no efforts to hide his tracks) while the rest of us were trying to unload a large shipment of Incense and Dead IG. Freebooter was busy putting down small mutiny in the Mess Hall after he insulted the cooking.

Then lost his shit when Inquisitor caught up with us, boarded under pretense of seeking a possible rogue psyker and then not so subtlely hinted that he knew exactly who and what our captain was and had a shit load of intel on us. Most of the group pretty much cottoned on that we were being shanghaid into doing a mission for the Inquisitor via blackmail. Captain Twat decided that he was being unfairly persecuted and punished for playing his character. Through a fit and basically refused to play.

We tried to keep going forward but Captain wasnt cooperating even at the next session and game sort of died. Heard GM had restarted similar game with some of the old characters recycled and without that guy, but sadly out of town by then.

That fucking blows. I'm sorry that you had to deal with a fucker like that.

>Join a CoC game midway through as an eastern european doctor with multiple ranks in medicine and knowledge in ancient lore.
>GM says one of the other players is an ex-student of mine who's called me in to save this NPC who's suffering from a mysterious illness.
>Inspect the NPC
>Notice bite marks on the neck, make my Ancient Lore check to indentify it as vampires
>GM reminds me it's the 1800's nobody is going to beleive that it's vampires.
>Even though we all know it's vampires.
>So I immiediately order everyone to give her a transfusion.
>The guy playing the Noble makes a comment about how it's like their married already.
>I resist the urge to point out that both me and the Cowboy have already donated half a pint.
>Afterwards I bolt the doors and windows and wreath Garlic fucking everywhere.
>GM has the Maid come in at 11 and remove them and open the windows because she thought the room was stuffy.
>RAAAAAIIILLLROOOOOOAAAAD

A few sessions later the GM Sisters boyfriend joined the group as her PC's fiance. He was pretty chill, although his character started with san-loss, and where a conveyance lawyer get's a Kukri I'm sure I don't want to know.
Anyhow the sister's PC gets vamped herself because the fucking other Doctor's player had been willfully ignoring all of the GM's hints that the Vampire had a thrall in the asylum where we were keeping her and we end up in a goddamn roadtrip across Europe to try and shank the thing.

>everyone donate blood to her regardless of blood type
>It just works

Cheers, it was a massive let down after having spent a week chatting with the others coming up with ideas.

Only reason That Guy had captain is because he called dibbs first and then didnt speak about his character until the day.

Seriously, how much experience did Van Helsing have over the rest of the party? I know he was almosy retired by the time of Dracula, but shit.

I have a nagging suspicion that the fun I did have was entirely non-interactive and just bringing everyone else down. The GM was terrible and nobody paid attention to the adventure, the other players were generally bored and distracted, and even I was bored most of the time. But despite all that there was potential, potential I guess we never realized.

But he was Dutch

We played using Hang Out, so i think there a video somewhere of this shit. I hope not.

So, since your thread seems to actually just be a joke, can we delete it?

> Decided to try a game for the 1st time with strangers, i knew them through the local rpg association
> They seemed cool, the DM prepared a whfb one-shot
> Right at the start the DM starts rolling his marijuanas
Never saw a DM high so I began having concerns but kept them for myself
> 1 hour in and he gets all dozy
> I try to focus on the game and the other players
> Can't go on since the whole doens't even make sense after some point
> He goes "fuck it, let's call him John" for every NPC
> It gets awkward since we're at his home
> During a travel, he says "wow ok, let's have some gobs here, they appear right in front of you, 30 m away"
> After a tedious combat everyone pretends to be tired at 11h30 and leave
> Never contact them again

Had a player that used to do this.

He would get high as fuck and when people called him on his shit, he would respond, "Dude, I'm a little high right now, okay. Cut me some fuck'n slack!" He also referred to himself in third person while stoned.

He was best buds with the ringleader of the group, so if he fucked off, so did the hivemind.

Told him he couldn't bring weed anymore, so he'd get high as fuck and then show up. Kicked him (and the group) to the curb shortly after. Sucks because some of them were cool shit.

Seeing as how he made all these references one could assume that he lives in a country that isn't a third world piece of shit and actually has access to good television and movies instead of whatever trash your watching, therefore her not getting at least ONE of those is pretty terrible, especially the Ducktales reference seeing as how one would assume she was young enough to watch that as a kid.

This My wife's a farm girl who wasn't born under a rock, just next to it and she'd manage one of those...
This coming from the girl who wanted to know why the Galactica wasn't beaming people up and no one was using lightswords.

