Mecha Space Pirate Quest XL

..do not tempt the girl. Right now we get her freedom so she can choose who she'll go for, then we let it naturally happen. Who knows, she may even eat bacon!

...

Tell them were thankful for the presents but the real wedding won't be for a couple of months

On mobile at work didn't realize I double posted

Samantha shakes her head and sighs, "No, it won't explode. However, it does automatically ping the nearest ansible, detects its own coordinates, and sends the location to whoever is on the other end. I would surmise that to be General Fairchild, the one who put Clemmy in SOUL in the first place. It's funny, I assumed she would always be holding her leash. They've been friends ever since Fairchild pulled Clemmy off the ship she'd been living alone on for more than a year. It's the worst-kept secret in SOUL that General Fairchild dislikes men and does favors for the women she gets under her thumb. She likes them younger and generally of lower rank or otherwise impressionable, according to my information. In other words, someone like the Butcher is practically irresistable to her. Pretty and indebted." She begins snapping some pictures with her PC.

"Mmmn, so she knows this mech is here, on my colony?" Red Siren crosses her arms, looking uncomfortable, "Maybe we should destroy the beacon."

"We could." Samantha agrees, "Or turn it off, or something. It shouldn't be hard, you could probably do it with your pistol."

"So long as it's gone. Or we could...send it back." The idol's scarlet lips suddenly curl around a mischievous grin, "Hoo, I just had an idea. We should...ah, no, you wouldn't be interested. You're a soldier too, after all, I'm sure disrespecting one of your commanding officers would upset you." She sighs, downcast.

[Continued]

Good, were going to marry them all at some point so might as well propose to them now when were not in the middle of a war

The dark-haired girl grits her teeth slightly, "What upsets me is when my teacher, the greatest swordsman I've ever met, puts his heart and soul into a project to make the UJCIDF the heroic organization it's supposed to be only to get pushed out of the way and sidelined by someone whose greatest accomplishment is being born into the right family." Samantha replies evenly, a sudden spark in her eyes as she glances from the beacon to Red Siren.

The idol nods smugly, "I was just thinking how funny it would be if she saw the beacon coming back to her, only to find out that Clemmy and the Flowerhorn aren't with it."

Samantha smiles. It's not a nice smile, "You know, I might just have something to add to that..." She looks down at the body pillow with the marital aid attached.

The two women lock eyes. Red Siren starts laughing, a throaty laugh with the tip of her fan pressed against her mouth, "Ohohohoho~"

Samantha finds herself joining in, "Fufufufu~"

Together, they wheel off the augmented dakimakura and the locator beacon, laughing all the way.

[Continued]

On the one hand, Clemmy might be mad they got rid of her favorite toy, on the other hand she can ride the real thing whenever the hell she damn well pleases so she probably has forgotten about it at this point.

Fairchild will never stop being the butt of every joke. She'll probably REEEE at the news when we rescue fatima and this will not help.

Well, I just received kind of a worrying phone call. My dad fell down. It wasn't a bad fall, which is always a worry, and he doesn't need to go to the hospital, but he's in some pain and having trouble getting around. I'm going to go over to his place and keep him company while doing some of the chores he can't do right now (feeding his animals, finishing up the lawn before it gets dark). I'll still be running the game, but my posts will be a little slow for the next three hours or so.

Also, do you want to see Fairchild's reaction, or go straight to the Mars mission? It's up to you, guys!

Its all fun and games until she shows up with multiple military battleships and a grudge.

give us fairchilds reaction, something for us to laugh over.

No problem Wong, family comes first.

As for what's next, I really want to see the look on fairchild's face when she receives a pillow with our smiling face on it, with I can only assume is a twelve inch erect dick attached to it.

I want to save fairchild's reaction for when the mission is over. I want to see if this entire thing affects her after all. Hope your father is alright. Always a worry when family gets hurt.

Lets go for the reaction, hope your dad's alright man

>twelve inch erect dick attached to it
attach a note to it saying "1/2 scale model)

I almost feel bad for Fairchild with how much we screw with her

Almost.
but who knows, if she somehow redeems herself we might act as a wingman so she gets her own waifu.

