Time to confess your sins and reveal your secret shames from tabletops

I once GMed a game while drinking.
noone even picked up on this.

Is drinking not standard GM behavior?

This. I keep a flask of liquid creativity ready just for GMing.

I'm glad I inspired you.

I make a bunch of plot hooks and then tie whatever hook they pick up on back to my railroad plot. Illusion of choice, fuckers.

Every female character i make has a dick and is an aggressive lesbian.
No one has really questioned it yet beyond why i always make them aggressive and i say i just like my women that way and i personally can't convincingly RP a shy or quiet type of woman and i'd rather go around banging chicks than dudes which most just nod sagely at.
The only time shit went off was when someone questioned how one of the current harem members i kept got pregnant and i had to bullshit some crap about occasionally one of them wants an actual dicking. I never mention the fact i'm the one dicking and we just bring in nu-male types for humiliation shenanigans.
Oddly enough only one GM so far has ever had an issue with it as it usually never gets that far and he actually let me fluff my all female burgeoning knight based noble family as a result of some "curse" thats genetic and left it at that. It wasn't even an ERP game.
I apologize for nothing.

We have similar tastes.

I enjoyed D&D 4E

There is literally nothing wrong with this.

I do close to no prep before the first session, no world-building, no character creation... After the first session I still keep the prep to a minimum.
I have the unpopular tendency to just go with improvising, people who do a lot of world building are better off writing a novel.

I also think Dungeon World is a very good game just because of this. I have little experience with other games.

I have sinned against the hive-mind that is Veeky Forums.

I dig the wbuilding and can't help but have some ideas beforehand, but there's nothing wrong with your way user
Actually I'd like to go fully unprepared once and see what happens

I have tried to force tpks at least two times. I knew it was bad but I didn't know any other way to push the story forward.

I want to thank my players for being stupidly stubborn and not give up even when there seems to be no hope. They have managed to survive with minimal losses.

Thanks brah, I know my way works for me, but most people are more comfortable with more prep.
I do suspect hard-core world builders would rather like to make Skyrim-style video games and straight up railroaders would rather just write stories or movies. But there's no real evidence for that suspicion.

I always pick a "victim" when I GM.

I will relentlessly bully them throughout the entire campaign. Nothing will ever go their way so long as I can control them.

Why?

I wonder why the ERP threads were cast out of Veeky Forums. Not like they were lowering the prices of the neighbourhood, quests still existed. And the threads were all as blue as any other thread.

It's probably the only way he can get an erection

Because i can and because i want to.

I only do intrigue and propaganda.
I couldn't care less about the plot.
Combat is the most boring and tedious part of rpgs, esp in dnd and its derivatives. I'd rather just play x wing.

Violence and murder = okay
Sexual content = not okay
Welcome to western ideologies

Because the hurt feelings brigade couldn't handle people having unapproved fun. Nothing more.

Literally the feelings of a professionally offended minority were considered more important than harmless conversations.

I was going to say this is a silly notion and user probably has his reasons, but then

Every time I create a character, I ask myself what their perversion is.

My latest character was a rogue who was really, really eager to get into her adopted sister's pants.

A pity the threads died in the cold wastes of /soc/

It's on /d/

That's /wsg/ you're thinking of, not the erp threads.

I thought it was on /aco/?

Nah. We went to another chan and brought those we thought appropriate with us.

how does this happen in games

Im running a One Player - One DM game for a friend of mine that is realistic/low magic/ narrativist for the sake of story and setting building.

He has no idea that I have never rolled a single die for this game. This lie will continue until his character dies/story ends

I play female characters of all classes like alpha males, i actively hit on female NPC's, fade to black, new addition to harem(if i'm keeping one) comes with us when we leave and the group gets a new maid. Unless its specifically an ERP game in which i'll see if the GM will keep that shit secret until the penultimate moment cause i like messing with people.
If you're asking about the noble house i quickly had several daughters who i routinely tried to marry off to other noblemans daughters and around 3 session later someone finally asked how i had daughters at all considering i married a princess and kept only female servants on hand. GM panicked and said "its a genetic curse on user's side of the bloodline." And everyone just kind of nodded and said okay.

I'm not the greatest DM but have been stuck as a forever DM for years. Recently one of my players has decided to take up the mantle of DMing and he is pretty awful at it in my opinion but I am hesitant to criticize him too much because he may just give up on DMing entirely (which he did last time I told him things weren't working well) and I'm enjoying just being a player for once.

It seems logical user. Plus I am entirely too guilty of this myself. World and the game system are just too much fun, and hate when I write this incredible emotionally deep character just to have my players give one word answers or just not fucking respond to dialogue. Infuriating.