I can sympathize.
>DMing online for some friends, everyone is reasonable and friendly.
>One girl decides to have her character start drinking non-stop.
>Sure, whatever, just so long as it doesn't get obnoxious.
>She decides to drink along at home.
>From sober to smashed within half an hour.
>Ask her to stop when she's losing coherence.
>She keeps drinking.
>Ask how much she's had.
>She can't remember. "Around eight", she says.
>Tell her that if she can't remember how much she's had, she should probably stop.
>She keeps drinking.
>Has her character start treating all the other PCs like shit.
>Then gets so drunk she can't keep IC and OOC separate, starts treating the other players like shit.
>Put my foot down, tell her to get out until she sobers up.
>She got black out drunk, couldn't remember why were so pissed at her the next day.
>Group explains to her what she did and why it's unacceptable.
>Say we'll let it slide if she promises not to drink during the game anymore.
>Opts to throw a fit and leave the group instead.
>Cuts off all contact with everyone in the group.
None of us have heard from her in about three years at this point. I'd be more broken up about it if she hadn't spent those last few days being a colossal bitch.

And that's why I don't let my players drink anymore. That and the one time I DM'd for my roommate, who went from a mild jerk into an asshole when drunk.

why do people turn into shitheads when drunk?
when i get drunk i become the nicest guy in the world

Well, alcohol lowers inhibitions. If Veeky Forums has taught me anything, it's that some people are just good at hiding the fact they're bastards.

For me, alcohol mellows me out, because I can get high strung. I just stop worrying about petty shit after a couple shots. But I'm a light weight that sips a rum and coke or two, at most. When my roommate drinks, he shoots back so many shots of Everclear that he literally cannot stand. And he's a BIG guy. 6' 6" tall, incredibly fat.

i get drunk in moments and sober up just as fast

Are you on any sort of medication? I have a friend whose painkillers magnify the effects of alcohol greatly, but don't slow down the processing of it, so if he drinks he'll get sloshed for like an hour off just a couple drinks.

Ideally it would do both. Anyone know if Monster of the Week is any better?

>"This game is retarded. The Chief would never miss!"

>Television not buying overpriced shitty American series
>HURR THIRD WORLD PIECE OF SHIT DURR

Monster of the Week is like the Xfiles episodes where they bring the lone gunmen, crossed with the parts of supernatural that aren't about feelings. It's all fight, no fuck, and to the best of my knowledge is a deliberate reaction to MH going the opposite way.

nope i'm perfectly fine

I'll be honest, I'm not sure if I was That Guy, or got too into it. This is a campaign from half a year ago.

>Playing 5th edition campaign.
>decide to play a dragonborn fighter, who's mostly specced out to be a defender dude who uses a fuckton of reach weaponry. Kind of a dude who wants to live up to his father's legacy of kidnapping, eating, etc... Father was a dragon and he wants to live up to it, tl'dr version.
>try to actually use tactics in battles
>d&d
>tactics
>party actually takes my advice, kind of bond with them
>actually start role-playing
>alignment: lawful evil
>youcanseewherethisisgoing.jpg
>get a dungeon where the princess at the end is apparently being held hostage by the BBEG
>rest of the party falls prey to traps, I purposely stay in the back prepared to betray the party so I can get some sweet princess boobs
>party is about to die.
>convince them to fall unconscious so I can betray the BBEG
>decide to not be a dick and betray them
>we do this in a combat scene so the DM doesn't realize
>BBEG is happy I betrayed my party and is planning to sacrifice them to a demon or something
>prepare to double-cross the BBEG
>DM is prepared for it though
>wait until BBEG is literally about to summon the demon
>shove him into the portal thanks to mad strength, DM rolled a 1
>portal closes
>see princess
>kidnap the princess, but disguise her as a servant
>get a random servant to look like the princess
>princess is already suffering from Stockholm syndrome and is apparently in love with me
>party wakes up
>party realizes, but realizes that with magic
>decide to be bros and help out
>DM is pissed off
>DM makes the princess become a lycanthrope for no reason
>I can no longer fuck the princess without being called a furry
>still fuck her
>DM proceeds to go autistic and start calling me a furry
>DM then fucking downs a bottle of whiskey and then demands everyone to get out
>we get kicked out
>Continue? It gets worse from here.

It's still hard to imagine someone wanting to play a Star Wars game who has nevdr seen any sci-fi. Even Star Wars itself shows the piloting of being separate from command of them in every case but the Falcon, which operates with a two man crew.

You were already playing a Dragonborn, I don't know why he thought accusations of furfaggotry would stop you.
Do continue, however.