Pretty sure nothing is going to really redeem her. She's female space hitler who hired the person who killed our brother and a crew of pirates who used mind broken girls as the bridgecrew for the fattest fuck.

So we Space Pirates are her Jews?

More like she wants ti gad anything with a penis

yeah, its incredibly unlikely but weird shit can happen.

No, the Avalonians are the jews. We're more american when japan bombed our shit. Didn't give a fuck, but now it's personal.

Problem is how is Clemmy going to react if we kill Fairchild

who said anything about kill, or even us doing it? As is, Fairchild is not full rooted in just yet. She's trying very hard to get support everywhere and get the foundation of what she needed, but we likely crippled her badly. With no support, she is no threat. If she goes rogue, even Clemmy will likely be against her.

Wong returns. The lawn was not at all mowed and there were a lot of things to do, plus having dinner with Pop. The vote seems to be for reaction, so we'll get right to that.

Welcome back, Wong. Yesss, let us watch the reaction. I need a giggle.

Were far past grudge at this point

General Hermione Fairchild, a hard-working and ambitious woman, keeps her lips pursed into a thin line as she hits the intercomm button shortly after terminating a very important ansible call.

"'We can't send a military expedition to Auditorium with Avalon threatening the system'" She mimics in an overly-chipper voice, resisting the urge to hit something, "That arrogant little...he may be the Planetary Chairman's son, but that little shit forgets that we don't live in the Feudal bloody era anymore and his father will be up for election by the end of the decade." She looks at the picture on the wall, and feels herself calm down a little. A young girl with pink hair in an Academy uniform, holding onto the arm of a taller, older girl wearing a graduate's robe. The older girl has a serene smile and long, auburn hair, "I've still kept our promise." She says, smiling in a way that most people who know her aren't familiar with, "I'm going to clean things up. People like him don't have a place in the new era, you always said stuff like that." She sighs a little, "No matter what it takes. No matter who gets in my way."

Her PC makes a tiny, almost muted boop, and she checks it, "Yes, yes, Auditorium again..." She mutters, before her eyes abruptly widen. The signal is coming from a bay on Europa.

Within ten minutes she has the name and location of the ship, a completely legitimate and triple-verified shipping cruiser. It goes to Auditorium, but then again, most of them do and if you bring the hammer down on one you have to bring it down on the rest. She has it locked down, not a single member of the cruiser allowed to leave and not a single civilian allowed to enter, not even the usual inspectors, within fifteen minutes.

[Continued]

>She doesn't know where our mother's son
Oh what she has coming

That isn't confirmed and might actually be wrong. You use your real surname, after all, it all depends on if she knows who your father is or not.

You know, it's funny. If fairchild did a bit of digging around mom's death, found and adopted the pair of us, this entire situation would likely be different. Stable home may get Roarke into the military, Triple C would likely still have his legs, and chances are we'd likely be wild enough to get Sammy, but not too wild as to grab all the chicks.

Truely she has done fucked up somewhere along the line trying to keep that promise.

A line of troopers in heavy but compact power armor crosses the entire bay, parting to allow the General through. Energy rifles are pointed at the heads of every single one of the ship's officers. A scanning crew leaves the ship just as she arrives, pausing momentarily and hurrying in her wake to inform her of the beacon's location and that there are no traces of explosives.

Her small feet in their elegant but comfortable black boots eat up the distance from the loading dock to the cargo bay of the cruiser itself in what seems like seconds. Before she even has time to really think, she's standing in front of the door to a sealed shipping crate, one of the massive ones used for transporting mecha. As she reaches for the door, she hesitates, an oddly familiar memory striking her.

It was back when she had fresh, new, captain's insignia on her uniform, the golden arrows gleaming bright. The sound of a girl's sobbing voice over the comms, babbling in gratitude after hearing another human voice after floating in space for so long. She remembers the airlock opening and that slender, malnourished body falling into her arms. She remembers those pretty, pretty eyes and the tinge of something feral in them, and the strange sense of horrified desire she felt when she first reviewed the derelict ship's vidlogs and saw the destruction the young then-Sergeant had inflicted with just a standard Palomino-class mech.

She smiles, and leans her forehead against the cold metal, "You're not in there this time, are you?" She says, sadly. "He wouldn't give you back, men only know how to take things away."