Because some people are so sad that they need to use GMimg as a way to feel power over others, usually as a result of feeling powerless over their own lives.

I don't really care about combat and do as little as possible when prepping for it.

I will force scenes to match background music or music I'm currently listening out of game, which can create memorable but jarring changes of tone in games.

If a game I actually get to play in crumbles, I will import expies of the character I was playing into another game I'm running as a prominent npc.

Most of my characters are inadvertently 'waifuable,' but I don't intentionally make this happen and think most of them are raging bitches.

Wbuilding helps me as a framework, but I change it constantly to match my players actions and is never set in stone until it matters or has come up.

Hi drew I agree and I liked your dming

I have sex with my wife on the gametable. I don't even wash it afterwards.

I once GMed a game sober.

I've used my character from a WoW ERP as a quest giver and patron for the PCs, completely unchanged except for the fact that his weird slave thing was never mentioned. He actually turned out to be pretty well liked, because he didn't try to hide the fact that he was using the PCs as pawns in an elaborate game.

I struggle with GMing combat and dungeon delves.

you're abhorrent

>tfw

I have gm'd a game blackout drunk, as well as play in a game blackout drunk.

Thanks, you've finally helped me discover a perk of playing with neckbeard virgins.

Not bragging here but i've done much the same and i've met others that have done it as well.
I've come to the conclusion, at least in my case and i suspect its much the same in others, that gaming tables are invariable JUST the right size, height, and stability for that sort of activity.
It's why I don't do that on the dinner table as its just a bit too high and it one of those extenders so i fear it would snap in half or something.

One of my characters interactions with another PC almost turned into attempted /ss/, completely unintentionally.

...

I've been settled into a regular online gaming community for years. Maybe 10 rotating regular players, various games rising and falling, two-three concurrently running a week. Great friends, many keks are had over the IRC room, personal dramas shared, all that --

I don't give a fuck.

I put on a charade and perform the minimum required inputs to remain in 'the loop'. These people are abhorrent to me, but they believe we are friends. I've just been using them for co-players running on half a decade. Because they're solid, they have gamer etiquette. They show up to every game, they roleplay, they maintain independent system mastery, etc, whatever.

There've been dozens of situations where I just kind of awkwardly entertain the notion like I can't stand these cringey clowns out of game and that we're chums, that I'm not just using them to populate my hobby with better-vetted-than-PUG bodies. I actually really hate several of them, but you know, the integrity of a favorite pastime has always taken priority.

Every world I have ever gmed in is in the sane cosmology and my players have no idea.

That may not be a sin, but the fact a galactic and planar disaster of apocalyptic proportions is on the way, and will kill literally every character they have ever made in the single greatest TPK I or they will ever witness.

The best part? They actually have a chance to stop it in every game, they just have to explore the various subtle hints I throw in every game.

But, I also know they frequent tg. That's right fuckers, maybe I'm your GM, maybe that ultimate TPK is coming for you. Or maybe not. Eyes to the skies gentleman, eyes to the skies

I can't because I tend to fall asleep hugging anything nearby while drunk

That's kind of cute user.

For posting in the shame thread you seem pretty proud.

Good job.

I saw one in /trash/ some time before
Don't ask why I was here

I wish I knew how to run games for myself.

I hate this fucking hobby but I am too lazy to get another.

No it isn't, I go to a party, get some alcohol and end up falling asleep just before I hit drunk and hogging the sofa hugging pillows.

Different user here. It's not, it's really not. As someone who has to deal with a similar case very often i can safely say its a pain in others asses and generally embrassing to everyone involved.
It's gotten to the point i actually had a buddy from california send me a sandbox tree trunk and now he gets to hug that and think about his drinking habit for the week or so afterwords.

This guy's right it's a pain in the ass, fortunately I only get drunk enough for that twice a year at most and I blame my uncle for that.

Most of the time I just have one beer and stop because I do not want to fall asleep anywhere that's not home or a relative's house.

I like playing 3.5 and Pathfinder because it boasts near never ending character customization.

Every time I play a game I will get bored of my character, be dissatisfied with how I designed them, or something else to that effect. End result is that I try to get them killed through exceedingly stupid decisions. Provided it hasn't been too soon since last time I'd done it.

That's right, 3pf would be astonishingly good if all options were equally good

My characters aren't really far from self-inserts

My characters are one note jokes. Like I have an NPC who only exists to piss the PC's off. He's a good guy, nominally on their side but he's also there to just make them angry.

He's a complete dick who is better than them in every way. Why? Because it makes them angry.

Write a book then, fucko.

Reality and fantasy are always different, grass is always greener.