I don't get it, and I want to so badly

See

Continued

>We decide to play at a friend's place, decide to continue from there.
>Guy has never DMed, but starts going full lore-nerd, he's kind of a neckbeard, somewhat overweight etc... Mostly just hangs by himself.
>I kind of help with this, via suggestions and editing his campaign documents.
>princess gives us a quest, apparently the king is a fucking douche and wants to kill dragons and sh-
>wat
>when were dragons good in this setting?
>ask the DM why he changed the lore from always lawful evil to any
>proceeds to tell me about my father who was "an epic hero" and shit
>proceed to tell him that my father was a red dragon who fucked shit up, not a hero
>DM is attempting to overrule my backstory with his
>ignore it, it's just a backstory anyways
>head back with princess waifu to the village
>suddenly the king's guards want the princess or whatever
>DM expects us to die for the princess or some shit, because he wasn't prepared when I gave them the princess.
>guard attempts to kill us anyways
>princess apparently is "deep in love" with me or some romantic shit
>DM is seriously trying to push this on us
>knock out the guards and personally take the princess to the king
>DM is slowly going magic realm whenever I talk to the princess.
>other players don't notice, because he passes notes
>I think at first the DM is just trying to role-play
>go to the king, king says I am a vile beast and must be killed
>princess apparently convinces him that I'm good in my heart or some hippy shit
>my character's kind of pissed off, he wants to live up to his father's reputation, not be the opposite of his father
>princess is heartbroken that I want to be like my father
>king then attempts to force me to marry his daughter
>At this point I am physically cringing in my seat, and the DM's fat fucking fingers are on my fucking dragonborn model I spent hours painting
>he's fucking moving it towards the princess.
>"I need to take a five minute smoke break outside, DM"
>Continue?

>choo choo
all aboard the cringe train
do continue

>She's playing a Xenon with force power
>Mary sue
I mean, the "legendary smuggler" part might be suspicious, but a xenon with force power is not a problem in itself. Don't act like it's not part of the system.

>Realize that the only way to restore sanity is to kill the princess and king
>DM is speaking in his fucking weird princess "accent"
>go up to kiss her hand, because nobles and shit do that.
>proceed to stab the shit out of the princess and king.
>DM is enraged, flings my model out of his fat fucking hands
>DM is demanding we get out of his cabin
>in the middle of the woods
>midnight
>we fucking walked here
>DM holds our shit hostage, and refuses to give it back
>don't feel like getting the police involved.
>party rogue comes back from getting some more Dr. Pibb (the best kind of cola)
>he gets kicked out, but has given us enough rations to continue the siege until morning
>when the DM goes out to walk around, we rush in and grab our shit and run the fuck out
>has taken pictures of the DM's computer
>apparently he fucking wrote an erotic story or something
>I am eternally disguisted by dragonborn, can barely play them. Though for some reason I can play any other draconic character fine.
>somehow escape the Magic Realm Forest (trademarked) after being there for two days
>another player tries to man up and says we can finish the campaign up at his house.

The campaign from there becomes less of the "worst game ever" and just really is the group just kind of taking control over the world or something. I can finish that up if you guys want, but it's actually not bad.

>never seen sci-fi
>only sci-fi referenced is the most entry level of entry level shit

I've never watched an episode of star trek but I sure as hell know sci-fi

Eh, I need closure.

Alrighty then.

>From there, the party decide to hop on the "Declare Empire" train, and immediately declares a coup.
>Apparently everyone is terrified of my guy, because he cut down a king and princess, UNSCATHED. (previous DMs kinda liked the whole anime ruler bullshittery, so rulers were the most powerful of their nation or some shit)
>Sorcerer then decides to cast Dragon-form on me.
>With permanency
>Proceed to go around eating kings and queens and shit with sorceror-bro
>Finally find my dad
>Dad is apparently proud of me, and gives me a hug and shit. Also makes some bitching hot chocolate.
>tfw when I lived up to the family name
>the family name of "Manmuncher"
>end the game with me owning half the continent as slaves, a level 20 young dragon, and free drinks at the local tavern. Everyone else pretty much retired to a different plane of existence or something like that.
>Dm even jokingly had a list of people I ate. Which was apparently over 2000
>DM has recently talked about continuing the campaign.

Yeah, it wasn't much, it was literally just two sessions and the DM wanted to finish up so we could do something else, a game called Shadowrun.

Well played, I generally admire when a player intelligently plays Lawful Evil.
Reminds me of that story about the Gnome caster who made a bunch of godly equipment for the party and when they turn on him for attempting to go full Lich he has the gear kill them.

Yeah, I was planning from there to start turning a little good, because I accomplished my main task. Make dad proud.

>eat thousands of people, enslave half a continent, all in a bid to impress dad
>ok NOW I'll start being good

That's... That's a good point.
Luckily it's just continuing in a few weeks, so I can actually erase that little bit of "turn good"

I didn't think it was a bad idea, I just got a chuckle out of it. You could attribute it to not needing to impress dad anymore and slowing down a bit with age. Now maybe you like to play with your food first; give them some random task and if they are entertaining enough let them go - if you aren't particularly hungry at the moment. It's not 'good', but it is 'better' in a cosmic sense.