She turns the handle, then scowls when she realizes it's locked. Without a moment's hesitation, she snatches the energy rifle out of the nearest soldier's hands and unlocks it manually. With plasma. It's only a minute or so later she kicks the smouldering portal open and strides inside.

[continued]

But then we'd have to put up with Keith

By that point we'd be his commanding officer. Then we could bright slap his shit first chance we get. Hell, we could probably bright slap his shit every day.

I almost feel bad about this. You know, if she wasn't a horrifying monster.

Well we are a pirate. Making people we dont like feel bad is the least we can do.

>You thought it was your waifu
>BUT IT WE ME, ROARKE

A beam of light from her PC sweeps across the darkened shipping container, settling on some kind of bundle in the center.

"Ma'am..." The soldier behind her protests, "We cannot allow you to go in first, it's against reg-Hrrk!" The soldier's voice cuts off in coughing as the General slams the butt of her own rifle into her belly in the process of handing it back.

She marches forward, the beam crossing over an incredibly confident smile and a mane of long orange hair emblazoned on a long pillow. A bulge inside the pillowcase reveals the location of the beacon. She slowly lowers the beam of light. She sees something that makes her eyes narrow with rage. She sees a note tied to that something. Fully anticipating that she is going to be very, very angry in a moment she detaches the note with a grimace and reads it.

"A consolation prize?" She murmurs to herself in an exceptionally calm voice.

She turns to the soldier in the doorway, and issues an order.

[Continued]

Captcha is the absolute worst tonight.

popcorn intensifies

The explosion flashes brighter than any fireworks across the viewports. "How unfortunate, at this distance the radiation from that poor, faulty fusion generator has fried the cameras and obliterated the record of the past hour." The General takes a deep breath, finally feeling her heartrate start to slow. A sense of deep satisfacton fills her.

"Are we blaming pirates for this, ma'am?" The attractive aide at her shoulder is as attentive as always.

"No. The Captain of that ship realized that the outdated sensors on his ship had failed to detect a critical fusion core breach, and heroically chose to avoid docking and go down with all hands. Make sure his name makes it to JNN, and that the media mentions his company positively. Tie in a safety message, starship captains should be aware that proper maintenance isn't just something to put off."

[Continued]

did she just sink the transport ship with all hands still?

...Damn Fairchild. That is goddamned cold.

Ice cold

Ya thankfully we didn't send Judah

Hey Wong since were probably not going to finish the rescue mission tonight, any chance you can run tomorrow night?

"We're going back to the Iulia Maesa. We have preparations to make for the journey to Mars. After all, I have a wedding to attend, and I intend to look my best." She feels more like smiling now, "Bethany, where are my Wels-classes?"

The aide checks something on her PC, "The Cincinnatus and Squad A, along with the S-Lionfish and its pilot, have been delayed by an emergency rescue. The loss of the Green Skulls has led to considerable unrest in their home territory, occasionally civilian ships are getting caught in the crossfire."

"I should have expected something like that." The General sighs. "And where is that idiot Regina with the old Jaburo and whatever half-rusted mecha I left on that thing?"

"Called to the Planetary Chairman's estate. I thought you read that message I sent you?" Bethany looks up from her notes.

Hermione grunts and manages to look at least slightly guilty. She'd unlocked Explicit mode in Secret Flower Garden V: The Exchange Student, that day, and hadn't had much attention to spare for anything else, "I really do not have time to worry about that sheepheaded woman's daily activities. I'll have her scouring her ship on her knees and reduced to the lowest rank I can conceivably think of for allowing such positive coverage of the Iron Kestrels and forming an alliance with them, of all things. I'm not surprised even Roarke Starwind didn't want her, his damned father at least had good taste."

[Continued]

Tomorrow no, Friday yes.

>finish the rescue mission

Depending on how the various complications go, it might be more than a single thread before you've finished it.

Oh she bloody knows we're her crush's kid. Well, it's going to be fun hearing her reeeee when Mr Rage is left at the alter.

Meanwhile, back on board a small, unremarkable transport of similar make to the one that just met its end off Europa but hastily configured to carry mecha instead of cargo, you have just finished cleaning up and have just grabbed your lunch after going over the Knuckle Kaiser for the fifth time today and making sure its systems are functioning optimally. You, Roarke Starwind, are on your way to Mars, aboard the newest addition to your rapidly growing fleet.

