For your loyal service to the Crown, the Queen rewards you with a horse-key--one of only three in existence

>For your loyal service to the Crown, the Queen rewards you with a horse-key--one of only three in existence.

But I don't even have a horse to start up with it

I thank her, and direct myself towards my horse, where I insert the key to see what happens

Dude, where's my horse?

I immediately sell it in the nearest shop and use the money to acquire superior magical weapons and new spells.

I only care if it comes with land grants, a badass title and a sweet castle. The social prestige is nice but I can already make all nobles bow before me with compulsion spells anyway.

I politely thank the Queen, and to express my gratitude I reach around her ample hips with an available hand and begin caressing her prodigious, royal member while I continue to vigorously thrust my own instrument into her shapely buttocks from behind. As my remaining hand is occupied with steadying her Majesty, I ask my trusty squire to begin inserting the horse-key into my own buttocks, that I might know the height of ecstasies.

A horse!
A horse!
My kingdom for a horse!

Interestingly I had a GM go bullshit on me for the opposite:

I had a paladin with some high end, but only +! armor. A noble rewarded him a set of like +4 armor of a lesser kind, so it was only a 1 point AC improvement.

I realized however, that the cash value of the new +4 armor was absurd. So I wanted to sell it, pocket a few 100 gold for myself for expanses, then donate the rest to the damaged town.

GM was genuinely pissed in RL over it.

Everybody now!