You will never be loved by an elf girl

>You will never be loved by an elf girl

Why even exist?

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ebin

To one day design the genetically superior human species, giving them increased lifespans, reduced affects of aging, and increased physical and mental abilities. I will give them pointed ears that serve no purpose but to make them easily identifiable from the lesser, baseline humans.

This has always been the way of mankind. When the world was too cold for our liking, we used fire. When the world told us man was not able to fly, we build planes and rockets.

If the world does not include cute elves? It is our right, perhaps even our duty, to make them.

In the future, our descendants will learn in class about how people once didn't have cute elves. And they will wonder how we ever lived like this.

>OP will never get a gf

feels good to exist

>Why even exist?
Good point, user. You should probably go ahead and stop existing, then.

>Why even exist?

My current gf is fairly kinky after years of growing up in a hugely sexually repressed culture and loves to take it up the ass.

I think I'll live.

When I look at my dog, she looks back and wags her tail. She's been such a good friend and in that moment I feel a pang of sorrow. She will be the sixth dog I've outlived. I find myself wondering if that's what it's like to be an elf with friends from another race.

I think she will be the last. My heart can't take it.

because I'd rather do all manner of unspeakably dark rituals in order to swap bodies with her

That....that is actually a REALLY good analogy, come to think of it.
I love my pets like family and worry about them if they get sick or hurt and spend time caring for them and playing with them, but I've outlived a few and it makes me very sad when I think about it happening again for my current ones.
I'll probably still get another cat when this one dies, but I'll nonetheless remember them fondly and love them while they're here.

we /t9g/ now?

>we /t9g/ now?

But Ribbon loves each and every one of you.

>You will never be loved by an elf girl
>IM-FUCKING-PLYING!

youtube.com/watch?v=_hxzyRiJcYs

I'm too busy chasing real girls to care that I'll never score with something that doesn't even exist.

Did the artist even attempt to gauge where an ear should be?

>hurr human dicks so big
>durr muh half-elves

You have no idea. No idea about elfish sexuality. Yes, after a century having sex with a human was a novelty, when sex with elves, be it with men or women, has become stale. But he had no idea how to please an elf, completely ignored the ears and was done after 15 minutes. The foreplay was a joke, barely existing. Even worse with orcs. I found pleasure in the pain these animals deliberately caused, even though, or maybe because, they didn't care about me feeling any pleasure at all. But this too didn't do it after a while. And after this humiliating cohabitation I often had to trick or even kill them because those brutes thought they owned me now. At least the humans try to sneak out of the bed-chamber as fast as possible, thinking they have created some bastard child.

Then there are the week-long luxury orgies in the elfish high society. These are expansive and you could become drug-addicted, but you drift in a sea of pleasure and decadence for what feels like a lifetime. Your feeble minds would break enduring only one day of this.

But also this lifetime comes to an end. Then begins the big search. Rumors about creatures that make the heart fear and the cheeks blush. I have seen more of the world than all of you mortals combined, just to find these creatures and still my lust.

The world is finite and so are its creatures. I'm back to my home, borrowing that one book about summoning all the time. The librarian knows, I see comprehension and concern every time in her look. She knows that I risk my life, my mind and soul, just to get the climax. It's also covered in all kinds of slime when I bring it back.

We're not too far from fetal genetic modification on a massive scale. Assuming the hippies don't fuck it all up like they did with golden rice, in twenty years it might simply be unheard of for children to be born in the first world with an IQ lower than 130. Designer babies will probably come along sometime around that.

Elves in the context of girls with pointy ears, that's a bit far-fetched, but elves in the context of superior aryan waifus who have no genetic illnesses and are superior in virtually every way to the common stock? Those are coming.

>elf girl
user, please.
PLEASE
PUH-LEASE

Who even gives a shit?
I want to be a fucking wizard.
If I could bring the magic, if I could bring the sourcery into the mundane life full of technology and knowledge, if I could bring wild wizardry into the real world, I would do anything.
I would sacrifice elves and monster girls, and whatever other potential things people would love to bitch about.
">tfw no gf"? TFW NO FUCKING MAGIC
TFW EVERYTHING IS ORGANIZED AND ORDERLY
FUCK THAT NOISE
I WANT THE WORLD TO BE FULL OF WONDER AND DISCOVERY
TO NOT KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT OR WHERE WILL I WAKE UP

Love?
Loving waifus with empty eyes and hearts that will love anyone?
W H O G I V E S A S H I T

Magic?
Destroying the very basis of whatever small knowledge we have about the world and opening a whole new world of wonder?
OH NOW WE'RE TALKING BAYBEE

Rather have a solid weapon in my hands, armor protecting my flesh, and my mate at my back so that the world can never over take us.

But to each their own, I guess.

>pic kind of related
Rather have a two handed bar mace than sword though.

>You will never be loved by an elf girl
Never say never, OP.

They're getting pretty convincing these days.

You lucky dog. I can only lick my girl's ass so far. I'm working on it though. My siege of the Ass' Deep won't be in vain.

>the gods created a beautiful self-lubricating orifice specifically for dick
>you prefer the orifice that's literally shitty
Into the trash you go, user.

>caring about orgies
>spending your centuries on carnal pleasures rather than real knowledge and power

Remember humans: basic bitches remain the same, whatever race they are. Don't be basic. You may only have slightly more than half a century to work with, but you can still master _something_.

I AM A BEREN, AND SO CAN YOU

-DICTATED BY IOP, PENNED BY IOP JESUS (Elely)

I adopt strays. Usually kittens or middle aged cats.

Using the Elf analogy, I live in a slum and am the local Mr. Rogers. I take care of orphans and war veterans.

Shit up Dawnwillow, nobody wants to hear from a spinster Fisherwoman who's acted like a princess since she was knee-high to a Dwarf.

Because elves fucking suck.

>You will never be loved