I was picturing user hosting a comfy session before falling asleep hugging his gm screen. I also have an opposite reaction and get wired when drinking.

I just wish heavy improvisers would stop gloating about their laziness.

Yet another reason to play online.

It is time to confess a most heinous sin.

I was GMing an ERP and one player didn't want to do the E in ERP so I made his character get raped via aphrodisiac tea.

Why did he join ERP in first place?

don't do that

See that'd be fine and kinda funny, exactly because that shits comfy experience for drunks. Now when its shit like the only couch, you, a cactus, maybe you wake up and its a TV he just happened to see before passing out. Then it becomes pain in the ass tier. Sadly most aren't comfy drunks.

I've experienced something similar to this, like in the workplace for example. Best thing you can do is try to detach your emotions to these persons and control your reactions to the stupid shit they do. Just remember nothing they say or do matters, they won't do nothing much with their lives anyways. After that you won't even care when they fail in live and kill themselves, trust me you won't feel anything.

Why not? He was there for an ERP session then said "no, fuck you." To everyone there. At that point just leave, don't bring the table down with your petty ass.

My biggest shame?... Oh boy, whenever I make a female character she's always this bookish intellectual brunette whose usually a mage, sometimes a cleric, and I'm wondering if that's my ideal woman. Always feel a little awkward RPing as a woman, so when I can I just roll up a Barbarian HE-MAN or some kind of frontiersmen.

My other regret, having all the women in my stories well endowed and having a Elf as the main villain every time.

I like writing systems more than running games. What do?
Not that user

I love breaking my players. Not in combat, I stomp on their hopes and dreams by throwing as much shit at them as I can outside of combat. I get them to as many extreme situations as much as I can and when they think that they reached safety or will finally catch a break I throw some more shit on them.
It's a blizzard, you don't have food or equipment but you finally arrived to some village or town? Too bad, it was raided by orcs, better GTFO out of there because they might still be in that area. Looks like there will be another few days of traveling through frozen hell for you.

Was this ERP part of a bigger game that was not mainly ERP? Because it doesn't sound like he just created a character that whoopdy bop got suddenly raped?

Because seriously, holding an ERP mid-game when one player explicitly doesn't want it sounds a lot like a That GM business.

How much was this ERP session discussed about? Did you ask your players' opinions about it beforehand?

>tfw you can do that with yyour own and nobody would notice
Who here /evildragon/?

I wouldn't know. I figured user meant it was an ERP game not an ERP moment.

But it's so easy to gloat, you could even argue it's justified. I'm a good GM despite prepping so little, and heavy preppers spend so much time on shit they'll never play.
It feels like I've won on every level!

I seemingly tagged the wrong user before.
See

I'm extremely passive with a heaping helping of self-doubt. The last few time we were supposed to have sessions everyone seemed to forget about them and I felt that if I asked them to join I'd just be bothering them. This has killed several games of mine and I wish I could be a little more assertive.

>I think I'm everyone on Veeky Forums

The number of times I've wanted to tell a player how they 'should' play is insane. Sometimes it can be really hard to not blow up at someone for playing a gimmick character, or playing a character who does nothing but follow the party until combat starts.
I've tried to write a novel before, but I don't get the same psychological feedback as I do when I'm DMing.
What I wouldn't give to be part of a decent ERP campaign, just for the experience.

I used to think Dungeon World was a good game.

>when you want to tell the GM he's playing an npc because of how they've been characterized before
>when a player does something so blatantly out of character you stop the game to tell them no

I know your pain

I have no idea what I'm doing.

I think the players are getting suspicious.

Please send help.

I always play the character archetype, half because I always have to be the team leader or else nothing gets done, and half because the only campaigns I ever finished were online, and that group had to break up at least temporarily because of college and grad school stuff.

I'm also somewhat guilty of this one. Less for the fetishy aspect, more because I like to go super in depth with my characterization, and their kinks are a part of that. It only ever came up once, and I don't think people really noticed.

Similar to this, I love escalating situations to bizarre proportions. Just subtly things get worse and worse.

That guy you beat the shit out of in that inn? He was the son of the local lord and now they've framed you for raiding a nearby village and butchering its inhabitants (that his militia actually is responsible for).

Wait you actually beat those kings guard sent to take you in? Oh shit that was the Kings brother. Now you're really in for it.

>4 sessions later

Remember that deal you had to make with the devil to lift the curse slowly starving all of you? Well he's come to collect, but instead he hands you a magic sword and tells you to go kill his rival demon lord. Boy I wonder what's gonna happen next.

That sounds like awful and unhealthy advice.

My gf and I will fuck sometimes during a game that we're playing or one that I'm running online.