The best thing about Karen's new delicacy is that it's easy to eat in space. Real food puts meat bars to shame, in your opinion, no matter how many pilots claim they've flown for so long that they've developed a taste for the things. You're munching on a meatbread as you walk down the hallways of your new ship, feeling a little smaller than you're used to with the new, larger crew and new, larger corridors. It's going to be another few hours before the microgate projector recharges, and when it does, you'll be face-to-face with the Red Planet.

How would you like to spend that time?

>[With one of the girls, name one]
>[Hanging out with your bros]

>[Hanging out with your bros]
gotta spend time with your bros

>>[Hanging out with your bros]
The bros deserve some respect considering what we are going to be doing and as is, we will be going into a tricky situation.

>[Hanging out with your bros]

>[With one of the girls, name one]

We haven't had a real moment with Sam or Clemmy for a while. Spend some time with one then the other, if not just Clemmy

>>[Hanging out with your bros]

You decide to spend some time with your bros. After all, you're about to go on a dangerous mission, and you're in command.

The transport ship doesn't have a bar of its own, but it does have a lounge, and true to form Richard has lugged a few barrels of beer onboard. He and Doctor Clancy are both looking at Captain Oda with expressions of disbelief. You're surprised to see Duncan here at all, you expected him to stay on Auditorium with Athena.

Doctor Clancy speaks first, "There's no such goddamned thing as a woman loving a man too much. You have a word for something that doesn't exist, Cap."

Richard chimes in, "Absolutely. Hell, the more Miles loves me the happier I am. You're full of shit and a...a whatever you called it is just some kind of ancient Japanese myth."

Mohammed, who is listening in what you would guess is flabbergasted silence, gratefully acknowledges your interruption with a wave, "Salaam, Admiral!"

"KONNICHIWA, ANIKI! Neh, Roarke-sama, did you come to eat your benten with us?" Oda waves cheerfully. His forehead protector is freshly polished.

"Hey Dude, help yourself to some beer." Richard jerks his thumb towards the kegs.

"...And once you've done that, sit down and talk some sense into this madman. I thought it would be useful to get another account of how my glorious Tarrasque was beaten, but he started talking about close-combat tactics...which was useful, I admit...and then somehow devolved into talking about that crazy blonde girl of yours and insisting she's some kind of Japanese folk spirit thing called a yannyroo or something."

[Continued]

God Oda you never fail to get a laugh out of me

Clemmy is more deredere than yandere desu

You grab a space-compatible closed-top mug and put the pipe from the keg into it, a clear section letting you see when it's full.

"Aniki, can you believe this? I haven't encountered such hostility since I asked the noble bushi Pierre Blanchett-san whether his sister had been born a waifu or if she had ascended to it at some time during her life." Yoritomo looks hurt.

"See what I mean? More Japanese folk animals or whatever he's talking about. Sammy Blanchett is a nice girl, not one of your damned youkai or whatever-you-call-em!" Duncan scratches his head, looking irritated.

"I shall forgive your ignorance, Clancy-san, you are a gaijin and do not know better. Also, yandere are very real, they are dangerous but precious carnivores that deserve proper appreciation." Oda sniffs dismissively.

"Yandere?" You ask, before cursing yourself, realizing that you've just given Oda an excuse. Well, never let them see you sweat. You adjust your shades, take a sip of beer through the straw, and take a seat in the rough circle of manliness that the five of you have formed.

"Hai, sempai! Alice-chan is unquestionably a yandere. They are a special sort of waifu, written extensively of by the home-dwelling sages, although there was fierce debate as to whether they could earn the exalted rank of 'best girl'. For the information of certain unenlightened individuals..." He looks directly at Doctor Clancy, "....this is much like being a saint or a bodhisattva. Personally, I fully believe in her dangerous spirit and the strength of her insane love. Of course, her good taste in mugs and on reliable individuals who can provide break-proof goods of high quality at a reasonable price may have me somewhat biased. Now, among yandere, there are two species. Each is defined by how it treats the object of its heart..."