>Eh, I can at least be nice to my pets.
>I'll still get to eat the troublemakers.

I suppose that might work, I'll write that down. I'll also hand that idea to the DM to see if he'll play ball.

I will say that my character's personality isn't really what you'd expect out of an evil character. He was actually quite soft-spoken, somewhat of a nice guy to most peasants, and was known to constatnly give drinks out for free when he got into town. Of course, that doesn't mean he wasn't evil. He was still arrogant, ruthless, and some times ate people, even before he was a dragon.
I believe he also abolished nobility so he could further autistically manage the kingdom, and proceeded to literally micromanage nearly every farm, business, and smithy. As in, come down in the morning and give them the daily quotas, taxes, etc.

>Freebooter was busy putting down small mutiny in the Mess Hall after he insulted the cooking.
>Freebooter
>the Ork

Truly he was a man of chaos if he managed to get the ork to do that.

>four person group, major autist, his little brother and me - minor autist and a a sort of beta nu-male hipster
>it isn't perfect(I'd even say that it's pretty shit) but it's a miracle that I even found people to play with, since I live in a middle of nowhere
>I'm the main GM of the group, runing mainly WhFRP
>one day I introduce VtM to my group
>worst mistake in my gaming career because it's simple as fuck so major autist and hipster want to run their games in it
>at first it's great because I can finally play, but it turns out all of their campaings are awfoul
>they don't even bother to read a rulebook, so we are playing whatever story they want to tell with Vampire lore and Storyteller system thrown on top of it
>one time major autist wants to run a campaing
>fearing for the worst I try to give him some advide using VtMB restaurant quest as an example
>"think of something simple, like puting a retaurant out of bussines and let us achieve it in our way while improvising"
>"allright user"
>session day comes
>it starts with vampire prince wanting to met us, which is how every campaing of his starts, he never uses subtle hooks
>I sense an mprovement because at least we aren't teleported to princes place immediately
>begining is acctually pretty allright, he gives each player a chance to introduce himself, etc.
>we arrive at princes place
>he gives us a "mission"
>"get me 10 vampire whores"
>vampire whores
>I try to stay open minded and follow this ridiculus storyline
>we check out multiple clubs
>we get to a "vampire brothel"
>before when we were describing ourselves I announced that my character walks around naked since he was a nosferatur almost never leaving his apartment and using obsufocate when he did
>when we got inside "vampire brothel" he told us that we see and orange "laser-like" light
>one of us asks what it is
>"it's a technology that shows every vampire true form when he/she walks into it"
>well fuck

rip

And for full coverage, there's also Black Stars Rise, written by the same people who wrote Dungeon World.

>A good way to describe what the characters do: you know how in The X-Files Mulder and Scully are always showing up to different places where strange things are happening? You’re going to play the people in one of those places, but Mulder and Scully are never going to show up and save the day. Good luck.

To be fair though, in the 1800's blood types hadn't even been discovered yet or at least not well documented enough.

>I stay outside while other players fuck around trying to recruit "vampire whores", since my character is computer oriented I google if prostitution is legal in california(game is set in LA) so we can snitch this shitshow to the police, close it down and recruit remaining vampire whores(I'm 90% sure it's not but I want to make sure)
>"prostitution is totally legal in Cali"
>rest of the group is thrown out of the club since vampire pim becomes extremaly hostile when someone ask him about his vampire whores
>irritated I suggest turning regular mortal whores into "vampire whores" but immidiatley back out of it saying that it'll be breaking Camarilla law
>few seconds later I get a phone call from a prince and he tells me that we can transform up to 5 mortal prostitutes for this task
>we get into two hour of wacky prostitution shenenigans where we invite some whores to our appartment, try to transform them
>"I don't know why you guys are failing so much at this, I though up THREE ways for you to finish this task"
>apparently he had three pre-planed routes and wouldn't have it any other way
>4th "vampire whore" in I give up say that I won't work for a retard who'll turn me into a seriall killer just because he wants to have vampire whores
>I activley try to fuck the prince over, forcing GM to stop railroading
>eventually he comes up with an idea
>some guy calls me(everyone in the city has my number despite me using burners exclusivley) and tells me to come to his club with my frieds
>we regroup, come to the guys club
>it's another vampire brothel
>the guy who invited me is vampire pim, wants us to destroy every other vampire brothel because he doesen't want any competition
>"but for now, drink this magic potion so you can have sex like regular mortals and enjoy my whores"
>I make up some bullshit excuse about my nosferatu losing his dick during transformation to avoid magical realm
We play this friday, I'll kill myself if this will go any longer.

Truly, you are in Hell

Pic related.

Ain't a *massive* fan of dungeon world, but that sounds pretty cool. Sorta like the Nightshift but more aliens, less sureal shit?