>[Allow him to continue]
>[Stop his words of madness]

She attacked Roarke with a knife to get his clothes off, man.

>[Allow him to continue]
"He speaks words of wisdom, gentlemen, though it is hard to decipher at times."

>>[Allow him to continue]
Never change Oda

>>[Allow him to continue]

That's definitely not yandere. She didn't do it to hurt Roarke. She hasn't hurt anyone that "prevented" her from getting closer to Roarke at all.

>Interrupt with a description of clemmy's idea of foreplay and then ask "that basically what you mean oda"?

waifu wars have become a religion. Perhaps to one man, but still..

>[Allow him to continue]
However, gauge the reactions of everyone and be ready to break the ice if they start to look at him.. rather crazy. We did land the killing blow on the Tarrasque's pilot and can field some answers, such as us using terrain preparation, and a specialty weapon to take it down. If this sort of tech becomes common, disruptor weaponry might be useful.

>[Allow him to continue]
Lets see how far the rabbit hole goes

Shes is transforming from a Yandere into a Deredere

"He speaks words of wisdom, gentlemen, even if it must be translated sometimes." Fuck it, you decide to just let him go on.

Oda looks incredibly pleased with himself, "Hell yeah aniki, I knew you understood how things are. See, a yandere is a woman who is driven by a passion so hot that it burns her rationality. To them, a single object of devotion is more precious than the whole universe. They come in two main, loose species, the possessive yandere and the obsessive yandere. The possessive yandere views the object of her devotion as 'hers', immutably and ineffably. This shapes the way she thinks to a kowai degree. If someone challenges their ownership, even indirectly, they cannot help but react as if they were facing a thief at the very least. Worse still, they have no qualms about hurting or abusing their beloved, except for where that would hinder their enjoyment of them. The possessive yandere is dangerous and can never be allowed even a momentary instant of rulership. The obsessive yandere is a different sort of creature. She views the one she loves as the highest good, to be cherished and protected. As a possessive yandere twists the world around them to create an ideal reality for herself, an obsessive yandere will twist her internal world to any degree to create an ideal reality for their beloved. An obsessive yandere would rather die than cause the target of their affections discomfort, and while they are more pleasant than possessive yanderes, they are also more likely to meet a sad end out of love-stained duty. However, they are still yanderes, and love has melted the straight lines of perception and left them warped. An obsessive yandere is perfectly willing to do things 'for the own good' of their beloved that might horrify said beloved, such as removing an annoying girlfriend or bad boss from existence to prove their devotion."

"She, uh, cut open my flight suit once with a mono-knife. Does that count?" You're genuinely unsure.

[Continued]

"Probably a little. She probably just wanted to fight you a little. Senpai, what you have on your hands is a classic case of a yandere changing for the better. It's rare, but it happens." He shrugs.

"Still sounds like bullshit, sometimes women are just crazy. Hell, men can be crazy too. I think we're seeing that right here with all of this 'two dimensional heavenly realms' nonsense." Duncan snorts.

>[Ask Duncan about your upgraded Rhinehawk]
>[Ask Duncan about the upgraded Tarrasque]
>[Ask Mohammed what he's so busy doing on his PC over there]
>[Ask Richard how things are with Miles]

>>[Ask Mohammed what he's so busy doing on his PC over there]
>>[Ask Richard how things are with Miles]

Time to talk about the other guys waifus, I can't wait till we find out who Oda's is

>[Ask Mohammed what he's so busy doing on his PC over there]
Put him in headlock so all that sticks out is a puff of curly hair. Show the boys the hot n fresh risque picture of our favourite CO.

>>[Ask Mohammed what he's so busy doing on his PC over there]
>>[Ask Richard how things are with Miles]

>>[Ask Duncan about the upgraded Tarrasque]
>>[Ask Mohammed what he's so busy doing on his PC over there]
Moe first. He has been quiet. Then we should know about the tarrasque so we can know for sure what it's capable of. Don't want to get cocky after all.

Someone has been awfully quiet. You throw your arm around Mohammed's neck in a headlock, "What's got you smiling so much, Moe?"

"Gyaa! Admiral, it is nothing, just...just..." He puts his PC away and flails around until you release him, "Regina and I took some pictures together when we were on Auditorium. I was just thinking about her." He admits, "I know, fate is in the way, but still..."

Richard nods, "You're still thinking about her anyway, right? That's alright. It's a good sign. Don't let fate stop you. Hell, look at Roarke. Sure, we've got good cause to believe her dad was murdered and that we're rescuing her, but we have no real evidence. The truth is, Roarke misses her and wants her back, so we're going to go get her and leave a few bootprints on a puffed-up Commodore's backside."

"She's in danger." You insist.

"You missss heeeeer." Richard smirks. Miles must be rubbing off on him.

"Actually, I was thinking of writing a letter to Regina. To see how she's doing and let her know I'm thinking about her." Mohammed interjects to save your skin.

[Continued]

>
>Actually, I was thinking of writing a letter to Regina. To see how she's doing and let her know I'm thinking about her."
good man.

Normally you'd think that was a little cheesy, but in this case she seems like the sort of person who enjoys love letters. "Good man." You nod at him, refilling your beer.

"Do you think I'll ever see her again?" He asks quietly.

>[Give him hope]
>[Gently disillusion him]

>>[Give him hope]
Roarke doesn't believe in hopelessness

>>[Give him hope]
We'll probably see her soon enough. Just keep at it and be you.

>[Give him hope]
Moe we are pirates, It's not a matter of if, only whether or not you want to and can anyone stop you from doing so.

>>[Give him hope]

"Of course." You respond without hesitation, "We're pirates, it's not a matter of if, or worrying about the consequences. You want to see her, and someday you'll be stronger than any obstacles in your way, that's how it works. Besides, I'm sure we'll see her again soon. Just keep at it." You smile and clap him on the back. He looks heartened, nods, and starts typing on his PC.

"Nicely said, Dude." Richard nods approvingly.

"Thanks. So how are you and Miles getting along?" You ask.

Richard smiles hugely, "Every day is wonderful. I'm thinking about making an honest woman of her, pal."

You snort, "Nothing will make Miles Longshadow an honest woman. She'll be a foul-mouthed little criminal forever whether or not she has a ring on her finger or a dozen hairy little Ricklets following her around like ducklings."

"Don't get so cocky. You've got four women conspiring to be the first one to marry you. Five if Fatima gets involved. You're the one who needs to gird his loins and stop being so cavalier about this shit, you're in more danger than anyone else here." Richard points accusingly at you.

"What, really?" You're a little surprised at the confidence of his response.

"Yeah. Oh yeah. Clemmy started it, and that put the idea in Karen's head, so naturally Rosita's gonna want to beat Karen, and Samantha will probably beat them all to it...at least, if she does, Miles owes me a six-pack and oral since that's what we bet for. They only keep quiet about it when you're around. Didn't you think it was odd Rosita didn't raise a peep about coming with you rather than staying behind to defend her colony? She's schemin'." Richard replies, with the confidence that comes from having known you for a long time.

"Such are the perils of three-dimensional women." Oda nods sagely.

"Rosita does not scheme." You grumble.

"She schemes, Dude. She loves you more than a pig loves truffles, but she's schemin' because she wants to have you." He grins behind his beard.

Much to my regret, I'm starting to nod off. I'll see you fine folks Friday, where we will go to Mars, I promise.

Well looks like we have to figure a way of marrying all of thrm at the same time

Night man, oh I wanted to ask you told us about Rosita's and Karen's caller id pictures on our phone, how about Sam and Clemmy's

"Such are the perils of three-dimensional women." Oda nods sagely.
Oda you lovable bastard. You really are weeb Solomon.

I will see you then. Managed to make the Dutchman's melee and range loadouts so I'll post them next thread.

Clemmy's is a rather poorly taken selfie of her face making this expression, Sam's is a rather nice picture of her in her academy uniform.

Of course Clemmy has the cutest one

She definitely was pretty yandere with I WILL HAVE HIM AND MARRY HIM AND GET INTO ARMY WITH ME

But we just aren't the usual harem anime protag who can only meekly be dragged along.
We wrassled that tiger down.

Goodnight Wong.

DESU it's for the best to start the action right up in the new thread.

don't forget to archive.

Hey Wong you need to update the RhineHawk in the pastebin